FOR THE NEXT WEEK, Lexi remained stubbornly sure she’d done the right thing by not telling him how she felt.
But deep down she knew she’d been wrong.
She missed him. Things weren’t the same. He’d shut her out. He’d even gone to Jacob’s for a few days. He’d had a laser procedure done on his leg to lessen the internal scar tissue and muscle damage and his hearing seemed to be better, and he hadn’t needed her help.
Hadn’t needed her.
She thunked her head down on her table and squeezed her eyes shut. Hell.
It was all her. What do you really want? he’d asked. Well, dammit, she wanted so much it terrified her.
It took her a few more days to decide exactly what to do with that knowledge. She brought Cord his mail and he politely thanked her. They had lunch together, but it was strained.
So that evening she took a screwdriver to her showerhead and “broke” it. Then she made lasagna, and when it was ready, she threw together a salad and brought both dishes to his condo.
He opened the door wearing black dress pants and a black button-down shirt, opened at the neck, tie loosened, sleeves shoved up to his elbows.
He looked edible.
He smiled at her but instead of inviting her in, he leaned on the doorjamb. “Hey.”
“Hey. My showerhead’s broken. I need to borrow your shower.” She lifted the dishes. “I brought a bribe.”
“I don’t need a bribe to loan you some hot water.”
“That’s nice of you.”
He said nothing to that as she stepped in past him.
“There’s fresh towels in the cabinet under the sink,” he said when she’d set everything down on the same kitchen counter that he’d had her on, bare-assed, only last week.
She didn’t tell him that she’d rather use his towel instead of a fresh one because it would give her a cheap thrill to know the thick terry cloth had been rubbed over his body before hers. “Thanks,” she said, and headed down the hall toward his bedroom.
“Do you have plans for my showerhead?”
Her nipples went hard. Bad nipples. Slowly she turned to face him.
“Because if you do,” he said, “I’d like to picture it, is all.”
“I thought we weren’t doing that anymore.”
He sent her what could only be described as a wolf smile. “Yes, but I still like to think about it.”
Somehow she managed to resist the magic pull of his smile and left the hallway. Even more miraculously, she resisted the showerhead. Good as it was, it couldn’t compete with the memory of Cord’s fingers and mouth.
When she got out of the water, she toweled dry her wavy hair and left it hanging down her back. She told herself it was for convenience and not because Cord loved it that way.
As they ate, he ran a hand over her hair, then pulled back as if belatedly remembering that they weren’t Naked Friends anymore. She nearly cried. “Why are you all hot and sexy?” she managed to ask, gesturing to his clothes.
He smiled. “Hot?”
Smoking-hot. “You know you are.”
He opened a bottle of wine. “Interview. I think it went well.”
“Good.” She clinked her glass to his and summoned her courage. “To letting go of fears,” she said.
His dark eyes held hers. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
With a warm smile, he drank to that, and when she cleared their dishes she purposely bumped into him at the sink. Reaching out to slip off his tie, she unbuttoned his shirt before he took her wrists in his hands.
“Okay,” she murmured throatily, rubbing against him, her wrists trapped, his tie entangled in her fingertips. “You can tie me up this time. But I get to tie you up next time.”
He laughed low in his throat, as if he liked the sound of that, but he shook his head. “If we were on naked terms, you’d be so on.”
“You’d tie me up?” she asked, intrigued in spite of herself.
“Up, down, any way you wanted it.”
Oh, God. “I miss the naked terms,” she whispered. “I miss them a lot.”
“Me, too.”
They moved into each other. Being back in his arms was heaven on earth. He was big and warm and smelled so damn good. She loved the way he held her, his hands rubbing up and down her back, sinking lower to briefly cup her ass before shifting back as if he’d momentarily been unable to help himself.
She stirred against him, moaning at how hard he was. His head dipped, his cheek skimming her temple, his breath soft in her hair. “Lexi.”
A warning. He wasn’t sure he could resist.
Good. Because she sure as hell couldn’t resist him. She pressed her lips against his throat, then nipped the spot.
He sucked in a breath. “Careful. I bite back.”
She shivered. “I was hoping you would.” Tipping her head up, she kissed him.
He froze a moment, then groaned before drawing her away, holding her by the arms to look into her face.
“Please,” she whispered. “I need this, Cord. I need you.”
“Why?”
He had every right to ask, and this time she had an answer. The one that had haunted her all week. “Because you were right. I’ve spent a lot of time being afraid. Afraid of getting too close, of letting anyone in. But that’s no way to live, and I never even realized it until you.”
“What was it about me?” he asked.
“You make me feel alive.” She slid her hands up his arms, feeling the muscles bunch. “So alive. Please, Cord.”
With a groan, he dipped his head. “I can’t resist you, I don’t know why I tried.” And he kissed her, hard and demanding, until she wasn’t sure of her own name, much less why they’d held back.
She wasn’t sure how they got to his bedroom, either, but suddenly she was standing by his bed. He kissed her again, a sound of approval low in his throat when she kissed him back, but when she started to rip off her clothes, he stopped her. He took over the task himself with slow, sure fingers, getting his mouth involved, too, tasting every inch of skin he exposed. Kissing, licking, nibbling. By the time he had her naked, she was writhing in ecstasy on his bed. Then he wedged his shoulders between her thighs, one hand low on her belly holding her down, the other spread wide on an inner thigh, his tongue driving her halfway out of her mind.
“Please,” she gasped, sliding her fingers into his hair. “Oh, Cord, please.”
“You taste so good.” He slipped a finger into her as he slowly sucked her into his mouth.
His words, along with the vibration of his voice, pushed her right over the edge and she burst, the shock waves rocking her body for long moments afterwards. When she blinked her vision clear, he was holding her close and whispering something she couldn’t catch. Lifting herself up, she pressed him back into the mattress and kissed him, tasting both herself and his own hunger. “Lexi—”
She kissed his shoulder, his collarbone, his nipple.
He hissed out a breath. “I—”
Whatever he’d planned on saying turned into a groan when she nibbled her way down his fantastic abs, and then hovered over the most beautiful erection she’d ever seen.
He didn’t try to talk again. In fact, she was pretty sure he wasn’t breathing.
She caressed one hard thigh, then the other, kissing her way along the eighteen-inch scar there, until he quivered beneath her. Wrapping her fingers around him, she drew him into her mouth.
“Lexi!” His hands came up, sliding into her hair, and when she stroked him with her tongue, his hips came off the bed. “Don’t stop.”
She loved the fact that she’d reduced him to begging the same way he’d done to her, and she settled in to enjoy torturing him some more, but suddenly he hauled her up his body, his fingers digging into her hips like a vise as he buried himself deep with one hard thrust.
They both gasped in tandem pleasure, and emotions hit her hard—need, desire and the sensation of being filled to completion.
She loved him so damn much.
“Cord—”
“Don’t move,” he grated out.
She ran her hands down his chest and rocked her hips. Swearing, he rolled them, pressing her back into the mattress, coming over top of her, looking deep into her eyes as he held her down. “You never listen.”
Her entire body clenched in anticipation as she bent her legs, hugging his hips with her knees. “Cord. God, Cord.”
“I know.” He kissed her hard as he began to move, his hands flat on the mattress on either side of her, his face low, eyes locked on hers. Her hands were on his chest, his arms, anywhere she could reach, and she could feel his muscles bunching and contracting with his every movement.
“I can’t get enough of you,” she whispered, and heard his breath catch. She brought his head down to hers for a searing kiss, and in it she could taste promises and hopes and dreams. Arching up into him, she sobbed out his name as he moved within her, so deep within her, faster and harder until they were both gasping for air, on the very edge, and then she was teetering and then falling into bliss. He was right with her, his arms convulsing tightly around her as he shuddered.
When she opened her eyes, he’d tucked her into his side. He was playing with a strand of her hair, looking into her face. His eyes were soft, melted-chocolate pools she could have drowned in. Leaning in, she pressed her mouth to his chest, feeling his heart still pumping hard as she reached up and touched the side of his face.
He rubbed his cheek across her palm. His thumb skimmed just beneath her eyes and came away wet.
She hadn’t even realized she was crying.
“Lexi.” His voice was husky, rough with emotion.
“I’m sorry. That was…and then this week…” She shook her head. “Did you know my heart hurts when I’m not with you?”
He pressed his forehead to hers. “Same goes. I missed you. I love you, Lexi.”
God. Oh, God, she thought maybe her heart was going to swell right out of her chest. “Then why did you shut me out?”
“You needed the time. But time’s up, Lexi. Stay with me.”
Suddenly she wanted nothing more than to do just that for as many nights as he’d give her. “You mean tonight?”
He came up on an elbow, and his hand stroked the hair from her damp face. “Tonight, yes.”
She let out a breath, telling herself she couldn’t be disappointed. Not when she’d dragged her feet over this very thing.
He kissed her jaw, the tip of her nose, each eye and then her mouth. “Tonight,” he repeated. “And tomorrow. And the next night.”
The knot deep inside her loosened. “I love you, Cord. So much.”
He took a moment to absorb her words, his eyes revealing exactly how much they meant to him. “Then stay, Lexi.”
“For as long as you’ll have me.” She looked at him and saw her future, her everything. “Do you have any thoughts on how long that might be?”
“As long as I have a breath in my body. Is that long enough?”
“I think it just might be.”