IN STARK CONTRAST to the previous evening, tonight Morgan was wearing light blue flannel pj’s decorated with teddy bears. She’d bought them on sale because they were designed for a cold winter evening. But in Shoshone, any evening was suitable for flannel, especially if the person wearing it was feeling sorry for herself and needed a hug.
But the hug she needed was the dangerous kind delivered by a certain cowboy who remained on her mind no matter what DVD she watched or how many cups of cocoa she drank. Giving him up was going to be a major pain in the ass. And in the heart. But it was the right thing to do.
He must think so, too, because he hadn’t responded to her text message. She’d thought breaking up would be hard to do, just like the old song said, but apparently not. All it took were a few words sent via cell phone and they were done. She should be relieved about that.
Instead she wished there was some way she could know that he was home safe. That kind of thinking had to stop eventually, because she couldn’t keep track of his comings and goings in the future. But this one time, when she knew about his road trip, she’d like to get word that he’d successfully brought the goat home and was safe in his own bed.
She’d find out in the next few days. Shoshone was a small town and somebody would mention Gabe’s trip while they were eating at the diner, or having drinks at Spirits and Spurs. Or one of the hands from the Last Chance would talk about it when he came into the feed store for supplies. Word would filter to Morgan through the grapevine. But she wanted to know now.
As she refilled her mug with cocoa from the pan on the stove, the doorbell rang and she splashed the hot liquid all over. Her hand shook as she put down the mug and grabbed a dishrag to swipe at her pj top.
She knew who was at the door. A visitor at nine-thirty at night could be only one person. Maybe she hadn’t broken up with him as completely as she’d thought. But at least he’d come home safe and sound. The tight knot in her stomach loosened.
The doorbell rang a second time. Okay, she’d break up with him in person, and this time she’d make it stick. She wouldn’t be the perfect daughter-in-law, and the fallout from that could be huge in a town where the Chances were the reigning royal family. She could kiss her real estate business goodbye.
She opened the door, her speech of farewell on the tip of her tongue.
Gabe obviously had other uses for her tongue, because he swooped in before she could utter a word, crushed her to him and kissed her like a soldier coming home from the war. He held her tight and her struggles were in vain. She’d never quite realized before how strong he was.
Naturally, the longer he spent kissing her, the less she struggled. Kissing Gabe was her second-favorite activity in the world. But she would not allow that activity to lead to her most favorite activity in the world.
At last he came up for air and gazed down at her, his chest heaving. “I missed you so much. You’re my Doozie.”
“Excuse me? Did that kiss deprive you of oxygen to the brain?”
“Let’s go in.”
She wasn’t quite sure how he accomplished it, but in seconds they were inside her living room and he’d kicked the door shut with his booted foot.
He kept her in a tight grip, refusing to let her go. His expression was endearingly intent. “You’re my Doozie. I’m your goat.”
She figured out that reuniting the goat and the horse had turned symbolic for him. “Romantic as that sounds, I have to disagree. You haven’t found your Doozie yet.”
“I have. You’re it. Morgan, please marry me. We belong together.”
“No, we don’t.” She pushed futilely at his rock-hard chest. “I meant what I said in my text message. It won’t work between us.”
“It worked really well the other night.” He fitted his pelvis to hers. “I’ll bet it could work well tonight, too. And don’t think teddy bears will make a difference. I’d want you no matter what you wear.”
She could tell that. He was ready to rock and roll, and naturally, once she was in his arms, so was she. But another romp in her bed would only make things worse for both of them.
Cupping his face in her hands, she looked into those blue, blue eyes. “Listen to me. You’re part of a legacy. What you need is a ranch wife who doesn’t mind sending you off to compete while she raises the grandchildren your mother so desperately wants.”
“Nick can be in charge of producing kids.”
She shook her head. “Not just Nick. All of you. You’re destined to carry on the Chance name, and I understand that. But when it comes to women suited to marry the Chance boys, I don’t fit the mold. I don’t want to be a disappointment to your mother, but mostly, I don’t want to be a disappointment to you.”
“You couldn’t be.”
“Oh, yes, I could.” Her heart ached, but this had to be said. “Not at first, when the sex is great and I can travel a little bit with you. But we can only be newlyweds for so long before everyone starts asking ‘what’s next?’ The obvious answer is children.”
His jaw tightened. “If you don’t want them, then we won’t have any.”
“Be honest with yourself. You were envious of Nick and Dominique when they were planning their house. How will you feel when they have a baby? And your mom gets all weepy and happy about it?”
Uncertainty danced in his eyes. “You could change your mind.”
She wanted to keep that feeling of uncertainty alive, for his sake. “Maybe I’ll change my mind, but this is a big issue, Gabe. We can’t base a life on the possibility that I’ll get excited about having kids. I might not. Look, neither of us went into this with plans for a future together. Don’t force it. Let me go.”
The pain in his expression nearly toppled her resolve. “I don’t want to.”
“And I don’t want to keep this up. I…I’m starting to care for you.” She didn’t have the courage to use the L-word at this point in time. “If we’re headed down a dead-end street, then we need to turn back now, before we crash.”
He swallowed. “Morgan…”
“You know I’m right. Just go. Go now, before we hurt each other any more. I’m not the person you need.”
“And you don’t want to be.”
This was the hard part. “No, I don’t.” She longed to close her eyes and block out his tortured gaze, but that wouldn’t be fair. Flinching would indicate she wasn’t sure. And she was. She was.
“All right, then.” Releasing her, he turned toward the door. “But I still think you’re my Doozie.”
“You got the goat okay?”
“Yeah. Doozie was overjoyed to see him.” Gabe opened the door and walked out, dejection and defeat in every line of his body.
She pressed her lips together to keep from calling him back. But she loved him too much to hand out false hope. Someday he’d find a woman better suited to him, and then he’d thank Morgan for sending him away tonight.
If only she could take more comfort in that.
GABE DIDN’T REMEMBER much about the drive home. He sat in the circular driveway for a while, trying to summon the energy to go inside, but everything seemed so pointless now. Unfortunately he understood exactly what Morgan was talking about, and she was right.
He could see himself marrying her with the promise that he didn’t care about kids, just so he could satisfy this driving need to be with her. But he did care about kids, and he’d marry her with the secret wish that she’d change. If she didn’t…they’d be in trouble.
Slamming his hands against the truck’s steering wheel, he cursed Morgan’s parents for souring her on the concept of having children. Not much could be done about that now, though. He might as well get on with his life.
When he went inside, he noticed that someone had left a lamp burning in the living room. Probably his mother, so he wouldn’t stumble around in the dark. He walked over to turn it off before going upstairs.
Jack’s voice startled him. “Did you drive into town to see Morgan?”
He looked over and found his big brother in one of the leather easy chairs that circled a round coffee table in front of the fireplace. A bottle of whiskey sat on an end table beside him and he held a shot glass in his hand. Gabe wasn’t in the mood to listen to another of Jack’s tirades on the subject of Morgan. He started to leave the room.
“I was wrong about her,” Jack said.
Gabe paused and waited for trumpets to herald this miracle—Jack admitting he’d made an error in judgment.
“Don’t look so shocked.” Jack drained his shot glass and set it on the table next to the bottle. “I’ve been wrong once or twice in my life.”
“I’m aware of that. I just never expected you to say so.”
“Yeah, well…get ready, because here comes another one. I was wrong about paying for your competition, too. I was forgetting something major. It makes Sarah happy to know you’re out there using the skills Dad taught you. That’s worth whatever it costs, and if you help sell a few horses in the process, so much the better.”
“Okay.” At the moment, Gabe didn’t give a shit about riding in competitions, but he wasn’t going to say that.
“You might actually get Top Drawer into the Hall of Fame, which would be a bonus. Besides, you’re a tax write-off.”
“Woo-hoo.” Gabe made a circle in the air with his finger.
“Do you understand me? I’m saying you’re clear to get back out there.”
“Great.” He couldn’t believe how little that meant compared to losing Morgan. He should be grateful, though, because competing would provide a way to take his mind off her.
“You don’t sound very happy about it. Is something wrong? I mean, you’re home kinda early. Is Morgan sick or something?”
“No. It’s…it’s over. We’re done.”
Jack let loose with a string of colorful swear words.
“It’s my fault, isn’t it? For being such an a-hole.”
“No, it’s not your fault. Everything doesn’t have to be about you, Jack.”
He shrugged. “If you say so. Then what’s the problem?”
“I really don’t want to talk about—”
“Aw, hell, Gabe. Who else you got to bounce things off of? Nick’s sailing around on cloud nine, so you don’t want to lay this on him. That leaves me and Sarah, and it’s dangerous to give your mother too much information.”
Gabe couldn’t help laughing at the truth of that. And in that instant, he was transported back to a happier time when Jack had been the go-to guy for problems with women. Both Gabe and Nick had depended on Jack’s worldly knowledge to get them through the maze of male-female relationships.
Except Jack hadn’t done so well in that department himself. He’d walked away from a wonderful woman and Gabe figured Josie was still hurting over it. She wasn’t dating anyone else, either.
Jack waved a hand toward the chair next to him. “You’re not gonna sleep, so you might as well sit here instead of pacing around in your room.”
With a sigh of resignation, Gabe sank down on the smooth leather of the chair next to Jack’s.
“Want a drink?”
Gabe shook his head.
“So why’d she dump you?”
“Who says she dumped me?”
“It’s not rocket science, little brother. You look like you’ve been tromped on by a bull.”
“After raising her brothers and sisters, she’s sick of the whole kid thing. She may never want any of her own.”
“And you do?”
Gabe scrubbed a hand over his face. “Yeah. Someday. I tried to convince myself it didn’t matter, but she was smarter than that. She knew it would matter sooner or later.”
“Points for the lady.”
“I know. It’s just that…I think she’s the one for me.”
“So you’re in love with her.”
Gabe had been avoiding admitting that to himself, because it would make everything worse. “Yeah. Good thing I didn’t tell her that.”
“Good thing? Are you insane? You asked her to marry you and didn’t say you loved her first?”
“I thought she’d figure that out.”
“Dear God.” Jack shook his head. “You’re even dumber than I thought.”
“Don’t go calling me dumb. At least I proposed. You’re the wiseass who walked away from the best thing that ever happened to you.”
Jack stared at him in silence before taking a deep breath. “Could be. But that can’t be fixed anytime soon. You, on the other hand, need to strike while the iron is hot.”
“Forget it. She sent me packing.”
“Doesn’t matter. You have two problems to overcome.” Jack held up his forefinger. “One, you made a serious tactical error in not declaring your love. We can fix that.” He held up his middle finger. “Two, she doesn’t want kids. But from what Sarah told me about her, she—”
“You talked to Mom about her?”
“Sarah talked to me. Called me on the carpet, actually. We got a few things straightened out. But your lady’s family moved all over God’s creation while the kids were young, right?”
“Uh-huh, which is why she’s so determined to stay in Shoshone forever.”
“There you go. When she was dealing with her sisters and brothers, I’m betting the family was isolated. No grandparents, aunties or uncles around to help out.”
Gabe thought about that. “Sounds right.”
“But at the Last Chance, there’s Sarah, Mary Lou, Emmett, the other cowhands, Pam, Nick and Dominique, even Jack the hard-ass. Around here, a kid’s feet will never touch the ground!”
“You’re right.” For the first time since leaving Morgan’s house, Gabe saw a glimmer of hope. “You think she’ll buy that?”
“One way to find out.” Jack stood. “Let’s go.”
“Go where?”
“To Morgan’s house. You drive. I’ve had a few.”
MORGAN SAT UP in bed, pounded the pillow into shape and flopped down again. She had two appointments in the morning and another one in the afternoon. If she didn’t get to sleep soon, she’d have a tough time being perky.
That would be bad. She counted on perky. It was one of her selling tools. But this whole miserable situation with Gabe had sucked out all her perky.
Not her adrenaline, though. When the doorbell rang, she leaped out of bed as if she’d been shot from a cannon and stood in the middle of her dark bedroom gulping for air.
It had to be Gabe, but she simply couldn’t face him again. Opening that door would send her right back into his arms, and she wasn’t going there. She was tough, but not that tough.
Of course Gabe wasn’t the kind to give up, so the doorbell kept ringing…and ringing…
Finally she couldn’t take it anymore. She walked into the living room but didn’t turn on any lights. Consequently she stubbed her toe on the leg of the sofa as she made her way to a double-hung window at the front of the house. She swore under her breath as she hobbled to the window, which she’d left partway open with the security latch on.
Crouching down, she pulled aside the curtains and called out through the opening at the bottom of the window. “Go away!”
“Morgan, it’s Jack.”
Jack? She raced to unlock the door. “Is Gabe okay?” Then she saw both of them standing on her small porch. She’d have to be dead not to appreciate the sight they presented in their boots, bun-hugging jeans, fitted shirts and Stetsons cocked at a jaunty angle.
Still, she had her priorities. “You scared me half to death. Now go away.” She started to close the door.
“I think you have termites,” Jack said.
“What?”
“Termites.” He elbowed Gabe in the ribs.
Morgan sighed. “I get it. You’re making stuff up to keep me from closing the door. Goodnight, boys.”
“No, seriously! Feels spongy.” Jack jumped up and down and the boards squeaked. “Hear that?” He elbowed Gabe a second time.
“Look, I don’t know what you’re up to, but—”
“For God’s sake, Gabe!” Jack shoved him forward.
“Say it!”
Gabe swallowed. “Morgan, I love you.”
That cowboy sure knew how to deliver a sucker punch. She got chills followed by a warm, sweet feeling spreading through her like rivers of hot fudge. She still couldn’t marry him, but she’d never forget this moment.
She took a shaky breath. “That’s…that’s nice to hear.”
Jack clapped his brother on the shoulder. “But that’s not all, is it, Gabe?”
“No, it’s not.” Gabe focused those blue eyes directly on her. “I should have told you that first, before I brought up the whole marriage-and-babies subject, before I said you were my Doozie. I—”
“Hold it.” Jack hooked an arm around Gabe’s shoulders and drew him aside. “This enterprise is running off the rails. Doozie? What in hell does your lame horse have to do with anything?”
“We belong together, just like Doozie and Hornswaggled, except I didn’t think Morgan would want to be compared to a goat, plus she’s a woman, and Doozie’s a mare, so—”
“Good night, Irene.” Jack glanced over at Morgan.
“Could you excuse us for a sec?”
“Sure.” Morgan watched as the two brothers put their heads together, their voices hushed but intense. Meanwhile her resolve was melting faster than an ice cube in a microwave. How was she supposed to resist a campaign like this, where Gabe’s earnest but slightly goofy appeal was being coached by his older brother? She’d never seen anything so endearing in her life.
But if she caved, could she be the wife Gabe needed? That was the sticking point. Yet how she loved the man. She loved him even more for stumbling through this when he probably expected total rejection. He’d made himself so vulnerable.
He and Jack must have settled on a strategy, because they came out of their huddle and walked toward her again. Gabe took off his hat and mopped his forehead with his sleeve. If she’d ever doubted that he was fully engaged in this struggle, she doubted it no longer.
He put on his hat and stood before her, his legs spread a little as if he were bracing for what might come. “About the kid thing.”
“It’s still an issue, Gabe.” She owed him the truth.
“I know, but—”
“Uncle Jack, standing by.” Jack balanced on his toes and waved at her.
Gabe turned to him. “I’m handling it, Jack.”
“Just making sure you stay on track, bro.”
“I know what to say, so butt out.” Gabe faced her again. “I’m not putting pressure on you, Morgan.”
She nodded. “Good.” Because the least little pressure would send her into his arms.
“But I want you to consider something. When you were responsible for all those kids, you had no other relatives to lighten the load.”
“No. We were always on the move.”
“Exactly. But as Jack pointed out to me, our kid would have tons of people—my mom, Mary Lou, Nick and Dominique, Emmett, Pam and Jack, believe it or not. Even the cowhands would want to take a turn. You’d have babysitters coming out your ears.”
“The kid’s feet will never touch the ground!” Jack chortled.
“Our kid.” Morgan said it softly, almost afraid to imagine it, but…suddenly the idea wasn’t some abstract concept that she could easily reject. He was discussing a baby who would have his hair and eyes, or her hair and eyes, or his hair and her eyes. Their kid.
“You probably need some time to think about it.” His gaze was tender, filled with the love he’d so recently declared.
“Don’t give her time to think, idiot!” Jack waved both arms in the air. “Can’t you see she’s waffling? Close the deal!”
Morgan stepped forward. “I’ll close the deal. I love you, Gabriel Archibald Chance. Let’s get married and have a baby who will torture Uncle Jack.”
Gabe’s smile lit up the darkness. “Yeah, let’s.” He pulled her into his arms. “I vote we celebrate that decision.”
“Hey!” Jack called out. “Don’t forget about me! I need to go home, y’know. And I shouldn’t be driving.”
“Then go knock on Josie’s door,” Gabe said.
Morgan had no idea how Jack responded to that suggestion, because Gabe had maneuvered her into the house by then and had started on the buttons of her teddy-bear flannels.
“Did I tell you how much I love teddy bears?” he murmured in her ear.
“No.” She tugged him into her bedroom.
“Not nearly as much as I love you.” And with that, they tumbled onto the mattress.
After a lifetime of wandering, Morgan finally knew where she belonged—here in Gabe’s arms. Someday, when the time was right, their lovemaking would create a Last Chance baby. And the kid’s feet would never touch the ground.