Thanks to the unexpected setback, I rushed down the aisles at the supermarket, grabbing only what I needed and fleeing again. Back in the car, I put on some soul music, letting the mellow beat calm me. I refused to let Lola intrude on my night.
I grabbed my grocery bag off the passenger seat and climbed out. Casper and Shadow greeted me, and all was right in my world. After lots of smooches and cuddles, I washed my hands and put on my proverbial apron.
I didn’t own an actual apron, but I had all the ingredients I needed to make a kumara, bacon, and leek pie. I recalled Deanna saying she couldn’t get enough of kumara fries, and I knew she loved bacon, so I hoped she approved. Once it was in the oven, I showered and changed into a pair of slacks and a long-sleeved top. My red highlights shimmered in the light, and my hair rested on my shoulders.
When a knock on the door sounded, my heart skipped a beat. Not because I got a fright, but because I was excited to see Deanna. It felt like it had been forever, yet it’d been less than eight hours. Admittedly, a lot had happened within that time, a great deal of which I didn’t want to talk about.
I opened the door and was greeted by a beatific smile and a bunch of flowers. Blown away by the gesture, I wasn’t sure whether to jump for joy or burst into tears. No one had ever given me flowers.
Deanna held out the bouquet. “For you.”
“Thank you.” I breathed in the rose and eucalyptus arrangement. “It’s gorgeous.”
“As are you.”
“Stop it! You’ll make me blush.” I chuckled to hide the truth of my words. This dating thing was so far out of my league, I was like a shy virgin. Scratch that. I hadn’t blushed when I lost my virginity. I’d been too wasted.
“Come in.” I stepped aside. Deanna entered and closed the door behind her. She wore faded blue jeans and a cable-knit grey jersey. Her red hair was up in a messy bun, and her hazel eyes sparkled.
“It’s not too warm in here, is it?” It had been a cold July, and despite the hike in my power bill, I refused to freeze.
“Not at all. And if it gets that way, I’ll take off my jersey.”
I grabbed the remote and pretended to turn up the heat.
“I see your mind’s in your knickers again.”
I spun Deanna in the tall chair she’d taken at the breakfast bar and stepped between her legs. “Being near you has my mind going there. You’re so fucking beautiful, and kind, and sexy, and thoughtful, and ravishing, and—”
“Okay, okay!” Deanna chuckled. “I get it.”
I cupped her face. “I care about you. A lot.”
“I know.” She looked away like she’d didn’t quite believe me.
“I mean it. And that’s both thrilling and terrifying.”
She let out a nervous chuckle. “It is, isn’t it? But you know we can never live together, right?”
Relief swept through me. “Who said anything about living together? One sleepover does not make a marriage.”
Her eyes bugged out. “Who said anything about marriage?”
“Exactly.”
Sometime during our exchange, Shadow made an appearance. He wove through my legs and around the barstool.
“Where’s Casper?” Deanna asked.
“Hiding.” I opened the cupboard and tossed her a pouch of cat food. “Feel free to do the honours.”
She crinkled the packet, and a white face peered at us around the corner. Deanna shot me a grin and slid off the chair. “Hello, sweetheart.”
“Hello,” I said in a childlike voice.
“Not you.” She shoved my leg.
The oven timer dinged, and I cursed the stupid timer. When Casper didn’t bolt, I exhaled a relieved breath. After a little more cooing, Casper took a tentative sniff of Deanna, surprising me further when she let Deanna pick her up.
“Hello.” Deanna stroked her fur. “Aren’t you a pretty girl?”
Leaving Deanna to feed the cats, I grabbed the oven mitts and put the pie on a cooling rack.
“Something smells good.”
I almost jumped out of my knickers when Deanna came up behind me. “Shit, don’t do that.” I clutched my chest. “I nearly peed myself.”
“Then you need to do more Kegel exercises.”
“Is that right?” I stopped short of reminding her that my inner muscles were strong enough to grip the bulbous end of a Feeldoe. Why give her another reason to accuse me of having a one-track mind? “I hope you like leeks.”
“Is that a euphemism for something?”
“Now who’s got their mind in their knickers?”
“I guess you’re rubbing off on me.”
“I wish.” God, I was hopeless. I cleared my throat and tried again, spelling out the word. “Leeks. L-EE-K.”
“Ah, right, the vegetable. Yep, love them.”
“Good. Then you’ll like my pie. Leek, bacon, and kumara.”
Deanna clutched my hand, swooning like a prima donna. “Marry me now. I want you to have my babies and teach them how to make pie.”
I laughed at her antics. “How many babies do you want?” As soon as the question left my mouth, my heart leapt into my throat. Did Deanna want kids? Me, no way. One could say I’d missed that bus and never looked back.
“Ah, that would be none.” She sobered as if suddenly realising the significance of her words. “How about you?”
“I accept your none and raise you none.”
“Nice pun.”
Unsure what I’d missed, I mulled over the words, still not seeing it. No matter how many ways I looked at it, none and none was still none. “I don’t get it.”
“Raise you none. No kids to raise.”
“I need a drink.” I bypassed the bottle of red I’d corked earlier and retrieved a bourbon and Coke out of the fridge for Deanna. “I hope you don’t mind RTDs.” There’d been about six different options in the ready-to-drink section, and I had no idea what brand of bourbon Deanna drank or if all bourbons were created equal.
She eyed up the label. “You got the strong stuff.”
“Did I?” I hadn’t even looked at the alcohol content.
“Yep, most are five per cent. These babies are eight per cent.”
“Lucky we have something to soak up the booze.” I pointed at dinner. “We can eat now or relax with a drink first.” A third option hit me. “Or we could do both. Eat and drink.”
“Will the pie be okay for half an hour?”
“The pie will be even better in half an hour.” It wouldn’t burn the roof of my mouth. “Let’s get comfy.” I led the way into the living room.
Rather than sit, Deanna eyed up my shelf of CDs by the stereo. I’d had them since I first started dancing, and I refused to part with them.
She ran her fingers along the spines. “ZZ Top fan?”
A pang of nostalgia hit me. “Yeah. I used to love dancing to some of their songs.”
“When you were a stripper?”
“Yeah.”
Deanna raised an eyebrow. “No bad memories?”
“Plenty of those. But lots of good ones too.” Before she could ask more, I took the CD out of her hand and popped it in the player.
“You do realise you have to dance for me now?”
Grateful Deanna hadn’t tried to dig into my past, I was all too happy to perform for her. It had been a long time since I’d been on stage, but the same high I used to feel zinged through my veins.
I dimmed the lights and changed the track to ‘Gimme All Your Lovin’’. I swayed my body to the beat, basking in the rapt attention of my audience of one.
Deanna leaned forward on the sofa, elbows on her knees. I turned my back to her and swung my hips, then spun around again, grabbing her hands and putting them on my waist.
I inched my shirt up and tossed it on the floor, then nodded for her to undo my jeans. Without hesitation, Deanna did my bidding. I stepped out of my pants and flung them across the room, loving it when she rocked back on the sofa, laughing and covering her face as if she was shy.
I pranced over to her, walking on my toes. Her eyes blazed with heat, but instead of straddling her lap, I beckoned her forward. Deanna got to her feet. I ran a finger down her cheek, flipped my hair over my shoulder, and spun in a circle.
“Breathe,” I said as I danced a slow circle around her.
Deanna followed me with her eyes, turning her head as far as she could to the right then flicking around to the left as I appeared on her other side.
I took her hands again and put them on my hips and dirty-danced with her, gyrating my lower body against her.
The song ended, and a charged silence crackled between us. With my gaze on Deanna, I took a step back, crossed my legs at the ankles and bowed. “Thank you, ma’am. You may return to your seat now.”
“What if I don’t want to?” She said it with enough sass to get my blood pumping, and I was already amped.
I held her gaze. “Are you being sassy?”
“No, Mistress. But I’m all hot and bothered. And you said if it got too hot, I could take some clothes off.”
It was actually Dee who’d said something along those lines, but I didn’t care. If she was ready to get naked, I was all for it. After all, it only seemed fair since I was standing there in my underwear.
“Tell me what you want.”
Deanna clasped her hands behind her back, chest thrust forward. “I want to play, Mistress S.”
Hearing her call me Mistress S made my clit throb, but there was a small problem. “I don’t have any props. We’ll have to improvise, okay?”
“Really?” Surprise registered in Deanna’s voice.
“Really. I don’t bring women home.”
“Really?” she said again, sounding equally as surprised.
“No, Dee. I don’t have a harem of women.”
“I assumed that was why you didn’t date. You liked to keep your options open, so to speak.”
I hated that she thought that, and I hated the look in her eye. It was something between curious and vulnerable. But not sexually vulnerable. Emotionally vulnerable. It made me want to wrap her in my arms and keep her safe. “I’ve never brought anyone home with me. Not until you.”
“Wow. I’m honoured.”
“You’re special.” I kissed her softly.
“So are you.”
“Are you sure you want this?”
“Positive.”
I took her hand and led her to the bedroom. Shadow got a short, sharp shift when he followed us in and jumped up on the bed. “Go find your sister.” I deposited him in the hallway and shut the door.
Our gazes locked, and the look of need in Dee’s eyes immediately had me slipping into the role she craved—the role of dominant. “Strip,” I commanded.
“Yes, Mistress.”
Torn between figuring out what to use as restraints and basking in the sight of Dee, I flicked my gaze between my top drawer and every inch of Dee’s flesh as it was exposed.
Once she was fully naked, I pointed to my bed. “On your back. Spreadeagle.”
She complied, and I took a minute to admire her beauty—perky breasts, erect nipples, the curve of her waist, toned thighs, and the patch of red curls beckoning me to see what lay beneath. I knew what was there, but I was yet to taste her.
I hated doing this, but I had to ask. “Have you been tested lately?”
“Not since the last time, and I haven’t slept with anyone since I met you.”
That both shocked and thrilled me. “You haven’t had sex with anyone else for three years?”
“Why is that so hard to believe?”
“I don’t know. I guess for the same reason you assumed I had a harem of women.”
“Why is that?” Deanna gave me a coy smile. “I mean, why do we make assumptions about each other?”
My reply came without thought. “Because we’re both hot and have to fight off hordes of women falling all over us.”
Deanna laughed. “I wouldn’t go that far, but I like your logic, and it’s good to know you’re playing things safe.”
“I always play things safe.”
“I know,” Deanna said softly. “And I trust you.”
I dusted off my hands and shook out my fingers. “That was unpleasant but necessary.”
“True. Take me someplace nice.”
“Gladly.” I stood at the end of the bed, admiring her form. “You’re gorgeous.”
“Thank you.”
I retrieved a scarf out of my dresser drawer and approached the head of the bed. “Up.”
With nothing but lust shining in her eyes, Deanna sat up. I pulled the hair tie out, letting her red curls tumble free before covering her eyes with the scarf and securing it behind her head. While she was still upright, I tugged on a nipple, delighted when Deanna sucked in a breath.
I guided her back until her head hit the pillow. “Spread your arms and legs.”
She obeyed, and once again, she was spreadeagled before me, waiting and wanting.
“Touch me without permission, and all play stops. Close your legs without permission, and all play stops.”
“Yes, Mistress S.”
“Safe word?”
“Mango.”
“Good girl.” I ducked out of the room, grabbed two clothes pegs and was back in seconds. Aware her hearing would be heightened with her sight removed, I slowly walked from one side of the bed to the other, letting the anticipation build. I pictured Deanna’s hazel eyes moving behind the blindfold, trying to figure out where I was and what I was doing.
I stood stock-still, admiring the rise and fall of her chest. Once her breathing slowed, I moved in, clamping a peg on the nipple closest to me.
“Ah.” She hissed out a breath, body tensing. Once she relaxed, I attached the other peg. Deanna reacted the same, a sharp intake of breath, muscles tensing before relaxing.
Although we’d played together for a number of years now, I still liked to check in. “You okay?”
“Perfectly.”
I opened my wardrobe and retrieved a leather belt. Using the belt like the tip of a tongue, I dragged it over her mound, along her torso, and swirled it around her areola. Deanna let out a soft whimper, making my clit throb. Her arousal fuelled mine. I hadn’t laid a finger on her, and I was slick with heat.
I lowered my head for a kiss. She jumped when I made contact, then relaxed, opening her mouth and inviting me in. Our tongues duelled, and I smiled into the kiss. I wanted to lavish attention on every inch of her body. To worship her like she’d done to me so many times, and I intended to do that in the way she loved.
I pulled on the clothes peg until her back arched and she hissed again. “You’ve been such a good girl, I’m going to reward you.” I released my grip on the pegs. “Remember the rules?”
“Yes. No touching or moving without permission.” She lay perfectly still, ready for the taking.
I slid onto the bed and positioned myself between her legs. Her pussy was pink and swollen. I traced a finger along the seam of her glistening folds. Her back arched, and I circled her clit with the tip of my finger. She bucked her hips, grasping at thin air, which had to be its own kind of torture.
“Let me see. Should I fuck you or taste you?” The question was directed at myself, so I wasn’t surprised when she didn’t reply. The decision wasn’t hard. I wanted to do both, and I intended to do both. Simultaneously. I entered her slowly, loving the tight, wet heat that engulfed my fingers.
Dee gasped when I sucked her clit between my lips. “Oh, Goddess.”
Even though I didn’t think of myself as any kind of deity, I liked the sound of those words coming from Dee’s lips. The intimacy of the moment robbed me of breath, and getting my first taste of Dee after three years was intoxicating. Without breaking the suction of my mouth, I slid another finger inside. Dee’s hips undulated.
“So wet.”
“Yes, Mistress. Only for you.”
The words wrapped around me, and I basked in the moment, refusing to listen to the tiny part of my brain telling me we were both playing a role. This felt different than all the other times we’d played. It was different. It wasn’t a business arrangement.
I focused all of my attention on my willing captive. The thatch of curls covering her mound tickled my nose, and her arousal coated my fingers. I flicked my tongue across her clit and pumped my fingers until she was writhing and moaning. “Do you want to come?”
“Yes, please. Please make me come.”
“Take off the nipple clamps.”
“Permission to move, Mistress.”
Charmed she’d asked, even though I’d more or less given her permission, I gave my consent. “Permission granted.”
With my fingers still buried deep inside, I massaged Dee’s G-spot, watching her face as the pegs came off. She squeezed the pincers and released both at the same time. I marvelled at her desire to take the double hit of pain. Her nipples went from white to pink as blood flow returned.
Knowing they would be extremely sensitive, I instructed her to play with them. “Roll your nipples.”
“Yes, Mistress.” She moaned softly. “I’m so close.” Her thighs tensed, and her inner muscles flexed around my fingers. I lowered my head and wrapped my lips around her clit, grazing it with my teeth.
Within seconds, her thighs trembled around my shoulders and her walls clamped down on my fingers, squeezing and releasing as she rode out her orgasm. I eased up until her breathing slowed and her body went lax, then I upped the tempo, pumping in and out of her. “Again.”
“Oh, Mistress. I…I can’t.”
I didn’t stop. “You can.”
Despite Dee’s protests, it wasn’t long before another orgasm thundered through her. This time she cried out, hands fisting the duvet.
As Dee caught her breath, I kissed a path up her body and nuzzled her neck. “You’re beautiful when you come.”
“Thank you, Mistress.” I pulled off the blindfold and met her gaze. The lust shining back at me made my breath hitch. Her next words almost made me come on the spot.
“Please may I taste you?”
“I thought you’d never ask.”
When she didn’t move, I took the initiative. My body was on fire, and it wouldn’t take long. I straddled her face, then paused, looking down at her. When I saw nothing but desire and trust shining back at me, I lowered myself until I was within reach. Her tongue snaked out, and I reared up on my knees, pulling away from her.
“Tease.”
Her beautiful smile added fuel to the embers burning within me. I was a raging inferno of desire, unable to deny either of us for a second longer. I slid a hand under her head as I lowered myself to her face. The first touch of her tongue was electric. Sparks of heat licked at my body, setting nerve endings on fire.
When her hands came up and rested on my hips, I didn’t reprimand her. I was too far gone. I also wanted Dee to come again right along with me. I leaned back and reached a hand between her thighs. She sucked in a sharp breath, her ribcage rising and falling beneath me.
With my finger on her clit, I matched every swipe and swirl of her tongue. We were both wet and breathing hard. My orgasm built and built and built. I held off, hovering on the precipice until I felt Dee tremble, and over we both went, freefalling into euphoria.
Once I caught my breath, I toppled off Dee and slid off the bed. “I’ll be right back.” I ducked into the bathroom, grabbed a hot washcloth, and was back within seconds. Shadow came rushing into the room. He jumped onto the bed and sniffed Dee’s sweating body.
“Off you go.” I pushed him away.
“Meanie,” Dee said.
Ignoring the jibe, I gently and methodically wiped the sweat off her body.
She exhaled a contented sigh. “I take that back. That feels wonderful.”
“So are you.” I pulled the blankets up from the end of the bed and snuggled up beside her. I didn’t want Deanna to get a chill along with the endorphin drop.
Shadow jumped up onto the bed again, and this time I didn’t bother pushing him off. Not long after, Casper joined us. For a minute, we lay there, enjoying the peaceful moment and listening to the purr of the cats.
“Why do you think that is?” Deanna asked.
I nuzzled her neck. “What?”
“Some cats purr louder than others.”
“Guess it depends how you stroke them.”
Deanna shook her head. “You haven’t even got any underwear on and your mind’s in your knickers.”
“Hey, who said I was referring to sex?”
“Tell me you weren’t.”
She had me there. “From the little I know, breed can play a part in how loud a cat purrs.”
“Really?” She narrowed her eyes.
“Really.”
The rumble of Deanna’s stomach reminded me we were yet to eat. “Come on. There’s pie to eat.”
Unable to recall ever feeling so content, we ate in relative silence. I kept stealing sly glances at my lover, and just when I thought the night couldn’t get any better, Deanna went and pulled the rug out from under my feet.
“I should get going.”
“What?” My heart sank all the way to my toes. Not wanting to guilt her into anything, I dragged it back up. “I mean sure. Whatever you want.”
“Don’t be like that.”
I didn’t bother asking what. Deanna had heard the vulnerability in my voice. “Sorry. I told you I’m out of my depth. I’d like to say it’s just sex, but it’s more than that.” I cupped her cheek. “I’m falling in love with you, and that scares the shit out of me.”
“I’m falling for you too. And that scares the piss out of me.”
We laughed, and I loved how we complemented each other, knowing the right thing to say when the other was feeling insecure.
“I wish I could stay longer, but Harley needs me, and you’ve got work tomorrow.”
“Ugh, don’t remind me.”
Deanna cocked her head. “I thought you loved your job.”
“I do.”
“But?”
“I kinda suspended someone.”
“Like, from a spreader bar?” Deanna’s smile was playful.
“Like an employee.”
“Oh, no. That sounds bad. What did she do?”
“Tossed racial slurs at a fellow employee.”
“Ugh, that sucks.”
“It does, and it breaks company policy. We have zero tolerance for discrimination.”
Deanna leaned against the kitchen bench, arms folded across her chest, legs crossed at the ankles. “The thing is, you can have as many policies in place as you like. Staff sign them, but it doesn’t mean they’ll adhere to the rules. Look at Caroline.”
“I’d rather not.” In fact, I hoped I never set eyes on the woman again. The fact she was working undercover somewhere in the South Island guaranteed that for the next six months. “Does your workplace know Caroline has it in for the gay community?”
“No. Caroline’s an undercover cop. Her skill is deception and covering her arse.”
“Have you ever gone to a superior about her treatment of you?”
“Nope. I won’t give her the satisfaction. She can bark as loud and angry as she likes, but I refuse to bite.”
“You were pretty close to biting at the ball.” An image of a soccer ball came to mind. “That sounded wrong.”
“It did, but I’m smart enough to know what you meant.” Deanna stood. “Thanks for a wonderful evening.”
A wave of sadness hit me. I already missed her, and she was yet to leave. Not wanting to look like a spoilt brat trying to get my way, I plastered on a smile. “I’ll see you out.”
“Thank you.”
We stood by the door, staring at each other. I felt Deanna’s reluctance to leave, and that gave me a small measure of comfort. “I hate goodbyes.”
“It’s not goodbye. It’s farewell for now.” A gorgeous smile lit up her eyes along with my heart.
“Until next time.” I kissed her softly.
“Until next time.” With one last flash of that smile that hit me in the solar plexus every time, she was gone. And to be honest, I was a goner too.