20

ETHAN

It’s been a year since I’ve seen Vada in the flesh, but she’s just as stunningly beautiful as I remember. Her hair is a tad longer, but thick and just as gorgeous as before. Seeing her in a dress instantly starts doing things to me, but when I see the expression on her face the moment her eyes find mine, I know the feelings I had for her haven’t wavered a bit.

Coming here was a risk. After sending her forty-five flower bouquets and never getting a response from her, I didn’t know if she’d want to see me or not. However, when I heard she would be in Charleston, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to know once and for all if we still had a chance at making this work.

I haven’t stopped thinking about her since she left. I’ve been a tortured soul since the moment she walked out of my life, and I haven’t even looked at another woman since she’s been gone. This was my last attempt to lay it all out there on the line.

“Ethan,” she says, her tone soft, as she walks toward me. I see the surprise in her eyes and hope I’m not breaking the rules by coming here.

“Hey.” I meet her halfway, unsure how to approach her. I try to read her body language, but she isn’t giving much away.

“You’re here,” she says simply, almost as if she’d been anticipating seeing me, which makes me hopeful. She releases a breath, and I wonder if it’d be appropriate to hug her.

“Of course, I am,” is all I say in return.

“I’m just surprised to see you here. I just got the feeling you were done waiting.” I don’t miss the hint of sadness in her tone.

I take another step toward her. “Oh fuck no.”

My blunt words take her off guard, but she chuckles softly anyway.

“I wasn’t sure I’d ever see you again.”

“I wasn’t sure you’d ever want to see me again,” I admit. “After everything that happened with Harmony and your writing deadlines, but seeing as you didn’t slap me across the face, I take it you don’t hate me.” I rock back on my feet, nervously.

She smiles, lowering her eyes to hide the blush that sweeps across her cheeks. “Well, I actually decided to stop hating you yesterday. So, good timing.”

“Whew, glad I waited.”

We both smile.

“So…what are you doing here, Ethan?” She sucks in her lower lip as she studies me.

“I came to see if you got my flowers,” I tease, knowing damn well she did. I paid good money to make sure they were delivered directly to her.

“Um, ya know…I’m pretty sure I did.” She puts a finger to her lips as if she’s truly thinking about it.

I narrow my eyes, but she cracks a smile, giving me the reassurance I need.

“Of course, I did,” she finally confesses. “They were all really gorgeous,” she says sincerely, and the nerves begin to wash away. “However, it was quite ironic, don’t you think?” Her lips tilt up in a mock grin.

“Why do you say that?” I narrow my eyes.

“I recall you specifically telling me you weren’t a ‘sending flowers’ type of guy.” She flashes a wide smile, knowing damn well she’s right. “And yet, you sent me a bouquet every week for almost a year.”

I run my hand along my jawline, covering up the guilty smirk that flashes across my face. “To be fair, I hadn’t been that guy for years, so I didn’t want you to have the wrong expectations.” I pause, keeping my eyes locked on hers. “But meeting you changed everything.”

“Well, thank you. I loved them all.”

“You’re welcome.” I smile in return. “I wanted to make sure you always had fresh flowers to keep you inspired. I would’ve sent Henry, knowing how much you enjoyed his company, but I was worried you’d send him back in a bucket.”

She bursts out laughing, and it eases everything inside me.

“I can honestly say I don’t miss your cock chasing me.” She pinches her lips together, preventing her from smiling.

“Well, that’s really a shame, because he’s sure missed you,” I tell her sincerely.

“I bet he’s had plenty of other visitors to attack.”

Lowering my eyes, I shake my head. “I haven’t rented the cottage out since you left.”

“Oh.” Her voice sounds surprised, although she really shouldn’t be. I haven’t wanted anyone else in there. To me, it’ll always be hers.

Clearing my throat, I work up the courage to tell her why I’m really here. “I came for you, Vada.” I look into her big green eyes. “I haven’t stopped thinking about you. I couldn’t miss the opportunity to finally see you.”

She bites on her lower lip before popping it back out. “How’d you know I’d be in town?”

“Aunt Millie saw it in the paper and told me,” I confirm. “She’s your biggest fan now.” I smile. “Once I found out, I thought about this moment over and over and decided that even if you were pissed to see me, I had to chance it.”

She pauses a moment before smiling with a nod. “Well, I’m glad you did,” she replies, her words taking me by surprise. “I’ve wondered what it’d be like to see you again.”

“Yeah, it’s…” I pause, unable to stop looking at her lips and thinking about the way she tastes. Screw formalities. “Fuck, Vada. I’m sorry.” I step toward her.

“You don’t have to—” she begins, but I’m quick to cut her off.

“That’s not what I’m apologizing for.” I’m quick to close the gap between us, wrap my hand around her neck, and pull her lips to mine. I kiss the fuck out of her and am relieved when she kisses me back.

A risk—to assume she’d want to kiss me—but one so worth it.

Her tongue dances with mine as her hands wrap around my waist and pull at the fabric of my shirt, desperate to deepen the kiss. My palms cup her cheeks and hold her closely. The world spins around us as if we’re the only two people here, and in this moment, it’s only Vada and me.

“I’ve missed you so fucking much,” I breathe against her lips, leaning back just enough to whisper the words. “Did you miss me?” I bravely ask, needing to hear her say it.

She swallows then nods. “Yes, but

“But it’s not enough,” I finish for her, predicting her thoughts.

“We live completely different lives,” she confirms.

“That’s not a good enough reason to be apart, Vada.”

“You stopped sending the flowers,” she whispers. “I thought you were done waiting for me and the thought nearly sent me back to desperate levels.” I furrow my brows in question. “Wine,” she clarifies.

Brushing my finger along her jawline, I tilt her chin to look back up at me. “I stopped sending them because I knew you’d be on tour. I sent them because I wanted to give you the space and time, knowing you needed it, but without smothering you. I wanted you to know that I was still thinking about you and that I’d wait for you as long as you needed me to—as long as I knew there was still a chance for us.”

“Oh, I didn’t think of that,” she says, chewing on her lip again. I can see how nervous she is to be around me. “Harmony’s words really stung and affected me, and it made me really scared at how fast I was falling for you. Then I started second-guessing everything.”

“I’m so sorry about her. Everything she told you was based on lies, and I’m sorry she put them in your head, but I can’t undo that part of my life. As much as I wish I could.” I groan, getting fired up just thinking about her and the shit she pulled.

“I know, and I wanted to believe you once I finally listened to your messages, but it felt like it was too late. I’d already left heartbroken, and I knew I wouldn’t survive another broken heart if I called you back or even returned. It felt inevitable that things would eventually end, so I knew it was for the best to stay away.”

“How could you make that decision without actually talking to me first?” I ask, more anger in my tone than I’d meant. “You weren’t the only one hurting and confused, Vada.”

She swallows, her body tensing. “I know, but I felt like I couldn’t trust you even if what she told me was a lie. I couldn’t trust those feelings anymore, and I couldn’t go through the pain all over again.”

“I never lied to you, Vada. You had no reason not to trust me,” I tell her.

“I don’t trust easily,” she reminds me. “I didn’t know if the feelings I had for you were real either because they formed so fast. I’d hoped once I was back home and writing, I would get over you.”

“And did you?” I ask, brushing strands of her hair behind her ear, feeling the goose bumps along her skin.

Her body stills as she thinks about her answer. “No,” she says just above a whisper. “Not even close.” I bring her mouth back to mine, feverishly kissing her.

“Thank fuck,” I murmur against her lips. “I’ve been dying to kiss you for twelve long months. I was going to die if I had to hold back.”

She laughs against my mouth and the sound sends tingles down my body. Her laugh is music to my soul, and it’s the first true smile I’ve had in months.

“How inappropriate would it be to ask you to have dinner with me tonight?”

She chews her bottom lip as if she’s really thinking about it. “Depends. Are you going to offer your cock to me again?”

“Henry?” My brows lift. “I knew you missed him.” I smirk at all the memories of him chasing and scaring the shit out of her.

She chuckles again then shakes her head. “No, not that cock.”

I choke on my words before I can even spit them out. “Shit. You’re still as feisty as I remember.”

Her lips spread into a wide, knowing grin. “C’mon, Casanova. Take me to your lair.”

After Vada introduces her assistant to me and explains she’ll be riding with me, we take off in my car. The woman looked at me like I was a figment of her imagination.

“Are you sure you didn’t mean to say riding me instead?” Holding her hand as I drive back to my house, I press her knuckles to my lips as we fall right back into our old rhythm. “Or are you two not that close?” I flash her a cocky grin.

“Ha! Still as confident and arrogant as I remember.” She squeezes her hand in mine. “Quite the opposite actually. She probably knows more about me than I do. She takes care of my schedule and everything, down to what underwear I wear that day.”

“Really?” I arch a brow in her direction before sliding the material of her dress up her thigh and revealing red, lacy panties. “Remind me to send her a thank-you card.”

She bursts out laughing. “Please don’t. She’ll take it to heart and frame it or something.”

Once we arrive at the house, I study Vada’s features, and I’m positive memories of us here together are flooding through her mind. She looks around, her face contorting into something unrecognizable.

“What’s on your mind?” I ask once we’re standing on the sidewalk in front of the house. Grabbing her hand, I pull her body toward mine. “I’m really happy you’re here.”

“It feels a little like déjà vu,” she says, honestly. “And it scares me a little.”

“Don’t be scared, sweetheart.” I press a soft kiss against her mouth. “I don’t bite, unless requested of course.”

“Why can’t I get you out of my head, Ethan Rochester?” She tilts her head as she asks the question. “You’re bad news.”

“Probably because I’m the best sex you’ve ever had,” I say, confidently.

Her eyes widen as the realization hits her. “Oh my God.” She covers a hand over her mouth, laughing. “You read the book.”

“Of course, I did.” I smile in return. “It was the church’s book club pick of the month. Very popular with the older ladies, by the way.”

Her cheeks redden, and her eyes bug out in embarrassment. “Stop it!”

“I’m serious! I couldn’t look Aunt Millie in the eyes for weeks once she learned of my cock piercing.” I chuckle, shaking my head at the memory of her reading those parts.

Her face falls into her palms as she dies laughing. “Guess they read between the lines.”

“Yeah, Nathan?” I quirk a brow.

She’s still laughing. “Fuck. I honestly didn’t think you’d even hear about it.”

“Seriously? It’s been in the local papers for weeks and in those ‘anticipated reads’ articles. Apparently, being with the bad boy excites a lot of people.” I wink.

“Aunt Millie must think I’m a slut,” she blurts out as I lead her down the path to the front of the house.

“No, but she thinks I’m a manwhore. So thanks for that,” I tease, taking out my keys and unlocking the door.

“She thought that long before I came around.” She laughs.

“True.”

After walking into the house, I lead her into the kitchen and pin her against the wall. I know I should be taking it slow with her, considering we still have so much to discuss, but I can’t pass up this opportunity. I have no idea what it’ll lead to—if anything at all—and I’ve been miserably waiting for this day to come.

“What do you say we skip dinner and go right to dessert?” I ask against her neck, inhaling her sweet scent.

I feel her chest moving rapidly as she breathlessly responds, “Yes.” It’s a whispered plea, and I don’t waste any time. My lips on hers, her hands on me, our bodies pressed together as if we’ll float away without the weight of the other.

“Tell me what you want, Vada,” I murmur in her ear.

“You.”

Wrapping my arms around her hips, I dig my nails into her ass and squeeze. Lifting her up, she circles her legs around me, and I carry her to the table.

“I can’t wait any longer, I have to taste you.” After setting her down, I kneel and part her legs just enough for my hand to slide up her leg and tug at her panties. “Red is officially my new favorite color.” I smirk, looking up at her as she blushes.

Sliding her panties all the way down, I pull off her heels and toss them aside. “When I’m done devouring you for dessert, I want you bent over this table wearing only those heels.”

“Oh my God…” She moans, leaning back on her elbows. “You’re giving me way too much book material.” She smiles, and I know she’s not joking.

“I’d be happy to give you more inspiration…I have all night, sweetheart.” I meet her eyes and wink before parting her legs farther. Hooking her knee over my shoulder, I kiss a line until I reach the sweetness in between her legs. “Goddammit, Vada,” I growl, flattening my tongue against her slit. “I’ve been craving this for months. Fuck.”

She releases a throaty moan as I find her clit and circle it with my tongue. Her fingers wrap around my biceps, and her nails dig in as I slide my tongue inside her.

“Vada…” I breathe out, desperately.

“Ethan…” she whimpers in return.

I bring my hand up her thigh and rub the pad of my thumb along her clit as I kiss along her inner thigh. My fingers slide down her pussy and push inside her tight cunt. Her hips buck at the intrusion, and she bellows out another moan.

“Do you know how fucking mad at you I was when you left me, Vada…” I slip a second finger inside her. She stretches her neck and looks at me with hooded eyes. I push in deeper. “I lost my shit when I realized you were really gone. Your luggage was gone. The drawers in the cottage were empty. You took the last sliver of hope I felt and ripped it to fucking shreds.” I increase the pace, finger fucking her hard and fast.

“Ethan…” she begins, but she bites her bottom lip, and a moan slips through them.

“I called and texted you a hundred times. For the first time in years, I felt something. I hadn’t realized it until you left, and my heart broke all over again.”

“Ethan, stop talking…” she orders, and I spread her legs wider and sink in deeper. The more I think about it now, the angrier I get, knowing she could’ve called or texted me so we could’ve worked it out. I still would’ve given her space to finish her book, but I was left in limbo.

“Aunt Millie told me to go to you. She said to fight for you, Vada. I wanted to, tried to convince myself I should, but I couldn’t bear the thought of you telling me to leave or that the feelings were no longer mutual. So I fucking chickened out. Sent you flowers instead. Tried telling myself it was for the best, that one week with you was enough.”

“Ethan, please…” she begs, her eyes filling with tears.

I slow my rhythm but don’t stop.

“I’ve been lying to myself for twelve fucking months, hoping you’d realize how much you meant to me and come back to me, but now that I have you here with me, all I want is for you to know how much you hurt me…”

“Ethan…” she begs louder. “I’m sorry!” I rotate my wrist and slide my finger in and out of her again. “Fuck. I’m sorry I left without saying goodbye. It’s been torturing me ever since.” Her honest words fuel my anger even more.

“Then why didn’t you come back sooner and let me explain?” I fire back. “I needed you as much as you needed me.”

She winces before her body tenses, and I feel her tighten around me. Her orgasm starts to build, and she’s no longer in control as she arches her back and releases a deep, desperate moan. Desperate for more, desperate for me.

“I was scared,” she finally admits. “I’m still scared.”

Standing up, I push my fingers inside my mouth and taste her sweetness.

“Don’t be, because, for the first time in six years, I’m not. I know exactly what I want.”

She adjusts her body and sits up so she can look up into my eyes. Reaching for me, she wraps her petite hands in mine. “Isn’t getting closure this time a much better ending to our story?”

“This isn’t the end, baby. We’re just beginning.”