With the coming of August 1930, Leona learned that she was with child and reluctantly told Dan.
“We only did it once, and you’re pregnant? What are we gonna do now?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” Leona said.
“Well, there’s only one thing we can do; we have to get married.”
“What about your school?” she asked.
“Don’t worry about that; my parents have money,” Dan said. “It’ll be a little harder for me to study with a kid running around, but I’ll handle it.”
Although it now seemed like Leona’s troubles were over, they were really just beginning. She learned that Dan’s Irish Catholic parents were not only rich, but extremely highbrow. They thought that Leona wasn’t good enough for their son, especially with her being a Protestant and having Indian blood. Although Daniel O’Leary loved Leona, he didn’t love her enough to give up his promised inheritance, so he broke up with the distraught girl, offering to pay for an abortion. Her response was not what he expected.
“You can keep your precious money, Dan. I have no intention of getting an abortion; I’m not gonna compound one mistake by making another. I’m not sure if I want to keep the baby or not, but if I don’t there are plenty of couples who can’t have children and are desperate to adopt one. I’m sure my baby will be raised in a good family if I decide to give it up.”
“How can you be sure, Leona?” Dan asked.
“I guess in the end you can’t be one-hundred-percent certain about anything. I sure was wrong about you. But there are two things I do know: I’m not gonna abort my baby, no matter what. And if I don’t keep it I’ll try my best to make sure that the people who adopt my child are nice and will raise it just the way my parents raised me.”
—1—
When Leona told her father that she was pregnant and that the baby’s father would not marry her, he became enraged.
“How could you be so careless, Leona?” Murdock yelled. “I thought you were smarter than that!”
“I just made a dumb mistake, Papa. I didn’t kill anyone!”
“Don’t you realize that people will be talking about you now?” he asked.
“Of course I do. But you and Mama and lots of other people made the same mistake I made. Only, you were able to get married. I can’t help it if I wasn’t as lucky as you two.”
“That’s enough, young lady!” Murdock screamed. “Now, go to your room!”
Leona ran to her room crying. She had never seen her father act the way he did that night. After sending Leona to her room, Murdock proceeded to empty a bottle of whiskey. Although by no means an alcoholic, he took up drinking for the first time when his wife died, and as a result had never learned to properly handle liquor. Fortunately he went on a drinking binge only once or twice a year, usually on the anniversary of his marriage to Margaret or on the anniversary of her death, when the pain in his heart became too much to bear. This time however it wasn’t pain as much as it was undue frustration and disappointment that caused Murdock to drink. Regardless, that night he went to bed drunk and he spent most of it tossing and turning, as did Leona.
Bright and early the next morning Murdock sat at the kitchen table for an hour drinking coffee and trying to sober up. When he was finally sober and able to concentrate, he hashed through Leona’s predicament in his head. After a while he got over being mad at her and when she came into the kitchen he apologized.
“Leona, I’m sorry I yelled at you last night. I think I was more mad at myself than at you.”
“What do you mean, Papa?”
“I promised your mother on her deathbed that I would take good care of you kids and I felt like I let her down.”
“You didn’t do anything wrong, Papa. I’m not a kid anymore. I made the mistake, not you. You can’t be responsible for my actions.”
“I suppose not,” he said. “Oh, I don’t know; maybe we’re both being too hard on ourselves. You were right though: things like that happen. Love is so powerful it makes people do things they normally wouldn’t do, so I guess no one is really to blame for what happened.”
“Then, you really aren’t mad at me anymore?”
“No, sweetheart. I thought long and hard about what you said. You’re right. You just made a stupid mistake, that’s all. You were right about something else too: Nobody talks about it, but almost every married couple I know had to get married sooner than they planned. You’re not the first one to be in this situation and you won’t be the last.”
“I know, Papa. I just wish Dan had enough courage to marry me. I really did love him. And I know he loved me too.”
“I know, dear. And most decent men would have married you in a heartbeat. You just happened to be one of the unlucky ones who fell in love with someone without an ounce of integrity, someone who loved money more than he loved you. But I guess that’s water under the bridge.”
“Why did this have to happen to me, Papa?”
“I don’t know, sweetheart, any more than I know why your mother had to die when she did. But there’s one thing I do know for sure: Dan’s missing out on a good woman and he’ll regret it for the rest of his life.”
“Thanks, Papa.”
“Your welcome, sweetheart. There’s one other thing I know too.”
“What’s that?”
“When I was sitting here this morning thinking about what happened, something occurred to me. I realized that you wouldn’t have gotten pregnant if it wasn’t God’s will.”
“You really think so, Papa?”
“Of course, sweetheart. I’ve been taught all my life that God is almighty and nothing happens unless he wants it to. So he must’ah wanted you to have a child. Why, I don’t know? But he must have a good reason.”
“Huh?” Leona said as she pondered his words.
“Now, you have something very important to consider,” Murdock said. “Are you gonna keep the baby or give it up for adoption?”
“I’m not sure, Papa. I know if I keep it, people will talk.”
“They’ll do that anyway, Leona,” he reasoned.
“Yes, but having a baby around will be a constant reminder to them.”
“Don’t worry about what others think, honey. Just keep a stiff upper lip and do what you think is right for you and for your baby. Whatever your decision, I’ll stand by you.”
“What do you think I should do, Papa?”
“That’s your decision, Leona. No one can and no one should make it for you.”
—2—
Murdock continued to make amends to his daughter by helping her in any way he could throughout her pregnancy, but he figured the best way to help Leona was to get her away from the ridicule she would likely endure from the people she knew in Glenburn. In order to make her pregnancy easier during the most stressful time, and to make sure she received the best care, Murdock suggested she spend the last months of it at a home for unwed mothers in Bangor; she agreed.
The place Leona chose to have her baby was on Essex Street, not far from her sister Lillian’s Stillwater Avenue home and a half-mile from where she was born on Palm Street, a quarter-mile westward along Stillwater Avenue and a similar distance northward on Essex. Her two-month stay at The Home Private Hospital was a pleasant one for Leona. She was waited on hand and foot, and was given the best medical treatment thanks to its owner Mrs. Ford, a registered nurse, and her assistants. While there, Leona met other girls and women who shared her predicament. As a way to figuratively shrug off their unwanted experience they often talked about the men who seduced them and caused them to be in this uncomfortable situation.
“Most men are jerks,” Beverly Simpson said. “All they care about is you-know-what. It’s enough to turn a girl into a lesbian.”
Immediately thinking of one of the middle-aged nurses who worked there, Leona joked: “I wonder if that’s what happened to Miss Jordan.”
After the laughter died down, Betsy Simms set it off again by saying: “I think I’d rather be like Miss Jordan than that nympho, Mrs. Jones.”
Mrs. Jones was a head nurse at the Home Private Hospital and was a frequent target of the women’s jokes.
“I think there are advantages to both lifestyles,” sultry Janet Sawyer said, hoping to engender more laughter.
Unfortunately for her the joke backfired when Leona again joined in the amusing banter.
“I’m sure you do, Janet. After all, you know what they say: practice makes perfect.”
Even Janet laughed hysterically at that one, as she and the others did at all the jokes that made the rounds at the Home Private Hospital. And although Leona’s predicament was not the way she would have planned it, she, along with the others at the hospital, made the best of it.
—3—
On Wednesday, February 25th, 1931, Leona gave birth to a healthy baby girl. She named her newborn Marceline Iris Haley after Marceline Day, her favorite movie star, who she thought to be one of the most beautiful women she had ever seen. Leona had seen her many times at the matinees in Bangor, the last time being only four months earlier in the movie Paradise Island. The new mother was much more inventive in choosing the baby’s middle name. By chance, Iris was short for Irish—the nationality of her former boyfriend and only true love—and, not by chance, it was also her mother Margaret’s favorite flower, the one she planted in the middle of her beautiful garden.
At first Leona planned to give her baby up for adoption, but she changed her mind at the last minute thanks to a persistent nurse named Miss Christiansen, who desperately wanted her to keep it. After Leona made the decision to keep her baby, the nurse said:
“Oh, I’m so glad. You know, Leona, not many people know this, but not that long ago I was in the same boat as you. I know you’ll never regret keeping your little girl, not for ah minute. And there’s something else I want you to know.”
“What’s that, Nurse Christiansen?” Leona asked.
“I know your dad. He’s a wonderful man.”
“How do you…?”
“It’s time to go home now, Leona,” Mrs. Ford interrupted as she walked into Leona’s room.
“Your father’s here. He’s waiting in the lobby.”
“Well, speak of the devil. It’s just like Murdy to show up all unexpected like,” the nurse said.
“Nurse Christiansen,” Mrs. Ford said, “there’s a new patient checking in. Will you please take her to her room and then show her around?”
“Sure thing, Mrs. Ford. Well, Leona, take care. I hope you enjoyed your stay here. Be sure to say hello to Murdy for me,” the nurse said. And then she turned and walked out the door.
“Nurse, jus’ta….” Leona called out too late.
“Oh well, I’ll ask Papa how they met.”
—4—
Murdock was able to take Leona home a week after the delivery. On the ride back to West Glenburn she had a question for him.
“Papa, one of the nurses at the hospital says she knows you; Nurse Christiansen. Where do you know her from?”
“That’s a long story, sweetheart, and when we get home I’ll tell you all about it. For now, let’s just say that a long time ago I did her a favor and now she’s done one for me.”
Although at first Murdock was mildly ashamed of what happened to his daughter, with time he realized that Leona’s plight was no different than Margaret’s. The only difference was that Margaret had someone who loved her as much as she loved him. Still, Leona worried that her father might feel uncomfortable having her baby daughter in his house. Fortunately for her it didn’t take long for Murdock to be smitten by “little Marcy,” and after that occurred the baby and her doting grandfather were all but inseparable. Indeed, Leona’s father helped take care of the baby as if she was his own. Even so, being an unwed mother was hard on Leona because it was looked upon by most with disdain. Some people treated unwed mothers as if they were dirt, and unfortunately some of the residents of Glenburn were particularly spiteful to her, even though most of them didn’t really know Leona. Still, whenever they passed the Haley house they would yell insults at her. So whenever she wanted to go outside to get some fresh air, she would sit and rock her baby girl on the back porch or play with her in the back yard where they could not be seen.
Leona almost felt trapped in her own home, especially with no one around to talk to during the day. She no longer had her Aunt Mae to visit or talk with, because three months earlier she and her family had finally moved to California, after wanting to do so for years. Occasionally Wally was home, but the 16-year-old was now in high school and when he wasn’t he chummed around with neighborhood friend Earl Terrill, and his cousins Woodrow and Lloyd. Wally had also made new friends in Bangor, so the teenager was always on the go. That meant, with her father and sister working during the day, Leona was often left alone in the house to contend with whatever snide remarks were hurled her way.
“I can almost understand the ignorant attitude of the men, but I can’t understand why the women and girls act that way,” she told her father. “After all, the same thing that happened to me could just as easily happen to them.”
In truth, it often did. When Leona asked her father why they were being so cruel and heartless, he responded without hesitation.
“Don’t you worry about them, Leona. Believe me those girls aren’t motivated by any moral outrage, because they don’t have half your moral convictions. They’re just jealous of you for being so darn pretty, and for being so darn smart too.”
“Thanks, Papa. Do you really think so?”
“I know so. The girls in this part of town have always been jealous of you. Well, most of them anyway.”
“Really?” she asked modestly.
“Really! I don’t know how many times I’ve been told that by neighbors. So don’t let them get to you, dear; like I told you before: just keep a stiff upper lip.”
“I don’t understand why people have to be jealous, Papa. Why can’t they just be happy for people?”
“That’s something I’ve never understood either,” Murdock replied. “In one sense I can understand their jealousy, but in another I don’t understand it at all. Jealousy is one of the most unflattering traits that anyone can have, but unfortunately it’s the most prevalent one too. If anyone had a reason to be jealous it was your mother, because she never had much; and, yet, you never heard her complain or even begrudge anyone else for having more than she did. In fact, it was just the opposite. She was always happy to see others do well.”
A tear came to Murdock’s eye, and he hung his head and said: “I’m just sorry I couldn’t have given your mother more.”
Leona tried to console her father by hugging him and wiping away his tears. Then she spoke to him as forcefully as she could.
“We may not have been wealthy, Papa, but Mama never considered herself poor; quite the opposite. She would always tell me how lucky we were to have you, and that she was the luckiest person alive because she had such a wonderful family. She may have had to work hard, but she didn’t mind that in the least. Like you, she always said that hard work never killed anyone. It gave Mama tremendous satisfaction to know that the two of you were making a good home for us kids. And I know I’ll always be thankful that I had you and Mama for parents.”
“Thanks, Leona,” her father replied after regaining his composure. “It makes me feel good to hear you say that. We did the best we could, and you can be sure that I’ll try my darn’dest to be a good father to you from here on out. And you can count on me to help you take care of little Marcy until you have your own home. ‘Til then, we both have to ignore what people might say about you. Those people are just plain ignorant and aren’t worth worrying about anyway.”
—5—
So began Leona’s life as a mother and homemaker. It wasn’t the way she would have planned it, or wanted it to be. Her life was supposed to be somewhat normal, like her parent’s.
“Oh, I knew there would be heartaches, as well as happiness, but look at my situation now,” she thought. “Could it be any worse?”
Then she thought back on something her mother often said: “That’s the way it is, so you might as well make the best of it.”
And that’s what Leona was determined to do, come hell or high water.
As time went on, Leona settled into her new life with relative ease. Although cooking, cleaning and working in the family garden was hard work, she found ways to enjoy it by singing and talking to her newborn. She entertained the baby, and herself, by telling stories about Grandma Margaret and great-Grandma Eunice. Wherever Leona was, regardless of what she was doing, her baby was always right beside her, thanks to a carriage Murdock made for her. Even when she worked outside in the hot sun clearing weeds or picking vegetables, little Marcy was in the carriage protected from the sun by an adjustable umbrella that provided more than enough shade, without blocking cooling breezes.
As for her household duties, Leona’s new life as a mother wasn’t much different than any other women’s. Although she didn’t have a husband to care for, she had her father and brother who needed her help, maybe even more so than a husband. And, of course, she had her motherly duties, which were much more intensive. Caring for a baby was indeed challenging, but the experience she acquired by helping Margaret take care of Wally made that task much easier. And although her carefree days were now over, Leona still enjoyed her life at her family’s familiar home and in its peaceful, picturesque, country setting.
Leona hoped that whenever something got her down she would still have her dreams to help her through it. But at this moment in time she realized that her childhood days were gone for good, and she feared that entering adulthood meant her magical comet rides were likely a thing of the past. To her surprise she would soon learn that her last ride on Haley’s Comet was far from her last one. Indeed, Leona would have many more opportunities in her adult life—both good and bad—to enjoy her amazing Journey With the Comet.
Join Leona for more adventures in Journey With the Comet: The Journey Continues.
THE END