Hannah’s decision to behave in a manner more becoming of a mature schoolteacher and nanny when she was around Sawyer proved easier to practice than she expected. Tuesday through Thursday, Sawyer dropped the children off at school and picked them up with nary a word about anything other than the weather, which remained uncomfortably humid.
On Friday morning, it was Doris who greeted Sawyer at the base of the stairs, so when Hannah saw him there, she returned to her classroom. She figured if Doris wanted to sidle up to him with another apple crisp, she could give it her best effort. He’d probably grumble later that it sat in his stomach like a brick anyway.
She immediately scolded herself for having such stingy thoughts. She had been uncharacteristically peevish for most of the week, and she couldn’t put a finger on what was bothering her. She only knew that once the children left for the evening, she hastily finished her chores and retreated to her room to prepare lessons for the following day. She reasoned there was no sense remaining in the parlor; it wasn’t as if her grandfather ever initiated a conversation, and he hardly appeared interested in the topics she brought to his attention.
But her cranky mood always vanished when she was with the children, whose wholesome inquisitiveness and entertaining chatter as they walked home from school buoyed her spirit.
“Can we show Daed the stream tonight?” Samuel asked for the second time that week.
“May we show Daed the stream tonight?” Sarah corrected him in her best teacher voice.
“Please?” Simon added.
Hannah hesitated. Over the past few days she had begun to suspect Sawyer was avoiding her as much as she was avoiding him.
“Your daed has seen many streams before,” she said.
“Jah, but this is a special stream,” Samuel said.
“What makes it special?”
“It’s your stream,” he said.
Hannah was tickled by the sentiment, but said, “I think after a difficult day of working in the fields, your daed’s feet are sore and he doesn’t want to walk all the way to the stream.”
“But that is exactly why we must take him there,” Simon contended. “He can take off his shoes and socks and soak his sore feet in the water. It always makes my toes feel better.”
Hannah chuckled at Simon’s logic. “Jah, I know it does, Simon. I have to mention to your daed that your shoes are pinching your toes. I think you’re going through a growth spurt. It’s permissible for you to go barefoot now, but later in the fall, you’ll need proper-fitting shoes.”
“But can we show him the stream?”
“Jah, you may,” she replied.
If it meant that much to the children, she didn’t see harm in allowing them to take their father to the stream. Besides, they knew the way there; it wasn’t as if she had to accompany them. She would wait to see how Sawyer reacted to the suggestion. She hoped by that evening any awkwardness between them would have passed and Sawyer would know how sensible she was, despite her temporary lapse in appropriate behavior.
But that evening, it was John Plank and Doris, not Sawyer, who arrived to gather the children.
Hannah was so surprised, she rushed across the grass to the buggy and blurted out, “Where is Sawyer? Is he alright?”
“What a nervous Nellie you are,” scoffed Doris. “He’s fine.”
“The boys had work left to accomplish,” explained John. “There may be bad weather tomorrow, so they wanted to finish as much as they could tonight.”
Doris boasted, “After I surprised them when I dropped in to cook a hearty meal, they had the strength to complete their work. John and I thought since my horse was already out, we’d use my buggy to pick up the triplets. Besides, as you can guess, John can’t get into and out of the buggy without an adult to help him.”
Hannah marveled that there was no end to what Doris would do to catch a man’s attention. But she doubted her efforts would amount to anything anyway; Sawyer didn’t appear interested in her.
After the triplets had been rounded up and the buggy was ready to depart, John snapped his fingers and said, “I almost forgot. Sawyer had a message for you.”
Anticipation fluttered in Hannah’s chest. “Jah?”
“He said if it is raining tomorrow, please don’t expect Sarah, Simon and Samuel,” John stated. “Although he said, of course, you’d be compensated for the full week, regardless of the weather.”
Hannah’s cheeks burned. Sawyer’s offer further emphasized that their connection was based solely on an employment relationship, and she found it insulting he’d suggest she expected payment for a service she didn’t provide.
“Please tell Sawyer I said he might better spend his money on new shoes for the boys—their feet have outgrown the pairs they have now.”
She strode toward the house without another word.
* * *
Sawyer swatted at a fly buzzing around his ear as he pitched hay in the horses’ stalls. He felt as ornery as a mule. Admittedly the yumasetta casserole Doris made was delicious, but he would have preferred eating one of his uncle’s unsavory concoctions in silence to listening to Doris prattling at dinner. Furthermore, because of Doris’s insistence that she and John pick up the children, Sawyer missed seeing Hannah that evening. If it rained, he wouldn’t see her on Saturday, either.
He noticed she’d been out of sorts all week, and he was concerned he had offended her by his behavior on Monday. Or was it an issue of money—perhaps taking care of the children was worth more than he was paying her, especially when they were sick? Did she regret taking on the position after all? At least if it rained tomorrow, she’d have a day to herself. Perhaps that was what she desired.
He resolved to speak to her candidly about it on Saturday if it didn’t rain, or on Sunday if it did. Church was scheduled to meet at James and Amelia Hooley’s house this Sabbath. The only obstacle Sawyer could foresee was that Doris was sure to be around, since she lived with them, but he was determined to somehow seek Hannah out alone.
Much to Sawyer’s relief, by the time he returned to the house, Doris was gone.
“Are the kinner in bed?” he asked his uncle.
“Doris said they were asleep before their heads hit the pillow. Hannah Lantz must keep them busy and well fed. They are sleeping better, jah?”
“Jah,” Sawyer affirmed, grinning. “She is doing them gut.”
“She is doing you all gut,” his uncle replied. “Doris was right—a house needs a woman’s touch to make it a home.”
Sawyer wondered what he was getting at. He shrugged and said, “Jah, I am glad I hired her.”
“Speaking of that,” John said, “Hannah rejected your offer of being compensated if it rains tomorrow and Samuel, Sarah and Simon stay here on the farm. She said your money is better spent on new shoes for the kinner.”
“She said what?” Sawyer asked. “What were her exact words?”
John snorted. “I didn’t write them down, man! I only recall that she bristled a bit at the mention of her salary.”
Sawyer was flummoxed. Even when he didn’t speak with Hannah in person, he managed to bungle his words. He’d have to set it right first thing in the morning.
But when he awoke on Saturday, a heavy rain was thrumming against the roof, thwarting his plans and making for another agonizingly long day without talking to Hannah.
* * *
The driving rain did nothing to cool the temperature; instead, the air felt tropical and oppressive. Hannah had just completed her housework when her grandfather asked her to accompany him to town. Although it was pouring, the sky was white, not dark. Hannah figured it wouldn’t produce the kind of severe storm that made both her and the horse nervous, so she agreed to go.
Indeed, by the time they arrived in town, the rain had subsided enough for Hannah to dash into the mercantile without getting drenched, while her grandfather visited the hardware store. Once home, she prepared and served dinner and then cleaned and put away the dishes. Afterward, she felt so listless, she baked a triple batch of molasses cookies to bring to James and Amelia’s home for church. Usually the family hosting church on a particular week provided the midday meal, but they wouldn’t turn away dessert, so Hannah baked enough to feed the entire district.
“Smells gut,” her grandfather huffed when he entered the kitchen.
She knew from a lifetime of experience that this was his peace offering—a kind word in exchange for a rash of harsh ones. She didn’t harbor any bitterness toward him because, as he stood before her, his hands behind his back, she saw him for who he was: a man too stubborn to change, but in need of love just as he was.
“Denki.” She smiled. “I have set some cookies aside for you to have with your coffee.”
“Here,” he said, placing something on the table. “For the girl and her brothers.”
It took a moment for Hannah to register what she’d been given: a wooden board, sanded smooth, with two lengths of rope knotted through each end. She realized this was the reason he insisted on going to town today: he needed rope to make a tree swing.
“The kinner will enjoy this very much. Denki, Groossdaadi.”
Her grandfather grunted and accepted the cup of coffee and plate of cookies she extended to him.
“Their daed will have to hang it for them,” he said before heading to the parlor. Lest she forget, he reminded her, “And he will need to take it down before they leave. It is only temporary.”
* * *
Sawyer was relieved when the Sabbath came. His cousins became easily frustrated around the children, and they were especially exasperated when they were cooped up for hours together in the house. He himself felt more and more irascible as the day wore on, the rain a steady deluge against the windows.
“There’s no sense in all of us squeezing into one buggy,” he announced on Sunday morning. “Besides, my horse needs to stretch its legs.”
He left early with the children, intending to speak to Hannah before the services began. He hoped she would be willing to keep an eye on Sarah, Simon and Samuel, since the men sat separately from the women and young children during the services.
But no sooner had he hitched his horse and crossed the yard than Doris appeared out of nowhere.
“Guder mariye, Sawyer,” she greeted him. “Won’t your onkel and cousins be coming this morning?”
“Guder mariye,” he repeated. “Jah, they’ll be here soon. We traveled separately.”
Sawyer surreptitiously scanned the yard as he was talking to Doris and spotted Hannah far across the lawn.
But before Hannah neared, Doris suggested, “I will watch the kinner, so you may go join the other men. They’re over there.”
Sawyer understood it was customary in this district for the men to gather outside in small groups, usually around the barn, before the services began. Likewise, the women congregated in the kitchen and parlor. At the appropriate time and according to a designated order, the men and women would file into the hosts’ meeting room—the Hooleys’ basement, in this instance—to worship together. As Jacob Stolzfus signaled to him, Sawyer reluctantly accepted Doris’s offer and tramped toward the barn.
A few minutes later, Sawyer took a place on a bench toward the back of the men’s section. He hoped Hannah wouldn’t think sending the children with Doris was his preference. In fact, he hoped no one thought that, or he’d be the talk of the district.
Yet following lunch, he found out that was exactly what people did think. When he joined a circle of men cavorting in the yard, Jacob commented, “We saw you chatting with Doris this morning and noticed your kinner with her, as well. What is the meaning of that?”
“There is no meaning,” he stammered. “She offered to oversee the kinner during the service and I accepted.”
“Are you quite certain about that?”
“Of course I am certain.”
“But we have heard her say she has come round to the farm several times recently, supposedly on the pretense of helping with household chores,” Jacob pressed. “She’s an unmarried woman and you’re a widower…yet you still deny she has any designs on you or that you have any interest in courting her?”
In a resounding voice, Sawyer countered, “How many times do I have to tell you, I have no romantic intentions toward that woman? If you must know, I think she behaves more like a silly schoolgirl than a schoolteacher. She is helping my family during a time of need, that is all,” he said loudly. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I must call my kinner.”
* * *
“There’s no need to call them—they are all right here behind you. I brought them over so I could say hello before I left. So, hello, Sawyer. Hello, gentlemen,” Hannah said pointedly, acknowledging the small group of men, who suddenly kicked at the dirt or surveyed the clouds. Then, “I will see you tomorrow, Simon, Sarah and Samuel, Gott willing.”
She had never felt so humiliated in her life, and she couldn’t get away from Sawyer quickly enough. His opinion of her was shameful on its own, but did he have to share it with the other men in her district?
“Hannah, please wait!” he shouted to her, but she pretended to be as deaf as her grandfather as she marched toward the buggy where he was waiting for her.
She was relieved when her grandfather worked the horse into a brisk pace. Back at home, he wandered to his room for a nap and she to the porch to wallow in a good hard cry. She was blowing her nose when a buggy she recognized came up the lane. It was too late to dash inside: Sawyer had already seen her.
“Guder nammidaag, Hannah,” he called with a friendly wave, as if he hadn’t just insulted her and belittled her reputation in front of a half dozen other men.
“Sawyer,” she said flatly, glancing beyond him toward the buggy. The children didn’t appear to be in it. “Where are Sarah, Simon and Samuel?”
“I left them with my onkel,” he replied, removing his hat. “Doris said she would see to it he didn’t forget to bring them home when he was ready to leave,” he joked, but she wouldn’t let him wrest a smile from her lips.
He shifted his weight and continued feebly, “Let’s just hope she doesn’t try to comb Sarah’s hair again. Sarah complained she didn’t do it as carefully as you do—she said it hurt her scalp—and it doesn’t appear as neat, either.”
“I’m sure Doris was trying her best.” Hannah’s temper flared as she rose from her chair. If Sawyer thought insulting Doris was going to distract her from how he insulted her, he was gravely mistaken.
“Of course,” Sawyer responded. “It goes without saying Doris did a much better job than I’ve ever done. I didn’t mean to sound ungrateful.”
“Just as you didn’t mean to sound ungrateful when you said what you said to Jacob Stolzfus and the others after church? That certainly sounded ungrateful to me. And mean-spirited, as well.”
Sawyer’s mouth stretched into a grim line. “I’m sorry. You are right. I said things I shouldn’t have.”
“Why are you sorry, Sawyer?” Hannah asked, placing her hands on her hips and glaring down at him on the bottom porch stair. “Is it because your words were untrue? Or is it because they were unkind?”
Sawyer kicked a pebble. “They most definitely were unkind. As for being untrue or not…I am sorry, Hannah, but I cannot be dishonest. I do find Doris’s behavior silly at times. My own sister Gertrude is half as young but acts twice as wise.”
“Doris?” Hannah gulped. Her knees felt as if they would buckle behind her.
“I know she is a friend of yours, and because of that, I don’t doubt she has redeeming qualities,” he answered, leaping up the stairs to stand in front of her. “But I have only experienced her superficial side. The other men were pressuring me to claim my intentions toward her, of which I have none. Still, I was wrong to say what I said. Please forgive me for speaking out of turn.”
As the realization of her mistake washed over Hannah, she struggled to gain her composure. She was so relieved she didn’t accuse Sawyer of what she thought him guilty of saying about her—he would have thought her ten times more nonsensical than Doris.
“I understand,” she said slowly. “Although I am not certain the situation warrants it after all, I accept your apology. Especially since you came all this way to express you intended no harm.”
* * *
Sawyer took a step backward and leaned against the railing.
“Actually,” he admitted, avoiding her radiant blue eyes, “I came because I was afraid I caused you an earlier offense.”
“What offense was that?” she asked, her lips pursed.
Sawyer didn’t know how he could answer her question without drawing attention to his behavior. If he hadn’t offended her in the first place, he didn’t want to point it out now.
Stuttering, he replied, “It’s just…I, er…I worry I may have been too intrusive. Taking liberties when I shouldn’t have.”
“I don’t know what you mean,” she replied. “But I assure you it isn’t the case. I am always happy to see you arrive. You and the kinner are most wilkom, regardless of whether they are under my charge or you are simply visiting.”
“In that case—” he grinned at her “—might you have any cookies to offer your visitor? I heard everyone raving about them at lunch, but I never got around to tasting one before I left.”
“Sweets before supper? Tsk, tsk,” Hannah said in mock consternation, and they both chuckled. “Please, take a seat and I’ll fix coffee.”
After the screen door slammed behind Hannah, Sawyer teetered nervously in the second rocking chair, running his fingers through his hair. He was glad he wore the fresh shirt Doris had laundered, and he smoothed the fabric down against his chest.
When Hannah returned, she told him a bit about her sister over the refreshments, and he talked about Gertrude and Kathryn.
“I can tell from the stories they share that the kinner adore Gertrude,” Hannah remarked. “I hope to be that kind of ant to my sister’s bobbel.”
“I have every confidence you will be,” Sawyer stated. He stammered before saying, “You mentioned my being ungrateful…and I, um, I want you to know how much I appreciate it that you are the one caring for my kinner.”
“You pay me well,” Hannah replied. “Too well, I think. But beyond payment, I am happy to do it. We are, after all, neighbors. For a time, anyway. I’d like to believe we are friends, as well.”
“We are indeed,” Sawyer declared vehemently, and then he immediately felt self-conscious. “As your friend—as your neighbor…that is, as your friendly neighbor, I want you to know if you are ever in need of my help, I hope you will ask me.”
“Really?” she asked, laughing in her fetching manner. “Because there is something that would be helpful.”
“What is it?”
“I will be right back,” she said and collected the dishes. When she emerged from the house, she was carrying a wooden swing. “I’m too short to hang this on the willow, and Groossdaadi’s balance is unreliable because of his hearing problem.”
Sawyer laughed heartily. “I’m definitely the right man for this task.”
He retrieved the ladder from the shed, and slight as she was, Hannah’s firm grasp held it steady. But even before he ascended the ladder, he felt twelve feet tall.