Ben was beginning to wish PC Fudge had thrown him in prison after all.

The next week was the worst of the boy’s life.

First, Mum insisted on putting him in a series of home-made ballroom-dancing costumes.

They were all on a scale that started with embarrassing, continued to hideously embarrassing and went all the way to horrifically embarrassing.

Every outfit had a theme. There was:

Mum’s least-worst creation was a costume simply called iceberg. This wasn’t because it was put in the freezer before Ben put it on. No, it was an all-white all-in-one bodysuit with lots of lumps and bumps that were meant to resemble a huge block of ice.

When you put it on and moved around, the overall effect was that of a giant dancing slushy!

“This one could be worse,” said Ben.

“You love it! Splendid!” cooed Mum. “And I am so pleased you chose that one as I have a brilliant idea for a routine for us. The story of the Titanic!”

“The ship that was sunk by an iceberg!” spluttered Ben.

“Yes! I am the ship, and you will be the iceberg!”

“A ship and an iceberg can’t dance together!”

Mum was most displeased. “Let’s have a bit of a better attitude, please! In the world of ballroom dancing, anything is possible!”

So she set out to prove this. All day, every day, Ben had to rehearse the dance routine with his mum. It was all set to the famous song from the film Titanic, “My Heart Will Go On”. He’d heard it so many times he wanted to cry every time the first note struck up.

Despite being only twelve and short for his age, the boy had to lift, hold and even spin his mum during the dramatic routine she had devised. This would have been easier for Dad, but that knee injury of his meant he would now be watching from the front row.

Mum’s outfit was equally as bonkers as her son’s. She was going to represent the RMS Titanic (RMS stands for Royal Mail Ship). The Titanic was the world-famous ocean liner that sank when she struck an iceberg on her maiden (or first) voyage across the Atlantic in 1912. So Mum made herself a huge cardboard ship outfit, complete with a hat that looked like a ship’s funnel with smoke coming out of the top.

Ben hated every minute of the dance rehearsals, but he tried his best for his mum. He didn’t want to let her down the night she was to dance for her idol Flavio Flavioli or embarrass himself in front of the Queen. However, Ben had always felt that he’d been born with two left feet.

SPOT THE DIFFERENCE

Ben wasn’t stupid. He knew he was never going to be a great ballroom-dancing superstar like Flavio. But he was pretty sure Flavio didn’t know how to unblock a toilet. So that seemed fair.

That week, Ben ate, slept and breathed ballroom. His arms ached, his feet were sore, his knees cracked, his head spun and his legs were wibbly wobbly woo-woo from all the dancing. What’s more, he’d now heard “My Heart Will Go On” at least a hundred times a day. Every time Mum put it back on the stereo, Ben wanted to cover his ears with his sink plungers.

He was almost too exhausted to carry on his detective work, but then the weirdest thing happened…