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SUNDAY MORNING, AT the end of the service, I lined up with eleven other candidates for baptism. I’d seen a few baptisms as a kid and had been underwhelmed. But today? Today I was excited and nervous at the same time, because each person was to profess their faith in Jesus before the pastors “dunked” them.
I was fifth in line. A teen by the name of Josh was first, and I had thought he was a shy kid. However, before he stepped into the water, he straightened his shoulders and spoke clearly, loud enough to carry across the sanctuary, even without a microphone.
“I want to confess to all of you today that without Jesus, I would be dead. I tried to kill myself four times. Each time, the Lord performed a miracle and brought me back. I know he intervened because my parents and my sister were praying for me. I was trapped in a lot of nasty stuff of my own choosing, but they loved me anyway and they never gave up on me.
“The last time I tried to kill myself, I went up to our cabin where no one would find me in time. I took a bottle of pills that should have put down a horse. Instead, I woke up two days later in a pool of my own dried vomit. I woke up . . . and God spoke to me.”
Josh’s voice gave out momentarily, and he had to clear his throat. “I woke up, and God said, ‘Josh, this is a picture of your life without me: You are lying in your own vomit. I sent Jesus to rescue you from your despair, but this is your last chance. You know the truth; now you must act on it.’”
The kid couldn’t have been more than seventeen, but he seemed much older when he said, “I knew then that I could try any means to end my life—any means at all—and this time, it would work. Suddenly, I was terrified. If I died, I knew I would spend eternity in hell. I-I cried out to Jesus and begged him to save me, begged him to forgive me.”
Josh’s parents and sister, sitting in the third row from us, were weeping.
Josh looked away, into a distance we couldn’t see. “Jesus came to me. I felt a fire inside, burning, cleansing, washing me clean. I got up, took a shower, cleaned up the cabin, and went home. All the way, during the drive, the presence of God was on me. That was two weeks ago. I’m here today to publicly confess my salvation, to profess my faith in Jesus Christ. I don’t deserve what he’s done for me, but I am so grateful.”
I was so caught up in the power of Josh’s testimony that I never heard the other professions of faith. When it was my turn, all my nervousness was gone. I said the congregation, “Hello. My name is Jayda Cruz. A year ago, I would never have dreamed I’d be a Christian, let alone be getting baptized. You see, I’d been raised in church and wounded in church, so I had erected a wall as hard as concrete between me and God. In fact, I despised Christians.
“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you how the Lord managed to break through that wall.”
I smiled at Zander, and he chuckled. No, that part of my story truly was unbelievable.
“It is enough here and now to say that Jesus brought me to a place of surrender. Surrender is an essential part of being a believer in Christ. I had to surrender my unforgiveness, my bitterness, my will, my way of doing things. I had to surrender everything to the Lordship of Christ. Since he is my Savior and Lord, I am acting in obedience to his word and asking to be baptized.”
I went down into the water and came up to shouts, applause, and the nanomites quoting Acts 2:38 in my ear: Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.
My heart was full.
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