Sadie threw her head back each time Drew pushed the swing in the quaint Creekside park. The little girl was so full of life, she was intoxicating. On the other hand, Jenna had become withdrawn, silently rocking on the swing next to Sadie. He tried not to think too much about it. She’d been through a lot in one day.
“So, they won’t provide the necessary tools for you to do your job? Yep, sounds like county politics. I wouldn’t take it personal. You know, the county administrator is the one who fought for this. You should talk to him at the board meeting and tell him how critical it is. I’m sure with a little persuasion he’ll come around.”
“You really believe that?” Jenna asked.
“Yes, I do. If not, I’ll give him a parking ticket every time he double parks outside his office until he changes his mind.” Drew pushed Sadie again and she leaned back enjoying the ride, her pink tutu fluttered in the wind.
“You’d do that for me?”
“I’d do a lot for you, Jenna. You deserve the best.”
She sighed. “I don’t know about that.”
The sadness in her voice made him long to cheer her up and let her enjoy life the way she used to. “Don’t let this thing with the money and job description get you down. You’ll figure something out. If you’re still the Jenna I once knew, you’ll have them begging you to take the money. You can’t give up yet.”
Jenna straightened, her back rigid, her chin tipped high. “I won’t,” she said with determination. She looked dazed, as if capturing a memory, and mumbled, “Not this time.”
He tried to read her thoughts, but her lost expression only confused him more. Perhaps she was regretting leaving her husband, giving up on the marriage. From what he understood, she had no choice. What kind of parent would institutionalize Sadie?
Some children chased each other around the merry-go-round, and by the way Sadie sat straight and eyed them, he guessed she wanted to join their fun. “You’ll get the money, trust me.”
“You’re right, I will. I took an undergraduate class that discussed grant writing. If I’m going to do the things I hope to, I’ll need more than just county funds anyway. I’m going to need a way to transport the kids, to utilize the latest technology, and have a sensory gym.”
“A sensory gym?”
She chuckled. “Yes, sorry. I’m getting obsessed about this again. It’s been a dream of mine to provide the right kind of methodologies each individual child could need. The schools do the best they can, but I didn’t want to work under the constraints of the public school system. I wanted to offer something more, a place for them to move and learn at the same time. To learn their strengths and encourage them. I’ve kind of combined the philosophy of my undergrad degree in therapeutic recreation and my masters in special education. A sensory gym is a place where children who seek stimuli, like Sadie, will feel secure and receive what their body needs while learning.”
He loved the fire in her eyes. The way her passion excited him made him want to help. “See? You’ve already won me over. I have no doubt you’ll win over the commissioners, too.”
She sighed. “I hope so. I’d like to try to make this work. If not, there isn’t a place for me here.”
Drew’s chest ached at the thought of her leaving again, to the point he couldn’t even think about it. He wanted the subject changed and quick. He wanted to make her see that he was worth staying in town for.
“Do you remember when we came here after the homecoming game our junior year?” Jenna asked.
An inner light glowed with the memory. “Yes. How could I forget? We were swinging right here next to each other. Jimmy and his girl had gone off on a walk and you looked at me and told me you loved me.”
“Yeah, and you fell off the swing.” She brushed her light hair from her eyes and dug her shoes into the sand beneath her. “I thought you were going to run away and never return.”
No doubt deciding she wanted to join the other children on the teeter-totter, Sadie leapt from the swing and landed like a perfect gymnast. For a second anyway, before she fell back on her pink tutu. Before he could see if she was okay, she climbed to her feet and raced off to the teeter-totter.
He took a seat on her empty swing and nudged into Jenna. “You kidding? I fell off the swing because I couldn’t believe how lucky I was. I’d fallen in love with you the day Mr. Brown made us partners on that project, and you told me to get over myself and do my own work.”
“Ha, that’s right. You were used to the girls doing whatever you told them to.”
He shrugged. “What can I say? It was a gift.”
“From what I’ve heard, you kept that gift. Word has it you’ve been the playboy of Creekside.”
Was that what was bothering her? She was worried he was playing games with her?
He twisted the swing to face her and took both her hands in his. “Jenna, I only dated superficially. I never committed to a girl since you.”
“Why?” Jenna’s eyes misted.
“Because.” He glanced at Sadie then back at Jenna. “I never got over you. You were the one that got away.”
Jenna analyzed the sand on her shoes. “I see. So I was the only girl that you never had.”
“No, Jenna. You’re the only girl I’ve ever loved. You may have been the first one to say it, but I felt it for far longer.”
Jenna’s shoulders lifted then fell twice before she squeezed his hands. “You should have gone on with your life. I’m so sorry that you were left with so many unanswered questions.”
“I could hold onto the anger at your mother, or the disappointment I felt when I discovered you believed I cheated on you, but life's too short and you’re here now.”
Jenna took a stuttered breath. “I don’t want to hurt you again. Not like that.”
“Be honest and you won’t. I know you’re scared, I can see it in your eyes.” Drew stood and tugged Jenna from the swing. “I know you’ve been through a lot with your ex-husband. I’m sure your trust in others is shattered after he turned his back on you and Sadie, and then you discovered your mother’s deception. But don’t shut me out. I’m not asking for a happily-ever-after here. I’m asking for right now, a moment to take a breath and get to know each other again. I promise to give you time to figure things out. I know Sadie is the most important person in your life, and she should be.” He tipped her chin so she’d face him. “Trust me.”
“I don’t know if I can.”
The teeter-totter thumped every few seconds and the sound of Sadie’s giggles confirmed her proximity to them. He nudged closer. The floral shampoo soothed his anxiety and he tucked her hair behind her ear so he could steal another look at her gorgeous green eyes. “You know, I think you’re still the prettiest girl in Sweetwater County. The prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.”
She snickered. “Does that usually work on girls? Smooth, Walker.”
“I don’t say that to all the girls, just to the ones that have haunted my dreams, day and night, for over a decade.”
Her arms trembled and he tucked her into his side to keep her warm, walking her over to the bench near the teeter-totters.
Jimmy rode by in his cruiser and waved. He returned the gesture but didn’t make his way over to speak to him. He’d get an earful soon enough about his behavior toward Jessica and how Jimmy had been right to call him out about Jenna.
“You two have remained friends all these years?”
The cruiser headed toward Main and took a left toward Jimmy's home. Thankful he didn’t stop, Drew settled back on the bench and Jenna joined him. “Yep, we didn’t see each other much when he was married to his first wife. She really did a number on him. I thought he’d never take a chance on someone again, but Trianna changed all that.”
“She must be pretty special.”
Sadie tumbled off the back of the teeter-totter and Drew shot up to scoop her off the ground, but Jenna snagged his hand. “She’s okay. She’ll just cry if she thinks she should.”
The softness of her skin hadn’t changed. And her eyes, her eyes nearly did him in. He cupped her cheek and she lifted her head. Her lips, full and calling to him, parted. In that moment, he wanted to kiss her, to reconnect with her, to hold her in his arms and never let her go.
He didn’t care who might see them in the park. Let everyone in Creekside see, the county, no, the world. If he could steal one kiss, he knew she’d remember how they were together and never want to leave.
He lowered back to her side and cupped her face. She leaned into him and his pulse raced faster than the kids playing chase.
Only inches from tasting bliss, she turned her head and looked away. An awkward silence remained between them. There was no way to play off the fact he’d just tried to kiss her and she rejected him.
“I’m sorry. I just…”
“No need to explain. Taking things slow, remember?” He stood and offered his hand. “I’m afraid I have to get you two home. I have a shift this afternoon, and I have a few errands to run before that.”
Jenna took his hand and stepped into his personal space, their bodies nearly pressed together. “I do want to kiss you. I just want to make sure that there's something here besides memories. Deep down I know that if we move forward too quickly, and it doesn’t work out, then we’ll never have another chance. And I have Sadie to think about.” She stood on her tiptoes and pressed her lips to his cheek.
It felt like a kiss goodbye.