Lola tucks her fingers inside the cuffs of her hoodie and won’t meet my eyes.
Fuck. This is bad.
“Axe? What’s going—oh, hey, guys!” Maisy waves, her usual sunny smile making an appearance. As she correctly reads the room, the tension that pulls tight between Axel, Lola, and me extends to Maisy. Her smile slips and her tone is cautious as she says, “Well, this is a nice surprise.”
I hold up the bag of bagels and tray with four coffees.
“Yay, coffee,” Maisy tries. “Shall we eat?”
Lola forces a grin. “Thanks, Mais.” She slides onto a barstool at the kitchen island.
Axel reluctantly jerks his chin to the stool next to Lola but I remain standing. Sitting will put me at a disadvantage and given the position I’m in, that’s the last thing I need.
“What’s going on?” Maisy asks, keeping her tone light.
Axel folds his arms over his chest, his biceps practically rippling with the energy I know he wants to unleash on me. He leans against the kitchen counter, glaring at me with pure hatred.
Lola clears her throat. I step closer.
Axel growls. Maisy grimaces.
The oxygen in the room evaporates. Heat swirls around my neck. The periphery of my vision blurs and darkens.
Fuck, man. Get it together.
Lola fumbles with the strings of her hoodie and I reach for her, needing us to provide a united front. Needing her to know that I’m here. I got her. We’re okay; everything is going to be okay.
I clasp her hand and hear the little sigh of gratitude that falls from her lips.
“Fuck,” Axel mutters, straightening. His hands drop to the island, planting in the center and spreading wide. Hands that could wrap around my neck and choke me out and the truth is, he has every right to feel that way.
I knocked up his virginal daughter.
“Axel—” I start.
“Daddy—” Lola says.
“Have some coffee,” Maisy advises, taking two coffees from the tray and setting them in front of us.
We both ignore them, our eyes glued to Brawler’s. Right now, he’s living up to his moniker and I know I need to be upfront. Address him man to man.
“Lola and I are together,” I say, ripping off the Band-Aid.
He hangs his head, staring at his hands as if they can provide some answers on where the hell he went wrong in his life. What did he fuck up that led his beautiful, brilliant daughter to seek out a screw-up like me?
“It’s not a fling, Axe. It’s for real. I’ve never cared about anyone the way I care for Lola.” I keep my eyes trained on him. In my peripheral vision, I see Maisy clasp her heart. I feel Lola’s eyes on the side of my face, hopeful.
But I’ll man up and be honest with her dad in ways I held back with her. In this moment, I’ll lay it all out on the table because I’m stepping up for my girl. Showing up for my family.
Axe laughs, a mutilated, disturbing sound. “It’s for real? Yeah? How fucking long you’ve been together, behind my back, for you to know that it’s more than some passing thing?” His voice is eerily even, a man on the verge of erupting.
“About two months,” Lola supplies. “It’s for real, Daddy.”
I squeeze her hand in solidarity.
“Well, isn’t that—” Maisy begins in a cheery tone.
“Fucking ridiculous,” Axel interjects. His glare bounces between Lola and me. “You don’t even know each other. You”—he points at me—“have no right setting Lola up to be one of your goddamn conquests.”
“It’s not like that,” I defend myself.
“Bullshit! In the two years I’ve known you, all you’ve done was fuck women and fuck off. You think you could treat her any different? You don’t know the first damn thing of being good to a woman. You’re not capable of—”
“I’m pregnant,” Lola announces, her fingers quivering in mine.
I don’t know if she says it to halt her father’s mostly correct judgement of my character. Or to get it over with. Or to change the direction of the conversation. Whatever her reasons, Lola heaves out a sigh and sits up straight.
The room is silent. The room is still. I barely breathe, my lungs having collapsed on themselves as I was forced to confront that all the shit Axel said is true. Maisy’s eyes are filled with sympathy. Axel’s face is drained of color.
And then, he snaps.
In one quick movement, he’s rounded the island. I throw my arm wide, angling my body, to protect Lola, a motion which infuriates him. He cocks back his arm and even though I know it’s coming right for me, I stand my ground and take it.
I deserve this. He earned this. One punch.
It connects with my jaw and my head snaps back, blood flying from the side of my mouth. I shuffle back a handful of steps but don’t go down. Axel advances, his eyes burning with fire, his sneer twisted in fury.
“Daddy, stop!” Lola cries.
“Axel, that’s enough,” Maisy warns.
She steps to my side and holds out a hand.
Axel freezes. His eyes narrow before clearing. He shakes his head, gesturing toward Maisy. “You’re on his side? Unbelievable. This punk knocked up my kid and—”
“That’s enough,” Maisy repeats, quieter this time. The last time I saw Maisy Stratford truly upset is the morning I barreled into her at The Honeycomb and flipped a tray of fresh baked blueberry muffins on her dress. It was her first day of work and she just received shitty news and I made her bad day even worse.
Now, she’s coming to my rescue.
I never thought myself capable of real change. But maybe even hopeless sob stories like me can contain a plot twist.
Axel vibrates with anger. He heaves out a sigh and runs his hands through his hair. His neck snaps to Lola. “Mom know?”
She shakes her head, moving to the freezer and filling a bag with ice. “Not yet.”
He snorts. Then nods. “Her life wasn’t an easy one.”
“I know,” Lola says quietly, coming to my side and passing me the bag. She guides me to the barstool next to hers and I sit down. Maisy passes me a dishtowel to wrap around the bag. I hold it against the left side of my face feeling like a fucking chump.
Watching Lola process Axel’s words, a confirmation of all her fears, hurts more than the throbbing in my face. The belief that I’m messing up her life is no longer an assumption. It’s a truth written on everyone’s expressions.
“Fuck, Lola.” Axel shakes his head, disappointment etched into every line in his face. He looks older, tired. “How the hell did this happen?”
“Dad, obviously, this wasn’t planned. I know you’re upset but this is where I’m at right now.” Lola glances at me. “River and I are going to figure this out.”
Axel snorts. “Oh, nice. Okay. Right. Tell me how. How the fuck are you and River going to figure this out?” Sarcasm drips from every word. “How much do you even know about River? Other than his shitty reputation, which he worked really hard to earn, what does anyone know about River?”
“Stop it,” Lola says, a note of steel in her tone. “I get that you’re upset. Blindsided. But River and I are having a baby and I need you, Dad. I need your support and your love. I need you.”
Axel’s face crumples at her words, at the pleading tone underlining them.
“Fuck,” he swears again. Then he walks around the island and pulls Lola into his arms, crushing her against his chest. One large paw holds her face, keeping her ear pressed against his heart.
Lola cries quietly and I avert my gaze, feeling like scum of the fucking Earth for hurting this beautiful girl. For drawing her father’s wrath. For being a point of contention in their family.
Maisy nudges my coffee cup closer, and I take a long swig of the brew, needing the jolt of caffeine.
“You good?” Maisy asks.
“Sure, Mais,” I reply.
Axel holds Lola for a long moment. Then, he pulls out his cell phone and lays in on the kitchen island. “We better call Anna,” he says, mentioning Lola’s mom.
Lola nods, wiping tears from her cheeks.
I wrap a hand around my coffee cup and let the heat of it keep me in the room. Axel sets the phone to speaker. I hear Lola tell her mom the news. I listen to Anna cry in shock.
I watch as Lola’s world falls apart, with both her parents bearing witness.
My mind floats away. My emotions twist into a jumble so damn complicated, sorting them out is an impossibility. Instead, I push them down. I push everything down and away until I can convince myself it’s gone.
Now, my job is to focus on this woman. On the baby. On salvaging something good from the wreckage I’ve caused.
Now, I need to prove that I’m not the picture Axel painted of me. More than ever, I need to man up and be worthy.
Rise to the occasion.
Be more than a goddamn fuckup.