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YOU NEVER KNOW WHERE or when you’ll find love...or when it might find you! And I found it, or I thought I did when I crossed the line big time and slept with my billionaire boss. What a huge taboo. A subordinate dating their boss is always a poor idea. And I knew that. It was risky business. But I swear my feelings felt real, so wonderfully and undeniably real. Tom was super smart, funny, and extremely adorable. He was everything I could ever want in a boyfriend. The romantic in me wanted to believe “love conquers all,” so to hell with the consequences.
I took the leap of faith. What a recipe for disaster. How very naïve of me, huh? I was devastated, sad, hurt, and disappointed.
More questions plagued me. How could I continue working for somebody who dumped me? No, I wasn’t being chased away. I loved this job more than anything. I fit in here. I did a great job. I was likable. I put out solid work, avoided office politics and gossip, and accepted criticism well.
Dating the boss was a bad idea for my career. And I knew that, but I was in in awe of my boss. I’d actually seen the guy in magazine articles and on television. And I even felt like the luckiest woman alive when he picked me out of all the women who fought for his attention. Talk about a huge ego boost. I always wondered why he chose me. Was it because I was forbidden fruit? Or maybe it was the adrenaline rush from breaking the rules. He lavished me with a world I never knew, from excessive spending and fine dining to expensive gifts and fancy country clubs. And then there was the sizzling attraction and undeniable passion.
Tom and I had the perfect office romance...until one day, well, we didn’t. I wasn’t sure how I was suddenly swept away. Now I was lifting my head up off the floor. Wounded pride aside, my knight in shining armor had picked work over me. CEO or Jenna? It was an obvious choice. I wasn’t worth fighting for. He just dumped me flat on my butt. Our office heat turned into a big ice cube.
Man, did that feel crappy.
Normal breakups suck, but office breakups... They’re a whole new ballgame. We jumped right into the pot, keeping everyone in the dark. The chemistry and heat were in every touch and kiss, the attraction undeniable. We both knew it was wrong, yet, we couldn’t stop ourselves. And now we’d broken up. Was I setting myself up for heartbreak?
I’m still wondering how to fix my life and get it back to normal.
I walked into the break room for my normal ten a.m. break. After pouring a little milk in my coffee, I stirred it as my thoughts wandered off to Tom. My life was falling to pieces. I wasn’t a robot. I had a heart. And it hurt badly. I needed to stay away from Tom and give myself some room. I couldn’t blame him because we didn’t work as a couple. So I needed to stop analyzing what when wrong. I tuned out Joan and Bob whining about having to get expense reports done by the end of the day.
I didn’t want a fling. I wanted so much more. Women want commitment like men want sex. But I can’t help that’s what I want. I just want one guy that makes me smile and feel special. I wasn’t meant to date three guys. That just wasn’t programmed into my DNA. Darn Cupid in the workplace! Take your stupid arrow back!
I’ve learned two things about dating: You can’t meet a guy at the office water cooler or a barstool.
It was over. I needed to be strong enough to let go.
I will find my soul mate one day... Even if it’s an entire house of cats when I’m fifty.
“Jenna,” the guy in accounting said.
“Hi, Bob.”
“Two words. I need two words that describe your life. It’s for the Larchwood newsletter. Mine is ‘deliriously happy’. Anyway, I’ve got everyone but you.”
“Two words, huh?”
“Yeah.”
I bit my lip as I pondered. “Life’s complicated.”
“That’ll work.” Smiling, he wrote it down and darted off.
“Hey, girl,” Betty said. “Be strong. Hang in there, okay? If you need me, I’m here.”
My jaw dropped. My heart started to beat furiously. How the heck did she know? I racked my mind over it. Was Tom blabbing? Or was it Michael? I knew Rose wouldn’t say anything. Unless somebody accidently heard her?
“You know what Tom did?” I managed to get out.
She nodded. “Well, yeah. We all do.”
I could feel the tears welling up, but I refused to let them spill. If I fell apart at work, my colleagues would doubt my professionalism as well as my ability to cope with stress. I’d be remembered as the emotionally unreliable girl who went to pieces when her boyfriend broke up with her. No, I had to stay strong. I wanted to get to the point where this breakup didn’t bother me. But how would that ever happen if everyone knew?
Unbearable awkwardness. I had officially tarnished my professional reputation. The gossip mill will go berserk! I’ll probably be front page news on the newsletter. HR will be on my butt! Why didn’t Tom keep his mouth shut?
Take a breather, Jenna. Your main goal is to stay sane...and employed. I needed to proceed with maximum caution.