Whoever doesn’t take up his cross and follow me doesn’t deserve to be my disciple. The person who tries to preserve his life will lose it, but the person who loses his life for me will preserve it.
Matthew 10:38–39
A lot of times the things you do to “save” your life actually destroy it. When you cut, purge, or abuse yourself in any way, you falsely believe that this act might just fix you or save you. Unfortunately the exact opposite is true: these things are sure to give you pain and suffering. It’s a good trick of the enemy to get you to take a lie and make it your reality. But it’s a gift of God to break up those lies and show you the real truth that will set you free.
The truth is that you don’t find your salvation in one more cut on your leg or pound off your stomach. But when you try to find your life you lose it, and if you lose your life for Christ’s sake, you find it (see Matt. 10:39).
To lose your life for Christ means that you are so concerned about serving him, loving him, and telling others about him that your feelings can’t dissuade you or get you off track. When you give up your need to be anything other than his disciple, you find more life than you could ever imagine.
The greatest thing you can do isn’t to soothe your suffering but to offer it to God. Jesus didn’t run away or try to soothe his pain; the gospel required that he endure suffering for you. And you can’t hide or medicate your pain with the lie that hurting yourself will bring you any kind of salvation at all. Salvation comes from the wounds of Jesus. Nothing you do can improve on that. Jesus promises that if you give up your life by giving up your need to stop the pain, you will find your life. The lies you believe are not giving you what they promise. Walk away now and turn to the cross, and you will find your salvation.