37

EMAIL SOS

By ten o’clock they were all yawning. Danny picked up his panniers and, with a shy “thank you” to Wendy and Kyle, headed for the guest bedroom. Kyle and Wendy headed for their bedroom, too. Wendy stepped into her office, saying over her shoulder to Kyle, “I’ll be along in a jiffy. I just want to check my email.”

She sat down at her desk, totally happy. She was tired, but this would only take five minutes. With eyes half-closed, she clicked to bring up her mail. It wasn’t a long list; all names she knew with a subject line that said “Happy Ho-Ho-Ho,” or something else that told her the message would probably be a holiday e-card. But one subject line, all caps, jumped out at her like a shout: “HELP HELP HELP!”

Wendy immediately recognized the name. Although she had met the person only once, it was not a name you’d forget: Diamond Fontaine.

Lady Diamond, as the woman called herself, was a well-known country singer who, back when Wendy was working at Red River Ranch, had come to one of her classes on how to care for exotic animals in captivity. The woman showed up in designer jeans, high-heeled boots, and diamonds just about any place you could put a diamond. She looked so out of place at the ranch that Wendy wanted to laugh. But when Lady Diamond stayed after the lecture to ask more questions, Wendy learned that she was smart and serious — serious, that is, about buying some kind of exotic cat.

Lady Diamond showed Wendy photos of an enclosure she had built on her estate for an exotic cat she didn’t even own yet. Wendy looked at the pictures and felt jealous. The huge enclosure was beautifully landscaped with tropical foliage. For any exotic animal faced with a lifetime in captivity, this was as good as it got.

Although Wendy didn’t want to encourage anyone to keep exotic cats in captivity, she did respect people who did their homework and were prepared to give their animals the right kind of care. Lady Diamond had driven all the way from Nashville to learn what she could at Red River Ranch, so all Wendy said was, “You know, it’s not like adopting a child, because a child will grow up. Any animal you get will require love and attention for as long as it lives. Maintaining an exotic cat is hugely expensive.”

Lady Diamond had looked her straight in the eyes and said, “Honey, I’ve already been through three husbands, and I am not going to be famous forever. When I’m over the hill, I want a beautiful animal who thinks I’m still beautiful, whether I am or not.”

That one meeting with Lady Diamond was two years ago. Wendy hadn’t heard from her since. Now out of the blue there was this email shouting, “Help Help Help!” She read the message. The gist of it was that Lady Diamond had got a pair of ocelots.

“Ocelots!” Wendy exclaimed out loud. “They’re an endangered species! It’s illegal for a private person to buy one!”

That, she learned as she read on, was the problem. Lady Diamond had bought them, at a cost of $10,000 each. The dealer claimed he had a special permit that allowed him to breed and sell ocelots, and could get a permit for Lady Diamond, too. But it was a scam. Only zoos and wildlife sanctuaries could get permits to keep ocelots. The wildlife authorities trying to stop illegal traffic in exotic species had caught the dealer. Now they were going after people who had bought ocelots from him — including Lady Diamond.

The email ended with Lady Diamond’s phone number, and a plea for Wendy to call her as soon as possible. Wendy glanced at the clock. It was after ten, but the message did say, “Call me collect, day or night.” Wendy picked up the phone.

It was an hour before the conversation ended, Lady Diamond having done most of the talking. When Wendy slipped into bed next to Kyle, he murmured sleepily, “Who were you on the phone with so long?”

“Go back to sleep,” Wendy whispered. “I’ll tell you all about it in the morning.”

• • •

Wendy woke to strains of “Wild Thing.” Radar, apparently having found someone to squeeze the paw of his musical leopard, was sitting on her stomach with the toy in his mouth. Wendy shoved him off, went to the bathroom, and got dressed. Then she went downstairs, Radar pattering along behind, carrying the stuffed animal.

In the kitchen she found Kyle teaching Danny how to make pancakes. Or rather, he was teaching Danny how to flip pancakes in the air and catch them coming down. From the mess on the stove top it looked like more practice was needed. But quite a few, Wendy saw, had made it from pan to plate, and lay there waiting for melted butter and maple syrup.

“So?” Kyle said as he and Danny slid into their seats at the table. “Who was the mystery caller and what did she want?”

“Lady Diamond Fontaine. And no, she’s not a British Royal, although I gather she is married to a Lord somebody, which is where the ‘Lady’ comes from. She lives in Nashville and recently got nailed for the illegal purchase of two ocelots.” Wendy poured syrup over her pancakes and continued, “She said she thought she was getting them legally, and I’m pretty sure that’s true. Lady Diamond took the dealer’s word that the sale was legal but it wasn’t, and the U.S. Wildlife Department has come after her.”

“She’s going to jail?” Danny asked, wide-eyed. “For buying ocelots?”

“Not this time. Since it’s her first offence, she’s being let off with a twenty-thousand-dollar fine. But there is a catch.”

Kyle cut his eyes in Danny’s direction. “The catch, Danny, will be that the cats have to come live here, and Wendy will have to look after them, at her own expense, for the rest of their natural lives.”

“Close,” Wendy said. “But it’s actually a better deal than that.”

“You’re going to get ocelots?” Danny exclaimed. “Real ocelots?”

“If we’re going to get them, I hope they’re real,” Kyle quipped. “And don’t play the same song over and over.”

“Not them, him.” Wendy explained. “Lady Diamond is being allowed to keep the pair she bought illegally, mainly because she is taking excellent care of them and the enclosure she had built for them is enormous and landscaped like a tropical rainforest. There’s no place the authorities could put them that would be half as nice. The catch is that the pair has had a kitten and she is not being allowed to keep it. Not only is it illegal to own ocelots without a permit which is very hard to get, it’s illegal to breed them without a permit, which is even harder to get. But the kitten has already been born, so what to do? They won’t let her keep it and she is not allowed to sell it. She is being required to donate it to somebody with a licensed facility who is doing conservation work. Since I’m a licensed wildlife rehabber, I qualify.”

“Couldn’t it go to a zoo?” Kyle asked.

“Lady Diamond doesn’t think zoo facilities aren’t nice enough. When I gave that class at Red River, I made a big deal about how anybody who keeps an exotic in captivity should at the very least not keep it in a cage, but in a large landscaped enclosure where it can live comfortably and have plenty of privacy. And that’s exactly what Lady Fontaine wants for her little Santiago.”

“That’s its name?” Danny asked. “Santiago?”

“Santiago, yes. And it looks like he’s coming here to live.”

“When’s she bringing him?” Kyle asked.

“I have to go get him up,” Wendy said, forking another pancake onto her plate.

“You’re driving to Nashville? That’s at least seven hours,” Kyle pointed out.

“Not driving, flying. It’s only an hour by air. Lady Fontaine said she’d have a ticket waiting for me at the Little Rock airport tomorrow morning. She’ll meet me in the Nashville airport with Santiago and all the required paperwork. All I have to do is call the U.S. Fish and Wildlife agent she dealt with and make sure I have their approval for her to give me the ocelot, and get the Arkansas Game and Fish office to fax me a state transport permit.”

“She seems in an awful big hurry to get rid of that animal,” Kyle commented, as he poured himself a second cup of coffee.

“She’s afraid the authorities might change their mind and confiscate him outright, and then she won’t have any say in where he goes,” Wendy explained. “She thinks if he comes here she can visit him whenever she likes. And of course she can. But she probably never will. Especially since, now that she has paid that humongous fine, they’re letting her keep the two she bought illegally. This one does sound like handful, but he is just a kitten. How bad can he be?”