The Summit had gone great. All of the alphas had expressed their understanding about the time I’d let lapse in between meetings, and every report I’d received had been satisfactory. Still, a day later, I’d felt unsettled, and my wolf was tense and on edge. It could have something to do with the conversation that I knew my mother had with Lenny and Janine, but it was possible that it was something else entirely. I’d let nearly a week pass since I’d been to visit Janine at the pupcare while I’d organized and hosted The Summit in an effort to focus. I’d been successful at that, but when Lenny pulled her into the meeting hall, I found myself wondering what I’d been thinking that made me stay away from her.
That kiss we’d shared in that office might have been the answer I’d needed, but now that The Summit had passed and her taste was still on my tongue, it was past time for me to pay her a visit. Once again, Alicia was absent from the front. In the multipurpose room, Fancy waved at me, but it looked more like she was trying to get my attention so I waited for her to speak to the other room monitor before stepping around the little ones to make her way over to me.
“Hey, Langston. I’m glad you’re here.”
The thread of anxiety in her voice concerned me. “What’s going on?”
“Janine has been in a state of melancholy since yesterday, and the babies are feeling it. You know how sensitive they are; they’ve been lethargic and weepy, and it’s just been unbearable.”
My brows knitted together. That must have been what was troubling my wolf. Fancy continued, “Can you please take her home and fix whatever the problem is? She probably just needs a pick me up—a little afternoon delight. Have you been holding out or something?”
When I realized what she was asking me, I laughed. “Come on, Fancy. We’re not on that.” Not yet, at least.
She gave me a disbelieving look. “I’ve seen you up here more in the past six weeks than I have in the past six years.”
However true that was, it didn’t automatically equate to sex. I smirked, shaking my head at her knowing eyes. “Okay, Fancy. I’ll talk to you later.”
“Mmhm, hopefully not until way later. If you know what I mean.” She pursed her lips before walking further into the room, leaving me to shake my head in amusement at her brazen assumption.
I continued further into the pupcare, following the now familiar hallway until I came to the baby room. As soon as I approached the open door, I felt what Fancy was talking about. There was a heavy feeling of confusion and sadness permeating the space. Several whimpers and cries could be heard from outside the room, and I stepped inside to see just what was going on. I found her in the middle of changing diapers. Her back was to me as she stood at the dresser against the wall and worked as if on autopilot. When she finished with the baby in front of her, she returned him to the playpen in the corner of the room and made her way over to the rocking chair a few feet away. After watching her for a few minutes, I had seen enough. Stepping inside of the room, I shoved my hands into my pockets.
“Are you ready for your lunch break?”
Janine swept startled eyes over to me, and I could see with my own eyes just how bad a shape that she was in. There were dark circles under her tired eyes, and her hair didn’t have the same luster that it usually did, as if she had forgotten to add moisturizer to it that morning. She jumped up and hurried past me to reclaim her stance at the dresser where she began to fold cloth diapers.
“What are you doing here?”
I stared at her back, observing the lines of tension that I planned to erase as soon as I was given the opportunity. “I came to check on you.”
She cut a glance at me over her shoulder. “Did Fancy call you?”
“No. Your wolf did.”
Her eyes widened before dropping back down to her task. I waited for her to refute my claim but she didn’t.
“Come on. Let me feed you.”
She turned her wrist to check her watch, then continued folding the cloth diapers. “It’s not time for my lunch yet.”
“It’s within an hour; it’ll be okay if you leave a little earlier than usual.”
“That’s okay, but thanks for the offer.”
I frowned at her dismissive tone. “Damn, are you going to make me beg?”
That caught her attention. She dropped the thick piece of fabric in her hand and turned toward me. Propping her hands on her hips, she arched an eyebrow.
“Now, that I’d like to see.”
Without hesitation, I dropped to my knees and scooted toward her, a canine whimper in the back of my throat. When I reached her, I wrapped my arms around her waist and whined low in my throat. She tried to push me away, but I held on tight, continuing to beg until she was full on laughing. Suddenly, the high pitched sound of tinny howling startled me. Both Janine and I looked over in the corner to see all five babies with their noses in the air as they attempted to mimic my whine.
“Look what you started!” Janine cried as she finally managed to push me away from her and rushed over to the playpen. I watched in amusement as she scooped two babies into her arms and started bouncing them around the room while shushing them.
Just as I stood and began to walk toward her, Fancy appeared in the door with her face pinched in exasperation.
“Seriously, Langston?!”
I laughed, lifting my hands in the air as a sign of innocence. “It wasn’t me.”
Janine glared at me. “It absolutely was him! He started whining, and the babies just hopped on the train.” She shook her head, but there was still a ghost of a grin on her face.
“If you’d just come with me when I first asked, instead of making me beg, this never would have happened.”
She gasped and looked over at Fancy, whose brows were raised in amusement. “Don’t look at me. I’m just an innocent bystander. Carry on.” She glanced around the room then tapped her chin. “On second thought, give me these babies and go somewhere with this man so he can put a smile on your face.”
Janine started to protest, but Fancy cut her off.
“Nope. I don’t want to hear it. You’ve been so lost in your thoughts that you haven’t even realized that you’re over here folding dirty diapers.” She pointed to the pile of stained cloths on the changing table and bucked her eyes animatedly.
My own eyes widened. I had been so caught up with trying to get Janine to leave with me that I hadn’t noticed that either.
“Crap.” She closed her eyes briefly before releasing a resigned sigh and handing the two babies in her arms over to Fancy.
Fancy winked at her. “Thanks, doll. I don’t want to see you back today.”
Janine blinked and took a step back. “I can’t come back to work?”
Unperturbed by the disbelief in Janine’s voice, she shook her head. “I don’t want to see you back today. I will, however, be glad to see your beautiful, smiling face bright and early tomorrow morning. Now, go. Get!”
Janine was quiet as we walked to my truck and silent as I drove us away from town and toward the ranch. If she was surprised to see that we were at my house instead of at the diner, she didn’t show it. I led her inside and instructed her to have a seat at the kitchen table while I pulled out last night’s pot of chili and scooped some into a small saucepan to reheat over the stove. I kept one eye on her the entire time, though she didn’t seem to be going anywhere. Her arms were folded in front of her as she stared out the picture window beside the table, her attention outside in the pasture.
“Want to talk about it?”
She sighed. “What is there to say?”
I heaped ladles of chili into two bowls and slid one in front of her before taking a seat next to her at the table.
“You could start by telling me what’s on your mind right this minute.”
She stared down into her bowl, dragging her spoon through its contents. “I’m thinking that if this is true—”
“It is,” I interjected, wanting to be sure that she understood that my mother hadn’t been guessing when she made the declaration.
She aimed a sidelong glance at me. “Mm. What I mean is I’ve been consistently manipulated for the past ten years. The Elders orchestrated my mating with Brix under the guise that I was helping him become the Alpha, but if I was already an Alpha, what were they trying to do? That’s what has me so confounded. What was their goal?” She dropped her spoon and sat back in her chair with a look of wonderment on her face.
“Now that I think about it, how in the hell was mating supposed to make him an Alpha? Especially if I was just a normal wolf like they insisted on reminding me. Did they know what I was? What I am. Ugh! Nothing makes sense anymore.”
I chewed my food, wishing I had some reassuring words for her at the moment. I couldn’t imagine being a kid and not knowing that I was an alpha. A conversation with my father when I was nine cleared up what could have been years of confusion for me. A thought occurred to me.
“Did you never wonder about the power you had?”
She tilted her head but didn’t look at me. “What power?”
“To control. Whenever you were angry enough or possessed strong emotions, didn’t you ever notice how it affected the people around you?” The power of an alpha was undeniable, even if you didn’t know what it was. It was what made an alpha an alpha. I’d been witness to Janine’s raw power and had heard about it on more than one occasion since she’d been in Madow. I found it hard to believe that these three months were the first manifestations of a power that usually presented itself during preteen years. From the contemplative look on her face, I could see that she was thinking back over instances in her life and seeing them with new eyes.
“I—well…” She looked at me. “When I was nine, my mother took me to the park and—while playing—I got into an argument with another girl. I don’t remember what it was about, probably something stupid like who had next on the swings or something, but I do remember screaming at her to go home. She turned around and walked away, I mean, she walked right off of the playground and out of the park. That night, my mother tucked me into bed and told me that I had to be mindful of the way I spoke to people. She told me that even at my young age, my words had power and the greatest thing I would learn to do in life was use that power to help instead of hurt.”
I reached over and swiped my thumb at a tear that fell from the corner of her eye.
“That was the only time I can remember her saying something about that. When I moved into the Elders’ home they never mentioned it, and eventually, I forgot about it.” She groaned, scrubbing her face with her hands. “I can’t believe how gullible I was!”
“Hey.” I grabbed the seat of her chair and twisted it until she was facing me. “Trusting the authority figures in your life to take care of you doesn’t make you gullible. It’s an intrinsic part of our makeup. The Elders represented what an alpha would have been in your pack, so it would never occur to you—or anyone—to question them. That’s not your fault.” She nibbled on her lip but held my gaze. I ducked my head. “You know that, right?”
Her shoulders lifted and her chest rose as she inhaled, and when she released her breath, I felt her simultaneously release all of the tension and frustration that she’d been holding on to. Lifting her hand to my mouth, I kissed her knuckles and squeezed her hand before I stood and carried my empty bowl to the sink to rinse it out. With my back to her, I gripped the counter tightly. The words that hung on the tip of my tongue would no doubt sound eight kinds of crazy, but there was no way I could contain them. If nothing else, Janine deserved to know how I felt. And… I needed her to hear it. This dance had dragged on far too long and spending any more length of time without her knowing that she was mine, that she belonged with me—belonged to me—was not about to happen.
“I’m glad you didn’t know you were an alpha.”
I expected the silence that came. It had stretched on for a full minute before she responded.
“Why is that, Langston?” Her tone was even, not giving me an inclination into her mood, as if she was asking me for something as mundane as today’s special at the diner instead of requesting clarification for my shitty announcement.
I turned to face her, my fingers pressing into the counter behind me so hard, I feared I would shatter the wood. But I didn’t loosen my grip. I couldn’t. I was holding on for dear life, trying my damnedest not to launch across the island and sweep her into my arms. Every day that passed, every moment I spent in her presence made me want her that much more, and I wasn’t foolish enough to pretend I didn’t know what this was. My wolf had spoken the moment my eyes met hers, and whether I had chosen to listen or not, the truth remained the same. I met her questioning eyes with my own.
“If you had known what you were, you would have acquired a pack a long time ago and… you wouldn’t have made your way to Madow.”
A myriad of emotions swirled in those bourbon browns as the last words fell from my lips, but the one that stood out the most—the one that accompanied an enticing scent that had my wolf and my dick stand at attention—was lust. Her arousal at my admittance wafted over my nose and nearly bowled me over, calling to my wolf in an irresistible way. My grip tightened on the counter, and I definitely heard the sound of the wood cracking beneath my palms. Her eyes flicked from my face to my hands then back to my face once more, surely noticing the prominent lines of tension that were my jawline.
“What are you fighting?”
I chuckled. She had to know what she was doing to me. Had to!
“Janine,” I ground out. “Don’t play with me right now.”
She stood, circling the table slowly like I was prey and she was hunting me, and came to a stop just out of my arm’s reach. “That was a real question. Why would you tell me that you’re glad I’m here then… do this?” She gestured to my hands curled around the edge of the counter.
“I just want to make sure you’re ready. This was selfish of me. You just came to a massive realiz—”
“Ask me.”
I blinked, processing the words that she’d cut me off with.
“Ask. Me.” She repeated, chewing on the inside of her cheek. The nervous tic was the only indication that she was anything other than confident in this moment.
“Are you—”
“Yes,” she breathed. Then she shifted her weight subtly, and I released the counter, stepping forward a split second before she launched herself at me. I caught her easily, gripping her thighs as they came to rest on my waist, causing the scent of her arousal to intensify. Her arms found purchase around my neck, and I had us upstairs and in my bedroom in record time.
The moment the door closed behind me, she started ripping at my shirt until it fell from my shoulders. My tongue found the smooth column of her neck, and I licked a trail from just below her ear, down to her collarbone, where I covered the skin with my mouth and sucked until the blood rushed to the surface. Knowing some semblance of a mark would be visible on her tomorrow gave me a modicum amount of pleasure, though my wolf wasn’t satisfied. That’s not the right mark, he said. And though he wasn’t wrong, now wasn’t the time for that. I was only now getting a chance to taste her, to touch her, to have her beneath me—an official mating could wait.
I sat her on the bed and tried to stand back so that I could finish undressing but a snarl rose in her throat as her hands yanked the waistband of my jeans toward her, and I remained where I was. Standing still so she could finish the job she started, I waited until my pants hit the ground before climbing over her. She scooted backward, to the middle of my bed, but her eyes were on my dick as her scent all but choked the restraint out of my body. I’d wanted to take my time and explore every inch of the beautiful body I’d tried hard not to stare at after we’d shifted together, but it seemed like now wasn’t the time for that either.
I attacked her mouth with the same ferocity that I attacked her clothing, none too gently stripping the articles from her body in my haste to reach my prize. And what a prize she was. The moment she kicked the last leg of her pants off and shimmied out of her underwear, she pushed forward, shoving me on my back and climbed on top of me to straddle my waist. She leaned down, hands on my chest, with eyes that had darkened to a chocolate brown, glittering at me.
“I know you didn’t think you were running this show.” Her lips—which were curved into a sexy smirk—parted with a gasp when I reached up and smack one of her juicy cheeks.
“I might have… but I should have known better.” I slid my hands up her thighs until they rested on her hips. “Show me what you’re working with, Alpha.”
Her brow quirked and something in her eyes told me that she had every intention of taking me up on the challenge that I had just unintentionally issued. While holding my gaze, she reached between us and gripped my steely erection from its resting place on my belly and straightened it, brushing the head against her entrance. I bit my lip, wanting to watch myself disappear inside of her, but refusing to tear my eyes from her intense stare. When she sank down onto to me in one smooth move, her jaw slackened and whatever sound fell out of her mouth was drowned out by my own husky moan of satisfaction. If we simply stayed like this for the next half hour, I would still be pleased.
Janine had no intentions of holding still, however, and immediately began to bounce on my dick with an enthusiasm I appreciated. Her eyes rolled to the ceiling, and I finally directed my attention to our joining. The sight of her swallowing me completely over and over again painted an erotic image. She was soaked and my dick glistened with her natural lubrication. If she kept this up, I’d be finished in minutes. Stiffening my hands on her hips, I attempted to slow her down, but she snapped her head forward, glaring at me while slapping my hands away from her totally.
Oh, she really wanted to run the show? Okay. Chuckling, I folded my hands behind my head and commenced to watching her work. That’s when I realized that I’d really fucked up.
She slapped her hands back on my chest and started grinding her hips in tight, slow circles. Every stroke felt like she was sucking my dick into a vacuum, and I thought that maybe I should have just let her bounce her life away and let the chips fall where they may. I reached behind me, grabbing the edge of the mattress while my toes nearly curled into themselves as I felt my orgasm approach. I pressed my head back into the mattress and howled out my release. Not fifteen seconds later, I grunted as her suddenly sharp nails dug into my chest, nicking my skin as she climaxed above me.
I wrapped my arms around her as she retracted her claws and fell forward, her sweat-slicked skin melding with my own. When I felt her tongue on me, I glanced down to see her swiping at the tiny dots of blood her moment of release had left behind, bathing me as she had when we were shifted.
“You don’t have to do that. I have some ointment in the bathroom.”
Finished with her task, she rubbed her nose into my neck and wrapped her arms around my waist.
“It’s okay. I needed to get my scent on you anyway. Now Alicia can stop sniffing around.”
I choked out surprised laughter. That might have been the last thing I expected to come out of her mouth. Pleased with her show of possessiveness, I couldn’t help but tease her. “Wow, I can’t believe you’re marking me under the guise of helping me. I don’t know how to feel right now.”
She giggled, raking her now blunt nails down my side. “Keep it up and I’m going to rub my naked pussy across your whole body. Forehead to feet.”
I squeezed her against me, loving the feel of still being connected to her and wondering how I could stretch this moment out for the rest of the day. “Don’t tease me with a good time, baby.”