Chapter Thirty-Four: The Miracle of Osaka
“Russia in big trouble, it seem,” Feodora said. The three of them were watching live coverage on their TCs. Within hours, the surrounded Russian forces would either surrender or be slaughtered. Chinese forces had already turned north, taking Khabarovsk, another major Russian city. There was little to stop them from marching through much of southwest Russia.
“I hate to think in political terms at a time like this,” Toby said, “but what the hell happened? How could Russia miscalculate this badly? Now Ajala’s gonna sweep everywhere, Dubois will take China, and we’ll be back to running mayoral elections.”
“I think you’re completely wrong on this,” Bruce said. “After this, nobody’s going to hire us to run a mayoral campaign.”
“Gentlemen,” Feodora said, “Bruce is correct. Nobody is going to hire you to run a mayoral campaign because you will be too busy running world government.”
Toby stared at her. Had his vice presidential candidate gone completely mad?
Bruce was a bit more direct. “Are you insane?”
Feodora smiled. “Always have backup plan.”
“A backup plan?” Bruce said. “I once played the world champion table tennis player. I was getting killed, but I had a backup plan. I faked an injury and defaulted.”
“I have better backup plan,” Feodora said. “Russian military big disappointment—many generals with big, cushy desks may soon be working from Siberian igloos, while small general may get demoted from ambassador to old job of supreme commander again. But when military fails, you do next best thing: diplomacy. Tomorrow I meet with Chinese and Japanese generals, and negotiate agreement.”
“It seems to me,” Bruce said, “that diplomacy works best when you have a hand to play. China and Japan have all the aces, and all you have are deuces. You have nothing to negotiate with.”
“You forget the secret to diplomacy,” Feodora said with a slight smile. “If only have deuces, make sure deuces are wild.”
* * *
Feodora studied the inscrutable face of General Kubo, the Japanese High Commander. He looked gleeful, though you had to look closely at his granite face to see it. General Chou of China made no attempt to hide the victorious grin on his face.
“General Zubkov, we agreed to meet with you because of your high standing with the Russian people,” Kubo said.
What he means, Feodora thought, is that you humiliated us nine years ago, and now it’s our turn. “And I asked to meet with you to work out amicable settlement of Kim crisis.”
The two rival generals exchanged glances. Like Toby and Bruce, they thought she was crazy. Many past opponents had thought that, but those that still lived did not hold that opinion.
“It’s not Kim,” Chou said. “It’s North Korea.”
“Really,” Feodora said. They seemed to expect her to say more, so she didn’t.
After an uncomfortable silence, Kubo said. “Let’s review the situation. Do you agree, from a military standpoint, that if the Russian troops in North Korea do not surrender, we can destroy them? Is that a fair assessment, General Zubkov?”
Feodora only smiled.
“I’ll take that as agreement,” Kubo said. “Do you also agree, again from a military standpoint, that we can take out quite a bit of Russian territory, and hold it? That the combined Japanese-Chinese troops are stronger than Russia’s, and are in a better strategic position?”
Again, Feodora only smiled.
Chou angered visibly. “We came here at your request, and all you do is grin like a chimpanzee. General Kubo, we are wasting our time here.”
Kubo was studying Feodora’s face; she stared back, neither backed down. Finally he spoke. “There’s something going on that we don’t know about. You wouldn’t ask to meet with us otherwise. But I have to agree with my colleague that we’re wasting time here if all you’re going to do is smile at us.”
It was showtime, Feodora thought. “General Chou, it is funny you mention chimpanzee. I have friend who also calls others chimpanzees, because he is smarter than almost everyone else. The danger is that when one thinks of others as chimpanzees, one risks not recognizing a smarter chimpanzee.”
“Based on what I’ve seen so far,” Chou said, “and using your own analogy, the Russians who brought about this situation are the chimpanzees.”
“The question,” Kubo said, “is whether there is a smarter chimpanzee. Are you that smarter chimpanzee, General Zubkov?”
Feodora was tempted to screech like a chimpanzee in victory, but restrained herself. “General Kubo, do you know the ten largest cities in Japan?”
There was silence as Kubo stared at her, his granite face now a bit rockier than before. Feodora knew that he knew that somehow, someway, with that seemingly meaningless question, the tables had just been turned.
“I could probably name them,” Kubo said.
“Why is this important?” Chou said. Kubo gave him a look, and Chou, who seemed to have more to say, instead leaned back in his chair.
“Choose one,” Feodora said.
“Why?”
Feodora only smiled.
After minute, Kubo said, “Osaka.”
“Osaka,” Feodora repeated. “Is your family from Osaka?” Kubo nodded. “Weren’t you worried I would set one off in Osaka?”
“No,” said Kubo. “That would have been dishonorable.”
Feodora scribbled an address on a piece of paper and handed it to Kubo. She’d memorized all ten addresses. “Choose your most trusted aide in Osaka, and have him go to this address. Have him look for closet in basement. Tear down the back of the closet, and he’ll find secret compartment. Have him tell you what he finds.” She would handle this differently than the Korean Gang of Three in 2045 and Truman a hundred years before that.
Two hours later, they reached an agreement. Chou was reticent, but didn’t want to take on Russia without Japanese support. Kubo and Chou agreed to withdraw out of Kim—they no longer called it North Korea—and to support Kim’s entry into the Russian Federation.
In return, Feodora pledged Russian support for future Japanese sovereignty over South Korea—she suggested they just call it “Korea”—and for China in its ongoing boundary disputes with Mongolia and Nepal. They also agreed to future meetings to set up a Russia-China-Japan free trade zone.
It had been a short but costly enterprise, she thought, with over fifteen hundred dead for the three countries. There had been many civil wars throughout history with far more deaths to keep a country together; how was that different from a war to bring a country together? It had taken 109 years to put the Soviet Union back together again. It had deserved its prior fate. This time, she thought, let’s do it right. She vowed to visit the grave of every soldier who died for all three countries.
It had been worth giving up the location of the hidden nuke in Osaka, even if it meant Japan now had one. Japan’s open society had made the smuggling relatively easy. The other nine would remain hidden, and would never be used. She hoped.
* * *
“How the hell did you pull this off?” Bruce asked. Already the media was giving nonstop coverage of the agreement, with satellite photos of the Japanese and Chinese troops pulling out. There had been over a thousand Russian deaths in the short struggle, and about half that number for the combined Japanese and Chinese forces.
“It’s all about diplomacy,” Feodora said.
“You said the secret to diplomacy was to have wild deuces,” Toby said.
“Did I say that?”
“Yes!” Toby and Bruce said together.
“Well, if you say so, then I must have. But really, I mostly just smiled at them. That won them over.” Despite their persistence, she only smiled and refused to say more.
“I have a question about this war,” said Twenty-two. “When these human countries fought, they didn’t use nuclear bombs. Why not?”
“Because if they did,” Toby said, “then the other side would also use them, and both sides would get destroyed and lose. Whoever uses a nuclear bomb first knows they’ll get destroyed in retaliation.”
“It’s called ‘mutual assured destruction,’” Bruce said, “the idea being both sides survive unless one side wants the other side dead more than they want to live.”
“So both sides only fight hard enough to maybe win, but not hard enough to make the other too mad, so that win or lose they survive? That is smart; we have same concept. But is there no oversight to make sure the country that is right wins?”
“Whoever wins is always right,” said Feodora. “Winners write history books.”
When Feodora spoke to the media, she gave Toby full credit for the agreement. “He tell me what to say, what to do. That is why he is running for president, while small general only run for vice president. He may be hated American,” and she paused to allow laughter, “but because of him, we have peace. Later, we meet in Osaka to set up free trade agreements between Russia, Japan and China. So we will call what Toby did…‘The Miracle of Osaka.’”
* * *
Tuesday, September 7, was election day. That night, Toby, Bruce, and Feodora met in her Moscow apartment.
“To Russia’s new national hero!” a slightly drunk Feodora said, raising a glass of Russian New Vodka.
“You realize that alcohol is illegal everywhere on the planet?” Toby said, still not quite used to being the toast of the Russian Federation. Of course, his status would change quite a bit when they flew to China later that night.
“You bet it is,” Feodora said. “Drink up!”
“To world domination!” Bruce said, holding up his vodka.
Toby raised his as well, and they all drank to celebrate. For they had much to celebrate.
| Russian Federation | Electoral Votes | Dubois | Ajala | Platt |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Armenia | 1 | 29% | 38% | 43% |
| Azerbaijan | 2 | 21% | 39% | 40% |
| Belarus | 1 | 25% | 47% | 28% |
| Cuba | 1 | 26% | 44% | 30% |
| Estonia | 1 | 23% | 39% | 38% |
| Georgia | 1 | 31% | 34% | 35% |
| Kazakhstan | 2 | 19% | 34% | 47% |
| Kyrgyzstan | 1 | 17% | 40% | 43% |
| Latvia | 1 | 32% | 35% | 33% |
| Lithuania | 1 | 20% | 41% | 39% |
| Moldavia | 1 | 25% | 36% | 39% |
| Russia | 14 | 17% | 31% | 52% |
| Tajikistan | 2 | 17% | 41% | 42% |
| Turkmenistan | 1 | 27% | 36% | 37% |
| Ukraine | 5 | 25% | 39% | 36% |
| Uzbekistan | 5 | 35% | 27% | 38% |
| TOTAL | 40 | 0 | 10 | 30 |
Dubois had been shut out. Ajala won Cuba, Belarus, Ukraine, and the Baltic states—Estonia, Latvia, and Lithuania—for a total of ten electoral votes. Toby had swept the rest for thirty electoral votes: Russia, Armenia, Azerbaijan, Georgia, Kazakhstan, Kyrgyzstan, Moldavia, Tajikistan, Turkmenistan, and Uzbekistan.
Though Kim was now a part of the Russian Federation, it would vote in the Asian Federation election this time around. Toby was pretty sure he’d win Kim’s three electoral votes, but the Asian Federation vote wasn’t until week six. It seemed like they had campaigned forever, and yet they’d just finished week three. Week four would be China, followed by United Europe.
“I bet I could win in the U.S. if they ran the election now,” Toby said. “Heck, maybe we really can win this thing!”
“Maybe,” Feodora said. “But you win here because of this old lady, and you win in Canada because of another old lady. Soon you must learn to win without old ladies.”
The electoral count now stood: Dubois 89, Ajala 10…and Platt 36.