The driving rhythm of conga beat behind the door. No one answered my knock. I knocked again, louder this time, rattling the doorknob. “It’s me. Grace. Can you hear me?” After an interminable length of time, hollow footsteps tapped on a wooden floor. The door opened slowly.
“Josie! Where have you been?” I wanted to rush into Josie’s arms and hug her but Josie took a step back. “You know about the kids, right?”
“Yeah, I’m sorry, Grace.” Her voice was hard and raw. “I heard. I just got back. I was gonna call you today.” There was something odd about the way Josie wouldn’t meet my eyes.
“Can I come in? Where are Melanie and the kids?” I looked inside, expecting a mess. Surprisingly, the living room was tidy. There was nothing out of place. The sofa cushions were plump, no stray socks or toys or dirty dishes littered the floor. No suitcases or ticket jackets. My own house was always a mess when the kids were there. Too late, I realized I was thinking about them in past tense. I need to pull myself together. “Wow, you’ve really cleaned up quickly. I still haven’t unpacked. You busy? Is that a new Civic outside?”
“Well …” Josie looked over her shoulder into the living room. It was painted a deep, dark red. “I just got home, but no, come in. They’re out. That’s Melanie’s car. She’s using mine. Has there been any word about the children?” She squeezed my arm. “You must be frantic. Do you want to sit down? Can I get you something to drink?”
“No word yet. I’m not giving up though. Josie, I need to ask you something. Why did you and Caleigh exchange phone numbers?”
Josie shrugged. “Why do you ask?”
“It’s something I just found out and I’m wondering why you never mentioned it to me.” I was ashamed at what I had missed and hurt that my daughter was confiding in Josie without my knowledge.
“We kind of hit it off at the picnic, and I thought maybe she and Melanie’s daughter would enjoy hanging out. It wasn’t a big secret, Grace.”
The red walls were the color of blood. I sunk into the cushions and studied the artwork on the wall opposite me. A life size reproduction of Tamara de Lempika’s painting, The Dream. Josie’s eyes were fixed on it. It was not something I would want to live with every day. “I was at the station just now talking to Detective Meyers, he’s the guy in charge of the investigation.”
“Oh? Are you sure I can’t get you something to drink?” Josie’s eyes darted back and forth to the kitchen.
“No, thanks. I’m supposed to meet Alex outside in a couple of minutes. He has a meeting at work and we came in one car.”
“How is he? And you? How are you holding up?”
“He’s okay. He went back to work. I’ve taken some time off, but I’m going back part time on Monday. It’s been three weeks and I need to do something to keep myself from going crazy. I just can’t stay home by myself all day long anymore.”
“I’m going back tomorrow too.” There was an ashy, grayish quality to Josie’s normally tanned olive complexion. “She’s a beautiful woman, isn’t she?” Josie asked, still staring at the painting.
“I’m not much of an art critic. But, yes, there is something really arresting about her. Something sensual.”
“That was painted in 1927. She also modeled for a painting called Beautiful Rafaela. I have it in my bedroom. It shows a lot more than this one, so I didn’t know if I should hang it in the living room.” Josie laughed nervously. “Anyway, how are you and Alex doing? I mean with all the stress and everything …”
“We’re okay. You had a long vacation, how come you’re so pale? Didn’t you and Melanie get to the beach at all when you were in Puerto Rico?”
Josie grunted something unintelligible.
“I’m sorry, what did you say?” I wondered why Josie wouldn’t meet my gaze.
“I said I had a lot going on. The beach was the last thing on my mind,” she said tersely, her eyes lost in the painting. “I bought my mother a house,” she muttered. “In a suburb of San Juan.”
“Josie! That’s wonderful. This must mean so much to her.”
“She deserves it. But even now she can’t stop worrying …”
“What do you mean?”
“Nothing.” Josie looked at me blankly. “I just meant that she’s worrying about how we’ll pay for it. She keeps it so clean I could eat off the floors.” Josie smiled and said softly, “It’s just what she’s always wanted. Polished terrazzo floors, pastel walls and a huge crucifix in the living room.” She wiped her eyes and fingered the small crucifix around her neck like a nun counting rosary beads.
“So, it wasn’t much of a beach vacation, huh? I heard about Emanuel escaping. Any news about that?”
“Nope.” Josie brushed lint off the sofa.
Her economy of words would have been surprising under any circumstances, considering how forthcoming Josie usually was but now it was shocking. Was it jet lag or fatigue from the trip that had Josie so irritable? Or maybe it was Emanuel’s escape. Something was definitely wrong. “I heard he escaped with someone else. Who was this guy?” Maybe this ruined the vacation for her.
“I don’t know, Grace. So, what happened at the station this morning?”
“Well, I found Caleigh’s diaries and thought I should bring them in to Detective Meyers. The police interviewed Alex’s ex-wife. Actually, would you mind getting me a glass of water? I am kind of thirsty.”
“Sure.” Josie went into the kitchen. Ice cubes clattered into a glass. I looked around the room again and pinpointed what had been bothering me all along. There was absolutely no clutter. No school pictures of Melanie’s kids, or of anyone else, for that matter. Just the life-size painting of the nude. A strange painting to display with teenage children in the house.
Josie handed me the glass. “What’s this about a diary? And Alex’s ex-wife?”
I took a sip and swallowed hard. “When I was in Indonesia with Alex, my motherin-law found little cuts on Caleigh’s arms. She said Caleigh acted strange and didn’t answer when Dahlia asked her about the cuts. She had just seen a program on cutting and was convinced Caleigh was doing it because our puppy disappeared …”
“Your puppy disappeared?” Josie lifted her brows. She had the unblinking eyes of a snake. “What’s the ex-wife have to do with this? Are you really sure that she is an ‘ex-wife’? She did call and say she was still married to the guy.”
“Yes, I’m sure.” Josie’s dislike of Alex was beginning to irritate me. “Oh, Josie, there’s so much I need to fill you in on but Alex is waiting. I need to drop him at the hospital. Can we talk later?”
She brushed her hair back and gave me a sidelong glance. “Sure, but what’s this about a diary? What’d she write?”
“I wanted to ask you about that. She mentioned the cutting. Apparently, it’s been going on since Matt died. I feel terrible. You know, working in the field and not realizing this was going on under my own nose.”
Her lips narrowed. “Wow. What’s up with that, Grace? I’m surprised you didn’t see it. We see it all the time in the prison.” A purplish vein fluttered at her temple.
“I know but it’s different when it’s your own kid. Plus, I was so happy the kids accepted Alex. I was thrilled with the engagement and the trip. Everything seemed to be finally falling into place. You can’t imagine how I feel about this. Really. I feel horrible not to have seen it.”
“It does seem like kind of a big thing to overlook.” There wasn’t a hint of sympathy in her eyes. “Remember I told you something about Alex moving in didn’t seem right to me? I hate to ask you this, but are you sure Alex didn’t have anything to do with this?”
“I can’t believe you just said that.” I was as dumbstruck as if she had slapped me. Maybe the loss of her own children had hardened her in a way I didn’t understand.
“You know I’m only looking out for your own good,” she muttered.
“I’m going to chalk it up to you being a friend and being concerned, but you are absolutely wrong. What’s gotten into you anyway?”
She crossed her arms over her chest and said angrily, “You barely know the guy!”
“Believe me, nobody feels worse about this than I do, but Alex has absolutely nothing to do with it. He’s been a rock.”
“Hey, I’m just trying to look out for you.” Josie flushed the color of her living room walls.
“Thanks but what I wanted to ask was whether you and Caleigh talked about her cutting? She mentioned it in her diary and honestly, I had no idea.”
“Oh, she called me and texted me a couple of times. You know, it was the old ‘my mother doesn’t understand me’ kind of thing. I was glad to help.”
“I’m glad you were there for her when I obviously wasn’t, but does that mean you knew about the cutting?”
Josie shrugged.
It suddenly became clear to me that Josie had known about it. “Didn’t you think it was something you should have told me?” I asked, incredulous.
“She opened up to me and I didn’t want to break her confidence, Grace.”
“Yes, but she’s my daughter.”
“I’m sorry, Grace. I was just trying to help. What did the police say about the diary?”
“I don’t know yet.” I couldn’t believe what Josie had just said. “They’ll analyze it and send it to the forensic psychologist. I really have to go. Alex is waiting. I’ll talk to you soon.” I bumped into Josie’s shoulder as we walked to the door. It was as sharp as a blade. “Have you lost weight?”
“No. I’m the same as ever. Still trying to run whenever I can. I’ll see you Monday, okay?”
Alex was in the car with his eyes closed when I opened the door. “Sleepy?” I kissed him on the cheek.
“Mmm hmm. I took a pain reliever but this shoulder is killing me.”
“Poor baby. We’ve been through a lot. No wonder your shoulder’s acting up and you can’t sleep.”
“Mmmmm. That feels good,” he said as I threaded my fingers around the knot in his shoulder. “Grace, is something wrong? Did you see Josie?”
“Yeah. At first I wondered if she was home, it took her so long to answer the door. She said she’d just gotten back and was going to call me today. She knew about the kids.”
“Maybe she was asleep or something. We’d better get going. I need to be at the Infectious Diseases Symposium today. What’s the matter? You look upset.” Alex backed out of the driveway and turned his head gingerly.
“No, she was dressed. She knew about the kids. And she knew about Caleigh cutting.”
“She knew about Caleigh’s cutting?”
“Yeah,” I looked down. “She said Caleigh had texted her but she didn’t want to break her confidence and tell me.”
“Wow. That’s surprising. Why would she do that?”
“I don’t know. It was poor judgment, don’t you think?”
“Yeah, I do. I think she had a responsibility to tell you.”
“Yeah, me too. I’m glad you don’t think I’m overreacting to this. She looked terrible. I asked if she’d gone to the beach at all in Puerto Rico and she said something about having other things on her mind. I told you that the patient who she escorted to the prison there escaped, right?”
“Was that during the transfer or after he was already in the prison?” Alex asked, turning onto Rocky Creek Drive.
“Oh, afterwards, I think. He escaped with another inmate. It seems there was a plan with a kitchen staff member or something. They haven’t been found yet as far as I know.”
“That’s funny. How could there be a plan to have your patient escape if no one knew he was being transferred back to Puerto Rico?”
“Well, the staff knew. I suppose there’s some sort of underground information that gets around. You know inmates buy and sell cell phones and other contraband. Maybe Venegas somehow alerted this guy, Gutierrez he was returning, as soon as he heard.”
Alex shook his head. “I worry about you, Grace, being in that job.”
“I know. I’ve been thinking that … Now that the children are …”
“That what?” Alex prodded carefully.
“God, this is the second time today that I’ve caught myself thinking, ‘now that the children aren’t at home.’ I can’t lose hope but it’s getting so frustrating. It’s like some horrible evil has chosen us, maybe even watched us and changed our lives forever. I can’t help but wonder if it has something to do with my job.”
“I know, baby. But don’t give up. We’ll keep looking no matter what it takes.”
“Anyway …” I wiped my eyes. There was no way Josie could be right about Alex having anything to do with this. “I’ve been thinking I might give notice at the prison and get another job. After what’s happened, I just don’t think I can be objective about working with people who have been convicted of the horrible sorts of crimes my patients have. Not now that I know how much the victims of those crimes suffer.”
“I know what you mean. Yeah, they’re paying for their crimes but an individual’s or a family’s life has been changed forever by one person’s acts.”
“I agree. There’s a fellowship in Adolescent Psychiatry at Mayo I’ve been thinking about. After what I missed with Caleigh, maybe this is what I need to do. I was surprised by Josie’s reaction though. I told her how horrible I felt about missing the signs and finding out from Caleigh’s diary that she’s been cutting herself for two years.”
“What’d she say?”
“She said we see it all the time and I’d missed the signs. I thought she would be a little more sympathetic. I don’t know, maybe she’s hardened in some way after losing her kids. After she and Melanie got together, there were some problems with Melanie’s kids too.” The last thing I wanted to do was make Alex feel worse by mentioning what Josie said about him moving in.
“Who?” he asked absently.
“Melanie. I told you about her. Josie’s lover. She and Josie are raising her two kids together.”
“Grace, I told you before. Josie and I lived in the same town house community for five years. I’ve never seen anyone entering or leaving her house. I would have noticed if there were kids around. How old are they?”
“What? That’s weird. Maybe you just missed them, that’s all. I think they’re about eleven and fourteen or so. I can’t remember for sure.”
“That place is as quiet as a tomb. You’d think with two kids, eleven and fourteen there’d be a bike outside or they’d throw a ball around in the yard or they’d come outside once in a while.”
We passed the Kahler Inn and Suites and Alex pulled up in front of Mayo Clinic’s Gonda Building on First Street Southwest. “Who knows? Maybe they’re really quiet kids or something. It was weird though that there were no signs of kids in the townhouse. Who knows? Maybe Josie’s a neat freak and their stuff is all in their rooms.”
“Yeah, maybe,” Alex replied noncommittally.
“I have this weird sense of something being off today. Maybe it was seeing Angela. She obviously still has feelings for you. I hope the police keep an eye on her. I feel like we’re so close to an answer.”
Alex leaned over to kiss me goodbye. “Call me and I’ll pick you up tonight after work, okay?” I said.
“I will. We’ll talk about it later, okay? How about a run before dinner?”
“Sure, a run will do me good.”
“I’ll give you a call when I’m done.”