It took two weeks of watering less, incorporating eggshells and manure into the soil, and praying—lots of praying—but Sadie’s heart leapt with joy when she walked out to the garden one morning and noticed the new tomatoes had begun to ripen and were blemish-free.
Sadie let out a long breath. A weight lifted from her shoulders. Thankfully she wasn’t going to be the one who ended the heritage. Instead, she hoped that this would just be part of a humorous story she told to her children and grandchildren someday. She just needed these tomatoes to ripen for a few more days, and then she could harvest their seeds. Then—and only then—would she really be able to breathe a sigh of relief and laugh at herself.
“I can’t believe I ran up to Montana Log Works to tell Eli about my ‘crisis,’” Sadie mumbled to herself. She shook her head, wondering what Eli’s coworkers must have thought of her. Great Tomato Catastrophe, indeed.
She walked to her uncle’s shed to grab her garden gloves, and once inside, she heard what sounded like someone moving around outside. The door behind her creaked open.
Sadie turned. Even though it was early, she expected it to be Eli. He usually visited her after work, but sometimes he surprised her in the early morning too.
Instead, it was Rachel who trembled in the cool morning air, still wearing her nightdress and head scarf.
Sadie quickly took off her sweater and hurried over to the young girl. “Oh, liebling, come in. It’s chilly out there.”
“I had a dream, Sadie.”
Sadie wrapped the sweater around Rachel’s shoulders. The girl’s forehead creased with concern.
“Was it a bad dream?”
“Ja.” Rachel lowered her head. “It was Mem and Dat. They were in an accident.”
“Was it a buggy accident, Rachel, like my mem and dat?”
“Ja.”
“Just because something tragic like that happened once doesn’t mean it’ll happen again.”
“But what if it did happen? Would you stay here with me?”
“Ja, of course. I would never leave you alone.”
“But what if you were married with your own kids?” Rachel’s lower lip trembled. “Mem says that Eli loves you—that she can see it in his eyes.”
Sadie took Rachel’s shoulders and knelt before her. Fear filled her face. She was concerned about the nightmare, but it was her aunt’s belief that Eli loved her that caused the most shock.
“Your mem said that . . . that he loved me?”
“Ja, I heard her and Dat talking. They said they’d be very sad if you married and returned to Indiana. And if you do, who will be here to take care of me?”
“Oh, liebling, you don’t have to worry about that. I don’t think that anything will happen to your parents. Also, I have no plans of going anywhere. Do you understand? And as far as I know, Eli plans to stay here too.”
“Do you mean that?”
Sadie nodded, but was she jumping to conclusions? Eli claimed to like it here. He’d said more than once that Montana was starting to feel like home. But what did that mean for him? What did that mean for them?
“Just go to bed and rest your little heart. Pray to God, and remember that He can sweep all your worries away like the swish of a broom.”
Sadie didn’t know where those words came from, but as she waved Rachel back toward the house and pulled on her garden gloves, she realized she needed those words too. She could either question if Eli did indeed care for her as much as she cared for him, or she could trust that God knew Eli’s heart and had a plan for both of them. He also had a perfect home in mind for her, whether here or another place.
That was one thing she was learning from Eli. To ask for help and then accept it, not only from those around her, but also from God.
Still, she wondered. Are Aunt Linda’s observations correct? Is there truly love in his eyes when he looks at me?
Sadie hoped that tonight she would have some answers. Eli had asked her to join him for dinner. It wasn’t uncommon except for the fact he’d asked her four days ago to save this specific night. Did he happen to know that it was the anniversary of her parents’ death? Surely he couldn’t know. Still, God did. Maybe God knew she’d need special care today.
Eli guided Sadie to a table in the back of the restaurant portion of the West Kootenai Kraft and Grocery. The eyes of the other Amish women bored into her. They were hardly discreet. Sadie sat and smoothed the skirt of her cape dress, wishing there was another place to spend time with Eli—to get to know him better—but their only choices were her aunt and uncle’s living room under the gaze of the kids, or here in the restaurant, the one public gathering place in the community. At least here everyone only stared and didn’t try to interrupt their conversation.
They sat facing each other, and instead of looking into his eyes, she traced the wood grain pattern on the log table with her finger.
“I came in for lunch, and Annie and Jenny were making up some strawberry pies. I wonder if anyone would mind if I ate dessert first.”
She laughed. “Or only ate dessert. Strawberry pie sounds good. They couldn’t have picked their own strawberries, could they?”
“Maybe if they started them in a greenhouse . . .”
“Ja, I suppose that’s possible.” Sadie smiled. “You should see my tomato plants. They’re taller than they would be in Indiana, I suppose.”
“So you’re adjusting to life here then?”
The question didn’t surprise Sadie. She’d seen the tender look in his eyes lately. She’d seen his concern.
“I am. It’s taken some getting used to . . .” Her voice trailed off, and she glanced up, staring into his eyes. “Sometimes I think it’s all a dream, you know? I picture getting on the train and making my way back home. I picture Dat in the barn and Mem at the stove—in our old house, of course. Mem would always wave me in when I walked in the door, as if welcoming me, telling me to come closer, and urging me not to let in any flies.” She chuckled. “If there was one thing that drove Mem crazy, it was a fly in her house.”
Eli leaned back, inhaling slowly. He seemed fixed on her every word. “I can’t even imagine, Sadie. I have my parents and both grandparents on Dat and Mem’s sides. I’ve never lost anyone close. I can’t really imagine,” he repeated.
“It’s God’s will, I suppose.” She said the words without conviction.
“Ja, we can accept it, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t grieve. I’ve had a talkin’-to with God over far less things.”
She smiled unexpectedly at his words, and she tried to imagine that. Eli seemed so levelheaded.
“Oh, you did, did ya? And did you write about that, too, in The Budget?” Sadie cleared her throat, and then she attempted to talk in a deeper voice. “I got mighty angry at God today. I picked up a few smooth stones and chucked them at majestic, tall pine trees as I spouted angry words.”
Eli’s smile faded at her words. “Does it bother you, Sadie, that I share my life with the world? I know it bothers your sister.”
“I’ve been thinking about that.” She paused for a minute and then shook her head. “Ne. I mean, I don’t think so. I hope it doesn’t hurt your feelings, but I’ve never been one to read The Budget. That was something that Dat—” Her words caught in her throat. “That was something that Dat did.”
He reached across the table, as if to pat her hand, but she pulled it away. She needed to know if Eli was serious, truly serious, before she allowed any display of public affection.
Eli nodded and pulled his hand back. “I’m sorry.”
She wasn’t sure if he was sorry about how memories of her parents stirred up emotion yet again, or that he’d tried to hold her hand in public. Sadie just shrugged and then picked up the menu as if it was the most fascinating reading material she’d ever come upon.
“I’m not sure what you think about the time we’ve been spending together, Sadie. I’d like to hope that you consider me a close friend, maybe more. But I did want to mention again that my grandfather is coming to the area. Opa has always wanted to see Montana, and my being here is a gut excuse.”
“That’s wonderful.” She clasped her hands on her lap and smiled, truly excited for him.
“Ja, I’m eager to see him. Many folks tell me we’re like two peas in a pod. But I just wanted to warn you before he arrived.”
“Warn me?”
“Vell, I’ve told him about you, Sadie. He likes to garden and . . .”
She could tell from the way his eyes darted to his water glass, then back to her, that wasn’t all he wanted to say.
“And . . .”
“And what?”
“And I told him that my feelings for you were starting to grow.”
She blinked her eyes several times before she answered. “It’s gut to know that,” she said softly. “For a while I wondered if—”
“Ready to order?” the waitress interrupted.
They both ordered slices of strawberry pie and coffee. Sadie couldn’t think of ordering anything more than that—not with the butterflies dancing around in her stomach. Then she saw it, the love in his eyes that Aunt Linda talked about. Suddenly fear pounded in her heart. Was she really ready for this conversation? Was she ready to open her heart?
Their pie and coffee arrived a few moments later, but instead of picking up his fork to take a bite, Eli turned his gaze to her again. “Now as I was saying—”
“You were saying that your grandfather is quite a gardener,” she hurried to say. “I’m so thankful that he was able to help me with my tomato plants. Have you told him how much they’ve grown?”
Eli scowled. He leaned forward and lowered his voice so only she could hear. “Sadie, you know that before we were interrupted, my mind wasn’t on tomato plants.”
She pressed her lips together into a thin line. Of course she knew that, but how could she tell him that the thing that scared her most was getting her hopes up? She couldn’t risk a broken heart.
“Will your grandfather be here long?” she asked, shaking off thoughts of what would really happen if she allowed herself to get caught up in dreaming of a life with Eli.
He sighed. “A week or so. Long enough to get to see a lot of the sights. Long enough to get to know you a little. More than anyone else, I respect my grandfather’s opinion.”
Opinion about what? she wanted to ask. About whether I’m worth risking your heart over? But she didn’t ask, and she could tell from his face that he was frustrated at trying to take the conversation to a deeper level, only to have her draw it back to gardening.
In her own mind, Sadie truly wondered if she was worth the risk. Was there even a large enough piece of her heart left to give to Eli?
Eli acted as if he had more to say, but instead he dug into his pie with gusto.
“I suppose all I wanted to tell you is that I hope you don’t mind if my grandpa asks you a few questions. He wants to know your heart, Sadie. He most likely wants to know if you’re right . . . for me.”
“Right for you?”
“As in marriage. Don’t you understand that’s what I’ve been trying to say?”
“Marriage?” The word played on her lips.
Eli leaned forward and took her hand, obviously not caring what anyone thought. “Yes, Sadie, and you don’t have to answer me now, but look into my eyes. Know my heart. I don’t want to go anywhere unless I have you by my side.”