Chapter 10
Days had passed since the announcement of the festivities, and preparations were in full swing for Saturday night. There was even talk of people from as far as Rahjah Blue Mountain attending. The village pathway was already brightly decorated with tiki lamps and candles placed in colored paper bags just waiting to be lit. The menu was planned. Even the Elders were excited.
Thursday after supper Pamela went riding down to the beach. She got off her horse and began walking to the rocky side of the beach where she’d never been before. She climbed the rocks, sat down, placed her elbows on her knees and her hands to her chin. She’d finished the book by Ian Fleming and the history books. She’d looked at the books in Saul’s library but knew she couldn’t borrow any without his permission; at least that’s what she told herself.
The sun had already hidden its face and darkness was descending, but she didn’t feel like going back to the village just yet. She leaned back on the rocks and closed her eyes.
She felt the presence of someone and hoped to Jah that Tim had not followed her. She thought it was probably Mary. She slowly opened her eyes, then suddenly sat upright. “Oh, Jah! Is it you? Is it really you?”
Saul held her hand and pulled her to him. “It’s really me, my princess.” He hugged her tight.
His shirt front was open, exposing his beautiful, almost hairless chest, and, as her arms went around his neck, her face brushed against his chest. She buried her face in his neck, inhaled his scent and hugged him. “You’re not supposed to come back until Saturday. But I’m so glad you’re back. I missed you.” She breathed a kiss on his neck.
He laughed and held her at bay to look in her face. “Really? Because I thought of no one else but you every day that I was away.” He gently held her face in his warm hands. “I would like to do this. I must, please.”
She closed her eyes. “Yes, please,” she breathed shakily.
He kissed her forehead, her eyes, her nose, and, finally, his mouth moved thoughtfully over her lips. Her lips were soft and warm and sweet and without his tongue penetrating her mouth he lingered, enjoying her sweet breath upon his face, the sweet taste of guava jam on her lips. He sucked a little at her lips and she shivered.
And as his tongue slowly entered her mouth, it felt like warm, sweet cherry sauce, slowly going through layers and layers of her skin, making her drunk as dormant desires awoke and raced through her veins screaming for more of him. Suddenly, being afraid that her body would betray her, she backed away.
Not knowing what he’d done, he whispered her name. “Pam.”
She turned and raised a shaky finger to stop him from talking. She liked the feelings going through her. Actually, she loved them. She wanted more. Before he could say another word, she ran back into his embrace and recaptured his warm mouth, drank some more from the velvet cup of delicious forbidden sensations that made her knees weak. Never before had she ever been kissed like that.
His lips moved hesitantly from her mouth to the pulsing hollow at the base of her throat and her head swam with need as she clutched him to her.
“Where did you learn to do that?” she whispered breathlessly.
He smiled and lifted her in the air. “I’ve wanted to kiss you from the very moment we met and sat together.”
“Why didn’t you?” She felt lightheaded. She sat and pulled him down beside her.
“Would you have slapped my face?” He looked into her face and smiled warmly.
“I don’t think so.”
He laughed.
“How did you know I’d be here?” Her voice was just above a whisper.
“I went to the village and asked Mary.”
She gasped. “Did anyone else hear you?”
“No one else saw me in the village. I wanted to surprise you. I haven’t even been home yet.”
“You came to see me first?” Her eyes opened with wonder.
“Yes.” He nodded. “I came to see the one person other than my children who brought me back home.”
She laughed. “Of course.” Then she took a breath. She still held his hand. “Then you don’t know that Raquel is in your village.” She felt him tense. Suddenly his face went grim as a cold expression settled there. She’d spoilt the moment. She waited for him to say something, but it took him more than a minute to speak. When he did, his tone was serious and his contempt for Raquel unmasked.
“Do you know when she got here?”
“The day after you left.”
He nodded, took a deep breath and looked at her. She smiled at him and the light in her eyes made him smile. “I told her that she could visit the children anytime she wished. She came to see the children. They don’t ask about her anymore, but I’m sure they’ve wondered about her.” And that was the end of that conversation. “Have you finished the books I gave you?” He placed a hand around her shoulders and pulled her closer to him.
“Yes, I have.”
In spite of the news he’d just received, just being with Pamela melted the anger he felt over Raquel being in his village. “Your thirst for knowledge is more than that of anyone I’ve ever known.” He kissed the top her head, leaned over and produced a wrapped gift.
She tore the paper to see the book he’d promised her and two poetry books. “I love them. Thank you so much. I don’t have anything for you.”
He laughed. “Yes, you do.”
She blushed and fidgeted.
“I want to go places with you and do things with you. I want to show you the world. Will you let me?”
He laughed and she knew it was from his heart. It sounded like the best music. “Yes.”
He hugged her.
“Where exactly did you go this time?” she asked.
“I went to Italy and America.”
“No Australia this time?”
“Not this time.” He couldn’t stop himself from laughing as he buried his face in her hair. “You smell so good.” He got up and pulled her to her feet. She swayed against him as if dancing to her own music.
“We have a big celebration, or should I say reunion party, planned for Saturday.” She let go of him, turned and took up her gift.
He stepped down off the rock and held out his arm. She smiled and went to him. He held her to his warm Suddenly his face went grim as a cold expression settled there.
“What?”
She was still in his arms, her arms around his neck with her feet dangling freely.
“Kissing you and holding you like this.”
“I thought of you constantly, but I don’t know why I missed the kissing part. If I’d known it would make me feel so happy and strange, I would have thought of it all the time.”
She was back on her feet but their eyes were still locked. “I read enough so I should know how to express the way I feel.” She was silent for a while as the wheels in her brain spun. She shook her head. “I can’t find the words.”
The strong hardness of his lips claimed hers and the delicious sensation spread through her entire body once again. Then his lips moved away like a whisper.
Her eyes were still closed and her face still turned up to him. “It’s getting harder to describe,” she breathed. “But do it again.”
He laughed and reclaimed her lips. His body hardened against her and lust ran through him like an open flame. He moved slightly away from her and she opened her eyes, held his hand and walked to her horse. He kissed her again and lifted her onto her horse. “This was the best night. Thanks again for this.” She held up the books. “And for coming back to me so soon.” Then she remembered the drink she’d made. “I have something for you. It’s in the river close to the village.” Seeing the gleam of interest in his eyes, she laughed.
“I can’t wait to see it or taste it.”
“Taste,” she said.
“Then it will be the best thing I’ve ever tasted in my life.”
“I think you should taste it before you say that.” He was making her nervous with his gaze fixed on her.
He bowed gracefully. She laughed and galloped away. He had walked all the way to see her, and now he resumed his walk with a smile on his lips, a gladness in his heart and a lilt in his step until he thought of what was waiting for him when he got home. Just when he’d begun seeing the sun again, Raquel had to appear like a black cloud.
Neither had seen Tim standing close to the beach watching. He was shocked to see her and Saul together like that. As a matter of fact, he’d never seen her with anyone before except her husband, and it made him angry. His face was marked with loathing for Saul and his expression turned vicious. He didn’t think Saul deserved a woman like Pamela. He’d thought himself too good for the Rahjah women so he’d married Raquel and brought disgrace to his people and himself. The more Tim thought of Saul, the more he felt hatred for him and the more he wanted to protect Pamela from him. Pamela was his. He took a deep breath and angrily stomped away before Pamela rode up the mountainside. He could no longer watch the interaction between her and Saul.
In bed, Pamela licked her lips. She closed her eyes and there he was. She felt his kiss on her lips and she breathed, “Oh, Jah.” Just the thought of him made her body come alive and her hand brushed her taut nipples. Surprised at the sensation going through her, she rolled on her side and took a deep breath to clear her head but, as she exhaled slowly, there he was again holding her, smiling at her, not letting up on the wonderful feeling going through her. “Oh, Jah,” she said again and closed her eyes.
With his suitcase in hand, Saul hesitantly climbed the steps to his cottage. It wasn’t that late, so he knew the children weren’t asleep and he needed to see them before he saw Raquel. He pushed the door open and the first thing that greeted him was his ex-wife staring at him. She smiled broadly, but didn’t move toward him from her perch on the cushion. “You’re back. I thought you’d be back on Saturday.”
“Hello, Raquel. How are you?” His voice was calm, controlled.
“I’m great. You’re not glad to see me? You said I could...”
“And I meant it. It’s good to see you. Are you enjoying your visit with the children?” Now his voice took on a more casual tone.
“Yes.” She was surprised at his casualness. She’d thought their meeting would be more touching, a little romantic even.
Saul placed his suitcase on the floor in the living room, smiled and tiptoed to the children’s room. He slowly pushed the door open and poked his head in. David was the first to see him. He jumped off the bed and rushed into his arms. “Dada, Dada, you’re home.”
Ruth followed. Both children were in their father’s arms talking over each other. Gracie and Shaela were still sitting on the bed. He beckoned to them. “My arms are long enough for everyone.”
The twins made space for Gracie and Shaela. Saul thought he was a strong man, but with all four children pulling at him purposely, he fell to the ground, laughing and listening to them scream in his ear. This was a perfect homecoming. “I have gifts for everyone,” he said.
“Even me?” Gracie said.
“Even you, Gracie, and you, too, Shaela.” He sat cross- legged on the floor, answered everyone’s questions and listened to them talk about the upcoming festivities. Gracie opened a bottle of guava jam and gave him a huge spoonful. He ate it and laughed. That was what he’d tasted on Pamela’s lips.
“We made it,” Gracie said. She pointed to everyone. “We all made it. We were saving this one for you alone.” She sat on one leg while the twins sat on the other. Shaela sat on the floor in front of him.
“Do you want to see your gifts now?” he asked.
They jumped off his legs and he went out to the living room. They didn’t follow. Raquel was sitting with a glass of wine in her hand. “I’m just going to get their gifts,” he said to her.
She nodded. “Then will you talk with me?”
He stopped and looked at her. “Of course.” He was still smiling. He reached into his suitcase and then walked back into the children’s room with a handful of gifts. He’d gotten books and chocolate candy for everyone. He’d brought enough sweets for all the children in the village, but now there was a flaw in his gift-giving. There was another village of children. He would go to work tomorrow making chocolate. He couldn’t cook as well as his father or the other men in the village, but he could make chocolate better than anyone.
After the children had settled down, he walked out into the living room to talk with Raquel. She patted the cushion beside her and he could tell she was intoxicated. Her drinking had been one of their biggest problems. Every time she went away, she’d bring back a lot of wine. Even though he occasionally took a glass of wine, he’d refused to drink with her. No other woman that he knew in the village drank, so she drank by herself.
He sat beside her.
“Pour me more wine, please.” She held out her glass.
He shook his head. “Don’t you think you’ve had enough?”
“I’ve had enough when I say I’ve had enough. Now pour.”
He looked at her, then touched her hand. “That’s fine, you can drink, but I won’t give you any more.”
“That’s the problem. You always force me to do what you want me to do.”
He could have sat there and listened to her drunken ranting, but he didn’t want to. He knew she’d soon fall asleep. He got up and carried his suitcase into his room. He opened the closet door to see all her clothes hanging in his closet and most of his clothes on the floor or pushed to the corner. He sighed and closed the door. He changed into jeans and a t-shirt and walked back into the living room. She was stretched out on two cushions. He threw a blanket over her and walked down to the river. He peeled off his clothes and jumped in. The cold water felt refreshing against his skin. He swam for a while, then went back home to see Raquel in his bed. He picked up a blanket and his night clothes and made himself comfortable on cushions in his library. There were four bedrooms, but he felt like sleeping in the library.
The children were so excited that their father was back from his trip that as soon as they awoke they ran to his room. They saw their mother lying alone in his bed. They backed out noiselessly and began to look for him all over the house. They found him asleep in the library. Gracie knelt and peered at him and when they heard him snore, they laughed.
Saul took a deep breath and opened his eyes. He pushed back his hair from his face and grinned when he saw the children.
“We’re going to get ready for breakfast. Are you up?” David said.
He sat up. “Of course I’m up. I dreamt of fried dumplings with ackee and codfish. Is it Friday?”
Ruth nodded.
“Then it’s ackee and dumpling day. Are you going to wake your mother?” He looked at his children, who seemed to shrink in size at the mention of Raquel, as did their friends.
“She’s mean when she drinks,” Ruth said.
He was surprised that she’d again drunk in front of the children, but he said nothing. He patted her cheek. “Okay, you go get ready for breakfast.”
The children left the library and he got up and pulled on his jeans and shirt. He walked to his bedroom. Raquel was still asleep. He had not noticed the empty glass on the floor last night. She’d had another glass of wine before she’d climbed into his bed. He pulled the door closed behind him, walked to the verandah and breathed in the sweet mountain air. Every time he came home, he appreciated it more. But, more than anything, he wanted to take Pamela for a trip around the world, one country at a time, starting with the one she feared most, Jamaica. He smiled and bit into his lower lip. Jah, he could still taste her. He closed his eyes for just a second and saw her face, her eyes gazing into his. He felt his muscles tighten in places they shouldn’t and he took a deep breath and opened his eyes. He had to be very careful how and where he thought of this goddess who could put him in a tailspin without even trying. That slow kiss would not leave his thoughts. Somehow, he really didn’t want it to.
The smell of frying dumplings drifted through the air. He pushed his hands into his pockets and walked to the kitchen, snuck up behind his mother and hugged her waist. She didn’t even turn but reached behind and patted his cheek. “Welcome home, son.”
“Can’t you even act surprised?” He picked up a dumpling and bit into it.
“I could, but then I’d be faking it. I saw you on the verandah last night.”
He leaned against the iron stove and looked up at the black chimney. The heat from the stove quickly seeped into his skin and he jumped away and leaned against the table.
His mother shook her head. “I’m sorry you had to come home to her.”
He laughed and pushed the entire little dumpling into his mouth. “It doesn’t matter.”
She took a good look at his smiling face. He was genuinely happy. “Is there something you want to tell me, son?”
He took a deep breath and reached for another dumpling. She slapped his hand. “It’s Pammy.”
“From the village?” She stopped chopping the callaloo and turned and leaned against the table.
He nodded. “She’s wonderful. She was right under my nose all the time and I didn’t know.”
“And now you do.”
“Yes.”
“She’s a very intelligent woman.”
“I know.”
“Does she know how you feel about her?”
“Judging from last night, I think she feels the same way about me.”
She motioned toward his cottage. “She came back to be with you again.”
“That book has been written, Mom. We all know the ending. It cannot be rewritten.”
Nanuk nodded. “You may have to shield Pam from Raquel. She can be violent, we all know that.”
“Don’t say anything to anyone, not even Dad.”
She smiled. “My lips are sealed.”
He kissed her damp cheek.
It was still cool outside. The sun’s rays were shining through the trees like an airplane bursting through dark clouds. He walked to his cottage while the food was being brought to the table. He didn’t have to go inside, the children came out.
At breakfast, his thoughts were only of Pam and their kisses. He’d never wanted to stop holding or kissing her. His fingers lingered on his lips and his eyes held a faraway look.
Nanuk watched him. “Are you eating or dreaming, son?”
He looked at her and laughed. “Both.”
Since it was the day before the festivities, everyone in the village was busy with the preparations. Saul wanted very much to see Pam but he knew she’d be busy, so he did his part by making chocolate for the children and stayed away from the cottage all day.
Pamela tried her best to stay away from the kitchen as much as possible, which wasn’t hard since all she did was daydream about Saul. She could still smell his scent in her hair, and every now and again she would catch a lock, slide it across her nostrils and inhale.
Saturday morning at breakfast, Mary leaned toward Pam and asked, “Did he find you Thursday night?”
“Yes. Thank you.”
“That’s it?”
She laughed and looked at her plate of fruit. “Do you want the details?”
“I guess not.”
Pamela nodded. “It’s been a long time since I’ve been this excited about anything.”
“Today’s festivities?”
“What else.” Pamela glanced at her friend and smiled.
“If I didn’t know you, I’d say you were trying to hide something.”
“You know me, do you?”