Chapter 14
After breakfast, it began drizzling, but not hard enough for any plans to be changed. James and Angel would be staying on the mountain for another week and Devin had to fly back home to upstate New York.
Pamela wore one of her old dresses for the trip to wherever Saul was taking her. Angel had wanted her to wear her new pair of jeans, but she wanted to wait. She wanted the new Pamela to be for Saul’s eyes only. Plus, she didn’t want anyone on the mountain to see her in any clothes but theirs.
Their trek down the mountain was a quiet one. Saul seemed to be in a world all his own, and Pamela didn’t interrupt his thoughts. At the bottom of the mountain, Saul packed their belongings in the trunk of the small BMW and smiled when he saw the new travel case that Pamela now carried. He ushered her quickly into the car when the drizzle turned into a steady downpour.
“I hope our vacation doesn’t get rained out,” she said as they drove onto the road.
“Never,” he said, changing gears and flashing her a reassuring smile. “We’re going to Devin’s beach house in Manchioneal. It’s fully stocked with everything we may need.”
“Have you ever been there before?”
“No, but I know the way.” Again he became pensive.
Pamela’s eyes took in everything along the way, women dressed in short dresses or skirts and sandals walking with baskets on their heads. Every car that passed, she’d ask, “What kind is that?”
He’d laugh and tell her.
“Does Jamaica make these cars?”
“Not to my knowledge.” He glanced at her, then back to the road ahead. He reached over and held her hand, laid her hand in his lap, changed gears, then held onto her hand, again caressing her fingers with his thumb.
She observed the homes. Some were unappealing to her and some made her eyes open wide because of their beauty. They were all different from the Rahjah cottages. He drove through streets with splendid sprawling homes and she whistled and laughed. Every time she’d point to a big house with well-dressed women or men, she’d say, “Jamaica is richer than I thought.”
They finally got to the beach house, and the reward of seeing Devin’s place was worth the trip from Rahjah Island.
“Wow!” she said, opening the car door before Saul could reach it. “I love it. It’s beautiful.” She ran ahead of him and bypassed the front door to run around through an arch made of roses to the back of the house onto the beach. The water was calm and inviting. There were no homes to be seen for at least a mile. “How did he ever find this place?” She opened her arms and twirled, falling right into Saul’s arms.
He held her and smiled. “I never asked him, but I do agree with you. It’s a very beautiful place. Should we take our things into the house and see if we like it?”
Her nervousness only lasted for a minute. “Oh, I do, I do.” She grabbed his hand and ran back to the car.
He wanted to tell her to slow down, but to tell the truth, he was enjoying every minute of her exuberance and laughing right along with her. When they went into the house, she bypassed the expensive furnishings and went to the lanai. Saul dropped the bags in the foyer of the three-bedroom house and went out to sit by her as she rocked in the lounge swing. The rain had stopped and now they watched as it slowly moved over the ocean towards them. They didn’t move.
Pamela felt so comfortable sitting there in Saul’s arms that even the rain coming into her face couldn’t disturb her. “You know, when I met Raquel...” She caught his furrowed brow. “I’m sorry, if you’d rather not speak of her...” She turned back to the rain and wind now making the palms and young coconut trees bend to the beat of their own drum.
“What did you think of her?” he asked.
There was a hint of something in his voice, but she couldn’t tell what without looking at him and she didn’t want to look at him. “I saw the way she dressed and jumped onto her horse and wanted to be like her. Well, not to be like her, but to dress like her.”
His smile was bleak and tight-lipped.
She changed the subject. “My daughter talks with animals.”
His smile was more of a ‘thank you for changing the subject’ smile. “Mine, too. And I know what you mean when you say with. She can hold a conversation with any animal.”
She pulled her feet onto the seat and faced him. “What do you think of that? Do you think our girls are lonely?”
“I don’t know. The village is filled with children her own age. Her brother is constantly with her. I really don’t know.”
She inhaled deeply and looked out at the raindrops massaging the ocean. “How can they be lonely?” She wrinkled her brows thoughtfully. “You know, I never seriously thought of it before. As you say, the village is filled with children the same age, yet they choose to talk with animals.” She looked at him. “Is Ruth more commanding or more conversational?”
“More commanding, I think.” He kept looking at her. “Why?”
“Gracie never really had a father, and Ruth’s mother went away.” She shifted in her seat and gestured with her hands. “I mean, ninety-nine percent of the children in the village have both parents; some parents don’t live together but they’re there anyway. Gracie’s father died tragically and I’m assuming Ruth saw her mother...well.” She looked away from him and down at her feet.
“She’s seen us quarrel, I’m afraid. She once saw her mother slap my face.” He didn’t look away from her.
She looked back into his eyes. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s all right. You know, I was never one to fight. I’d walk away before I lost my temper.” He laughed now as he remembered. “James and I used to have some real fights, though, and about the stupidest things.”
“Now you’re best friends.”
He nodded. “Yes, and I see what you’re getting at. I never dominate my children, and I’m assuming that you allow Gracie to make decisions all her own.”
“It’s the Rahjah way.”
“They don’t dominate the other children but they do the animals, and I may add, not in an angry way.”
“Yes. I know sometimes Gracie will say, ‘Keep quiet’ when the animals are making noise and they’ll stop immediately. Am I being foolish?”
He held her gesturing hands. “If you are, then so am I because I swear they respond to Ruth. But since she’s begun coming to you, she doesn’t talk with the animals as much.”
She threw up her hands, taking his with hers. “Same with Gracie.”
He laughed, pulled her to him and kissed her mouth hard.
“Are you trying to tell me to shut up?”
“Not at all. But I still can’t believe you won’t be running away from me for an entire week.”
She didn’t respond.
He pulled her to her feet, slipped his hand around her waist and walked inside. “Should we share a room or...” The word got lost somewhere in the air when he saw the look on her face.
“Let’s just let nature take its course. We won’t plan anything.”
He nodded and they walked back into the living room. She’d run right through and had not looked at the walls to appraise the paintings or seen the television set or radio standing in the corner of the room. He didn’t have to call her attention to them, as she went from one to the other nodding and mumbling. “Water’s paintings are all over the Rahjah community. I never met her, but I hear she was the nicest Elder you’d ever want to meet. She was 105 when she died?” She glanced at him.
“I think so. She loved Angel.”
“What did she love about her?”
“Angel has a knack for calling it as she sees it, so to speak. And by the way, the lady has a temper that even burned Aunt Clara.”
“Oh, Aunt Clara scares me. It’s as if she knows what you’re thinking. She speaks without hurry and is authoritative without being authoritative.”
He smiled. “Yes, that’s Aunt Clara.” He picked up the remote and turned on the television.
Pamela jumped at the sound. “What is that? How did you do that?” She walked up to the screen and touched it. There was a pause and she jumped away from it. “Did I do that?”
“No.” He switched the channels to something he thought she’d like. Animal Kingdom.
She sat and stared at the screen. “Oh, my Jah.” She patted the empty seat beside her. “Sit for a while.”
He’d known this would be her reaction. She was his blank slate, ready to absorb everything of interest. He also thought he knew her filter system. She took the remote from him and began switching channels until she got to the History Channel. She gave him back the remote and leaned back into his arms. “I can’t believe I’m seeing what I’ve read.”
“Wait until you actually see it for real.”
“Are you going to take me to these places: Italy and France and America?”
“If you’ll let me.”
“Oh, Jah, yes, yes.”
She pulled her feet off the floor and he threw his arms around her and could feel her heart beating a mile a minute. “You do get excited, don’t you?”
“I never have before, but all this, and with you, yes, I’m really excited. If I forget to thank you, thank you.”
He kept his hand close to her heart until it went back to normal. Then he took a breath. “Would you like to walk into town this evening? It’s a small town, but you’ll at least see some of the people you’ve been afraid of.”
“I’m not afraid of them, just a little wary of them.”
“That was careful sidestepping.”
“You liked that?”
He laughed and leaned his head against hers and closed his eyes. Would he be able to live up to her expectations, however simple? She was so easy to please.
When she’d had enough television, she got up and went to the bedroom and the adjoining bathroom. She looked at herself in the mirror and smiled as she saw her reflection looking back at her. She touched her hair, her face.
Slowly, she took off her clothes and took a shower, then wrapped the big soft towel around herself and walked back into the room. He’d carried her travel case in and set it on the bed. She searched through and took out a yellow silk dress. She dressed then walked to the standing mirror, took a good look at herself and ran her hands down the length of her dress.
She walked out to see him standing by the window. He turned and smiled as his eyes swept every inch of her. He took a deep breath and exhaled. “You are beautiful.”
“Thank you.” She touched the length of her dress. “I have legs.”
He laughed resoundingly. “And what beautiful legs they are.”
She blushed and tried to pull the dress past her knees.
“Don’t do that. It’s not too short.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
They drove into town, parked and walked the quiet streets. She held his hand and, smiling brightly, nodded to everyone she saw. To her amazement even the meanest looking person smiled back at her and nodded. People were going to or coming from work. She laughed. It wasn’t so bad after all. “I love second impressions,” she said in a low voice.
He smiled and gave her hand a little squeeze. Devin had told him about a little Ital restaurant and when he suggested it, Pamela thought for a while. She wasn’t quite ready to poison him with her cooking, so she agreed.
They walked into the restaurant and sat down at a table. They were waited on by a pleasant Rasta woman with beautiful dark skin, scarf-wrapped hair and a bright smile. She gave them a menu. Pam read the choices and made her selection.
After supper, they walked some more and drove back home.
Then she remembered something Raquel had told her. She turned to him and said, “I would like to see a movie.”
“A movie? Who told you about that?”
She smiled.
He thought Angel had told her. “I don’t know any theaters around here, but we can drive into Kingston.”
“Is that far?”
“A little.”
“Then we can come back here?”
“Well, if we leave now, we can catch a nine o’clock movie, I think. Since it’s so far, we can stay in Kingston for the night and go west tomorrow.”
“Okay, let’s go to Kingston.”
“And you call me impetuous.”
They packed and drove into Kingston. It took her breath away. The houses were bigger, perched on top of mountains. The streets were crowded with buildings and vehicles and lots of people. They checked into a hotel and although she said nothing, he could tell by the look in her eyes and the way she looked at everything and everyone that she was now taking it all in stride.
“Two rooms or one?” he asked her.
“We are together. Why would I want to be away from you in another room?” she asked, looking into his eyes.
He nodded. “Silly question, but I just wanted to be sure.”
“I’m sure.”
After checking in, they went directly to the Harbor-view drive-in. Tonight was oldies night. She watched Ben Hur in silence, taking in every word and action of the actors on the screen, jumping every now and again at the loud bangs and booms.
Tuesday, she wore her jeans and wiggled in them when he complimented her shape. He couldn’t believe she could eat so much and still have a flat stomach.
He took her shopping, and she bought very little for herself, just for her mother, daughter and the twins. “I took you shopping to buy things for yourself,” he said.
“I don’t need anything,” she replied.
He laughed and they went walking in Trafalgar. She ate ice cream made from almond milk, vegetable and ackee patties, more ice cream, and then pudding and fish and vegetables and fried plantains when they had supper. That night he held her hair while she threw up in the toilet. “I guess I ate too much. I should pace myself.”
He smiled and nodded. “I was just as bad my first time in Jamaica, but I’m used to all these things now and I’m bigger than you.”
She laughed and washed her face.
They lay side by side in bed that night talking and laughing until he asked what kind of man her husband was. She got serious, turned onto her back and smiled.
“He was wonderful. I don’t think he ever left the island except to go fishing. He loved fishing. He went fishing every day and always came back with something. He always laughed, even when I got upset with him.”
“I can’t imagine you getting upset with anyone,” Saul said, pulling her into his arms.
Her head lay on his arm and she laughed. “Oh, yes, I can. I got angry with Raquel.” She slapped her hands to her mouth. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to...”
He shook his head. “It’s okay. Was he a big guy?”
“Not big like you, but he was tall and lanky. Is that a good word?”
“I suppose so.” He inhaled the lavender in her hair and kissed the top of her head.
“We made all kinds of crafts together. He knitted an afghan for me all by himself. He made a spread for our bed out of finely cut scraps of cloth.” She turned in his arms and clasped her hands as if praying.
He faced her and pushed a stray lock from her face. “You loved him very much?”
“With all my heart. Gracie was our second child. The first one died before he was born.” She laughed nervously to keep from crying. “I know we aren’t supposed to speak of the dead, but sometimes there are exceptions. I never saw him. Mama took him away immediately. I became pregnant again three months later. Everything went so quickly when Gracie was born. He’d gone fishing. Gracie took only four hours to be born. She was determined to take as little time as possible.” She stared into his face until her eyes burned with unshed tears remembering the joy of childbirth and the horror of death. The tears rolled down her cheeks and she looked away.
“Don’t, don’t, darling,” he said, pulling her close and cuddling her.
“I guess this is one of the reasons we are not allowed to speak of the departed or utter their name. It’s too hard. But the memories are always there, you know. Deep down inside you suffer. It’s better to talk about it, to cry aloud and get it out. I cried when he left. I cried a lot. I felt lonely. I felt angry, then sad, even though I had little Gracie and the entire village.”
He held her close and she pushed her face into his neck as tears blinded her eyes. He rocked her back and forth, caressing her soft cheek and whispering into her ear, “It’s all right, I’m here.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I don’t know why I’m crying. I think I’m a little bit happy and a little bit sad.”
He looked into her eyes, clouded with unshed tears, and then kissed a salty tear as it slipped down her cheek. He placed a finger under her chin. “I didn’t want you to cry.”
His face was sad, his eyes at half-mast. She smiled. “I know.” Her hand reached up and caressed his cheek where the scar from Saturday night stood as a bright reminder. Then she ran her fingers over his hair.
He pressed his lips to her mouth and she closed her eyes and savored the sensation of want running through her.
He needed to wrap himself in her warm body. She looked into his smoldering eyes and he touched her face. He shifted his body away from her. The blood pulsing through his veins made him very aware of his own needs, but something was saying, “Not now. The time isn’t quite right.” He should not have asked about her husband. He squeezed his eyes shut briefly. She was staring at him.
“Are you all right?” she asked in a quiet voice.
He smiled, turned her around and cupped her body into his, creating a delicious warmth between them. His lips pressed against her neck and she took a deep breath and closed her eyes.
“I want you to relax and just enjoy us.”
She nodded.
She kept looking at him and loving him. She’d thought he’d make love to her last night even though she’d been sad, but what they’d shared was more than physical. She would not have hesitated to give herself freely to him, but he didn’t want her to be sad and still thinking of her dead husband. He’d listened to her and held her at the appropriate moment and now she thought he was the most understanding, thoughtful man she’d ever met. She didn’t realize he was awake and looking at her until she heard his soothing voice.
“What do you want for breakfast?” he asked.
“Are you cooking?”
He smiled. “We’re in a hotel in Kingston. There are no stoves in the room.” His fingertip played with her chin.
She kept staring at his face, his mouth, his eyes. I want you for breakfast. She tilted her chin in thought. “I don’t know what I want.”
Knowing she probably wouldn’t like the hotel food, he kissed her forehead. “Come on, get ready. I’m gonna take you to a nice little restaurant not far from here.”
She didn’t move. She kept staring at his half-naked body as he moved out of the bed.
He went into the bathroom and ran a bath. Then he came back, pulled her into his arms and carried her to the bathroom. He would have taken off her clothes, but that would have been asking too much of him. He didn’t want to rush their lovemaking. He wanted to spend hours exploring this very fine body.
She grinned at him when he shook his head and left the room. She’d read his mind. You’re mine.
After a leisurely bath, she got dressed and met him in the room. He wore a pale yellow cotton shirt tucked into blue jeans and she wore a red sundress and sandals.
“You look so relaxed,” he said, taking her arm and pulling her to him. “And you smell delicious.”
“And that’s a good thing, right?”
“That’s a very good thing.” His hands slipped the length of hers. Then he brought her hands up to his shoulders and left them there. He kissed her deeply.
She swayed against him. He smiled and shook his head. “Let’s go. Is there anything special you want to do today?”
“Eat until I get sick again.” She laughed.
So did he. He was enjoying every moment of getting to know her. He was pretty sure he was head over heels in love with her. He slipped his arms around her shoulders and they walked to the elevator together.
Stepping out into the bright sunlight, Pamela breathed in the cheap gasoline fumes and coughed. At least the weather was the same as on her island. She shaded her eyes. He turned, guided her back inside the hotel and told her to wait for him. “I’ll be back in a little while.”
She nodded, sat down and began looking at everyone walking through the lobby. Some ignored her completely, some smiled. She was becoming very self-conscious. Where’s a book when I need one? She could have been ignoring all the people who were either ignoring her or looking at her.
Saul was back with a pair of sunglasses for her. She stared at him, then at the glasses. He slipped them on her face and she kissed him. “Thank you. Now no one will know if I’m staring at them or not.”
He laughed and guided her back outside. “I bought them for you yesterday while you were shopping. You’d tried them on so I thought you’d like to have them.”
She hugged his waist. “Thank you.”
After breakfast he took her to Port Royal. He knew she’d love this particular historical site. Then he took her to the airport, where they sat in the car for a while just watching the planes take off.
“You’re so good to me,” she said, leaning her head against his shoulder as they listened to oldies music on the radio.
“I’m having as much fun as you are. I can’t think of any place I’d rather be than right here with you.”
“Me, too.”
It wasn’t until they’d had supper that he decided to take her to see a musical at The Little Theater. Although she loved the movies, he thought she’d love this side of the arts even more. After all, they put on plays all the time in the villages, but they were almost always historical. This was different.
Dressed in a royal blue sleeveless dress that she’d picked out for herself when Saul had taken her shopping, Pamela looked like a completely different woman. “If Gracie and Mary could see me now,” she said, looking at herself in the full-length mirror in the bathroom.
“They would agree with me when I say, princess, you’re a knockout.” He pulled her to him and pressed his lips to hers.
She took a deep breath after he’d released her lips. “And that’s a good thing, right?”
“Oh, baby,” he groaned.
They both laughed and headed out the door.
He was right, she enjoyed the play immensely, not only because of her artistic nature but because this was her first non-historical musical. It was light and comical and she laughed loud and heartily, unaware of how enthralling she was to him when she laughed. Her happiness was his delight.
“What do you want to do now?” he asked after they left the theater.
She looked into his face and laughed. “You’ll do anything I want to do?”
He nodded. “Yes.”
“Are you sure?”
He nodded.
“Let’s go back to the hotel and make love.”
He laughed at her boldness but couldn’t hide the pleasure he felt at her request. “I’ll do anything you ask.”
She pulled him to the car and opened his door for him. “Get in.”
She slammed his door and ran around to her side. He leaned over and opened the door for her. All the way back to the hotel, he never stopped laughing.
She pulled him through the lobby, not caring who stared.
Off the elevator, she pulled him to the room and unlocked the door, but when she got inside, she just stood with her back braced against the door.
“Are you all right?” he asked, sensing something had changed in just a few minutes.
She looked into his eyes. He wrapped her in his arms. “Are you afraid?”
She nodded. “But not for what you think.”
“What?”
“What if you don’t like the way I make love?”
He lifted her off her feet and took her to the bedroom. “You know, I wondered why you never remarried for all those years,” he said as he gently placed her on the bed.
“I guess I was waiting for you.”
“And I for you, it seems.” His fingertips touched her cheek. Then he switched on the light.
She stood and turned for him to unzip her. When he did and her dress fell to the floor, she turned in his arms and began unbuttoning his shirt. He allowed it to fall to the floor.
He pressed her to the bed, lay beside her and thoughtfully claimed her lips. His fingertip gently caressed her chin, drawing a line to her cheek. Her body responded to his touch as her breasts pressed against his chest through the thinness of her bra, tingling and trembling as she closed the gap between them and pressed hard into him.
His hand fished for the bra closure and it easily came loose. He let it slip to the bed as she fumbled with his pants. Grudgingly, he stood and quickly got rid of his pants, then stripped her of the rest of her clothes.
His moist warm mouth hungrily reclaimed hers, demanding and giving. She tingled in places she’d forgotten existed and groans escaped from deep within. Her hands fumbled for the light switch without moving her mouth from his. She turned out the light.
“I want to see you,” he said.
“Not yet.” She pulled him down on her. There was no waiting. Their bodies were starved for each other and his hands roamed over her breasts.
His kiss was hard and bruising and she wanted his entire body inside her to put out the blazing fire that raged within. His lips moved from her mouth to the base of her throat. His body moved on top of her, imprisoning hers in a web of growing arousal.
He felt her body tremble as he locked himself fully into the soft folds of her inner thighs. He could tell by her whimper that he’d touched her pleasure spot. She pressed closer and they were as one, moving in sync.
Hot tides of passion raced through her and she wantonly pushed him to a sitting position. She felt him deep inside her as she lost herself in the pleasure of his kiss. Her thighs tightened around his waist as passion pounded the blood through her heart, chest and head.
Feeling the intensity of her hunger, he released her lips and watched the emotions play out on her face, felt her impatience as her body jerked and clung to the hardness of him, pulling, draining.
She gasped in sweet agony as her body lit up and shattered into a million glowing stars. The strong hardness of his thighs pressed hungrily against hers as he gave her all the fiery release she needed, they needed.
Still clinging to him, he allowed her to pull him back against the damp sheets. He rolled off her and gathered her to him. Her gentle understanding ways had certainly belied her fiery passion. He turned on the light and she grabbed the sheets and covered her body.
“You are the most beautiful woman I have ever known. You have the body of a goddess,” he said, gently lowering the sheet from her body. “Please don’t deny me the pleasure of seeing the body that just brought tears to my eyes.”
She slowly let go of the sheet and his hand wandered over her body, taking in all her curves. She closed her eyes to his touch and bit her lips.
“I love you. I love every single thing about you. Every curve of this wonderful body.” He inhaled deeply and shook his head.
“Everything?” she said in a small voice as she opened her eyes to look at him.
“Everything.”
She ran her hands over his muscular body, the scars on his neck and cheek. She gently kissed each scar and whispered, “I love you.”
She watched him grin, showing his uneven white teeth. “You’re beautiful on the inside, and handsome and...”
He blushed.
“It’s true.” She turned and fitted her body into his. He ran his finger down the small of her back and she trembled and moaned. Quickly aroused, she claimed his mouth savagely, sending currents of desire running through him. He groaned and was ready for her. She slipped on top of him and massaged his body with hers. Her breast to his made him tingle and he pulled her up and took a ready nipple into his mouth. She gasped and moved against him as he willingly gave his entire body and soul to her. She took him inside her and made love to him in a way that his body would never forget. Wave after wave of pleasure radiated and pulsed through him. Every nerve ending in his groin became sensitive as his breathing became erratic. If this is how I should die, Jah, I’m willing, he thought.
His senses reeled as if short-circuited when she moved her body, expertly bringing him to a fiery pitch. He allowed her breast to slip slowly from between his teeth and hungrily claimed her mouth. She felt him and waited and squeezed as once again they exploded together. He held her there, on top of him. She rested her head against his damp chest, feeling the rapid beat of his heart until it slowly went back to normal. “If I didn’t know then, I know now,” he said.
Her eyes opened, then slowly closed.
She fell asleep on top of the man she loved.