Bear
Faith gripped my hand so tight I thought she might break my fingers. She’d been in labor for over an hour, and our son still hadn’t made an appearance. I could see she was tiring quickly.
“Another push,” the doctor said. “The head is nearly out.”
She panted and did as he said, pushing with all her might. She tightened her hold on my hand, and I muttered a curse. It would be a miracle if I didn’t lose the use of my fingers after this. How the hell had the woman gotten so strong?
“Woman, you’re goin’ to break my hand.”
“Be thankful that’s all she’s breaking,” said one of the nurses. “Delivery earlier today the wife grabbed her husband’s crotch. Poor man ended up with a testicular torsion. Now he’s down in the ER.”
I felt the blood drain from my face, and I swayed on my feet.
“Seriously? That makes you want to pass out? I’m trying to push a giant baby out of a very small opening. Without drugs!” She screamed the last part and I wished I could take her pain away.
“I’m sorry I didn’t get you here fast enough.” I patted her hand, wanting to keep her calm.
“Bear… shut up. If you value your life, don’t say another word.” Her jaw tightened and she pushed again.
“The head is out!”
I looked at our child, and immediately looked away. There were some things a man didn’t need to see. His wife’s pussy stretched around a baby’s head being one of them. I couldn’t imagine the pain she felt right now. Good thing she wouldn’t be having more kids. I didn’t think I’d be able to survive another delivery.
“Another push, Faith.” The nurse patted her hand. “One good push and you’ll be able to greet your son.”
She pushed, not stopping until our son came all the way out. Panting for breath, she leaned back against the pillows. I saw her eyes start to droop. She blinked a few times, like she was fighting to stay awake, then her eyes shut, and her hand went limp. An alarm sounded, and both the doctor and nurse froze.
“What’s goin’ on?” I asked.
“She’s passed out.” The nurse and the doctor shared a look. “I’m afraid I need you to go to the waiting room, sir. We’ll send for you soon.”
“What? Why? I’m not leavin’ my wife and kid!”
“Bear, your wife is bleeding too much. She could go into shock. We need to treat her, which means we need some room.”
It felt like my knees would give out, but I managed to stagger from the room. I found the waiting area and collapsed into a seat. A few of my brothers had come to the hospital. Piper and Cordelia were also here. They all rushed toward me, but Fox held them back.
“Give him a minute. Corvin, take the girls to the cafeteria. I bet Bear could use some coffee.”
“We’ll be back, Daddy,” Cordelia said. I looked up and saw the worry in Piper’s eyes and hoped she didn’t say anything to her sister.
“What happened?” Fox asked.
“They said she’s bleeding too much and told me to leave. I didn’t even get to see our son. I have no idea if she’s going to be okay, or if Jasper is all right.” I put my hands over my face and prayed for the first time in decades.
Please let Faith and Jasper be okay. Please don’t take them from me.
It felt like hours passed before a nurse came out to speak with me. She seemed haggard, but she gave me a cautious smile.
“Would you like to visit your son?” she asked.
“Only him?” I asked.
She nodded. “Your wife is being prepped for surgery.”
“I don’t understand. What’s going on?” Fox placed his hand on my shoulder, and Piper came to lean against my side. From the corner of my eye, I saw Luciana put her arm around Cordelia.
“Your wife hemorrhaged after delivery. We tried medication first, but…”
“But what? She’s okay, isn’t she?” I asked.
“Sir, your wife coded.” My knees gave out and I hit the floor. Everything in me went numb at her words. “We were able to get her back, but the doctor suggested a hysterectomy. That’s why I said they’re prepping her for surgery now.”
“She’s still alive?” I asked, my voice coming as more of a croak.
“She is. If the surgery is successful, she has a good chance. Recovery will take a while. She’s going to need all of you.”
“Can our daughters come to see their brother?” I asked.
“They asked me to keep it to one person at a time, and no one under sixteen, but all things considered I’ll make an exception. Follow me.”
I stood and took my daughters’ hands. We peered through the nursery window and found the little bassinet that said Dupont. My son had a head of dark hair and looked much larger than the other babies in the room. I read the little card. 9 pounds 3 ounces, 22 inches.
“There’s your brother,” I said. “Jasper Charles Dupont. He’s a handsome boy, isn’t he?”
“Mom’s going to be okay, isn’t she?” Piper asked.
“She’s tough. She’ll come through this.” I had to believe those words. If I had to raise these kids on my own, I would. But the thought of spending a single day without Faith ripped out my heart.
“Why don’t we get something to eat?” Cordy asked. “By the time we’re done, maybe they’ll have more news on Mama.”
“Good idea. You two lead me to the cafeteria.”
It took a few hours before someone came to tell us Faith would be all right. By the time I saw her again, it felt like I’d aged another ten years.
I held her hand and kissed her fingers. “I love you, Faith. Don’t you ever try to leave me again. I can’t live without you.”
Three Weeks Later
I’d propped myself in bed and Faith leaned back against me. She held Jasper in her arms, and I kept my arm around her waist. She still tired easily, and I worried she’d go to sleep and drop him. Once he’d finished feeding, she buttoned the top of her nightgown and I called out for Piper.
“Is Jasper ready for a nap?” she asked.
“Can you put him in his crib? I think your mom is the one needing a nap.”
“Sure.” Piper came over and picked up Jasper, then leaned down to kiss her mom’s cheek. “Don’t worry, Mom. We’ll keep him safe while you get your energy back.”
Piper shut the door behind her. Faith sighed and laced her fingers with mine.
“I’m not dying, Charlie.”
“You did die. Your heart fucking stopped! If you don’t want me to baby you, and worry, then don’t do something stupid like stop breathing.”
She smiled a little. “I didn’t do it on purpose.”
“I know. Scared the shit out of me.”
“What am I missing? I feel like all I do is care for Jasper and sleep.”
“You go back to the doctor next week. They want to make sure you’re doing okay and draw some blood to run a few tests. As for the rest of us, I’ve taken some time off until you’re back on your feet. The club won’t come to me unless it’s an emergency. The girls started school, and so did Corvin. They seem to like it.”
“I didn’t get to take them back-to-school shopping.” She sighed again, and I knew she’d be asleep soon.
“I gave Piper money. She took Cordelia to the mall. Think Corvin went with them and took Marianna. The kids are fine, sweetheart. You focus on getting better. None of us can survive without you. Especially me.”
“I love you, Charlie.”
“Love you too.” I heard her even breathing and knew she’d gone to sleep. I held her close and placed my hand over her heart. As long as it kept beating, so would mine, because she was everything to me. “I know you think I saved you, but you’re wrong, Faith. You and our kids gave me a reason to keep living, so I need you to stay by my side until I draw my last breath. No more dying. I can’t handle it.”
I heard Jasper fuss and knew the girls would take care of him. I had the most wonderful children. They’d both matured a lot since Faith gave birth and nearly left us. I no longer worried about Piper getting in trouble with the boys at school. If Corvin didn’t keep them away from her, she did it herself. Not once had she brought up dating. When I’d asked her about it, she’d informed me there were more important things -- like her family.
I wouldn’t let her waste her childhood worrying about the rest of us, but for now, I needed the extra help. Once Faith was back to her usual self, we’d sit Piper down and talk to her about hanging out with kids her age, other than Corvin.
While Faith slept, I hummed to her. Just the Way You Are was my go-to when it came to the woman in my arms. I never knew if she heard me, but I hoped she did. I didn’t want a day to go by that she didn’t know how much I adored her.
“You’re my wife, the mother of my children, and my everything, Faith. You’re the reason my heart beats.” I kissed the top of her head and heard a muffled, I love you, Charlie. I smiled and hummed another song for her, and thanked God for answering my prayer. He’d let me keep Faith and Jasper. If my wife had died that day, I’d have followed her to the other side, if for no other reason than to bring her back with me.
Heaven couldn’t have this angel because she was all mine.