Ross woke to the sound of thunder and the softer sound of scratching at the side of the bed.
It took him a minute to recognize it.
Hobo was frantically trying to get up on the bed.
Lightning flashed into the room and he understood Hobo’s terror. How many times had the dog tried to find shelter?
Ross hated storms, as well.
Too often it brought back the scene from the farm. The thunder that woke him up, the neighing of alarmed horses that sensed something was terribly wrong...
He never knew why his father chose that method of death, why he’d left his only child or his wife to find him. I’ve never forgiven you for that.
Ross looked at the clock. It was a little after 3:00 a.m. He lifted Hobo up on the bed. The dog was trembling with fear.
He remembered the dog he had as a boy. Patches loved having his stomach rubbed. Ross turned Hobo around and started rubbing the dog’s stomach. A kind of purring from deep in Hobo’s throat touched him as few other things had in recent years. The dog had been so helpless, thrown away for reasons he couldn’t understand.
Like Ross had been.
He knew the reasons years later, but it never erased the memories of a kid who’d lost all he loved in a matter of days. His family. His home. His horse. His dog.
And now he was relating to this dog in a way that meant trouble. He knew he wouldn’t go back to sleep now. The freshly revived images would stay with him for days.
“Hey,” he said to Hobo when the thunder faded away. “Need to go outside?”
He didn’t wait for an answer. He rolled out of bed and reached for the running shorts he’d left in a chair near his bed. He pulled on his T-shirt, then his shoes.
He plucked Hobo, along with the new leash, and went outside. The storm had apparently rolled on. Water still dripped from trees and from the roof. Hobo looked up at him as if wondering, What now?
“Damn if I know,” he said. He only knew that he was restless. He wouldn’t sleep now. His mind was too jumbled from the nightmare. Don’t think about the past. Think about now.
He reviewed yesterday. On the whole, it had been successful. Any concerns he had about the program had been alleviated. It was well researched and apparently well executed.
He should have known. Josh wouldn’t have been connected with anything haphazard. From the notes he’d read, the vets—guests—were well chosen. The volunteers were knowledgeable and conscientious. Everyone connected to the program appeared to be competent and receptive to suggestions.
His only concern was Susan. He couldn’t remember when he’d ever felt so connected to a woman in so short a time.
He liked her sense of humor, her commitment to the project and the guests, her general competence. Most of all he liked her open smile that included everyone she encountered. He hadn’t missed the protective affection that both Josh and Jubal displayed toward her. She must have flaws but he hadn’t noticed any yet except, maybe, her clear determination that he keep Hobo. Maybe her heart was too big.
He’d missed seeing her last night. Had she purposely avoided him or was there some emergency? And why did he care? Dammit, he did.
He took Hobo back inside. It was ten after four, but he knew he wouldn’t sleep again.
He picked up the paperback—a mystery—he’d found at a truck stop several days ago and tried to read.
Susan woke up earlier than usual with a cat walking over her. She opened her eyes to the unblinking gaze of Vagabond staring at her. The cat obviously felt neglected and didn’t waste time in telling Susan about it.
Susan had not reached her house until seven last night. She knew Ross was holding several sessions with the vets and would be occupied until late. There had been no reason to wait and drive him home despite her urge to do exactly that.
Hanging around was ridiculous and would indicate an interest she didn’t have. She had no doubt he could take care of himself in any situation and he certainly had friends. She understood he’d never met Jubal before he arrived and yet they talked as if they’d known each other forever.
Maybe it was just the warrior breed.
Whatever it was, she needed to stay away. She’d never been drawn to anyone like this before.
Not even Richard, her former husband. He had been as far from her small town life as he could be. Maybe that had been the attraction. Unlike Ross in his jeans and T-shirt and bike, Richard looked as if he’d stepped off a sophisticated magazine cover. He always dressed well, was always well groomed and hated it when she wasn’t the same...
On her way home, she’d stopped at the inn. Mark was at the desk. All was well. Good, in fact, with four new drop-in guests and reservations for future dates.”
“How is the vet program doing?” Mark asked.
“Even better than the last one.” Susan added, “You’re going a great job. I hope you know how much we appreciate you for filling in for me and all the extra hours.”
He went red. “I’m grateful for the extra money and it’s usually so quiet, I can study.”
“Can you make sure we have coffee and pastries by five thirty? I expect we will have at least one large and hungry guest at that time.”
“I know who you mean. Will do.”
She headed home, only to hear complaints from Vagabond when she arrived.
“Sorry, girl,” she said. “Promise to do better tomorrow.”
She fed Vagabond, cleaned her litter box and took a long hot bath. She had planned to read in the tub, but her mind was too busy. Instead she just luxuriated in the warm water. She’d helped out at New Beginnings because they needed it during the first few days. By tomorrow, most of the guests would know how to saddle, mount, dismount, cool off the horses and take care of the equipment. She wouldn’t be needed.
She would spend tomorrow at the inn, doing what she was paid to do. Update the ad in the state tourism magazine. Send thank-you notes to recent guests and offer a discount for a repeat visit or to someone they recommended. She also intended to write a feature about the Jeep trip—which was apparently a real selling point—and peddle it to local papers in the area and travel magazines.
She’d been delinquent in those areas. She’d been sidetracked by one Ross Taylor, who’d made it clear he was a loner and never stayed in one place longer than a few weeks. Despite the attraction that flared between them, their lives were incompatible and it was foolish to let it go any further.
Goal for the next few days: avoid him.
Ross woke at five, debated about his transportation to the ranch. He could run, but Jubal said he could ride the bike and that would be a lot more convenient.
He had to wear jeans with the bike. He put the running shorts in his saddle bags along with his running shoes. He dropped by the lobby with hopes for fresh coffee and found it ready along with a plateful of pastries sitting on the counter.
He took a bite. They were good. Better than good. More like terrific. Warning himself he may not get into either jeans or shorts by the end of two weeks, he ate three large pastries. He fed Hobo and took him outside to do his business before tucking him into the basket on his bike. No protest. Hobo was obviously adaptable.
When he arrived, the vets were all outside, milling about in an assortment of clothing: jeans, cutoff jeans and shorts. Some of them were stretching. Some had coffee in their hands. Others were obviously trying to work out the soreness from yesterday’s rides.
Neither Susan nor her car was visible. He didn’t like the sudden jab of disappointment he felt. He’d looked forward to the spontaneous wide smile and some quip.
But it was 6:00 a.m. and his vets had a long day ahead of them. He quickly changed to running shorts and shoes and met them outside. Danny appeared and offered to take care of Hobo.
Then they were off. Jubal appeared from the barn, caught up with him and met his pace stride by stride. “Don’t know why I didn’t think of this,” he said. “Great way to build unity as well as improve muscle strength.” He looked around. “Susan not here today?”
“Doesn’t look like it,” Ross said. “She didn’t mention it yesterday.”
“Probably trying to catch up at the inn,” Jubal said. “She’s determined to make it successful.”
“How did she get involved in it?” Ross asked.
“Her background is in the hospitality field. She was in management for several hotels before coming back here.”
“Why did she come back?”
Jubal shrugged. “You’ll have to ask her. Josh is the only one who might know, and he’s the Sphinx as far as other people’s business goes.” He looked around. They weren’t within listening distance of any of the others, who were huffing behind them. “Interested?” he asked.
“Not the way you mean,” he said even as he knew it wasn’t exactly truthful. But then Jubal would know that. The very fact he’d asked about her was a giveaway. “I shouldn’t be,” he corrected. “But she lights up wherever she goes.”
“She does that,” Jubal said. “Be cautious, my friend. Covenant Falls can be dangerous to bachelorhood.”
“You seem to be content with it,” Ross said.
“I am. I have a life with Lisa and the kids I never thought was possible for me. I was pretty much a broken-down wreck when I arrived here. Those years as a prisoner broke me physically and mentally. Then I met Lisa and her brother and sister, and they chased away the shadows. Jacko clinched it. They certainly changed my life.” He paused, then added, “That doesn’t mean it works that way for everyone. I don’t want to see Susan get hurt again.”
It was obviously a warning. Ross nodded. “I don’t, either,” he said.
Then he had to ask, “What happened before?”
“I don’t know all of it. Just that it was bad enough that she’s avoiding any meaningful relationships now.”
Another not so subtle warning.
But Jubal was right.
There was no place to go for Susan and himself.
He just nodded, and Jubal dropped to the back of the pack.
Kate and another vet took Jubal’s place alongside him. “Ready to pick up the pace?” he asked her.
“Sure,” Kate said. Her companion nodded, and Ross sensed a challenge going on between them. A budding romance?
“Go for it,” he said, and dropped back as the jog turned into a race. He and Jubal stayed to the back, making sure no one was left behind or having a problem.
Jubal glanced at him. “We have a good race between those two,” he said.
“Yeah, I think we do. Any guess as to the winner?”
“Kate,” they said in unison.
They were right.
When they arrived back at the bunkhouse, Jubal took Ross aside. “Want a private tour of the property? Has to be on horseback.”
“I saw some of it with you before,” Ross said, puzzled.
“There’s much more,” Jubal said. “It will take a little more than an hour.”
Ross hesitated. The stable was still a reservoir of bad memories. Dammit, he had to get over it someday. Still, he fought it. “I’m not that sure of my riding.”
“I watched you,” Jubal replied. “You have a good seat. You looked comfortable enough.”
“What about Hobo?”
“Danny will look after him.”
Ross had no more excuses. He simply nodded. His hands started to sweat as they walked in. Shadows seemed to fall over the interior. He stiffened, fought off the inclination to turn around and leave.
He stopped suddenly as they walked under a beam. Steady. No creak. No shadows from a lone battery-operated lantern.
“Ross?”
Had Jubal guessed the turmoil inside?
“Sorry,” he said. “Just paused to look at the black horse. He’s a handsome guy.”
“He is that,” Jubal said. “Gentle, as well. He belongs to Luke. Damien is one of his best teaching horses.”
Ross nodded. He walked to Cajun’s stall and stopped while Jubal went to Jacko’s stall. Cajun nuzzled him, looking for a carrot. Memories began to fade. “Sorry,” Ross said. “I was distracted. I’ll give you a carrot on the way out.” There was still a stiffness in his voice as it suddenly occurred to him that he’d been talking to animals a lot lately.
After saddling their horses, Jubal and Ross led them outside before mounting. Riley stood near a tree and looked as if he was waiting for someone. He approached Ross.
“I came to see my horse,” Riley said but he just stood there as Jubal mounted Jacko and moved out of hearing distance.
“Riley,” Ross said. “Can I help you with anything?”
“Can I talk to you later?” Riley asked.
“Sure,” Ross said. He glanced at his watch. “I’ll be back no later than 9:00 a.m. What’s good for you?”
“Nine is good,” Riley replied. “Thanks.”
“Where do you want to meet?”
“Outside the bunkhouse?”
Ross didn’t have any appointments until after lunch. He’d planned on mostly watching this morning. “Sounds good to me.”
Riley nodded.
Jubal led the way as the two of them followed the path taken on Ross’s first ride, then continued along the stream to a smaller paddock where several mares grazed with their youngsters. Straight ahead was a small lake at the foot of the mountain.
A neat log cabin surrounded by tall aspens sat on the far side of the lake. “There’s ten acres here,” Jubal said. “The former owners of my ranch built it as a guesthouse for their grown children and their families.” He led the way to the cabin and the two of them dismounted. They tied the horses to one of the trees and Ross followed Jubal to the cabin.
The door opened to a large living area. The interior was rustic with log walls, a rock fireplace on one side and a picture window facing the lake. It was furnished with a long sofa and several lounge chairs. To the right was a kitchen with a stove, fridge, lots of cupboards and room for a large table. A hallway led to two nice-sized bedrooms and a bathroom.
“And you are showing this to me because...?” Ross didn’t really have to ask. He knew.
“Because it might make a good base for you.”
Ross stared at Jubal. “You barely know me.”
“I’m a quick judge of character,” Jubal replied. “And Josh really likes you. You fit in well here. It was obvious yesterday.”
“I don’t care about having a base,” Ross said as he looked around. If he did, though, it was perfect for one person. Or two.
Where in the hell did that thought come from?
“You don’t need to answer,” Jubal said, ignoring Ross’s statement. “Just let it simmer. We have a terrific vet community here. You could continue to travel to jobs as much as you want but you would have a home base. Help us out whenever you’re here.”
Ross hesitated. There was a certain logic to it. Jubal had probably wanted to meet him before offering the cabin—rather than the inn—for his stay in Covenant Falls. He looked around. Horses grazed beyond the lake and now the morning sun spread a streak of gold across the water. Peaceful. Although it was only a few minutes by horse from Jubal’s stables, it could have been miles away.
“Is it for sale?” Damn if he knew why he was asking the question.
“Could be. Could be leased. Could just be here whenever you worked with our program. You can even raise a few horses of your own,” Jubal tempted. He hesitated, then added, “We just want you to know it’s here and available.”
“We?”
“Josh and me. He wanted you and me to meet before he suggested it. I’m all for it. It’s wasted now, and I don’t want it to go outside this group.” With that, they headed back to the stables.
This group. It was a generous offer. Ross mulled it over as they rode back. It kinda made sense if he wasn’t deadset against permanence. He liked everyone he’d met and admired what they were doing. He didn’t think the offer was spontaneous. He suspected Josh had engineered the whole thing—Jubal and the others just wanted to meet him first. And they did that Sunday night.
There was still that sense of dread as he and Jubal approached the stable. But maybe now it wouldn’t be as debilitating as earlier. He had gotten through it yesterday and survived without making a fool of himself. Maybe the ranch had been healing for him.
They dismounted outside the stable, and he led Cajun inside. The horse nuzzled his neck as they entered, and Ross wondered if he sensed his rider’s unease that still plagued him. Ross made himself concentrate. Unsaddle the horse. Cool him down. Don’t forget a carrot.
“Thanks,” he told Cajun as he gave him the carrot. When he’d replaced the riding equipment in the tack room, he sought out Riley.
The bunkhouse was empty except for the vet. He was bouncing a ball on the Ping-Pong table. “Hey there,” Ross said. “You any good at that?”
“Used to be. Probably the only thing I was ever good at. When I was in the service, I was the champion for my unit. Do you know that it’s now an Olympic sport, or so I heard.”
“Nope. I didn’t know that.”
Riley put the paddle down. “Can we go outside?”
“Sure. I know just the place,” Ross said. “We can walk.”
Ross set the pace. They walked across one empty pasture until they reached a second, where four mares looked after foals frolicking at their heels.
Riley smiled for the first time.
“It makes me relax, too,” Ross said. He sat on the fence and Riley did the same. “I saw them yesterday,” Ross said. “There’s something peaceful about watching them. There’s such unbounded enthusiasm for life.”
Riley nodded, staring at a foal and its mother. “I have a kid,” he said. “My ex-wife doesn’t want me around him. She’s talking about getting a restraining order. I think I should go home.”
“Why doesn’t she want you around him?”
His head ducked. “I scared the hell out of them. I thought I was back in Afghanistan and was waving my gun. It wasn’t loaded. I made sure of that, but it frightened Doug, my kid. He’s eight.” He kept his head down. “It wasn’t the first time.”
Ross suspected there was more to it than that.
“Had she mentioned a a restraining order before?”
He nodded.
“She knows you’re here?”
He nodded again.
“What will she do if you go home early?”
“Probably make it worse,” he admitted.
Ross nodded. “Good thinking.” He paused, and then added, “I’m not an attorney or psychologist,” he said. “I’m not married and never have been so I have no background or qualification to give you advice. But as a friend, and I hope that we are friends, I think you need to prove to her you’re trying. That means staying here. Work like hell with your horse, work with me on developing a physical therapy regimen that establishes self-discipline. Talk to the others here. Know you are not alone. We all have some of the same problems.”
Riley nodded. “I rarely talk about mine.”
“That’s one of our problems,” Ross said. “Few of us do. We don’t want to look weak. But PTSD is not a weakness, not unless you think a good percentage of the military is weak. Along with a sizable number of civilians who have experienced trauma, physical or mental.”
Riley stared at him. “What...what are your...problems? If you don’t mind telling me?”
“Barns,” Ross said simply. “And you’re one of the very few people who know that. I don’t even have the excuse of it being caused by battle.” He had to be honest if he expected the vets to trust him.
“Barns?” Riley looked disbelieving.
“Something that happened there when I was a kid. I get flashbacks going into a barn or stable.”
“But you did it today. I saw you,” Riley said.
“I forced myself to enter after years of avoiding them. I almost didn’t come to Covenant Falls for that reason. I knew it would involve going into a barn or stable. I knew I would relive events I’ve tried to forget. But I owed a friend.”
“I keep seeing my buddy bleeding out and I couldn’t stop it,” Riley said. “I should have done more, something, anything,” Riley blurted out. “I can’t get him out of my mind.”
“Did you tell your wife about it?”
“No. I couldn’t. It was my fault. I trusted the attacker. I should have known there was something wrong with...” He stopped. “I can’t forget my buddy’s face and wonder, why him? Why not me?”
“I know,” Ross replied. “I was a medic and I remember the face of every soldier I lost. I have questions I ask myself. Could I have done more for them? If I had known more, could I have saved them? So you’re not alone. That’s why Jubal started this program, to let you know you’re not—we’re not—alone.”
Riley nodded.
“Anytime you want to talk, I’m here,” Ross finished. “I hope you stay.”
He stood and together they walked back to the bunkhouse. Upon returning, he pulled out his cell phone and saw that there were several messages. One was from Josh. He called back.
It was answered immediately. “Ross,” his friend said, “we haven’t had any time to get together. Can you come over for steaks tonight?”
“Sure, sounds good.” He’d heard from Jubal and others about Josh’s steaks. He also couldn’t quite believe the former grouchy staff sergeant was married with a stepson and a bunch of dogs. “Can I bring Hobo?” he asked.
“Of course. Nick would be most unhappy if you didn’t. He really took to Hobo, but then he really takes to everything with a tail, even lizards, much to Eve’s dismay.”
“What time?”
“Seven. Travis will be here with his wife, Jenny. You’ll really like her. She’s a former war correspondent and now a syndicated writer of travel adventures. She can probably tell you the best places to visit on your Pacific Coast trip.”
For some reason, he hadn’t thought about that trip in the past several days. He’d been too busy looking after his guys and Hobo.
“I’ll be there. Just give me the directions.”
There was a brief silence. “It’s complicated,” he said. “Susan’s coming from the inn. No sense in you both driving.”
No sense? He sensed a conspiracy but he didn’t want to say anything. “Sounds good,” he said. “Thanks.”
“I’ll see you at seven,” Josh said.
Ross ended the call. He had thought about riding this afternoon but he wasn’t eager to go into the stable again despite his talk with Riley earlier—not after last night’s flashback. And he was tired after a sleepless night. A relaxed dinner with an old friend was exactly what he needed. He also wanted to thank Travis. He’d been impressed with his notes about other programs.
And, dammit, he looked forward to seeing Susan again. He missed her and found himself looking for her.
Ross admitted to himself she was partly why he wasn’t as enthused about the trip up the coast as he was four days ago. He was already invested in the ranch’s guests. They had almost given up on being happy again. And he liked the comradery he felt with them, with Josh and Jubal. He hadn’t realized how much he’d missed being with army buddies.
He took Hobo for a walk, such as it was. The little guy was bouncing back quickly. He’d mastered walking with the new splint and was exhibiting curiosity. He wanted to sniff everything, as if he hadn’t had much opportunity in his past life. But then he would look back suddenly, and Ross knew the dog was checking on him, making sure he was still there.
He was getting used to Hobo. Even thinking, maybe, about finding a way to keep him.
Then he remembered how everything and everyone he loved had dissolved into thin air. He’d sworn to himself that he would never depend on anyone again, never risk his heart. It was why he was always on the move. Being a traveling PT kept life interesting. He made good money. Saw new places. Every job was a challenge, an adventure. He liked meeting people as long as everything stayed on a temporary basis.
Susan was not a temporary person. She was a salt of the earth type of person. She was a giver. It was a mystery why she wasn’t married now with two or three or four kids.
He sighed. Apparently keeping away from her wasn’t an option during the next ten days, including at dinner tonight. The image of her laughing with one of the vets yesterday wouldn’t leave his mind. What would it be like to have that kind of sunshine in his life?
But then he would risk losing it.
Susan worked on the payroll. It was her least favorite thing to do. It was reality, trying to balance income with expenses and provide what she thought should be a decent wage.
She badly wanted to give Mark, Judy and Janet raises. In lieu of that, she tried to compensate with flexible hours, overtime pay, free meals and whatever else she could do for them.
She’d given Janet the morning off. She could handle the desk and telephone as well as paying bills and doing the payroll. Her mind, though, was in a different place. It was about two miles down the road.
It had taken all her willpower not to join the morning run at sunrise, then ride with some of the vets. But there was no question that she’d neglected the inn and she needed time away from Ross Taylor. He’d become far too important to her in a very short time.
The phone rang. Caller ID reported it was Josh.
“Hi,” he said. “Surprised to find you there.”
“You’re a tough taskmaster, boss,” she replied.
“Ha!” Josh said. “Jubal said you’ve been invaluable these past few days at the ranch.”
“You know how I love horses and your vets.”
“I do. And yet you’re working this morning at the inn.”
“Your inn,” she reminded him.
“There is that. But I think it’s time you had some fun and relaxation.”
“And what would that be?”
“Grilled steaks at my house.”
She loved his steaks. She didn’t know what he did to them. It was a state secret, he contended, but there were none better. “Anyone else?” she asked suspiciously.
“Travis and Jenny.”
“And...”
“Ross,” Josh replied.
“You are not fixing me up, are you, Josh? You know how I feel about that. I can manage my own life, thank you.”
“No. Swear it. It’s just he doesn’t know anyone here.”
“He knows a lot of people now,” Susan countered. “He’s the Pied Piper at the ranch. He’s got all the vets and most of the staff out running at 6:00 a.m.”
“I heard about that,” he said with amusement. “But he hasn’t seen Travis in a long time, I suspect. And you and Jenny are friends. That’s it.”
“You swear?”
“Yes.”
“Do I get a bonus for coming?”
“On top of the steaks?”
“Yes.”
He sighed over the phone. “What about that painting you want for the inn library.”
“Done,” she said quickly. She’d been begging for a certain Western painting for months. It would complement the many Western novels and historical literature available there.
“You are very devious, Ms. Hall. Can you give Ross a ride over here? That bike might not startle Jubal’s horses, but I don’t think Beauty and the Beast will be as understanding.”
“Nothing bothers those horses much,” she shot back, “and what if Ross plans to stay late at the ranch today?”
“Jubal will take care of that.”
“I smell a scheme here,” she said, “but you’re the boss. I’ll pick him up at the inn at ten to seven. If he’s here.”
“Thanks,” Josh said. “I’ve been wanting Ross and Travis to meet up sooner, but Travis is in the middle of football season. He wants to catch up with Ross.”
“You’re going to have an entire army company here by the time you get through.”
“Makes you feel safe, doesn’t it?” Josh said.
“I felt safe before. Not so much since you called.”
“See you in a few hours, Susan.”
“Yes, sir.”
Susan hung up. She wondered if Ross was going to cooperate. Probably. Josh usually got his way. She smiled. The former Ranger staff sergeant was determined to grow Covenant Falls and make it a haven for veterans. He certainly wasn’t above a little bribery, like a painting for the inn library.
But it certainly put a crimp in her plan to avoid Ross Taylor.