It’s fortunate in many ways that we’re living in the age of the dysfunctional family. Even as recently as a few years ago, you were considered an anomaly if you sought professional counseling. Now, if you haven’t been in therapy, people assume you’re in denial. Take advantage of the times. If you have a problem that neither you, your friends, nor your support group can solve, don’t waste another moment. Seek professional help.
Be prepared for the possibility that the first person you see won’t have all the answers for you. When I got into counseling several years ago, I made a couple of false starts with inadequate or inappropriate though well-intentioned therapists. I was lucky: I found the right person on the third try. Don’t hesitate to look around until you find a therapist you’re compatible with. You can’t get to the core issues without a basis of trust.
Compatibility isn’t the only consideration. You also need someone who’s competent and well trained. If you’re having trouble finding the right therapist, ask your friends and associates if they know from their own experience who is good. Interview several before you make a decision. Trust your intuition as to which one will work best for you.
Also, don’t be put off by the therapy jokes that say you’ll have to spend the rest of your life on the couch. If you’ve found a competent therapist, you should be able to get to the heart of your issues in a couple of sessions.
If you don’t get an “ah-ha!” or two fairly early on, think seriously about trying someone else. Once you have a clear understanding of the issues you have to deal with, then the real work begins, and it’s not unreasonable to expect to work closely with a good therapist for six months to a year.
Most of us have some kinks that can be straightened out more speedily with professional help than if we attempt our own therapy. Though it may be frightening at first, working with someone who is professionally trained to deal with our wounds and defenses is an effective way to eliminate outmoded patterns that no longer work.
Therapy is one of the many tools we have available today to speed us on our way to understanding ourselves. If you feel you need therapy, don’t put it off any longer. It can go a long way toward helping to free you up for the inner business you came here to complete.