Years ago a yoga teacher I studied with guided us through a meditation in which we confronted our own death. Coming, as many of us have, from a culture in which death was never discussed, much less thought about, I found this somewhat startling at first. But after I’d gone through the exercise a number of times, I began to appreciate the benefits it offered. I started to see death as simply a natural process, and nothing to be afraid of.
Several years later I found myself in the middle of a hurricane with six other people in a very small boat on a very large ocean. I lived for forty-eight hours in the certain belief that we wouldn’t survive. When I thought about it later, I was amazed at how calm I felt. It seemed as though I’d done this many times before—which of course I had, through the practice of the dying meditation.
Many cultures throughout history have practiced dying as a ritual. It is a way to confront the fear of death in order to loosen its hold on us. Once you get into it, it can be quite liberating.
So practice dying. Do this as a meditation, and as an exercise in personal growth.
Set aside some time in the next week to imagine your own death. Lie down. Close your eyes. Imagine that you are dying. Where are your friends and family? What do you feel? What are they feeling? Is there anyone you have unfinished business with whom you need to talk to? What would you say to the people you will leave behind?
Then imagine that you are dead. Gone. The End.
This can be terrifying. Even if you envision that you’re surrounded by people you love and who love you, there comes a point when you have to take that last step alone. Even though it’s only an exercise, go with it. Experience that terror. It’ll free you.
After you’ve gone through your first imaginary encounter with your own death, spend some time thinking about other ways you might die: alone in your car on a deserted stretch of highway, or in an airplane crash with hundreds of other people. Run through all kinds of possibilities.
Engaging in the practice of dying, if done with sincerity and as an inquiry into the phenomenon of death, will liberate you from any fear of death you might have, and free you from many other fears as well.
Just think how you could live your life with full abandon if your fear of death were no longer there to hold you back.