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CAN YOU GET IT UP?


 

Within ONE WEEK of making these changes, you will

image Notice improvements in your energy level.

In ONE MONTH, you will

image Think more clearly.

image Have more consistent energy throughout the day.

image Notice a lessening of midday food cravings.

image Sleep more soundly.

image Awake more refreshed.

In ONE YEAR, you will

image Lose 20 pounds or more.

image Maintain a consistently high energy level throughout the day.

image Have more energy reserves in the evening for romance.

 

Terry, a home-health nurse, knew her energy slump had gone too far when, while unloading the groceries, she stored the milk in the cupboard and tossed the canned beans in the freezer. “That really scared me. All I could think of was, if I was that tuned-out on simple tasks, what mistakes was I making with my patients, my kids and the rest of my life?!”

 

She described her fatigue to her doctor, explaining that she often was cranky and snapped at both her husband and her kids, seldom had the energy to exercise and found herself dragging through the day, shuffling from one cup of coffee to the next. She was so exhausted at night that she often woke the next morning unable to recall the TV show she’d watched the night before. Her bloodwork came back normal, and the doctor concluded that she was doing too much for a woman her age. “On the drive home from the doctor’s office, I was fuming. My age? My age! Since when is 37 old? I’ve always had boundless energy, and never settled for anything short of the best. Now I was so tired that my whole life was mediocre. Right then and there I decided it was time to get my groove back!”

Terry was ready for a fatigue-busting makeover, starting with her diet, which needed a total overhaul. She would find that eating to fuel her energy from morning to night would bring back that “boundless energy.”

You Must be Up to be Sexy

Our energy level shapes who we are and how our lives unfold. It is the underlying source of passion, stamina, ambition, vitality, curiosity, joy and desire. Abundant energy encourages openness to new things, playfulness, willingness to change. It’s the “zing” in our lives, the “spark” in our humor and the “spring” in our step. Without abundant energy we are too pooped to pucker.

“Energy is eternal delight.”

—William Blake

Energetic people typically have self-confidence and, yes, irresistible sexuality. When you are upbeat, energetic and vibrant, you are physically more attractive and feel better about yourself. In other words, you feel sexier. More energy means you radiate self-assurance, and those vibes make people want to share your enthusiasm. So why do one in four Americans put up with a lack of “oomph” so debilitating that it interferes with their sex lives? Especially since making just a few changes in how you fuel your body can have such fabulous results!

Why is nutrition critical to your energy and sexuality? Because, just as a flower droops when you don’t fertilize and water it, so will your body. Each of the trillions of cells in your body, from brain to toes, is built and functions based on the vitamins, minerals, proteins, carbs, antioxidants and more that come from the diet. That’s where the S-Ex-Y Diet comes in. It supplies all the nutrients in the right ratios and amounts, which in turn restores hormone balance, jump-starts metabolism, improves blood flow and revs energy. It keeps you primed for peak performance all day long.

It turns out that Terry was experiencing an energy crisis, fueled by her bad food choices. Her family, work and other relationships were front and center in her life, but she had overlooked the most important relationship of all—the one with herself. The good news is that her energy-draining diet habits gave us lots of room for improvement in getting back her mojo.

Here’s an hour-by-hour account of how Terry ate to regain her energy, life and sexy self.

TERRY’S FATIGUE BUSTING MAKEOVER

BEFORE

 

AFTER

7:00 a.m. Wake up, coffee

 

7:00 a.m. Wake up, write 5 reasons why I deserve to be energized. Coffee, shower/dress, make lunches

8:00 a.m. Feed kids, shower/dress, coffee

image

8:00 a.m. Feed kids and self (cereal, milk, fruit)

8:20 a.m. Leave for work

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8:20 a.m. Leave for work w/lunch

10:30 a.m. Coffee

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10:30 a.m. Snack: Yogurt, nuts, orange, water

1:00 p.m. Lunch at the drive-through, coffee, large cola

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1:00 p.m. Exercise for 15 minutes. Lunch: Turkey sandwich on whole wheat, spinach salad w/oranges, carton of low-fat milk. Take multivitamin

4:00 p.m. Snack: Large coffee and muffin

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4:30 p.m. Snack: String cheese, whole-grain crackers, apple, water

6:30 p.m. Glass of wine, grazing while heating frozen dinners in microwave

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7:00 p.m. Dinner: Salmon, broccoli, salad, brown rice, red wine. Take calcium & DHA supplement

7:00 p.m. 2nd glass of wine with dinner

image

7:45 p.m. Brisk walk or stationary bike—30 minutes

9:30 p.m. Snack: Ice cream sundae, cookies, chips

image

9:30 p.m. Finish a project, make lunches

10:00 p.m. Crash in front of TV

image

10:00 p.m. Snack: Air-popped popcorn, chamomile tea

11:00 p.m. Collapse in bed, sleep fitfully

image

11:00 p.m. Snuggling with husband, sleep soundly

Fatigue-Busting Homework 101

I suggest two homework assignments to help kick-start your new energy program.

 

image Keep a journal Chart your energy level on a scale of 1 to 10 for each hour of the day. Note how much and how well you slept the night before, how much you exercised, and what you ate, how much, and when. Then look for patterns. Knowing your highs and lows can help you work with your energy, maximizing your peak hours and nurturing yourself during the lows. For example, do you notice that your energy is good in the early morning, but sags midafternoon? If so, choose menial jobs, like unloading the dishwasher or folding clothes during slump times and use your high-energy hours for creative work (and lovemaking!!). Does your energy level vary depending on how much sleep, exercise or coffee you have that day? Use that information to design a plan for avoiding the energy drainers and emphasizing the energy boosters, based on the tips I’m about to tell you.

 

image Buy a small notebook Every morning take one minute to write down five reasons why you deserve to take good care of yourself today. This will help focus your attention on the positive and is a clear reminder of how important it is to nurture yourself so you have the energy to nurture others. Finally, keeping those reasons in a notebook makes it easy to look back on the thoughts you’ve had over the past year. It is a moment to be grateful, and that gratitude is a part of feeling positive, energized, appreciative and sexy.

QUICK FIX ENERGIZERS

Sometimes you just need a quick-fix energy jolt. Try these tricks to liven your day:

1. Take a brisk, 10-minute walk outside in the sunlight, which revs you up and is a natural aphrodisiac, as it reduces levels of sex-inhibiting hormones.

2. Sniff peppermint or jasmine. Both alter brain waves and help boost energy.

3. Turn on some upbeat music and dance. (Suggestions: Aretha Franklin’s “Chain of Fools” or “Think,” Rod Stewart’s “Maggie May,” Michael Jackson’s “Beat It,” Justin Timberlake’s “Sexy Back,” Guns N’ Roses’ “Welcome to the Jungle,” Celine Dion’s “I’m Alive” or Beyoncé’s “Crazy in Love”)

4. Laugh, really hard and for real.

5. Act as if. Stand up straight. Smile. Walk with confidence. Act as if you are feeling your oats and it’s likely you’ll feel more energized.

The Morning Routine

image Terry was a breakfast skipper. “As soon as my feet hit the ground in the morning, I’m at a full run, so breakfast was an easy corner to cut. Besides, I wasn’t even hungry, so why waste the calories?”

Big mistake. Spacing your meals, starting with breakfast, is one of the six S-Ex-Y Diet guidelines. The morning meal not only jump-starts your day, it jump-starts your mood, energy, mind and metabolism.

 

People who eat breakfast within the first two hours after getting up:

  • have more energy
  • have a more sustained good mood
  • perform better at school and work
  • sleep better at night, which means they wake up the next day more energized and happy
  • learn faster
  • are more creative
  • pay closer attention
  • are more focused throughout the day
  • score better on memory tests

Breakfast lowers stress hormones to calm you through the morning hours. You will be less prone to uncontrollable food cravings and have a much easier time losing weight and, more importantly, maintaining the weight loss. In fact, 9 out of every 10 people who lose weight and keep it off eat breakfast almost every day. By contrast, breakfast skippers are four times as likely to battle the bulge. It is also impossible to meet all your nutritional needs if you skip breakfast. With all those benefits, it is no surprise that people who eat breakfast also have more energy, desire and interest in sex. But I’m not talking doughnuts and coffee.

“Breakfast lowers stress hormones to calm you through the morning hours.”

Barbara, a freelance writer in New Jersey, came face-to-face with how important breakfast was at the beginning of her career. “I was 23 years old, had just returned from a college job in Paris and was working for a major magazine in New York. I had been there a few weeks when my boss signaled me to come into her office. She said, ‘It occurs to me that you are a little dumb in the morning. Are you eating breakfast?’ It was a major turning point in my life. Up until then, I was totally unaware of my diet. My eating habits were awful. I skipped breakfast or grabbed a handful of cereal and a can of soda. And who else would think to eat a bag of thawed dinner rolls—uncooked?! I was young, but already was huffing and puffing up the stairs from the subway. That wake-up call got me eating breakfast. A little yogurt, fruit, an occasional egg. It changed my life. I started noticing a newfound energy, which motivated me to keep making more changes in how I ate. Now I’m not even tempted to eat greasy, bad food. I have so much energy, feel great, am never sick and am almost always in a great mood. I never had any of that before.

The Ménage à Trois Breakfast

What you do every day will have a far greater impact on your energy and sexiness than what you do once in a while. So, your goal for every morning is to restock your energy stores and set the stage for a day of boundless energy. The perfect breakfast is the Ménage à Trois breakfast (the Threesome breakfast). The three participants in this meal are:

image A whole grain: to provide needed high-quality carbs for mental energy during the morning hours.

image A little protein: to keep you satiated and maintain even blood sugar levels throughout the morning.

image Two colorful fruits and/or vegetables: to provide a hefty dose of antioxidants, which protect delicate brain tissue from damage.

This breakfast is based on the authentic foods in the S-Ex-Y Diet and emphasizes the magic threesome for weight loss: fiber, protein and fluid, which fill you up before they fill you out. If you are overweight, dropping a few pounds by eating the Ménage à Trois breakfast is critical to upping your energy. People who are overweight are much more prone to fatigue and sleep problems than their lean friends, which makes sense. Imagine carrying a 20-, 30-or 100-pound bag of sand around all day. Now imagine how much more energy you would have if you put the bag down. As overweight people lose weight, their energy returns and their sleep improves. The Ménage à Trois breakfast with those three weight-loss ingredients is one giant step toward dropping that extra weight and keeping it off.

In spelling out the details of the Ménage à Trois breakfast to Terry, I told her to choose:

 

image Whole Grains Carbs are especially important at this morning meal, since it has been 8 to 12 hours since you last ate. During that time, the body used much of its stored carbs just keeping you alive. Terry felt fine at first with a cup of coffee in her system and some sleep under her belt, but she was running on energy fumes and it affected her ability to think, work and say “no” to ice cream and chips later in the day. All grains supply the glucose your brain and body need to restock your fuel stores, but only whole grains keep blood sugar levels even throughout the morning, and supply lots of vitamins, minerals, fiber and phytonutrients not found in refined grains.

CEREAL RULES

Don’t be fooled by brands that say “Made with whole grain” or “A good source of whole grain.” Even Cocoa Puffs is made with whole grains. Instead, flip the box over and check the Nutrition Facts panel. A rule of thumb is that the higher the sugar, the lower the fiber. Remember the number 5. You want cereals with: no more than 5 grams of sugar and at least 5 grams of fiber.

The less processed, the more filling a cereal will be and the longer it will “stick with you” through the morning. You want cereals made from 100% whole grains and ones that taste great, such as

1 Kashi Autumn Wheat

2 Barbara’s Organic Grain Shop

3 Food for Life’s Ezekial 4:9 Original

4 Nature’s Path Organic Heritage Os

5 Shredded Wheat

image Lean Protein Low-fat protein is low in the artery-clogging, energy-draining saturated fats found in greasier fare, such as whole milk, bacon and sausage. It also has staying power to keep you full and satisfied through the morning hours. (People who complain about being hungry all day when they eat breakfast typically have had an all-carb meal, such as a granola bar and fruit.) When choosing milk or soymilk as a source of protein, grab brands fortified with vitamin D and the omega-3 fat DHA, since these nutrients fight fatigue, help reduce pain and headaches, and boost mood. Other protein options include nuts or nut butters, eggs or egg substitutes, low-fat cheese, salmon, fat-free or low-fat cottage cheese and Canadian bacon. Plain, nonfat yogurt also is a great source of lean protein, and its probiotics (healthy bugs such as L-acidophilus or bifidus) promote energy in people battling fatigue.

 

image image Colorful Produce Antioxidants that protect your brain and tissues from damage are in the pigment or color of fruits and vegetables. The more color, the more antioxidants. Selections are endless and include berries, watermelon, tomatoes, spinach, apricots and juices such as carrot, orange and grapefruit.

Jump on the breakfast bandwagon. It will take about two to three weeks to reset your appetite clock and see an a boost in energy. But I guarantee you will feel better! Just ask Camille. “I’ve always been a breakfast eater. But what I once considered a healthy breakfast, like an omelet with buttered toast, I realized had too much fat. I inevitably was hungry and ate too much later in the day. Now I have fiber-rich oatmeal or another whole-grain cereal topped with a few almonds, fruit such as blackberries and skim milk. This breakfast is so filling and it keeps me going all morning long!”

“The best way to keep energy flowing is to stop and refuel on a regular basis.”

Midmorning Quickie

image Want to feel sexy all day long? The best way to keep energy flowing is to stop and refuel on a regular basis (S-Ex-Y Diet Guideline #3), something Terry frequently forgot to do. That means a midmorning snack about three to four hours after breakfast. Three minimeals and a few snacks throughout the day keep your appetite under control, rather than it controlling you. Eat when you are comfortably hungry and you’ll choose the right fatigue-fighting foods. Wait until you are ravenous and you’ll eat too much of all the wrong stuff. There is nothing in a vending machine that will fight fatigue, so carry Quickie snacks, based on a few rules:

 

image Mix quality carbs with protein Carbs provide brain fuel, while protein fills you up and maintains blood sugar. Keep it low-fat and about 200 calories. Frisky Quickies include:

  • A 6-ounce tub of low-fat yogurt and a piece of fruit.
  • A small pouch of trail mix (Cheerios, nuts and dried fruit).
  • String cheese with whole-grain crackers.
  • A glass of DHA-fortified soymilk and grapes.
  • Hummus with sliced red bell peppers and half a whole-grain pita.
  • A sliced apple, 1 ounce Brie and 3 whole-grain crackers.
  • Low-fat ricotta cheese with a chopped fig.

image Add a drink Fatigue is the first sign of dehydration. By the time you’re thirsty, you’re already dehydrated. If it takes a glass of water to quench your thirst, then drink two or three glasses to rehydrate. The best bet is to front-load fluids by drinking a glass of water every hour throughout the day. Flavor it with a slice of lemon or a sprig of mint to make it more tempting to drink. Oh, and don’t forget fruit as a source of fluids. Watermelon is 92% water; a large slice has the equivalent of a glass of water!

 

image De-sugar it A sugary soft drink, candy bar or cookie might give you a quick surge of energy, but that burst turns to bust within an hour or two. One study found that a sweet snack perked people up in the short term but left them more tense an hour later, while a 10-minute brisk walk left them both energized and calmer for the next two hours.

To beat the bonk, steer clear of sugar. That doesn’t mean you must give up sweets. Just focus on fruit instead of added sugar, such as cottage cheese with orange slices or a slice of turkey with cranberry chutney and fat-free cream cheese on whole-grain crackers.

A DOZEN MÉNAGE À TROIS BREAKFASTS

1. A whole-grain freezer waffle, topped with lemon yogurt and fresh berries.

2. A toasted whole-grain English muffin, topped with smoked salmon, a scrambled egg and a thick slice of tomato. Serve with Tropicana orange juice.

3. Half a toasted whole-grain bagel, topped with peanut butter, sesame seeds and dried tart cherries. Serve with apple slices and a glass of DHA-fortified low-fat milk.

4. A slice of whole-grain crusty bread, topped with low-fat ricotta cheese and cherry tomatoes. Serve with grapefruit or carrot juice.

5. A bowl of whole-grain cereal, with vanilla yogurt, nuts and dried fruit. Serve with sliced cantaloupe.

6. Cook brown rice in DHA-fortified low-fat milk. Sprinkle with nuts, dried fruit and cinnamon. Serve with chopped mango and kiwi.

7. In a parfait glass, layer low-fat cottage cheese, pineapple, canned apricots and toasted wheat germ.

8. The Nibbler: 1 sliced apple, 1 ounce low-fat cheese, 1 ounce walnuts, olives and a slice of whole-wheat French bread.

9. Fill a whole-grain Mission Life Balance tortilla with almond butter, fresh berries and orange zest, and roll into a burrito. Serve with pomegranate juice.

10. Fill a whole-grain Mission Life Balance tortilla with scrambled egg substitute, low-fat cheese, black beans, corn and salsa. Serve with tomato juice.

11. Cook old-fashioned rolled oats or barley in low-fat milk. Toss in orange zest, dried cherries, cinnamon or nutmeg. Serve with orange slices. (Pack the cooked barley into a tight storage container and refrigerate. It will hold together so that you can slice it into “patties” and lightly fry those patties in nonstick cooking spray to make them crispy on the outside.)

12. Grab ‘n’ Go: A hard-boiled egg, whole-wheat French bread and an apple.

Midday Mojo Maintenance

On a typical day, Terry skipped breakfast, grabbed takeout for lunch, gulped down more coffee midafternoon, then attacked dinner like a ravenous wolf. With her hectic schedule, she’d forgotten the first and foremost rule—food is fuel. Just as you recharge your cell phone or laptop, you must regularly recharge your body’s batteries or your main squeeze (that would be your body) sputters, spurts and conks out midday. Of course, if you skip breakfast, there is nothing you can eat midday that will bring back the energy you have lost. In that case, the best you can do is struggle through the day one way or the other, then tomorrow start the day right by eating a Ménage à Trois breakfast. Assuming you’ve started the morning right, then the goal by noon is to maintain your energy and avoid slumps midday.

The Twosome Lunch

Breakfast is all about business, but a S-Ex-Y Diet lunch can have a little thrill factor as long as you follow these two energizing rules:

 

image image Keep it light In keeping with S-Ex-Y Diet Guideline #5 (Remember that size matters), a heavy meal makes you sleepy and spacey. The heavier or fattier the meal, the bigger the slump. It’s a delicate balancing act, where a little food gives you lots of energy, but eat too much and you crash. Consider fat a nickname for fatigue.

Terry’s fatty fast-food lunch also set her up for an ice cream binge that night. A neurotransmitter called galanin rises around noontime and turns on cravings for fat. The more fat you eat, the more galanin you produce, which makes you want even more fat. Order Wendy’s chicken caesar salad (8+ teaspoons of fat) or a chicken quesadilla at Taco Bell (7 teaspoons of fat), and galanin levels are jammed into high gear, increasing the likelihood that you’ll finish off the Ho Hos tonight.

 

image Add a little protein Don’t focus solely on carbs. A high-carbohydrate lunch, no matter how healthy (such as pasta primavera and a spinach salad) raises brain levels of the nerve chemical serotonin, which leaves you relaxed and even sleepy. A nap with your sweetie on Saturday is great, but if you have a job interview or a project to complete during the week, the last thing you need is a tanked energy level.

 

A light ‘n’ low-fat Twosome lunch in line with S-Ex-Y Diet guidelines and guaranteed to keep you frisky would be:

  • A turkey sandwich on whole-grain bread (try avocado, hummus, pesto, mustard or tapenade instead of mayo), a tossed salad (dressing on the side) and a piece of fruit.
  • A whole-grain tortilla filled with leftover baked sweet potato chunks, lowfat cheese, black beans and bottled black bean and roasted corn salsa. Serve with baby carrots.
  • A large tomato filled with tuna salad (use low-fat mayo), served with whole-grain bread sticks and a glass of DHA-fortified low-fat milk.
  • A slice of Passionate Peppered Pizza (in the Recipe section). Serve with watermelon cubes.

Spice up lunch with herbs, such as rosemary, peppermint or basil, which contain a central nervous system stimulant called cineole. Fresh or dried, these herbs might give you a mild pick-me-up. Mix rosemary into your tuna salad, peppermint into your iced tea and basil on top of the pizza. (While bee pollen flunked the energy-boost test, there is some evidence that the herbs gotu kola and ginkgo biloba fight brain fatigue.)

Ironing Out Fatigue

Another cause of Terry’s bone-numbing tiredness was iron deficiency. It didn’t show up on the bloodwork because the doctor had checked only for anemia. You can be iron-deficient for months, years or even decades without being so deficient that it progresses to anemia, yet the symptoms are the same. You’re tired, can’t think straight, live on caffeine and might battle sleep issues. Iron is the key oxygen-carrier in the body. Low iron means you literally suffocate the tissues (and brain), which is the fast track to fatigue, poor concentration, reduced work performance and a squelched sex drive.

Women have almost twice the daily requirement for iron as men, but consume half as much food as men do. As a result, as many as 80% of exercising women and 20% of women in general are iron-deficient. Women who eat little or no red meat are at particular risk, because about 30% of the iron in meat (called heme iron) is absorbed, compared to only 2% to 7% of the nonheme iron in dried beans, whole grains, dark green vegetables and eggs. That means you must eat 4 to 15 times the servings of kidney beans (at 2/3 cup a serving) to match the iron absorbed from 3 ounces of red meat.

What can you do? First, get feisty. Active women should request more sensitive tests for tissue iron levels, including serum ferritin, transferrin saturation and total iron binding capacity (TIBC). A serum ferritin value below 20 mcg/L or a TIBC value greater than 360 mcg/dL signals iron deficiency. Women who exercise more than three hours a week, have been pregnant in the past two years, menstruate heavily or consume less than 2,500 calories daily are at particular risk. (It’s unlikely you’ll need a supplement if you are a man or postmenopausal woman, so check with a physician before adding extra iron to your supplement plan.)

If you are deficient, your physician will likely prescribe iron supplements. In addition, consume several servings daily of iron-rich foods. Iron intake also is a balance between iron promoters and iron inhibitors. So,

image Combine a vitamin C–rich food with an iron-rich food, such as orange juice and a bean burrito. Vitamin C boosts iron absorption and counteracts some of the inhibitors in foods, such as phytates in whole grains.

image Mix small amounts of heme iron in red meat with large amounts of nonheme to boost nonheme iron absorption. Extra-lean beef with chili beans, pork in a vegetable stir-fry and spaghetti with meatballs are examples.

image Cook in a cast-iron skillet. The iron leaches out of the pot and into the food.

image Select iron-fortified foods.

image Drink tea and coffee between meals, since compounds called tannins in these beverages block iron absorption. Allow 90 minutes between a cup of coffee or tea and a meal to avoid the “tannin effect.”

image Take iron supplements on an empty stomach to improve absorption. If it causes stomach upset, try taking the supplement in small, divided doses.

Evening Energizers

Your goal from lunchtime to bedtime is to maximize evening relaxation and nighttime sleep. Living with a sleep deficit will undermine your best efforts to eat right and feel energized, alert and sexy. Even shortchanging sleep by an hour and a half is enough to lose up to a third of your normal alertness the next day. Lack of sleep leads to depression, stress, anxiety, fatigue, poor concentration and memory, weight gain, high blood pressure, elevated stress hormones and possibly even breast cancer and stroke. It more than doubles the risk for diabetes and increases heart disease risk by 40%. Lab tests show changes in hormones and nerve function in sleep-deprived 30-year-olds that mimic those of people in their 70s. In other words, lack of enough sleep increases your chances of facing The Big Sleep at an earlier age. Being sleep-deficient lowers levels of human growth hormone, which leads to muscle loss, suppressed immunity and increased body fat. It also might cause a drop in testosterone, which further lowers your sex drive and makes you crabby, moody and disinterested in socializing, which means no dates for you!

“You might think you are too busy to get enough sleep, but really you are too busy not to.”

If you need an alarm clock to wake up, you fall asleep within five minutes of hitting the pillow, you get drowsy listening to lectures or at meetings or you feel tired or listless during the week, then you are sleep-deprived. Chuck the excuses. You might think you are too busy to get enough sleep, but really you are too busy not to.

Are You Short on Sleep?

How do you know if you are sleep deprived? Respond to the following statements with a yes or no. Three or more yeses means you are one of the many sleep walkers who have become so used to grogginess they don’t even know they are tired!

If it wasn’t for the alarm clock, I’d sleep past my wake up time.

It is a major effort to get out of bed in the morning.

I have been known to hit the snooze button more than once on weekdays.

I often feel tired and cranky during the week.

I find myself not listening, having trouble concentrating or forgetting important things.

I often fall asleep for more than an hour as a passenger in a car.

I often nod off in boring meetings or lectures.

Plunk me in a chair in front of television and I am asleep in no time.

Many times I’m asleep within five minutes of turning off the light.

I am often drowsy when driving or doing routine chores.

I often sleep extra hours on weekends, if given the chance.

Caffeine Caresses

Most people know that caffeine is a minishot of speed. Within minutes of entering the bloodstream, caffeine amps up the nervous system, helping you think faster, remember more, feel energized and even be happier. A study from the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor found that women who drank a cup of coffee every day reported having more sex than nondrinkers, maybe because caffeine stimulates the nervous system and boosts blood flow, making them more sensitive to touch and quick to respond.

On the other hand, caffeine doesn’t really supply energy—it robs your body of it, because it revs your engine without giving it fuel. In no time, the false energy is replaced with real fatigue. You go back for another cup of coffee (or Red Bull, cola or tea) and wind up riding a roller coaster of highs and lows. In addition, compounds in teas and coffee (caffeinated, decaffeinated, herbal, black, green, red or white teas) block iron absorption by up to 90%. Worse yet, combine sweets with coffee, as Terry did with her midday snack of coffee and a muffin, and you have a double whammy guaranteed to leave you running on fumes.

Don’t get me wrong. You can have coffee or tea or any caffeinated beverage or food, just put a lid on the amount. A cup or two in the morning is fine. But fueling your day with coffee is like having one foot on the accelerator and one foot on the brake: Sooner or later you will strip the gears. Also, caffeine lingers in the system for hours. That monster drink you had at 4 p.m. could be the reason you toss and turn at midnight. Even a coffee-flavored yogurt can have the caffeine equivalent of a half cup of coffee.

The solution? Keep your coffee consumption to a few cups before 2 p.m. Or drink a small amount (like 2 ounces) of a caffeinated beverage several times a day, rather than all at once. Then cut off the caffeine by late afternoon. That will give you a gentler energy boost, but is less likely to disrupt sleep.

The Evening Meal

If you want to maintain your mojo until bedtime and then sleep like a baby, you must eat right at night. That’s what Rupa found. “I typically eat really healthy and have lots of energy. But every so often I’ll have the week from hell. Late-night dinners with plates piled with heavy, salty foods, mixed with lots of wine and fats from dessert. The next day I typically have to leave the office early because I am so tired! I literally crash and feel sick. High stress, late meals and heavy foods are the absolute worst mix for me!”

“A high-fat meal lowers testosterone by up to 50%.”

Big dinners make you temporarily drowsy, but they also prolong digestive action, which keeps you awake. A high-fat meal lowers testosterone by up to 50%, which can really put a squelch on lovemaking that night! Instead, try eating your biggest meals before midafternoon and eat a light evening meal. Include some chicken, fish or extra-lean meat at dinner to help curb middle-of-the-night snack attacks.

Spicy or gas-forming foods can aggravate sleep problems. Dishes seasoned with garlic, chilies, cayenne or other hot spices can cause nagging heartburn or indigestion, while the flavor-enhancer MSG (monosodium glutamate) causes vivid dreaming and restless sleep in some people. Gas-forming foods, such as cucumbers or beans, as well as eating too fast, cause abdominal discomfort, which in turn interferes with sound sleep. In short: Avoid spicy foods at dinnertime. Limit your intake of gas-forming foods to the morning hours and thoroughly chew food to avoid gulping air. Also, steer clear of fatty red meats and sauces that make you sluggish, as well as salty foods that dehydrate you.

 

Items that help bring on the zzzz’s include:

The Nightcap

Alcohol is a false friend. A nightcap might help you go to sleep, but not stay asleep. You’ll sleep less soundly and wake up more tired as a result. Alcohol and other depressants suppress a phase of sleep called REM (Rapid Eye Movement), where most dreaming occurs. It is in REM sleep where 70% of women and nearly all men have their lively sex dreams! Less REM sleep is associated with more night awakenings and restless sleep. A glass or two of wine with dinner is fine, but avoid drinking any alcohol within two hours of bedtime and never mix alcohol with sleeping pills!

Bedtime Story

The evening snack might be the best alternative to sleeping pills. A high-carbohydrate snack (remember the G-Spot snack from Chapter 1?), such as whole-grain crackers and fruit, air-popped popcorn or whole-wheat toast and jam triggers the release of the brain chemical serotonin, which aids sleep. A light carbohydrate-rich snack that supplies no more than 30 grams of carbohydrate before bedtime helps some people sleep longer and more soundly.(See Chapter 1 for more all-carb snack ideas.)

HERBS ‘N’ POTIONS FOR SLEEP

Ginseng: Might help regulate the sleep-wake cycle, and some herbalists swear that ginseng has aphrodisiac properties, but it also causes nervousness in some people and has hormonelike effects, so consult a physician before use. Siberian ginseng might be safer than Asian ginseng. Dose: 1–2 grams of the root or 200–600 milligrams of extract.

Valerian: Might have a tranquilizing effect, relaxing muscles and suppressing the nervous system. Few side effects. Dose: 400–900 milligrams.

Kava kava: Might have a sedative and relaxing effect, but should not be taken with antidepressants or with alcohol. Dose: 180–210 milligrams.

Melatonin: A hormonelike substance produced in a brain center called the pineal gland that helps regulate sleep. Supplements might improve light sleep, but may not induce a deep, restful sleep. Dose: 1–3 milligrams.

GABA and 5-HTP: This combo might help you fall asleep faster and sleep longer. No firm recommendations have been set, but some studies have used 2 grams/day of GABA and 100 milligrams of 5-HTP.

What about a glass of warm milk? Milk is a good source of the building block for serotonin, an amino acid called tryptophan. However, the protein in milk blocks tryptophan entry into the brain. No serotonin is made when you drink milk. However, any warm beverage, like a warm cup of milk or a cup of chamomile tea, does soothe and relax, and provides a feeling of satiety, which might help facilitate sleep. Add a bit of vanilla extract to milk to evoke a feeling of security or comfort.

Nighty Night

Finish off this energizing day with a sleep-lover’s routine by turning a Grand Central bedroom, filled with lounging pets, blaring TVs and leftover paperwork into a peaceful sanctuary. Beds are for cuddling, intimate talks, lovemaking and sleep. Hit the sack at about the same time every night (and get up at the same time in the morning). Experts swear that this routine helps set the body’s sleep-wake cycle. Take a warm shower or bubble bath, slip into something comfy and between clean sheets, turn off the lights and finish the day with sex, which raises endorphins that have a soporific effect.

In addition, a major difference between good sleepers and poor sleepers is not what they do at bedtime, but what they did all day. Good sleepers exercise and use every opportunity to move. Physical activity helps a person cope with daily stress and tires the body so it is ready for sleep at night. (See Chapter 9.)

Terry slowly changed her diet and daily routine and now has all the energy she needs to enjoy her life, work, kids and hubby. “I used to look at my husband like he was crazy when he’d get amorous. I was so tired I couldn’t remember my name some days, let alone feel like a roust in the hay. But now I’m the one taking his hand and leading him to the bedroom. You’d better believe I made a follow-up appointment with my doctor and let him know my energy had nothing to do with my age—it was all about how I was taking care of myself!”

Slump-Proof Your Life

There is no excuse to put up with fatigue as a lifestyle. Take care of yourself by eating the S-Ex-Y Diet, having a Ménage à Trois breakfast, a Twosome lunch, lots of water and a few super-nutritious Quickie snacks throughout the day, then keep your evening meal light, make sure to include some vigorous activity during the day and have a G-Spot snack just before bed. I promise you’ll be one sexy lover 24/7 in no time!