THINGS GET COMPLEX in this chapter, but one thing that is clear is that I love my family, all of it. Even the ones I was never really a father too, and yes, I have regrets there but I can’t change the past.
Nothing I do is uncomplicated and obviously I get myself into these binds. The broader family has few kids from many different ways and directions. None of it, except Christian, was planned. I spoke earlier about the early days with Beverley, so I don’t plan to do that here. Suffice to say my divorce from her in 1997 was more about financial pain than anything else, we had grown to a point where that was the best thing for the both of us.
When I first got to London it was so different to Australia, it was alive and so free and open. All the stories you hear about the place in the late 1960s, they’re all true. And for a confident young lad from Australia this was like a lolly shop. And maybe I took after the old man more than I realised; when it came to the desires of the flesh I was like him. I’m not now of course, but when I was younger I was a bit weak in that department.
Carnaby Street was in full swing and Earl’s Court was a lot of fun with all the Aussies. I was 19 and had a big share apartment with a bunch of other Aussies and there were parties on virtually all the time. We had various people coming and going at all times of the day and night. There was always something happening.
Kay was one of the girls who came around, a ‘counties girl’ who used to find her way to our place when she was in London. You’ve got to remember it was a very different time back then. We had some fun together and that led to the bedroom, but it was never very serious. After a while she hooked up in a more permanent way with one of the blokes sharing the apartment, Joe. She ended up staying with him in the apartment for a few weeks. One day there was a knock on my bedroom door and the two of them were standing there.
‘We want to have a talk with you. Kay’s pregnant, and you’re the father.’ I was already packing for my trip back to Australia and they were happy together, so that was it really. I don’t think they were after anything from me and I think they were happy with my approach.
They were together for a very long time and even moved to Joe’s native Tasmania. Emma was born and eventually they had two other daughters too. I think Emma had some sort of inkling that she wasn’t Joe’s daughter, but you’d have to ask her that. Her sisters are both natural blondes and she has jet black hair. It was when Joe and Kay split up that Kay and Emma had a bit of a talk one night around a fireplace and over a couple of glasses of red. I think that’s when it came out about me being her dad.
The first meeting with Emma was pretty emotional. She came up to Symmons Plains when I was there one weekend, and she turned up with her dog in the back of the station wagon. We all got together and went back to the hotel that I was staying at and had a big dinner and that was it.
She was in her 20s at that stage. Now 20-20 hindsight is a wonderful thing to have, but what has happened has happened and I cannot change that. Of course I would have liked to have been there, but from Emma’s point of view, she had a father and she was happily living with her family in Tasmania. It wasn’t for me to knock on the door and upset that.
I think between Joe, Kay and me we had an unspoken thing that they were going to bring her up and I would stay out of it until such time as they chose to tell her or she found out. I’m not a doorknocker and I respected that until it all came to its natural conclusion.
Emma and I talk nowadays, but I do wish I’d been there for the growing up. To watch her grow into the woman she has become. But as they say, such is life. She has two daughters now, so I have two grandchildren and that is special too.
Christian was next, the only one who was planned. We’d tried for quite a while to have children. Bev and I spoke about it for a while and we decided to adopt. It is one of the best things we ever did. One of the best things I ever did.
Christian was born and given immediately to Beverley. He was born on 27 September 1978. I was driving car number 27 and I was at the end of what was my best season to date. I left England for the Canadian and United States grands prix without any children and came home to a baby.
I couldn’t love Christian any more or any less, and as far as I’m concerned, Christian’s my son, end of story. I love him dearly. I hope that I’ve been able to give him all the things he wanted in life – except a Formula One drive. I had a fair crack at helping him out with that, but in his eyes I just didn’t do enough there. In my defence, I don’t think he pulled his weight fully in that arrangement.
He won the Asian Formula Three Championship. He came third and fourth in the Porsche Carrera Cup Asia when, and I know this sounds like a typical father talking, he failed to win both of them through no fault of his own.
Christian’s got a lot of ability and could be out there racing competitively today if he put his mind to it. But that is up to him.
It is funny, we look very similar and people often say he’s a ‘chip off the old block, it must be in the genes’. Particularly when he won the Asia Formula Three Championship but no, to his credit it was simply because of his ability. I think he was more inclined to go motor racing because he was my son than if he was a butcher’s son. I think you’re influenced by your surroundings and he shows that talent behind a wheel doesn’t need to be inherited.
Camilla is my next child and I suppose she helped me with my divorce from Beverley, whom I was still with when I met Robyn, her mother, through a mutual friend. Well, one thing led to another and we ended up in some sort of relationship, some people might call it an affair. I don’t think Bev was overly impressed with the situation when she found out; if only I was an Arab and was allowed more than one wife. Bev didn’t see it that way.
So Camilla was the result of that union, and she’s a lovely girl, very bright and very pretty. She’s currently working for lawyers in Canberra.
I don’t see her as much as I’d like. There have been several occasions where she’s been in Brisbane and I’ve had to go overseas. I’m sure a lot of the time she thinks I’m avoiding her, which I’m not. I do love Camilla, she’s my daughter and I wish I could spend more time with her.
So from that part of my life, the only regret I have is not being able to spend enough time with either Emma or Camilla. Today, I have a young family with twins that are still children – although they probably don’t see it that way – and that takes my time. Distance is also a major factor; I’ve got Christian and the twins up here with me on the Gold Coast, but Emma is in Tasmania and Camilla is in Canberra for the time being.
That brings me to Amanda, who I met a few months after I had separated from Beverley. Maybe 20 years ago, one of Amanda’s best friends was going out with a guy I know up here on the Gold Coast. I was out on the Broadwater on my boat and Bob – the boyfriend – was on his boat. We used to hook our boats up and tie a rope onto the bow, let it run the whole length of the boat in the current down to the back of the boat, and then the kids that were with us would jump off and follow the current, then grab the rope and come back on the stern. Along with those kids was me too.
Amanda came over on a jet ski to see how her daughter Amber was getting on and I thought, ‘Oh that’s not a bad sort.’ I did a bit of work there, but she didn’t want a bar of me. Initially, I think she only saw the bad side of me the first couple of times, the jungle juice. Eventually I wore her down and we went out to lunch and from that point on we’ve never really been apart.
This was me in salesman mode, I had to sell myself. I wore a shirt and tie to lunch in Surfers Paradise – that was working hard I can tell you now. People must have been laughing at me. But I was putting on Mr Nice Guy. It has worked out really well, Amanda is my best friend and I can’t imagine not being with her. It helps that she is successful in her own right. She is very bright and good at what she does.
Amanda had Amber and she was living with us when Amanda and I moved in together. Amber now lives up in the north of Queensland working as a teacher, but I think we thought that was it for us in terms of kids. The twins were not planned, in fact we thought we weren’t going to have kids together. I’d known Amanda for about four years when we were away for the Goodwood Festival of Speed and then went for a holiday in Spain. One day after we returned home, she asked, ‘Do you want the good news or the bad news?’ and then she told me she was pregnant with twins. I’m not sure which part of it she felt was the bad news.
As it turns out one was conceived at Goodwood and the other in Spain. Jack is the mellow one, so I’m sure he was England and Zara is feisty, so she’s got to be Spain. I prefer to think of it that way than to picture Zara as a feisty little me, and Jack as an Amanda.
I was already into my 50s when they were born, and now that I’m 70 they keep me both young and old. It’s given me a second lease of life. It’s good, I like it, I love it.
Amanda is a really great mother, and I’m not just saying this to earn brownie points. But she is a great mum and as a result they are growing up as great kids. Well I am old and I know it, so parenthood today is no challenge for me, I just hand them over to Amanda when I need to.
We all sort of fit in pretty well. Diane, that’s Amanda’s mum, lives up here and she’s terrific. She’ll come round and look after them or stay with them if we’re both away, given we both travel for work and often can’t change our travel dates. Diane has been an absolute godsend.
From the outside it all seems very complex, but for me it works. I can’t say it works or has worked for each of the kids, but I can’t change that. All I can do is look to the future and what can happen from there.
They’re all happy, healthy, good looking and great people. All is good. We’ve never all got together but I’d dearly love for that to happen. Who knows? There’s always next Christmas.