Darlene lifted little Janie and put her into the playpen. She was passing a rattle to her when the door knob turned and her husband appeared.
“Hi Keith,” she said, trying not to sound too happy to see him. She actually was very happy to see him. He was actually home on time, which meant he came straight home, and perhaps was happy to see her as well. But just in case he wasn’t, she lowered her eyes and put her attention back on Janie.
He approached her and kissed her on the forehead. She wished he hadn’t done that. It was a cold kiss. She could have gotten more passion from her dog.
He sat in the big easy chair that they both used to snuggle in together. He put his head back and just closed his eyes.
“Is everything alright?” she asked him sincerely.
“What do you mean by that?” he answered.
“My mother always said never answer a question with a question,” she replied. He continued to stare at her.
“I just meant that you looked tired; maybe you had a rough day,” she continued.
“Oh sure,” he said. “Yes, I am a little tired and yes today was kind of a rough day in the office.”
“Want to hold Janie?” she asked.
“Actually I’m a little sleepy,” he said. “I think I’ll lie down for a while. Just wake me when dinner’s ready.”
She didn’t respond. She just waited until he had closed the bedroom door before letting the tears fall. She could take it if he was upset with her, she thought, but he shouldn’t ignore our baby.
The infant tried to catch the tears as they fell. Perhaps sensing her mother’s unhappiness or just out of instinct, she threw her arms around her mommy’s neck and said something completely in babble.
“I love you too,” Darlene said, hugging baby Janie as tight as she dared. She then kissed her cheek and left her with her toys.
Darlene got up and went into the kitchen to prepare dinner. The phone rang as she headed toward the refrigerator. She thought Keith might get it; he didn’t. It stopped after three rings. He suddenly came out of the bedroom.
“Who was the call for?” he asked.
“I don’t know, it stopped after the third ring,” she said. “Maybe they realized it was a wrong number,” she continued.
“Yea, maybe so,” he said. “What’s for dinner? I have a taste for shrimp.”
“Well, I was planning on making a casse-”
“Another casserole?” he asked. “Not for me,” he said. “I think I’ll get some shrimp at Rene’s Café. I know you don’t like their shrimp, so go on with the casserole,” he insisted.
Twenty seconds later he was out of the door and she heard his car engine give that usual revving sound as he took off down the street. She was quite stunned by the suddenness of his departure. She kept rehearsing in her mind everything that happened. First he said he was tired. Then he said he was sleepy. Minutes later he wants shrimp and he leaves in an awful big hurry. She then remembered the telephone ringing and coming to an abrupt stop.
Oh God! she thought to herself, was that a signal? She suddenly lost her appetite. She was recalling every suspicious move he had made lately. She didn’t want to believe he was seeing someone else. But every time she was convinced that he might be unfaithful, she told herself she was overreacting. Consequently, she would lose her appetite and her nerve for confronting him about her suspicions.
She decided then to go and see the counselor again. Maybe he could offer her some advice. She felt she could use some at this point in her life. She wasn’t sure how much more uncertainty she could live with.
“Lord, don’t let me be a fool,” she said aloud. “I just don’t want to be anybody’s fool.”