“Yo ho, down below!” cried Blower from the crow’s nest, as they sailed away from the desert island where they had left Mainspring. “Pirate ship ahoy and it’s sailing straight towards us.”
“You hear that, my salty seacogs?” yelled Captain Clockheart. “Load the cannons, but hold your fire. We’ll give them no excuse to attack … but we’ll be ready if they do.”
Gadge pulled out his extendable telescopic eye to get a better look.
“What can you see, Mr Gadge?” asked the captain.
“Looks like a pretty standard ragbag mix of scallywags,” he said. “Hold on. Och, now there’s a familiar face and a few familiar tentacles, too… It’s Inkybeard!”
“Squid head’s back!” squawked Twitter. “Squid head’s back!”
“The Dread Captain Inkybeard.” Lexi’s word-wheel span and clicked. “The infamous pirate captain with—”
“A squid called Nancy on his head. Yes, yes, we know,” interrupted Captain Clockheart.2 However, as the nameless ship drew alongside the Leaky Battery, it became apparent that the creature resting on top of Captain Inkybeard’s black hair was not a squid, but an octopus.
“New friend, Inkybeard?” said Captain Clockheart.
“Yes, this is Nell, me new wife,” replied the pirate.
“What happened to Nancy?” asked Pendle.
The octopus squeezed the tentacle that was wrapped around Inkybeard’s neck, cutting off his windpipe. She allowed him to struggle for a moment then released her grip.
Inkybeard took a deep breath. “Ouch. I’ll ask you not to mention that name. Nell gets ever so jealous, so she does. She’s a little possessive.”
“So are we,” added one of Inkybeard’s pirates, with black teeth and a striped bandana. “And we want our treasure back.”
Inkybeard waved his cutlass at the pirate. “Quiet. As captain, Inkybeard will do the asking. Now, Clockheart, what have you done with my treasure?”
“What treasure?” said Captain Clockheart.
“Captain, look.” Pendle pointed to a perfectly round hole in the side of Inkybeard’s ship. A few planks of wood had been nailed over it, but it looked like the job had been done in a hurry.
“Yes, we woke up this morning to find someone had pilfered our haul,” said Inkybeard. “And we know it was you what took it! Yours is the only ship for miles around.”
“We know the rules, laddie,” said Gadge. “Pirates don’t steal from fellow pirates.”
“And we know that there is no such thing as a fellow pirate,” said Inkybeard. “Eh, Nancy?” A tentacle squeezed his shoulder. “Ow! Nell, I meant Nell.”
“We didn’t take your stinking treasure,” said Captain Clockheart.
“That’s right,” said Pendle. “The same thing happened to us.”
“Enough excuses!” said Inkybeard. “Now, we’re going to board your ship and retrieve our stolen loot, ain’t we, lads?”
Inkybeard’s brutish pirates picked up muskets, pistols and cutlasses. They lowered a boarding plank and a heavily tattooed pirate stepped on to it.
“If it’s a fight you be wanting, you’ve come to the right place.” Captain Clockheart jabbed his cutlass towards the pirate, who toppled into the ocean. “My marvellous metal marauders, defend our ship!”
The Steampunk Pirates grabbed their weapons and prepared to fight, but just then a voice from above cried, “Wait!”
Both crews looked up to see a young man with wavy brown hair, smart stripy trousers and a fashionable shirt.
Once he had everyone’s attention, the boy leaped from his position halfway up the main mast on Inkybeard’s ship, with his arms outstretched. He fell for a moment, then grabbed a rope and swung over to the jib. He used the sail to swing on to a crossbeam, spun round it twice, then soared into the air before landing gracefully on the deck beside Inkybeard. Everyone watched open-mouthed.
“Ah, Kidd, my boy,” said Inkybeard, patting him on the back affectionately. “We’re about to wreak our revenge on this shipload of steam-heads and take back our treasure.”
“With all due respect, Dread Captain Inkybeard, sir, and apologies for speaking out of turn,” said the boy. “I realize I am only an ever-so-humble cabin boy, but I do not think these iron gentlemen are to blame for our missing treasure.”
“Who is this wordy youngster, Inkybeard?” asked Captain Clockheart.
“This be our cabin boy,” said Inkybeard.
Kidd walked along the ship’s plank, bounced a couple of times then performed a triple somersault in the air and landed on the Leaky Battery.
“The name’s Kidd. You’ve probably heard of me.”
“No,” said Pendle.
“Really? They say I’m the best pirate’s cabin boy in the ocean. I’ve served on more pirate ships than you have barnacles on your keel. The Black Skull, the Flying Pig, the Cutty Razor, the Pimply Bottom… I’ve sailed on them all.”
“Aye, Kidd, but where’s our treasure if it’s not on their ship?” said Inkybeard.
“Oh yes, the treasure,” said Kidd. “I was considering this mysterious theft when I remembered a leaflet I was recently handed in Barbary Bay.” He pulled out a rolled-up parchment from his back pocket.
Captain Clockheart snatched it then handed it to Lexi to read out.
2 Lexi was actually about to say: “The Dread Captain Inkybeard, the infamous pirate captain with a reputation for sinking his own ships at the first sign of mutiny.”