Chapter 7
Rachael rose from the couch early Tuesday morning at Caleb’s haus. She fixed omelets for herself, Caleb, and Frannie. She scrambled eggs for Lily. She carried a tray into Frannie’s bedroom, and Caleb was there. “Frannie, I have breakfast for you. Caleb, yours is on the table.”
“Danki, Rachael.” Hands on hips, he gave Frannie a stern eye. “After you’ve finished your food, I expect you to dress and greet visitors. This day will be difficult for both of us. Lily needs you, and God will get us through this.”
Frannie accepted the tray from Rachael and lifted the coffee mug with a trembling hand. “Danki.”
“Do you want to attend the services today? Visit Stephen’s body before he’s buried? I’m sorry, Frannie. I realize this is all difficult for you.” Rachael covered Frannie’s hand with hers.
“I can’t face any of it. I’ll be in my room for the day. I don’t want to face anyone.” Frannie fixed her eyes on the tray.
Rachael followed Caleb out of the bedroom. “She chooses to hide away in her room. Maybe we should honor her wishes.” She worried Frannie couldn’t cope with being at the services. The widow hadn’t even asked about Lily. She didn’t want to push her to face the services today if she wasn’t ready.
“I understand she’s upset. But she has to accept this, and she can’t shut off the world around her. It’s not healthy. The more she withdraws and refuses to care for Lily or herself, I’m afraid she’ll grow worse.” Caleb answered a knock at the door. “Toby, danki for being here. Kumme inside.”
Toby shook his head. “I’ve got twelve men outside ready to unload benches from their wagons. Do you want some inside and out? It is sweater weather, and I’m hoping we have another sunny April day.”
“Yes. And the food tables can be outside.” Caleb stepped onto the porch. He held the door open. “Rachael, I’ll be outside if you need me.”
Rachael nodded. She was relieved Toby had distracted Caleb. She hoped Caleb wouldn’t insist Frannie dress and greet people. She could understand Frannie wanting this day to pass fast. She remembered the day of John’s services. Her true love was no longer the vibrant man she’d known. She’d wished she hadn’t viewed him in the casket and instead kept the last time she’d been with him alive burned in her mind. She’d leave Frannie alone and take care of Lily. She went to Lily’s room. “Good morning, sunshine.”
Lily held the railing and bounced up and down on her bed. “Rachie, up.” She stopped and held out her arms to Rachael.
She changed Lily’s nappy and carried her to Frannie’s room.
Lily held out her arms to Frannie. “Mum.”
Frannie had left her tray on the dresser. She was in bed and rolled to her other side with her back to them. “I’m sorry, Rachael. Please take care of her for me. I don’t have the energy to get out of this bed.”
“Very well.” Rachael left the room, and Lily buried her face in Rachael’s shoulder and whimpered.
She patted Lily’s back. “It’s all right, sweetheart.” She put her in the high chair and slid her omelet from the skillet onto a plate. She poured the scrambled eggs she’d put to the side to cool earlier in a bowl for Lily. She covered the skillet with the remaining omelet for Caleb. She and Lily emptied their plates, and then Rachael changed Lily into a fresh dress and set her in the playpen in the corner of the living room to play with her toys. Lily had a pleasant disposition and didn’t mind playing alone. Frannie had been blessed her boppli was easygoing.
Thirty minutes later, Mamm, Magdelena, Hannah, Ellie, Maryann, and other friends arrived. They cleaned the kitchen and greeted guests as they arrived. Hannah picked up Lily.
Rachael checked on Frannie. “Guests are here. What should I tell them?”
Frannie rolled to her side and met Rachael’s gaze. “Tell them I’m not up to greeting them or being a part of the services.” She closed her eyes.
Rachael left the room and organized the food outside.
Mamm came alongside her. “Where’s Frannie?”
“She prefers to stay in her room. She doesn’t want to face the guests or the services.” Rachael heaved a big sigh. “I’m worried. She’s shut herself off from us and Lily. I’ll stay here with her and Lily, instead of going to the burial. She shouldn’t be alone.”
“It’s been a shock for her, and staying with her is a good idea.”
Mamm’s friend pulled her away.
Magdelena pulled her aside. “How are you doing, dear friend? I can’t believe this has happened. Where’s Frannie?”
“She’s not up to greeting friends. This is a sad day for her, and I don’t mind taking care of Lily. My heart goes out to her. Her world has turned upside down with Stephen’s death.”
“I’ve not experienced a friend who has acted out this way, where they refuse to attend the services of a loved one or care for their boppli. Is there anything I can do?” Magdelena reached for Rachael’s hand.
Rachael clasped her friend’s fingers. “You’re already doing it by talking with me. I stayed here on the couch last night. This is a lot for Caleb to handle. He’s stepped into Stephen’s role with taking care of the land, haus chores, and Frannie and Lily. It’s a big adjustment.”
“Do you need time off from the bakery? We can ask Hannah to fill in.” Magdelena put her hands on Rachael’s shoulders.
“I don’t need to. Hannah can watch Lily. Caleb will be working. I’ll kumme after work to tidy the haus and cook meals if Frannie doesn’t resume life.” She loved Magdelena for her willingness to do whatever she could to help. She knew her friend would run the bakery by herself if she’d asked.
“Caleb is blessed to have you in his life.” Magdelena pointed to Hannah outside. “Hannah wants kinner, and she’s upset she’s not with child. I’m sure she’d love taking care of Lily until Frannie is up to watching her.”
“Yes. Lily loves her.” Rachael followed Magdelena outside.
Friends had worked like busy bees to prepare for the services now as they had for so many others. Caleb was surrounded by the husbands of her friends. Satisfied he was being taken care of, she headed inside and bumped into Bishop Fisher. “Excuse me. I should watch where I’m going.” She blushed. “May I offer you coffee or tea?”
“It’s my fault. I’ve been clumsy all my life.” He shook his head. “No coffee or tea for me. I’ve had more than my share this morning. Danki for asking. It’s time to begin the service. Please gather the ladies and have them meet outside and take their seats. I’ll let the men know.” Bishop Fisher stepped outside.
“Ladies, Bishop Fisher is ready to begin the service.” Rachael opened the door for them and followed them outside. She took Lily from Hannah. “Danki.”
She sat with her friends and held Lily. She had avoided the dining room all morning and she was relieved to be outside. Her heart sank knowing Lily wouldn’t grow up with her daed, and Frannie would be without her husband.
* * *
Caleb had shed tears in private last night in his room. He’d buried his face in the pillow and let his emotions erupt. Today, he’d prepared for the visitation and funeral, and now he had friends to talk to. He wished his friends could’ve had more time to get to know his bruder better.
Bishop Fisher opened the service with a prayer. He raised his head and opened his Bible. “We look forward to our forever home, but we don’t know when God will take us to Heaven.” He gazed out over the crowd. “Those of us who have had loved ones die miss them. I pray, Caleb, that you and your family will find comfort in knowing Stephen is happy and healthy with God. I understand Stephen had health problems, and now he’s no longer suffering. Please lean on me and your friends as you go through this difficult time.”
Caleb nodded. “Danki.”
He would miss their conversations the most. Stephen made him laugh, told corny jokes, and had more patience than any other man he’d ever known. Frannie had no reason to change her behavior, because Stephen allowed it. He didn’t understand how Stephen could’ve loved Frannie so much, in spite of her selfish attitude. Stephen had asked him to take care of Frannie and Lily should anything happen to him. Had he suspected he might not survive much longer?
Bishop Fisher spoke for two hours, led them in hymns, prayed, and dismissed them to the cemetery. He was grateful the Amish of Charm had purchased land for this purpose years ago. It was ten minutes away, and Caleb was thankful for the short distance.
Rachael bounced Lily on her hip. “I’m not comfortable leaving Frannie alone and I don’t want you to coax her to go with you to the service. She should mourn in her own way. I’ll stay here with her.”
“You’re a lifesaver. Danki.”
Toby pointed to his buggy. “Caleb, ride with Magdelena and me.”
“I appreciate the invitation.” He smiled at Rachael and walked with Toby to the buggy.
Magdelena was already seated inside.
They arrived at the site, and Bishop Fisher stood by the large hole, waiting for the casket. “Let us pray. Please bow your heads.” He offered a prayer to God and then spoke another message.
Caleb closed his eyes. He’d always disliked this part of funerals the most. His stomach churned. It was the finality of it.
Toby leaned close and whispered, “Remember, he’s not here. He’s gone to his home in Heaven.”
Caleb opened his eyes and nodded. Memories flashed through his mind. They’d fished, swam, played games, and been there for each other through sad and difficult times. His parents’ deaths had been hard to accept, but they had grieved and supported each other. He’d expected to make many more memories with Stephen.
Bishop Fisher motioned for two of the men to lower the pine box holding Stephen’s body into the grave. He offered another prayer to God. “Please return to Caleb’s haus and partake of the food the women have prepared.”
Caleb wanted to run to the buggy and leave the burial site as fast as he could. He’d washed and dressed Stephen’s body, and it had been the most difficult task of his life. He’d let tears flood his eyes. From that moment on, he hadn’t visited the casket until now, and he was relieved the casket was closed. He hurried to the buggy, and Toby and Magdelena kept up with him. They got inside the buggy.
He said, “Danki, you both, for your friendship and support. You’ve made this day bearable for me.”
Toby held the reins and glanced over his shoulder at Caleb in the back. “Don’t hesitate to reach out to me for anything. It’s what friends are for, and you’re courting my schweschder. We might be family someday.”
Caleb smiled. Any man would be blessed to have Toby for a bruder-in-law. He’d connected with Toby right away. And Toby had introduced him to his friends at after-church meals and included him in conversations often. He was thankful Toby and Rachael had made it easy to make friends in Charm. Toby had a resemblance to Rachael in appearance, but not much. He had brown eyes instead of green and a square jaw, where Rachael’s was rounded. They both had big hearts and were willing to help most anyone. Magdelena was also a sweetheart, and he could understand why Rachael was close to her. The two of them acted like schweschders as well as best friends. Toby was a blessed man to have found Magdelena.
“I would like nothing better, and that is my plan.”
Magdelena grinned. “Rachael has been beaming since she’s been courting you.”
“Me too.” Caleb stared at the road. He had promised Stephen he would take care of Frannie and Lily, but with the way Frannie was acting, he didn’t know what it might mean. They were his responsibility now. He didn’t want to think about that today. He pushed the thought from his mind.
* * *
Rachael opened Frannie’s bedroom door. “Are you awake? Is there anything I can bring you?”
“Is everyone gone?” Frannie stayed covered in bed.
“They’re returning from the burial to partake of the food the women have prepared. Would you like me to fix you a plate?”
“Please.” Frannie raised her head.
Rachael closed the door, but only part way. At least Frannie would accept food. She checked on Lily in her playpen.
Lily hugged her Amish doll and picked up a wooden horse with her other hand. “Horsie.”
“Yes.” She tousled the boppli’s hair and went outside to where the crowd had gathered to fill their plates. Magdelena was next in line. “Do you mind if I get in front of you? I’m fixing a plate for Frannie.”
“Of course not. And fill one for you also. We’ll use the kitchen table and share some of our food with Lily,” Magdelena said.
“Perfect.” Rachael filled the plates and followed Magdelena inside. She set her plate on the table and the other one on a tray for Frannie. “I’ll take this to her. Will you put Lily in her high chair? She’ll love the noodles, cooked carrots, and peas.”
“Be happy to.” Magdelena grabbed a tin plate and scooped food onto Lily’s plate.
Rachael pushed Frannie’s bedroom door open to carry the food in. She was surprised Frannie sat up in bed. “Here you go.” She positioned the tray over her lap.
Frannie dipped her spoon in the mashed potatoes. “Would you like anything else?” Rachael gripped the knob and glanced back at her.
Frannie shook her head. “I don’t know how I’ll live without him. Thank goodness Caleb will take care of us. I’m sorry this will end your courtship.”
“What do you mean?” Rachael gulped.
“I’m sure Caleb understood Stephen to mean he should marry me if something happened to him. It will be for the best. I need a husband, and Lily needs a daed. I need a man who will be here each day to help me take care of Lily. He will also need to take care of the haus and the farm chores.”
Rachael’s cheeks warmed. “Caleb has a say in this. He can take care of you and Lily without marrying you.”
Would Caleb marry Frannie to fulfill a promise he made to Stephen? It wasn’t uncommon for a widow to marry her dead husband’s bruder. Caleb would be miserable having Frannie for a fraa.
She’d help anyway she could not to have that happen. “I can also lend you a hand.”
“You don’t have a boppli and you’ve not been married. I’m young. Caleb owes it to me and his bruder to marry me. I can give him a good life and more kinner. After what’s happened, it’s wrong of you to stand in our way.”
Rachael was dumbfounded. She gripped the doorknob until her knuckles hurt. Was Frannie right? Frannie had showed no sign of being capable of living with her dochder on her own. What would Caleb have to say about all this?
She exited and closed the door just shy of it being shut all the way. She trembled. Frannie had said she could give Caleb more kinner. She walked to the living room window and watched Ellie and Liza with their precious little dochders playing together. Kinner of all ages caught her attention.
Joy and Thad waved to her and grinned.
She waved back. She had gotten close to the two kinner, and she’d begun to feel like their mamm. Something she had wanted for a long time. She hadn’t told Caleb everything. Frannie might have a point.
* * *
Caleb came inside after the last buggy had left. “We loaded the benches and tables we borrowed, and Toby and his friends will return them to the shed on the Yoders’ property. Do you need help in the kitchen? I can’t believe the time is seven already.” He faced her in the living room.
“I fed and put Lily to bed. She was exhausted. She was passed around to many of our friends and loved the attention. She’s such a friendly boppli. Magdelena cleaned the kitchen before she left. Are you hungry?”
He patted his stomach. “I’m full from the food all the ladies brought. I’ve had enough. How about you?”
“I’m stuffed also.”
“Let’s relax and enjoy time for the two of us.” Caleb patted the cushion on the settee beside him.
“I should look in on Frannie first.” She left and returned. “She’s asleep. She did finish half her breakfast and dinner. I’m hoping she’ll dress and take care of Lily tomorrow.”
“She’d better. It’s ridiculous how she acted today. It’s not easy for any of us, but we do what we have to.” He wished she was more like Rachael. A strong, caring, and selfless woman.
“Don’t judge her. I can understand why she wanted to avoid the guests, the casket, the bishop’s message, and the burial. She’s made acquaintances but not close relationships with any women. Hannah has made the most progress winning her over, but she’s had to work hard at it. We need to encourage her to participate in future socials and to stay longer after Sunday services. She always seemed in a hurry to go home.”
“Frannie built her life around Stephen and Lily and me. Her parents had her late in life and didn’t expect much from her. Stephen was a born caregiver. He doted on her as much as her parents. Her mamm died in her sleep and her daed passed away a year later, working in the garden on a hot summer day. Stephen said he thinks the man died of a broken heart. He wasn’t the same talkative and jolly man once his fraa died.”
“Frannie must have traits Stephen found attractive. It’s understandable why he found her pretty. She has silky brown hair and beautiful round eyes. She has a slender frame and dainty features.”
Caleb rolled his eyes. “She’s attractive and she can be a doting mamm to Lily when she chooses to. Stephen said she made him feel needed and they were best friends. He didn’t mind she expected him to help her clean, cook, and take care of Lily. He’s responsible for giving in to her demands.”
“What will you do? She’ll need you.” Rachael fiddled with a stray thread on her sleeve.
He watched her. She wouldn’t look at him. He didn’t want her to question his love for her under any circumstances.
He placed his finger under her chin and turned her face to him. “I love you. I’ve put off buying a farm for us, but no longer. I’m meeting with Bart Byler on Monday to buy his place. He’s leaving the furniture and equipment. He’s moving to Lancaster, Pennsylvania, to live with his dochder’s family. He’ll be eighty-five this month.”
“I know the place. Good choice.” Rachael grinned. “I’m happy for you.”
“You can be happy for you too. Once I have the place and figure out how to take care of Frannie and Lily and this farm, I’ll propose to you.” Caleb would marry her tomorrow, but he wanted to have a home to offer her and give himself and Frannie a week to figure out what would work best for both of them.
“You may want to speak with Frannie before you buy another farm. You can’t manage both properties.” She fumbled her hands and dropped her gaze.
“I’ll hire a man to take care of Stephen’s place.” He reached for her hand. “Nothing Frannie can say will change my mind.”
She rose. “It’s getting late. I should head home. I’ve got work tomorrow. Are you all right to care for Lily in the morning? If Frannie isn’t fit to care for her, Hannah would wilkom her for the day.”
Caleb faced her and held both her hands in his. “What’s wrong? Do you have doubts about us? You’re not your usual cheerful self.”
He couldn’t remember saying anything to her she might have found offensive or worrisome. She’d said she loved him. Why was she acting odd?
“You’ve been wonderful. I’m tired and have to work tomorrow. I need to get some rest and so do you. If you need me tomorrow after work, kumme by the bakery and let me know. I’d like to give Frannie some privacy and a chance for you to discuss the future with her.”
“All right. I’ll walk with you to your buggy; I hitched it earlier.”
They went outside and walked in silence, holding hands.
He kissed her soft lips. “I’m buying the Byler haus for us. I promise.”
She nodded and got in the buggy and accepted the reins from him. “I love you, Caleb, with all my heart. I pray you sleep sound tonight.”
“I’m comforted knowing Stephen is no longer in pain. He tried to hide it, but he winced and held his side and bent over fighting to catch his breath often. I’ll miss him every day.” His lips quivered. He swallowed. “Be careful going home, my sweet Rachael.”
“I will.”
He didn’t move until she disappeared around the bend. He loved her and he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. He had no doubt Frannie would be a challenge. What did she expect of him now Stephen was gone? Stephen had asked him to take care of her. His stomach churned. He was afraid to dwell on the answer.