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Lucas
Bella stared at Lucas while keeping up a constant stream of chatter. A true comfort considering his mind and motor functions had returned to their anxiety-induced frozen state he'd spent most of high school in. It happened every time Kayla Whitworth (his longest-standing crush before Bella) walked into a room, and they shared most of their classes.
Or maybe his loss of motor function and inability to speak was more like freshman year (and every other year since) at Columbia after he met Bella. Back then, she'd latched onto him as a friend when he'd had no others. Even when Lucas had been sure Chris was going to get him thrown out of the university for looking at him the wrong way. And snorting at him on the first day of their Business 101 class. Bella befriended him.
Did Bella notice his frozen state? No. When his hearing worked properly again, he heard her talking at length about Christmas plans. The cookies they would make this year. Ice fishing, including her yearly threat of throwing Chris down the hole in the ice, etc. But, seriously, the entire time, Bella stayed turned toward him, staring and turning his brain into a puddle of mush.
In no time, Phil pulled in front of Bella's apartment building. He'd double-parked only long enough to free Bella's Christmas tree from the roof, pull out Bella's boxes from the trunk, and set them on the sidewalk.
Seconds after Phil left to find a proper parking space, Lucas realized he was alone. Phil circled the block and found a parking space several buildings away, but Bella was dragging the tree on her own into the building. Lucas snapped out of his daydreams, ran after her, and lifted the trunk off the ground.
“Bells! Wait for Phil.”
"He speaks!" she said and beamed from behind the tree's branches. "Phil'll catch up." She mumbled something about the man being psychic, and he'd absorbed evil powers from her mother.
Inside the building, the tight turns pinched Lucas against the tree and wall several times until they made it to her apartment. Phil, in the unique way he'd perfected in his years of Astor family employment, appeared out of nowhere behind them. His key to Bella's apartment was ready before either of them could pull theirs out. He didn't even wither under Bella's very Astor-like glare as he held the door open for them.
“Ma’am,” Phil said with a placid smile.
"I'll 'ma'am' you," Bella complained.
Lucas noted the knowing smirk Phil gave him and the ornament boxes at his feet before bidding Bella a goodnight and that he would pick her up in the morning.
"Don't you dare!" Bella threatened.
But he tipped his hat to her and bid her goodnight again, disappearing into the hallway.
Stamping her foot, Bella glared at the door. “Chris is an ass! He... he...”
He'd planned so much more than having his driver cart them around to get a Christmas tree in a romantic location.
Lucas learned to keep his mouth shut. He was certain Chris arranged for most of what had happened tonight.
A realization hit him. Lucas realized they'd been so distracted by everything that they had grabbed ornament boxes but not a tree stand. However, sitting on top of the ornament box, Phil had left a tree stand.
Bella swiped the stand, stripped off her jacket, and after they’d bolted the tree into the stand, her sweater came off too. Lucas assumed his own sweating had been because of Bella and her proximity, the way she touched his arm to get his attention to ask a question, or so on.
They'd set up the tree in the space between her television stand and the door to her bedroom. Really jamming it in. Bella lay under the tree, bolting the tree into place, creating more mushy brain in Lucas when her leg caressed his.
“I said, wiggle the tree,” Bella, apparently, repeated herself with a giggle.
“Right. Yeah. Sorry,” Lucas said. He wiggled the tree.
Satisfied, Bella fetched water. After a second trip under, needles from the tree caught in her hair when she crawled back out. Lithely, Bella hopped onto the couch next to Lucas, the box on the floor between them, and beamed at him.
“Well?” Bella asked. She watched him expectantly.
Oh, my god. What were we talking about?
His mind went completely blank. Lucas' only thought was to clean the pine needles out of her hair.
“You okay?” Bella asked when he said nothing.
“Uh, yeah.” He gingerly reached out. Bella didn’t flinch away — she never did — and pulled a needle from her hair.
"Thanks." She sent her hands through her hair and pulled a few more stuck in her now unkempt curls. "I was asking if you wanted dinner. All we've had so far is cocoa."
"Dinner?"
"Yeah! I can cook... something. We did just get groceries, and you are always making me dinner. I assume you got enough to make more than one meal."
Lucas kept staring. “Groceries?”
"My brother works you too hard." Bella's lilting laugh sent his heart fluttering. "We could order food instead. Thai? There's that new place a few blocks away. I think they're still open." Bella scooted closer to him, kicking open the ornament box. Goosebumps traced lines up her arms.
“Are you cold?” Lucas asked.
“No.”
Was it his imagination, or was she scooting closer again? "Let's order. I'd rather go through ornaments with you."
Bella patted around for her phone, back pockets, and non-existent front pockets, then frowned. She shoved her hands into the gaps of the couch and came away with nothing. He didn't feel her hand slipping into his pocket and grabbing his phone until he saw it out. Bella's shoulder leaned into his, her head resting on his shoulder.
“Lucas?” she asked, her voice trailing off.
He pulled at needles trapped in her hair he hadn't seen before. She smelled of nothing but fresh-cut fir trees. Suddenly, Bella jerked up, her head smacking Lucas' jaw.
“I’ll... make dinner.”
"Bella?"
"It's fine." She hustled into the kitchen, tossing his phone on the couch next to him.
The air, the entire mood, shifted so suddenly Lucas was thrown off balance.
A phone call popped up on his phone. Anita Viglia. Their coordinator at Macy’s for their upcoming event. Lucas groaned and moved off to Bella’s bedroom to take the call.
"Director Holt," he answered, his tone clipped now. "What can I do for you, Ms. Viglia?"
“Oh, I saw you saw my text and... well, I just wanted to see if...”
"Now is not a good time. I thought we cleared up all the issues for this weekend."
"We did. We... did," Anita repeated the words, mostly to herself. All traces of the usually perky woman was gone.
"Great. Whatever it is, we can discuss it this weekend."
Anita brightened. "Okay!"
A pained sigh escaped Lucas. What turned Bella’s mood?
Lucas couldn't imagine he'd done anything to make Bella's mood turn. That's when it hit him. Anita said text. Fuck! A text? What did she say in the text?
Anita Viglia (Macy’s Contact): Would you like to get dinner with me? Maybe after the Astor Pharm Santa’s Village event? (you really need a better name for that)
No. This wasn’t happening.
Bella read this. On accident, but she read it.
Lucas' hands trembled as he rasped, "Bella?"
“Hmm?” She was sauteeing something, eyes fixed on the pan.
“It’s... it’s not what it looks like.”
Bella’s eyes met his. From across the apartment, he saw the undeniable shift in her mood. A distance they’d never had before. “You should have told me. You’re always so quiet about girls you like.”
“No. That’s not...”
“I’m happy for you.”
He needed to fix this. Words like ‘I love you’ were on the tip of his tongue, but the moment was gone. And Bella would just think he was being shy or quiet and probably wouldn't take him seriously.
"Put on a movie. I'll finish dinner," Bella said, her voice frigid.
***
Bella
––––––––
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Bella took every one of those ridiculous emotions Alicia’s ridiculous babbling brought to the surface and tried stuffing them away in a lockbox in her mind. Friends for what... 12 or 13 years now? What was wrong with her?
Yes, Lucas made her happier than anyone. When she's with him, there's a contentedness, a safety, a comfort they've always had with each other. In the night, when fear or a nightmare gripped her, Lucas held her and kept her warm. Or knew precisely what to say to calm her when she woke up...
She was being silly. He had his own life and deserved to be happy.
One more night. She could try to be normal for one more night. Forget about Christmas. Let Lucas have his date with Anita without Bella interfering. To have the chance at his life without trapping him with her.
Bella put on a smile, and they ate dinner on the couch. After dinner, they dug through their handmade Christmas ornaments, lights, and garland. And by the end, she drifted off to some holiday movie with a twinkly tree filled with the best memories, her best friend beside her.
In the morning, she’d just be Bella Astor, his friend. His completely platonic friend that no one would mistake for a girlfriend.
She wouldn't screw up his chance with Anita.