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Skirts!

I can remember exactly the day I met Nadima. It was the day I got my three big brothers to wear skirts to school. Yes, seriously.

It was summer, and boiling hot, and everyone was sweating away in long black trousers. So I’d started this petition to wear shorts and I wanted to get the entire school to sign it. I was launching the campaign by wearing my PE shorts to school, so I asked my mate Lily if she’d wear hers too and she said yes. Then she went and told her mate Kara, and Kara told her not to because she’d get into trouble. So the night before, right at the very last minute, Lily texted me.

Sorry Jaz. Not wearing shorts to school. Lil x

Seriously? Thanks a bundle, Lil. It wasn’t like her to do that to me, but I might have guessed Kara would stick her big nose in.

So then I’d had the brilliant idea of getting The Brothers to wear skirts!

They thought it’d be a laugh. Me too. Well, it seemed like a good idea – at the time.

That morning, as we all piled out of Mum’s car at school, everyone was pointing and laughing. To be fair, The Brothers looked hilarious! Miniskirts are so not the right fashion statement for any of them – they just don’t have the legs! Or the shoes!

‘I want to die, now,’ moaned Dan, tugging at his skirt.

‘I am going straight to the toilets to change,’ announced Gus.

Technically Gus is the youngest Big Bro – but he’s going to be the biggest. He’s only in Year 9 but he’s as tall as Dan already, and Dan’s in Year 11. Matt’s my oldest Big Bro – he’s in the sixth form. He stood glaring at me in the drop-off area and muttered, ‘I look ridiculous.’

He was right. He’s six foot two, and his skirt barely covered his boxers.

‘Man up, Big Bro!’ I laughed, slapping him on the back. Then we trooped into school – and walked slap bang straight into the head teacher.

Mrs C instantly launched into us for ‘not wearing school uniform’.

‘Yes, we are!’ I argued. ‘These are my PE shorts and those are school skirts!’

‘School uniform for boys is trousers, not skirts,’ she replied.

‘Does it actually say that boys can’t wear skirts?’ I challenged.

‘Well, no,’ she admitted. ‘Not as such.’

‘Well then!’ I retorted. She gave me a look over the top of her glasses.

‘Jaz Watson, I’ve lost count of the number of times you’ve broken the school rules, and you’re only in Year 7. Are you trying to get in the Guinness Book of Records or something?’

‘No, miss! And anyway, I only break the stupid ones.’

Mrs C raised an eyebrow. Matt gave me a nudge and Gus trod on my foot.

‘You’re heading for an after-school detention,’ warned Mrs C.

There was a sharp intake of breath from The Brothers.

‘Seriously, miss?’ I protested.

‘Yes, seriously,’ she replied. Then she made us change into ordinary uniform – from the lost-property box. I ended up in a skanky pair of trousers about six inches too short. They looked gross, smelled worse and I looked totally stupid in them.

As soon as I walked into our form room Kara snorted with laughter.

‘What are you wearing?’

So then of course everyone stared at me.

‘A ballgown,’ I replied, sarcastically – which got a huge laugh from everyone except Kara.

‘But I thought you were going to wear your shorts?’ she said, trying to look all innocent.

‘I did. Mrs C made me change.’

Kara turned to Lily. ‘I told you she’d get into trouble.’

Lily grimaced. They were both sitting on their table, with Chloe and Elly.

‘As a matter of fact, I didn’t get into trouble,’ I said, sort of truthfully.

(I didn’t mention that Mrs C had threatened me with a detention. And anyhow, I didn’t care. It was for a good cause.)

Sliding into my seat at the next table, I dumped my bag on the floor. ‘Actually, Mrs C asked if I was trying to get into the Guinness Book of Records.’

‘Are you?’ gasped Chloe. ‘That’d be so cool!’

Honestly, Chloe would believe anything.

‘No, you muppet!’ I laughed.

‘So why were you wearing shorts?’ asked Elly.

‘She’s launching a petition so everyone can wear them,’ explained Lily.

‘Awesome!’ said Ryan. ‘I’d sign that.’

‘Me too,’ nodded Liam. Ryan and Liam are the class clowns and they sit on my table – which is a good laugh. I got out the petition and they signed it. Wow, I thought, two whole signatures.

‘I wasn’t meant to be the only one wearing shorts,’ I said, looking directly at Lily.

Her face fell, which was fine by me.

‘Don’t give Lily a hard time!’ snapped Kara. ‘You can’t expect everyone to do what you want.’

Which was pretty rich coming from her, and I was just about to say so, but then Mrs W, our form teacher, came in.

Kara spent most of registration whispering to Lily and flicking me sharp little looks – so I guessed she was talking about me.

Oh, how absolutely great.