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Charity Challenge Week

First thing on Monday morning I headed to the staffroom. I was soooo not looking forward to this. There’s nothing worse than a gloating teacher, is there?

Apparently there is.

It’s a whole room full gloating teachers.

(Groan.)

But anyhow I did it. I apologised. And I somehow even managed to make it sound like I really meant it. (I didn’t, obviously.)

When I got finally into class, Nadima was the centre of attention. It turns out that Mrs C had emailed her parents to say how sorry she was that the history homework had upset them so much.

Huh! I thought. She should have said sorry the stupid homework had been set at all. But it was better than nothing, I supposed.

Just then our form teacher arrived, so we all slid into our seats. I suddenly had this brilliant image of our history teacher being made to stand in front of Mrs C’s desk while Mrs C told her off!

‘D’you think Mrs B got a roasting?’ I whispered to Lily.

She grinned. ‘Yup!’

‘Serves her right!’

‘Again, yup!’

Which made me smile.

But not as much as what Mrs W said next.

‘Right, 7R. Charity Challenge Week is upon us! So that means no lessons this morning!’

Cue cheers!

Charity Challenge? Yes! I thought. This was my time to shine!

‘So I hope you’ve all come armed with lots of brilliant fundraising ideas! Everybody will be divided into teams of six,’ said Mrs W.

Everyone instantly started calling out and gesturing, until Mrs W said, ‘Calm down – I’ve already sorted you into teams.’

Cue furious howls of indignation from the entire class.

‘That’s not fair!’

‘Why can’t we choose our own teams?’

‘Because Charity Challenge Week is important. It’s about being entrepreneurs and coming up with serious business ideas that are going to make as much money as possible for charity. It’s not about larking around with your mates,’ announced Mrs W pompously.

Everyone in the class slumped back miserably and looked bored to death.

‘Oh, come on! Cheer up!’ said Mrs W. ‘There are prizes for the team that raises the most money!’

At which point everyone sat forward again, eyes glinting greedily.

‘Every member of the winning team will win a book token,’ announced Mrs W.

A book token?! I thought. Seriously? Why would I want a book token? I’d rather have cash! And I’m pretty sure the rest of 7R felt the same way too – judging by the way they all groaned and slumped back again.

LOL!

Then Mrs W added eagerly, ‘And they get to choose the local charity which will receive all the money raised by the whole school!’ Funnily enough, even that awesome honour didn’t get 7R leaping out of their seats with enthusiasm.

Nadima and I got put in a team with Liam and Ryan and Lily and … Kara.

Oh, how absolutely brilliant.

I didn’t mind having Liam and Ryan – they’re always good for a laugh and I figured they’d pretty much do as I told them to. Obviously I was pleased Nadima and Lily and me were together. But I just knew Kara was going to be a massive pain in the bum. And guess what? I was 100 per cent right.

‘Your first task is to choose your fundraising project,’ Mrs W was saying, ‘so everybody move round so you can sit in your groups. You’ve got until break. If anyone is stuck I have some ideas here,’ she finished, waving a tatty old folder around.

‘We have to do something to make money,’ I explained to Nadima. She nodded.

‘Like washing cars,’ said Ryan.

‘Actually, that’s not a bad idea,’ said Liam.

‘I am not washing cars!’ announced Kara.

‘No,’ said Nadima with a dead straight face. ‘Is bad idea. Break nails.’

I snorted out loud.

‘Right,’ said Kara, ignoring me and taking charge. She got out her planner, opened it at the back and sat tapping her pen on the page. ‘Ideas?’ she demanded.

‘How about a cake sale?’ said Lily.

‘Soak the teacher?’ suggested Ryan.

‘Battle of the Bands!’ cried Liam.

Cue him and Ryan leaping up on their chairs and playing imaginary guitars – with full sound effects of course.

‘Ryan and Liam, GET DOWN!’ yelled Mrs W.

‘There isn’t enough time!’ I laughed, as the boys sat back down. Fyi, each year group had been given a two-hour slot in the hall. Ours was on Thursday afternoon. ‘And anyhow, your guitars are out of tune!’

It was time to roll out my brilliant ideas.

‘How about “Dress Like a Zombie Day”? Everyone will want to do it and, since there are fifteen hundred kids in the school, if we charge £1 a head we’ll make £1,500!’

Ryan and Liam were well up for it, and I could see Lily thought it was a good idea, but Kara pulled a face. ‘I can’t see any of the girls wanting to do that,’ she said.

Btw, she was wrong, but it didn’t matter. I had lots more ideas. ‘OK. How about a raffle for something mega like, say, a PlayStation?’

‘Where are we going to get a PlayStation from!’ scoffed Kara.

‘We’ll get a local shop to donate one. They’ll do it for the publicity!’ I explained. She rolled her eyes, so I gave up on that. ‘Or how about the Ultimate Swap Shop. Get everyone to bring in their old clothes and stuff, and sell stuff for £1. Even if only half the school buys something, we’d still make £750!’

‘I’m not running a second-hand clothes stall! That’s a rubbish idea!’ announced Kara.

‘No, it’s not! Actually I’m going to set up a website doing just that!’

‘Yeah? Well, good luck with that!’ she said sarcastically.

If Lily hadn’t been there, I would have given Kara a right mouthful.

It was obvious she wasn’t going to agree to anything she didn’t want to do. She suggested: a fashion show, a talent show (what a surprise) and a nail bar. A nail bar?! Fortunately the boys crushed all those ideas, so I didn’t have to.

‘Head-shave?’ cried Ryan. ‘Sponsored head-shave!’

‘Yes!’ whooped Liam.

‘Brilliant idea!’ I said. (But only because I’d love to see Kara bald.)

‘You’re not taking this seriously,’ she complained.

‘Sweets?’ suggested Nadima suddenly. ‘Make sweets?’

We all stared at her, gobsmacked that she’d:

a) been able to follow the conversation and

b) come up with an idea.

She shrugged. ‘Everyone like sweets!’

‘That,’ I said, remembering what her parents did for a living, ‘is not a bad idea.’

Even Kara was up for it. ‘I make the best Rocky Road!’ she announced modestly.

‘My nan makes Peppermint Creams,’ said Ryan. ‘She’ll make a ton if I ask her.’

‘We used to make that Fridge-Fudge, Jaz!’ said Lily. ‘D’you remember?’

Before I could answer, Kara butted in and pulled a ‘sad face’. ‘But I need you to make Rocky Road with me.’

Lily looked torn.

But then Nadima said, ‘Is OK. Jaz with me. We make Turkish Delight.’

‘But you tried selling that before and nobody wanted to buy it!’ objected Kara.

She was right, but I didn’t want to crush Nadima. My dream of breaking the school record for fundraising crumbled like a chocolate flake.

Then Nadima grinned and announced, ‘Ah, but this time, we make … with chocolate!’

‘Chocolate Turkish Delight?’ repeated Liam, his face lighting up greedily.

I grinned back at Nadima. ‘Chocolate Turkish Delight? Now that is an inspired idea!’