24
First Date Redo

Tuesday, October 9, 8:38 PM

Tristan: Hey.

Dorian: holy shit

hi

I’m really trying my best to seem calm right now but for the record I’m completely freaking out

Tristan: Noted.

So Dorian . . .

There’s this guy at school.

And I was friends with him.

Good friends.

And I think I messed things up. And I could use some advice.

Dorian: . . .

??

ok I’ll bite

tell me about this friend

Tristan: He’s really important to me. More important than I can express in words. He means so much to me . . .

But recently I found out he was keeping a big secret from me. And, well, I got mad at him. And we haven’t spoken since.

Dorian: ok

this friend of yours

did he mean to hurt you by keeping this secret?

Tristan: I don’t think he did . . . not anymore. But I thought so at the time.

Dorian: you know tris

people keep secrets for lots of reasons

sometimes they hide the truth because they’re worried that it might hurt someone they care about

did you ever ask him why he kept it a secret?

Tristan: No, but I should have.

My friend Rose, she said that he was probably hiding the truth from me because he wanted me to learn it on my own terms, at my own pace.

Dorian: rose seems pretty wise

Tristan: She can be.

Dorian: so now that you know that your friend never intended to hurt you . . .

where are things going to go from there?

Tristan: I don’t know yet. I figured I could talk to him. I haven’t spoken to him in a while.

Not since it happened.

Dorian: how long ago was that?

Tristan: More than a week.

Dorian: that’s a long time to go without talking to someone you care about

Tristan: I know.

And I feel awful about it.

I really want to tell him I’m sorry, but I don’t know how.

Dorian: well you can always practise on me

Tristan: Okay . . .

I’m sorry that I got so angry at you. I now know that your intentions weren’t bad. I wish I could have seen it at the time.

I’m also sorry that I yelled at you in public. Definitely not one of my finer moments.

And mostly, I’m sorry for leaving you hanging, not knowing whether we could go back to the way things were between us. Not knowing if we were even together anymore.

As friends. Of course.

Dorian: of course

Tristan: And I’m sorry that I didn’t come to my senses earlier.

Dorian: you know what?

Tristan: What?

Dorian: I think if you said that to your friend he’d forgive you

Tristan: You really think so?

Dorian: I do

I mean . . .

if I were in his position I’d forgive you

Tristan: Thanks, Dor.

Dorian: hey tris

Tristan: Yeah?

Dorian: I’ve also been struggling with some stuff at school

can I talk it out with you?

Tristan: Of course.

Dorian: so there’s this guy

he’s . . .

well he’s everything to me

and recently I made him upset by doing something stupid

and I apologized to him

a lot

more than I’ve ever apologized before

but he didn’t forgive me

instead he ignored me

for a while

and it really hurt

I was sad for a long time

it wasn’t the first time he’s ignored me like that

and it took a lot out of me

Tristan: Have you spoken to him about this yet?

Dorian: not yet

he’s going through his own stuff right now and I feel awful bringing it up

but part of me feels like I need to tell him

otherwise we’ll never be able to move on

Tristan: Yeah, I get that.

Dorian: and I honestly can’t imagine my life without him

I really can’t

and I’d take him back in a heartbeat if he’d have me

but . . .

but there’s a part of my mind that wonders what if it happens again?

I honestly don’t know if I could handle that

Tristan: I think you should tell him.

I have a feeling that this friend of yours doesn’t know just how much he’s hurt you.

If you tell him the truth about how you’re feeling, I think it might help him realize just how hard you’re taking it.

I have a question, Dor . . .

Dorian: ya?

Tristan: If he apologized, would you forgive him?

Dorian: without a doubt

but I don’t need an apology

I know he didn’t mean it

and I know he’s sorry

I just . . . I want to make sure that nothing like that happens again

Tristan: Trust me, if you explain that to him, I’d be willing to bet that he’d promise never to ignore you again. He’d promise to never leave you hanging and to talk things out, even if it’s hard for him.

Dorian: if he made a promise like that it would help so much

that would mean the world to me

Tristan: I think you two might even end up being stronger for it. Because once you communicate properly with someone, dealing with problems gets a little easier.

Dorian: I agree

I wish I could give you a big hug right now

Tristan: I mean, this virtual hug is nice.

But . . .

Didn’t you say the other day that we live close to each other?

Dorian: I did.

Tristan: Would you want to meet up at some point? You could give me that hug for real.

And we could finally see each other for the first time.

Dorian: ya

that would be nice

I’d like that

you know

tomorrow’s a school day

want to maybe grab some coffee after?

we can just talk

Tristan: I’d like that, Dorian.

Dorian: perfect

I’ll see you after school

Tristan: So . . .

Not to spoil the mood or anything, but I’m kind of a few episodes behind on Basker.

Dorian: it’s still early

wanna watch one of those basker episodes now?

Tristan: There is literally nothing that I would rather do right now.

Dorian: excellent

lemme just grab a torrent

Tristan: Yeah, I need to download it too.

Dorian: I’ve missed this tris

Tristan: Yeah, me too.

Dorian: oh

um . . .

apparently daisy says hi

and she says she’s happy she doesn’t have to beat you up

Tristan: Tell her to stuff it.

Dorian: yeah no thanks

I’m not telling aj’s girlfriend to stuff it

lol

oh that was fast

my episode is done downloading

Tristan: Mine just finished, too. Ready?

Dorian: play


Tristan: That was a good episode. It’s nice that the boys got to meet each other after so long.

Dorian: ya

Tristan: Okay, I’ve gotta get up early tomorrow. I should head to bed.

Dorian: same

goodnight tris

Tristan: Goodnight, Dorian.

I love you.

Dorian: I love you too