I may climb perhaps to no great heights, but I will climb alone.
–Cyrano de Bergerac
Two weeks fly by at warp speed.
My parents are ecstatic. Even though they still don’t really understand the concept of the work I’ll be doing, they’re happy I found something I enjoy that isn’t bearded lady at a circus.
Scarlett has offered an escape if staying with my parents becomes intolerable. She and Guy live in a palatial apartment on the Upper East Side. But they also live with Guy’s teen sisters—twins—and Scarlett only moved in with him recently. Talk about intruding. I should have started apartment hunting already, but I’ve been slammed with making preparations to move myself and my meager belongings across the country, finishing out my last two weeks at Bodean’s, and spending every spare minute with Beast.
I’ve been memorizing our moments. His smell, his taste, the feel of his scruffy jaw under my fingers. Each sensation is amplified a thousandfold knowing our time is numbered.
Despite the bonding, apologetic conversation with Grace, she’s been avoiding me and when she’s forced into my presence, she barely talks. She doesn’t even fight me for the bathroom in the mornings.
All of this makes my last shift at Bodean’s a muddle.
“Hey, Lucas.” I grab an apron from the cupboard.
“Wait.”
I freeze, apron in hand and turn.
“Before you put that on, Ranger wanted to talk to you up front.”
I grimace. “This isn’t going to be an awkward goodbye thing, right?”
He chuckles. “I’m sure it’s nothing of the sort.”
I push open the swinging doors to enter the bar area. It’s dark. “Is there a problem with the power?” I call back to Lucas.
The lights blink on and— “Surprise!”
Mouth agape, I just stare at the small group clustered in the center of the room, whooping and laughing at my no doubt ridiculous face.
Lucas comes out of the kitchen behind me carrying a sheet cake with the words Congratulations Fred! Scrawled in bright blue and red frosting.
So naturally, I burst into tears.
I’m immediately surrounded by people, Granny patting me on the back. “It’s your party and you cry if you need to.”
Eliza smacks me on the shoulder. “Pull yourself together, woman. You have to see the food Beast made. You didn’t tell me your man was a chef.”
Reese is on my other side, giving me a sideways hug. “We were going to invite more people, but Beast said you don’t like big crowds.”
“Thank you,” I tell her sincerely, wiping at my eyes.
“I totally get it.”
They draw me over to a table festooned with ribbons and decorated with superhero paraphernalia. Lucas sets down the sheet cake and I get a closer look. The o’s in congratulations are Spider-Man and Black Panther faces.
The rest of the spread follows the same theme: Batman bun sandwiches, a fruit tray of strawberries, bananas, and blueberries arranged to make Captain America’s shield, and Wonder Woman lasso fries.
I lift my gaze and lock eyes on Beast.
A thousand thoughts and feelings flash between us, words rendered unnecessary. I walk around the table and reach up. He meets me halfway, kissing me senseless in front of everyone. Whoops and hollers surround us, but it doesn’t matter.
I pull away to look into his face, his arms still around my waist. “Thank you.”
One more quick kiss and then Annabel yanks me away to the dance floor where Jude has set up two Doctor Who–style telephone booths. He explains the challenge—to see who can change into a superhero costume the fastest—and I laugh.
Grace is already inside of one of them pushing buttons and messing with the door, sliding it open and closed.
Granny brought her girlfriend, Elaine, who we all met at supper last weekend. They’re very formal with each other in front of us, but also sweet when they don’t think we’re watching. Elaine makes sure Granny gets an extra-large slice of cake after we eat.
We spend a couple of hours playing games, laughing and talking. Granny wins the superhero challenge. Ranger teases Annabel and Jude about some night when he caught them making out in his office, a story they refuse to elaborate on. Lucas talks to Beast about recipes, and Eliza informs me that when I leave, Beast will be moving from security into the kitchen. Ranger and Eliza also take great delight in teasing me and telling everyone how I manhandle the bar accoutrements and clean like I’m trying to murder all the dirt.
I very vehemently blame Caroline for all of the ill treatment, much to Beast’s delight.
Later, I get a moment to talk with Jude while the others are distracted. Despite a little voice in my head telling me to let it go, this time, I just can’t. “Remember how you told me to take care of Beast’s heart?”
He nods, his gaze curious.
“You should take care of it, too. Make sure when you ask him for help with things that it’s not the morning after a late shift. And that he’s taking time to do what he wants, instead of what makes the rest of you happy.”
His brows lift, mouth popping open. But then he huffs out a breath, pressing his lips together and grimacing. “I suppose you’re right. We do tend to take advantage of his helpful nature and he wouldn’t be the type to deny assistance to anyone.” He tilts his head. “I can see you have his best interests at heart.”
I smile, though I’m sure it looks a little wilted. “Thank you for listening and not getting defensive.”
“When you love someone, it’s not about being right. It’s about doing what’s right. We are none of us perfect.” He nudges his shoulder against mine. “And that’s all right.”
Afterward, Beast drives us back to his house. We’re alone, the others staying behind to help with cleanup.
We walk into the house hand in hand.
“Thank you,” I tell him once we’re in his room together. “Most of the time, even for my birthday, my parents just take me to dinner or whatever. No one has ever done anything like this for me.”
He mouths and signs at the same time to make sure I understand, You’re worth it.
I reach up and grab his face. He leans into me and then we’re kissing. The gentle press of mouths and the slide of tongues are familiar and comforting, but also tinged with a thread of desperation.
This is it.
Our last night. He’s driving me to the airport tomorrow afternoon and then . . . who knows when I’ll be able to kiss him again?
I shove the thoughts away and focus on taking off his clothes. I want nothing more than the press of his skin against mine, his warmth surrounding me. I want to crawl inside him. His lips trail from my mouth to my jaw and down the length of my neck.
“Beast.”
He moves back and looks at me.
“I want you.” I search his face to make sure he understands my meaning. We haven’t had sex yet, but I want it with a force that’s almost frightening in its intensity.
He nods and mouths, Yes. I want you, too. So much.
“Are you sure?”
He smiles. Pulls his phone from his pocket and types, Worried about my virtue?
“I am, like, three years older than you. Practically a cougar.”
His smile widens. Consider me corrupted. I giggle, and this time he signs, I want only you. Everything. You.
My laughter dies. I force the word through the lump in my throat. “Yes.”
Then his hands are at my clothes, unbuttoning my work blouse, his large fingers trembling as he slides each button out of the small holes.
As soon as my top meets the floor, I’m tugging at his T-shirt. He pulls it over his head and then the rest of our clothes find themselves tangled together around us.
I’m a jumble of sensations. The press of his mouth to mine, the whisper of his hands mapping out my body with the tips of his fingers. I push him down to the bed and then straddle him. The hard length of him pressing my most sensitive spot yanks a gasp of pleasure from me. I am not going to last long, at least not this first time.
“Condom?”
He nods at the bedside table and I lean over to grab it, sheathing him before our mouths connect again. I sit up, wanting to watch him even as I possess him.
Grabbing his length between us, I position him and then settle myself around his length. I move slowly, taking care, adjusting to his size. He fills me, stretching me in the best of ways until we are fully merged. Once he’s all the way in, I maintain our visual connection, not wanting to let go of it even for a second. His eyes gleam, dark as night. His fingers trace up my skin, giant hands clasping around my nape, thumbs brushing my cheeks, holding me with a fierce devotion I feel all the way down to my toes.
For long moments we breathe together, joined in the most intimate of ways.
Then I start moving.
Before long, he’s gasping, his hands moving down, clenching my hips. I move with rhythmic slowness, up and down. The pent-up emotion, the love, the loss, it’s all there in the rigid line of his body, his taut cheeks, his skin stretched tight over his bones. His features are stark, hardened with passion.
I move faster. His hands smooth up my skin, thrumming at my nipples, then one hand slides between our bodies, rubbing me just how he knows I like it. An orgasm rips through me like a tidal wave, his name on my lips.
He pumps up into me, his hands seizing my hips.
Then he’s shuddering, gasping, falling with me and we land back on the earth together.