Chapter 4

I don’t drive. Mom was diagnosed the day after I got my permit, and I decided I wanted to spend time with her rather than learn how. I don’t bike because bike seats make my business end sore even when I’m in top condition. Due to my coccyx situation, which had by mid-October gotten a little bit better, biking was a total no go. And so on that epic Saturday morning, I set out by foot.

When I have full range of motion, it takes me about twenty-five minutes to get from my house to the Corrigans’ home. But I hadn’t run or really even walked any distance in seven weeks, so I made slow progress up and down the hills of Bluffton. It took me nearly an hour to get to Maggie’s. Of course, if I hadn’t run into Brad Schwartz and Akilesh Sharma on Main Street, it would’ve been more like forty minutes.

Sharma is one of my good buddies, but he’d been visiting relatives with his parents all summer and was mostly taking college classes (instead of wasting his giant Sharma brain in high school), so we hadn’t spent any time together for a while. He was pretty concerned about the state of my butt. He was all, “How could such a weird injury even take place?” So to show I valued his place in my life, I took the time to explain how it happened, even though I was monkey-jacked to discuss our baby with Maggie.

No, dingus! I did not tell Sharma and Brad the good news. I’m a gentleman. I sort of believed Maggie planned for this baby. (She had to be smarter than me, right?) But I wasn’t positive, and I didn’t know for sure if Maggie even knew she was pregnant. Certainly I wouldn’t be the one to let the mouse out of the sack with the general public.

After I left my good buds behind, I walked the last couple of autumn tree-lined blocks to the giant home inhabited by that blessed Corrigan family filled with blond girls. I figured that Mom and Dad Corrigan would be less than thrilled by the developments at hand (pregnant Maggie), so I calmed myself and thought, Don’t just blurt it out! Don’t just shout it out to the whole Corrigan world! I was excited, so it was going to be hard.

I found Mrs. Corrigan, Misha, and Molly raking leaves into a giant pile near the raised tomato bed where my butt had nearly met its death.

“Top of the morning to you, Corrigan ladies!” I called.

All three turned to me and stared. It was the first time I’d been to the house since the accident. I wasn’t surprised by the reception. How would you feel if you saw the person who nearly fell to his death standing in the very yard in which you were now playing with leaves? I didn’t blame any of them for my trouble, so I put on my most gracious face.

“How are you all doing this fine fall day?” I asked.

Misha smiled. “Want to jump in my leaf pile, Taco?”

“It’s my pile too!” Molly squealed.

“No—no jumping,” Mrs. Corrigan said. “I imagine Taco’s here for Maggie.”

“Right you are, Mrs. C. Maybe I can play with you girls another time? Anyway, I’m still a little sore from falling off your house.”

“That was forever ago,” Misha said.

“Maggie! Come out here!” Mrs. Corrigan hollered at the house. “Maggie!” The whole time she shouted, she kept her eyes on me like I might disappear if she blinked.

Finally Maggie showed up on the front porch. Even though it was almost noon, Maggie was still wearing her nightgown, and her hair was all twisted up into a rat’s nest, like she just pulled herself off her pillow.

“Hey there, Mags!” I waved to her.

“Hey,” she said. “What do you want?”

“Can I come in? I have some big news.”

“No,” Mrs. Corrigan said. “You can’t. I…Maggie’s father is in the middle of an important project. Why don’t you and Taco take a walk around the block? We’ll be having lunch soon. Then we’re going…we’re going to Dubuque to the mall. To see a movie, so don’t be long.”

“We’re going to Dubuque?” Molly asked.

“Yay!” Misha said.

“You have ten minutes,” Mrs. Corrigan said to Maggie.

“Okay,” Maggie said. She padded down the steps in her bare feet and began walking down the sidewalk, away from the house.

“Hey, wait up!” I said, but she kept walking.

“Ten minutes,” Mrs. Corrigan called after us.

When I caught up to Maggie, she said, “What are you doing here? Can’t you take a hint ever, Taco? You know my parents don’t want you around.”

“Sure. There’s some bad blood, but here’s what I figure: The more you know me, the more you love me. Am I right?”

Maggie looked up as she walked. She smiled a little. “That’s been my experience, yeah.”

“So maybe I should come around more so they get to know me too.”

The smile slid off Maggie’s perfect face. “No, that’s not a good idea. I’m grounded by the way. I’ve actually been grounded for a while, but my parents don’t know what time cheerleading practice ends, so I can come over.”

“Wait. What? Why are you grounded?” I asked.

“Duh, I stayed at your house until one in the morning, and Dad had to come to get me. And he had to wait while I put on clothes.”

“Aha,” I said. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I don’t want to add to your burden.”

“You’re my girlfriend. You should be able to share your stuff with me.”

“No, but—”

“And come on, my butt is healing! I’m just about fully operational at this juncture.”

“Listen, I just want you to be blissfully unaware, okay?” Maggie said.

“Why?” I asked.

“Because you have a dead mom and your dad’s gone and your brother drinks too much.”

“Oh,” I said. “Darius passed out with nachos last night.”

“And your mom, Taco,” Maggie said. “Your mom.”

This surprised me a little bit. Nobody—and I mean nobody—ever mentioned my mom. I thought everyone had forgotten about her other than me, Dad, and my drunk brother.

“My mom and dad would’ve killed you by now, you know?” Maggie said. “If they didn’t feel sorry for you, you’d be in jail.”

Leaves were falling all around us. Orange and yellow and red. The sun was out. It was so beautiful there in Maggie’s neighborhood. Today is the best day ever. I didn’t want to dwell on the past or on who wanted to kill me or put me in jail. I wanted to talk about the future. Our future!

“Not to change the subject,” I said, “but did you know you’re pregnant?”

Maggie stopped cold in her tracks. She glared up at me. “What the hell, Taco?”

“I…I’m just saying,” I said.

“Yeah, no shit, I know,” Maggie snapped.

“Were you trying to get pregnant?” I asked.

“Jesus. No!”

That surprised me a little, dingus. “Okay. Do your parents—”

“I know, but nobody else does. I drove all the way to Dubuque for that test. How do you know?”

“Darius told me.”

“What? Darius?”

“Yeah! I listed your symptoms because I thought you were possessed by a ghost, but he said you were pregnant. I did some independent research, which concurred with his assessment.”

Maggie’s face fell. “I have to do something,” she said. “I’d better do something.”

“Well, I was thinking,” I said.

Maggie’s eyes opened wide like she was totally ready for any wisdom or solution I might have to offer her. “You were?”

“Yes. And I have a plan.”

Maggie exhaled hard. “Okay, good. Because I can’t handle this by myself.”

I grabbed her hands in my hands. “Listen. We’ve got this. We’ll get married. You can move into the suite, and we’ll raise our baby. This is great, right? Married! I want to make a family with you for sure.”

Maggie yanked her hands away from me. “Shit, Taco!”

“What?”

“Just shut up! You shut up!” Maggie’s head looked like it might totally explode.

“Shut up?” I asked. “Why?”

“Because! I don’t want to be…I want to be on the dance team in college!” she shouted.

“That’s cool. That’s great,” I said.

“Shit, man!” And then she took off running. I’ve already mentioned how amazingly fast she is, and with my unholy coccyx, there was no point in giving chase, so I just stood there and watched her tear down the street with that perfect running form that comes so naturally to her.

This probably shouldn’t be a great memory. She was trying to get away from me after all. But wow. She looked so determined and powerful, you know? Plus Maggie Corrigan is killer hot. So sweet-assed hot when she starts taking off like a gazelle like that.

The memory hurts too.

I do totally love her. It hurts when you’re a junkie.