Chapter Thirteen

Harvard

There was something vaguely horrifying about waking up in a bed that wasn’t your own. I didn’t realize it wasn’t my bed until I rolled over and found nothing where the rest of the queen-sized mattress should have been. I flailed but still landed on the floor with an undignified thunk, which made my head swim. The sheets fell on top of me, carrying a dark floral scent that sent a jolt of lust through my belly and straight down the length of my morning wood.

Holy fuck. I knew that scent.

Sami.

Why did these sheets smell like Sami?

My memory of last night blurred into blackness after I’d finished about half of the bottle of Jim Beam I’d found in Quinn’s office. It was unopened—looked like a Christmas present Quinn had never touched. Which made sense, since he took migraine medication that interacted badly with alcohol.

Had I finished the bottle by myself?

Yeah. Judging by the roiling in my stomach and drum line in my head, I had.

How long before he noticed it was gone? He was a former Navy SEAL trained in observation. Probably not long. But he wasn’t in his office today, so I had time to run to town and buy a replacement.

I wasn’t a drinker, but when I found the bottle in a desk drawer while “borrowing” some files from Quinn’s hard drive, I’d been pissed off, feeling sorry for myself, and more than a little guilty for breaking into the office.

I still felt guilty.

When I first joined HORNET, determined to turn over a new leaf, I’d promised myself I’d never invade any of my teammates’ privacy. I’d done a shit job of keeping that promise over the years. But when that little virus started eating away at my network, I had to know what was in my personnel files. Had to know just how shaky the ground was under me right now. Maybe running and starting over was the best option for me at this point.

The file told me nothing. No disciplinary marks stained the pages. No commendations, either.

It was all but blank. Useless.

Or was I the useless one? Was that why the file contained nothing but the whitewashed history I had fed them when I started with the team?

I’d made my entire career of hiding my own shit while finding out things that nobody wanted anyone to know. If someone had a secret, it nagged at me until I figured it out. No matter how many times I told myself to stop hacking, that this one time would be the last time, I never could. Fuck if I didn’t enjoy every second I spent cracking systems I wasn’t supposed to have access to.

And speaking of places I shouldn’t have access to…

I slowly sat up and looked around. This was definitely Sami’s dorm room. Her scent infused the place, but she wasn’t here, and, thank fuck, I was still dressed in my jeans and my Nerd? I prefer the term intellectual badass T-shirt. I also smelled like the inside of a bar after closing time, all booze and regret. A good indication I hadn’t done anything unforgivable last night, like acting on the fantasy of bending Sami over my desk and taking her there in the computer lab.

The lab that carried my name. Would they rename it after Sami once they’d finished training her and kicked me to the curb?

The thought left a bitter taste in my mouth as I stood. Or maybe that was the Jim Beam coming back up to say hi.

Oh. Yeah. Definitely the bourbon.

Good thing Sami had her own bathroom, because I wouldn’t have made it to the one the male trainees shared down the hall.

Once my stomach calmed, I cleaned up as best I could and found my glasses neatly folded on her dresser. She’d taken off my glasses so I didn’t break them. She’d taken off my boots and covered me with a blanket after I’d passed out. She’d taken care of me, which left me feeling warm and uncomfortable. I’d always had to take care of myself.

I made her bed, then stepped out into the hall. It was quiet. My guess: all the guys were just as hungover as I was.

I moved carefully, afraid to make any sudden moves and upset the tumultuous peace treaty with my stomach. In the common room, I found Jeremiah Wolfe and his roommate, Blaze Decker, stretched out on two of the couches. Blaze was soundly asleep, snoring. Wolfe was awake, watching one of those gross-out medical documentaries on the TV, but he looked about as good as I felt.

When he spotted me, he propped himself up on one arm and squinted. “What did you do to Sami last night?”

“Nothing.” Jesus, I hoped that was true.

“Then why were you in her room, and why’s she passed out in my bed?”

I didn’t think I could feel any more nauseated, but the thought of Sami in another man’s bed put a hard knot in my stomach. But at least Wolfe was out here. And, thank God, so was Blaze. The guy had a bad reputation for notching bedposts and breaking hearts. He was a cocky rule breaker, all Rebel Without a Cause. Exactly the kind of guy I’d hated in school. But he was also a damn good shot, almost as good with a rifle as Seth Harlan, HORNET’s sniper, which was the only reason I’d suggested him for the program when his application came across my desk.

Wolfe, on the other hand, was solid. Just an all-around good guy. He was protective of Sami—they all were, even Blaze—but still, his question got under my skin. “Nothing happened between us.”

He scowled like he didn’t appreciate my answer.

“I don’t know why she’s in your bed, and I don’t remember how I ended up in hers,” I added. “I was drunk.”

His scowl only deepened.

“For real. Nothing happened.”

“We can take him,” Blaze muttered and dropped his arm from his eyes. “Even with the room still spinning.”

My temper sparked. So far, my day had sucked ass, and I didn’t have the patience to deal with his shit. “Oh, fuck off, Blaze.”

“Hey,” Wolfe said mildly.

Blaze muttered something under his breath and rolled over, giving the room his tattooed back.

Wolfe returned his attention to me. “Whatever happened or didn’t, just be gentle with her. She’s…” He seemed to search for the right word. “Inexperienced.”

Inexperienced. The word hit me like a punch to the solar plexus, knocking the air from my lungs. As if I didn’t already feel dirty for the persistent fantasies about her, now I learn she’s a virgin. And from Wolfe, no less. How did he even know? “She told you that?”

“Not in so many words.”

“Nothing happened,” I said. “Last night, she helped me when I was too wasted to get my ass home. And nothing is going to happen. For all intents and purposes, she’s my student. That’s the end of it.”

I doubted they believed me. Hell, I didn’t believe me. As much as I told myself to keep my hands off Sami, I still found excuses to touch her every chance I got. It was like the hacking—a compulsion I couldn’t shake and was powerless to fight.

I wanted that woman.

But I had to get my desires in check, because it couldn’t happen. My career was hanging on by a thread, especially now, with this new threat to my network. If Quinn or Gabe had seen me stumbling out of Sami’s room, I could kiss my job goodbye. While, technically, there were no rules in place about fraternization with the trainees, it was an unspoken understanding between my teammates. Which was easy for them. Half of the guys were either married or in committed relationships now, and the ones who weren’t were all at least ten years older than the trainees. They saw Sami and the others as kids.

Same as they saw me.

But it didn’t matter that the trainees were my peers or that Sami was only five years younger than me. I had to stay away from her. Had to keep my distance so I wouldn’t be tempted.

I winced as I stepped out into the bright afternoon sunshine. The calendar said early October, but someone forgot to tell Wyoming that. The sun was just as brutal today as at the height of summer, and I suddenly got why Jesse was never without his cowboy hat.

Nobody was around. Glad for it, I hauled ass to the computer lab. My laptop lay right where I’d left it, and I dropped into my chair behind it. Before I could go home and continue sleeping off my epic hangover, I had to fix this.

I opened the laptop—and froze at the scuff of a footfall behind me.

“I know what happened,” Sami said. “There was a worm eating the network.”

I squeezed my eyes shut and suppressed the groan that wanted to rumble up from my chest. I shouldn’t have given in to self-pity and gotten drunk last night. I should’ve kept working to fix this problem until it was solved.

She stepped into the lab and closed the door behind her. “Harvard, I—” She hesitated and seemed to search for something to say. “I came back after I made you leave and wrote several patches. I think I mitigated most of the damage.”

I wanted to touch her. To pull her into my arms and apologize for the jackass that was drunk Harvard. I didn’t. I turned back to my computer. “Thank you, but I still have to figure out who’s behind this attack.”

After a beat, she pulled up a chair and sat down to watch. “Do you think we’re compromised? What if Defion got in?”

My headache roared back. Defion. The mercenary team that had been a thorn in HORNET’s side since they killed Danny Giancarelli during a hostage situation in Martinique. If they had gotten in, they’d know our location. They’d know about the training program and have access to every dossier I’d ever vetted. That meant all the trainees, all the guys on my team, and their families.

Fuck, she was right. This could be Defion. “We’ll run a complete security check after this.”

I worked in silence, speaking only when Sami asked a question. With every passing minute, I felt worse. Maybe it was the hangover, but more likely it was the guilt eating me alive from the inside out. I’ve made some bad decisions in my life, but getting drunk instead of staying on top of this was up there. I’d endangered my team and, even worse, their children. All because I was feeling sorry for myself.

Jesus, I was an asshole.

After I fixed the worm, Sami got up and left without a word. That was it—the end of something potentially beautiful. Yeah, I couldn’t act on my feelings for her now, but someday…we might’ve had a shot.

Not anymore.

She’d seen me at my worst. Why would she want anything to do with that mopey, drunk asshole?

Silently cursing myself, I started security checks and jumped when Sami reappeared beside me.

She set a bottle of water and a Snickers bar on my desk. “You look like hell. Take a break.”

I picked up the water and left the candy for later, since I still wasn’t sure if my stomach would accept food. Twisting off the cap, I sat back in my seat and studied her. “I thought you weren’t coming back.”

“Why?”

“Because I made an ass of myself last night.”

“No, you didn’t.” She shook her head, making the blond tips of her hair sweep back and forth over her shoulder. I loved her hair. Shaved short on one side, long on the other, black fading into pale blond at the ends. It gave a “fuck society” vibe without being obnoxious. It was 100 percent Sami, and I was glad Quinn hadn’t made her change it, like he had her lip ring. I get why he’d nixed her piercing—it was a safety issue during training—but man, I missed that thing. I still caught myself fantasizing about sucking that ring into my mouth. And wondering what other body parts she had pierced that I couldn’t see.

Sami took her own snacks, a Diet Pepsi and bag of Skittles, over to her own desk. She plopped down in her Iron Throne and swiveled toward her computers. “Besides, this is our network. We’re in this together.”

And that brought my runaway libido to a screeching halt. I winced and took a sip of my water to hide my reaction. She shouldn’t be in this at all. I should’ve fixed it last night.

Well, training opportunity.

“Approach like an outsider hacker,” I said, all business. “Come at me hard. We need to make damn sure the worm didn’t leave any vulnerabilities behind.”

“I’m on it.” With that, she slid on her noise-canceling headphones and focused on her screen. I was very familiar with that particular tactic. Used it all the time to shut people out.

Fine. If she wanted to play it that way, it was nothing less than I deserved. I finished my water and tossed the bottle toward the recycling bin on the other side of the room. It bounced off the rim. As always.

Sighing, I put on my headphones and got back to work.