Chapter Fourteen

After the night in the arts and crafts cabin, Perry and I did our best to avoid one another. All my girls picked up on it, and, of course, the rumors about us spread like wildfire from there. The campers assumed we must have had some sort of romantic falling out, and we became the infamous counselor couple that everyone loved to gossip about. Jordana told me we were notorious and they’d even taken to referring to us as “Gerry,” a combination of Gigi and Perry. Parents’ Weekend was just around the corner, and although it would mean a ton of work for me, I was looking forward to anything that might take the campers’ attention off.

The night before Parents’ Weekend, there was no planned evening activity so the campers could finish cleaning up the bunks. After dinner, the girls did a sweep of the grounds, and then I went to each of the Cedar cabins for inspections. When I got back to Bunk Fourteen, Jordana was in the center of the room rattling off orders like a drill sergeant, so I went to my area to straighten up my cubbies. I was refolding clothes when Perry knocked on the open door of the bunk. The girls shrieked at his mere presence.

“Good evening, ladies,” he said in his smooth British accent. The girls were completely awestruck. “Might I have a word with Gigi?” he asked, looking around.

“I’m here,” I said, standing up from underneath a pile of clothes.

He motioned his head toward the front door. “Outside?”

I followed him to the porch where we stood in uncomfortable silence until he finally spoke. “You have something stuck to your person,” he said, pointing to my shorts.

I looked down and saw a pair of my skimpier underwear clinging to me. “Static,” I said, balling them up and shoving them into my pocket. “So, what do you want?”

He was fidgeting and pacing like he needed to get something off his chest. It was the first time I’d ever seen him look nervous. He was always so self-assured, so confident. I was determined not to be the one to speak next. As he opened his mouth to say something, I heard my name being called from behind us.

“Who’s that?” Perry asked.

I squinted and made out the faint outline of a woman walking toward us. It wasn’t until she was closer that I saw the glow of her unmistakable Chanel-red lips in the moonlight.

“That is my mother,” I said, shaking my head.

“Your mother?” he said, surprised.

“What’d you think, I was raised by wolves?”

He held up his hands. “You said it, not me.”

I rushed down the stairs to meet her. Perry followed closely behind. “Mom, what are you doing here?”

“Is that how you greet me? It’s Parents’ Weekend, isn’t it?” She leaned in for a hug.

“For the campers. Even when I actually was a camper, you hated coming up here. Plus, it doesn’t start ‘til tomorrow morning.”

The whole time I was speaking, her eyes were locked on Perry. I could tell she was trying to work out what kind of a conversation she’d just interrupted.

“And you are?” she asked, extending a well-manicured hand toward him.

“I’m Perry Gillman. I work with Georgica.”

“What a lovely accent. What part of England are you from?”

She was really laying it on thick. Perry caught me mid-eye roll but continued to be his usual charming self.

“I have a flat in Kensington now, but I grew up in Oxshott. It’s a smaller village in Surrey,” he said.

My mother looked pleased with his pedigree. “I know it well—some beautiful homes there. And where did you attend University?”

“Mom, what’s with the inquisition? I’m sure Perry has things he has to do.”

“It’s fine. I went to Cambridge and am now working on my DPhil in music composition at Oxford.”

“DPhil?”

“A Doctor of Philosophy degree. What you call a PhD.”

She was outwardly impressed. “You know, Gigi was accepted to several Ivy League law schools.”

I chimed in before she could rattle off the rest of my resume. “Yes, and now Gigi is a summer camp counselor. I’m sure Perry finds this all very fascinating, but it’s late, and I have to finish getting the girls ready for tomorrow and then sit OD.”

“Yes, excuse me, Mrs. Goldstein, but I need to get back to my post as well,” Perry said politely.

“Well, he certainly was charming,” my mother said after he was out of earshot.

“I hadn’t noticed,” I muttered under my breath. “Mom, what are you really doing here? Where’s Dad?”

“Your father stayed in the city this weekend, and I felt like getting away for a bit,” she answered.

“So you decided to take a three-hour drive to the middle of nowhere?”

“Not to the ‘middle of nowhere.’ To see you. I thought it might be nice to visit my only child. I don’t know why you find this so shocking?”

She looked genuinely hurt by my less-than-warm reception. I softened my approach. “I’m sorry. It’s nice to see you, only I’m working tonight. Are you staying in town? Can you come back tomorrow for a few hours?”

“I’m staying at the Stanton Inn. I took a room through the weekend. I have a massage booked for the morning.”

“The campers are performing a few scenes from the summer musical at the amphitheater, but I should be finished around two.”

She smiled. “Let me guess, Fiddler on the Roof?”

“You’d think Gordy would pay for the rights to some other show by now, but I’m doing my best to help raise the bar. I designed and made all the costumes.”

“That’s nice,” she said dismissively. “Walk me out?”

I walked my mother back to her car and told her I’d make some time for us to visit the next afternoon. That seemed to mollify her, and she left to go back to the inn for the night.

I went back to Cedar to sit OD. It was going to be a long, exhausting weekend for the counselors, so I let them have the night off to blow off some steam at The Canteen. After I lit the fire, I settled down at the picnic table and took out the costumes I was putting last-minute touches on. I pulled the lantern close to me and started attaching the buttons to the fiddler’s suit, which had turned out way better than I’d ever expected. It was a fantastic midnight blue I’d chosen so the fiddler would almost blend into the sky—like he was a true fixture of the town and Tevye’s life.

The material had some sheen to it that really glistened under the stage lights. Perry’d worn it a few times during rehearsals and it was hard to take your eyes off him. With the exception of the wedding gown, it had taken me almost three times as long to make it as any of the other costumes. When I finished securing the last of the buttons, I slid my arms into the jacket to try it on. I stood up to model it and pulled the collar up to my face and breathed in. It smelled like Perry.

“Looks good on you.” A voice said from behind me. I turned around to find Perry standing there. I suddenly felt embarrassed, not knowing how long he’d been watching me.

“It looks better on you,” I said, slipping it off and handing it to him. “Sorry about the interruption earlier. I had no idea in a million years my mother would show up here.”

“Yeah, that was pretty obvious, Princess.”

“So we’re back to Princess? You called me Georgica in front of my mother.”

“I like your proper name,” he said.

“I wouldn’t have guessed. You hardly ever use it.”

“That’s because I like messing with you more.”

“Is that what you were doing that night in the arts and crafts cabin? Messing with me?”

He sighed. “No, I wasn’t trying to mess with you. That’s why I came by to talk to you earlier. I want to explain.”

He motioned for me to take a seat, and I reluctantly did.

“Remember that night when we were eating those ice cream things outside The Canteen and you said nobody my age would come here summer after summer unless they were trying to escape something?” he asked.

I nodded, remembering how he’d reacted after I made that statement.

He rubbed the soft stubble on his face and brushed his fingers across his lips. “You weren’t wrong,” he said.

“You’re admitting I was right about something? Well, that’s a first.”

“Are you going to let me talk or not?”

“Sorry, Mr. Gillman, you have the floor,” I said, motioning for him to take a seat.

He sat down across from me at the picnic table and moved the lantern between us. “My first summer working here, I fell for one of the other counselors. She was American and a real ballbuster. Just so completely different from the girls back home. I swear, I think her parents forced her to work at Chinooka just to get her out of their hair for a few months.”

I immediately felt self-conscious, knowing this was the very same impression he’d had of me when we first met.

He continued, “I was attracted to her instantly. Most of the male counselors were. She was beautiful, but it was more than that. Something about being around her made you feel special.”

He didn’t have to explain. I used to feel that way about Joshua. Being in his presence had made me feel like everyone else in the room must think I was someone exceptional because he’d chosen to be with me.

Perry fidgeted with the buttons closest to his collar and slowly started undoing them. “She dated like three other guys before she gave me the time of day, and I think it was so I’d want her more,” he said. “It worked. I was completely smitten. Then, once we started dating, we were inseparable. I slacked on all my duties, and we sneaked away to be together as much as we could.”

“So no Gordy Award that summer?” I asked, playfully kicking his leg under the table.

He pursed his lips. “Gigi, please. Let me finish.”

I could see his whole demeanor change. He pulled his legs together and clasped his hands in his lap. His lower chin was now trembling and his breathing slowed as the memory washed over him. I promised not to say another word.

“At the end of the summer, I convinced her to travel across the US with me to do one of those big road trips you see all the time in the movies. A drive-your-Chevrolet-across-the-USA type adventure. At first, it was great. We stopped at all these bed and breakfasts up and down the California coast. But then she got restless or bored, with me or with the trip. I don’t really know.”

He stood up from the picnic table and began pacing. He kept his head down and eyes averted. “A couple weeks into the trip we were in a small town in Arizona. One night we both had way too much to drink with some locals, and she started flirting pretty heavily with the bartender. It wasn’t the first time she’d flirted with other men to get a rise out of me. I asked her to go back to the hotel, but she wouldn’t. I tossed her the car keys, called a cab for myself, and left.

He sat down next to me and put his head between his hands. He started talking again, his voice thick like he was holding back tears. He swallowed them down and continued. “In my stupid inebriated judgment, I thought she’d call her own cab or sober up enough to drive herself to the hotel. I’d seen her do it dozens of times after throwing a few back a few at Rosie’s.”

Tears streamed down Perry’s face. He didn’t bother wiping them away. “On her way home, she hit a flatbed truck and the car flipped. She died instantly or so I was told by the emergency room doctor. And it’s all my fault. I left her with the keys. I handed her the loaded gun.”

He was sobbing now, his shoulders shaking with emotion. I instinctively knew this was the first time he had shared this story with anyone.

I took his hands into my own. “Perry, you couldn’t have known that would happen.”

He wiped his face with the back of his hand and took a few breaths to calm down. “I waited for her parents to come and collect her body and then flew home to try to return to my life. Only you can’t ever really go back after something like that. You just keep reliving the minutes it took for you to do something you wish more than anything you could take back. Her parents didn’t want me in New York at the funeral. I never got to say goodbye. I never got a chance to tell them I’m sorry.”

It all made sense. His hostility toward me was because I reminded him of her. I’d shown up at Chinooka and stirred up all the emotions he’d been suppressing for so long. I pulled him to my chest, where he continued to let his grief pour out. I stroked his cheek, and he reached up and grabbed my hand, grasping it firmly in his own. We stayed like that until we could hear the far-away voices of the counselors starting to return from The Canteen.

Without saying a word he stood up and led me back to his cabin, where we made love like two people no longer bound by the weight of our offenses. Free from the secrets we’d been trying so desperately to keep buried, we were released from the past. Every one of my encounters since Joshua had been about trying to erase the feeling of his touch and my memories. I’d thrown myself at dozens of men, hoping they’d help me escape my feelings. Finally, I was at ease with a man who made me forget them.

The next morning, I tried to sneak back into the bunk unnoticed, but the girls were up bright and early getting ready for Parents’ Weekend. Tara was the first person to confront me as I walked in.

“Where’ve you been?” she asked.

Jordana shot me a puzzled look.

“I did a final sweep of the grounds, and they look great,” I announced as loudly as I could.

Tara looked me up and down. “How come you’re wearing the same clothes from last night?”

“I slept in them. I was exhausted when I came in from OD.”

Her expression made no secret of the fact she didn’t believe me. Madison and some of the other girls were whispering over by their cubbies. I couldn’t make out exactly what they were saying, but I heard them say “Gerry” a couple times.

“So I’m going to take a shower before breakfast, and I’ll meet you girls over in the dining hall. Jordana, think you can do roll call for me?”

Perry was waiting for me outside the dining hall. He took my hand and held it as we walked inside. Gordy caught my eye and smiled with approval.

As soon as I sat down, the questions started flying like I was in front of a firing squad. How long have you been together? When did it start? Is he a good kisser? I looked over to Perry for some support, but he was holding a mini press junket of his own. I crossed the room to get coffee, and Jordana followed me up to the machine.

“Okay, Gigi, spill,” she whispered.

“There isn’t much to spill.”

“You didn’t sleep in the bunk last night. I covered for you the best I could. I even put a pillow under the blanket so it would look like you were there if any of the girls got up to use the bathroom. Now you walk in holding hands with your sworn mortal enemy? Spill.”

I took a deep breath. “Can you hand me a sugar packet?”

“Gigi!” she shrieked. Some campers turned to look at us.

“Okay, okay. I spent the night with Perry, and we are certainly not mortal enemies.”

“Well, that’s obvious,” she said, taking her coffee back to the table.

I followed her and looked over at Perry. He glanced up and our eyes met. He winked at me, and I blushed, thinking back to earlier and how I’d woken in his bed to the sounds of him serenading me to Gershwin’s ‘Rhapsody in Blue.’ He’d played in a complete trance, his fingers dancing over the strings of the violin. When he finished, I’d applauded like I’d been watching him perform at one of the greatest concert halls in the world.

“Now, if only I’d written it,” he’d said, putting his violin back in its case.

“Who cares who wrote it when you can play it like that?” I responded.

“It’s our song, you know,” he said, climbing back into bed with me.

“I guess it is now,” I agreed, snuggling close to him.

I’d closed my eyes and fallen back asleep in his arms. Several hours later, Perry had woken me to tell me it was going to be light soon. He’d led me through the back path around the lake that my campers had used that first night to try sneaking into his division.

After breakfast, the visitors started to trickle in. I took my post at the camp’s entrance gate, greeting the families and directing them to their children’s divisions. I watched as bags of bagels and coolers full of sandwiches and sodas went by. At least a dozen pizza pies were being carried in, not to mention trays of designer coffee and boxes of doughnuts. You would’ve thought these parents were visiting their children at Attica rather than summer camp.

At noon, I went to the amphitheater, where the kids were getting ready to present a few scenes from Fiddler on the Roof for their families. Perry was the only character wearing his actual costume, so there wasn’t much for me to do. I grabbed a seat on the side of the stage, hidden from view, and watched as he took his place on top of Tevye’s house for the beginning of Act One. Jackie and Davis stepped to the front of the stage and explained the cast was going to perform a sampling of songs from the show, and all the parents were invited to come back to Chinooka in a few weeks to see the finished production. Then, Davis cued Perry, who started playing the opening notes. When the rest of the orchestra of campers and local musicians joined him, his superior talent was that much more apparent.

I looked out into the audience, scanning the different faces, and saw my mother sitting in the last row of the theater, her Burberry coat spread out like a blanket on the log bench. After the final number, she stood up along with the rest of the audience to give the kids their ovation.

When the show was finished, I went into the audience to greet her. She had stains down her cheeks where her mascara had run from crying. I motioned for her to wipe her eyes, and she took out a handkerchief and hand mirror.

“I don’t know what came over me,” she said, blotting away the dark streaks. “What talented kids. And your friend—the one with the violin—he’s remarkable,” she said.

“Perry. Yeah, he’s very talented,” I said.

“That’s an understatement. You designed his costume?”

I nodded. “I’ve finished most of them, but I’m still working on the wedding gown for the end of Act One.”

“Oh, I almost forgot,” she said, reaching into her tote. She handed me a stack of newspapers and magazines.

When I was a camper, instead of bringing junk food on Parents’ Weekend, she would bring the Fashion & Style section from every single edition of the Sunday New York Times that had been delivered while I was away. Sometimes she included the newest issues of Harper’s Bazaar or Vogue. When all the families had gone, Alicia and I would lie on my bottom bunk, devouring them along with all the snacks Mrs. Scheinman brought up.

“I can’t believe you remembered these, Mom. I can show the costumes to you if you have any interest, or we can find a quiet place to catch up—maybe one of the gazebos?”

Her face softened. “I would love to see the costumes,” she said.

The wedding dress was hanging over a form in the back of the arts and crafts cabin. I’d just recently finished draping the bodice with a tea-colored French Chantilly lace. I’d found the bolt of fabric years ago at an outdoor market in Paris and had been holding onto it for just the right project. As soon as I completed the sketch of the dress, I’d known this was it. Three-quarters of the way completed, it was finally starting to resemble the dress from my great-grandmother’s picture, with a bit of a modern twist. I pulled off the sheet covering the form, and my mother walked a full circle around the dress, looking at it from every angle.

“It looks like my Grandma Ruby’s—”

“Wedding gown,” I said, finishing her sentence. “I used the picture on your dresser as inspiration.”

“It’s absolutely stunning,” she said.

I had to admit that it was one of the best pieces I’d ever made.

“The girl who plays Tzeidel will look beautiful in it,” I said.

My mother put on her glasses and lifted the lace from the gown, leaning in to examine it more closely. “You’d look beautiful in it.”

“Me? No, it’s cut too straight. It’s not forgiving at all. It’s meant for someone with your body type or Alicia’s, not mine,” I said.

She sat down at my sewing table and flipped through my sketchbooks. The top book had the sketches of the costumes for the show. The rest were filled with sketches of wedding gowns inspired by the one I’d done for the show. As my mother closed the last page, Madison came running into the cabin looking for me.

“Oh, good, Gigi, there you are, I’ve been looking everywhere,” she said breathlessly.

“Mom, this is one of my campers, Madison Gertstein,” I said, introducing them.

Madison smiled at my mother, who couldn’t take her eyes off of the young girl. From the look on my mother’s face, I was certain she was amazed by the likeness between Madison and me at that age. Chubby with unkempt hair she’d tried to tame into a braid, her clothes just a little too tight and not quite on trend.

“Well, you found me. What’s going on?” I asked. Madison motioned for me to come closer to her, concerned someone might overhear us. I lowered my voice. “Maddy, I don’t think anyone’s eavesdropping.”

“Alex wants me to meet his parents,” she whispered.

“That’s great. What’s the problem?” I asked.

She chewed on her nails. “What if they don’t like me?”

I looked over at my mother, who was pretending not to listen but could no doubt hear us. “Not possible,” I said, putting my arm around Madison.

“You’re just saying that because you have to.”

“I have to do a lot of things as head counselor, but trying to convince you that you deserve the attention of some guy isn’t one of them,” I said.

“It would be so much easier if I looked like Candice or like you.”

“It’s you he’s liked from day one. Not Candice. You.”

She still looked unconvinced, but she gave me a hug before running out to go find Alex and his family.

“I had no idea you were so good with kids,” my mother said.

I picked up the sheet off the floor and arranged it back over the dress form. “I just told her what I would have wanted to hear at her age,” I said, a bit more harshly than I intended.

“She looks a lot like you did at thirteen.”

“I know. That poor girl, right?”

“I was just thinking that she was lovely.”

I narrowed my eyes. “Mom, what are you really doing here?”

“It’s a beautiful day. Why don’t we take out one of those rowboats they have at the lake?” she suggested.

It was obvious she didn’t want to talk about why she’d come to visit, so I decided not to push her. I followed her down to the lake while she chirped away about the Hamptons’ July Fourth party, Joshua and Alicia’s wedding, and her most recent trip to Martha’s Vineyard. When we reached the dock, we put on life jackets but had to wait a few minutes for a rowboat to be returned. When one was available, a member of the waterfront staff helped us into it and pushed us off. My mother grabbed a set of oars and we rowed out to the middle of the lake.

“I love this. I’m going to ask your father to get us one for the Hamptons,” she said.

“A rowboat?”

“Can’t you just picture the two of us enjoying lazy afternoons out on Georgica Pond?”

Unfortunately, after that night my father had shown up with his paralegal, the only person I could picture him enjoying Georgica Pond with was Samara. “Dad’s staying in the city this weekend?” I asked.

“He had a lot of work to catch up on,” she answered. “You know, I had the most wonderful massage at the hotel this morning. I can’t remember when I’ve felt so relaxed.”

She was obviously trying to steer away from the subject of my father. The unspoken tension between us was killing me. We were both dancing around the one topic neither of us wanted to confront. I bit the bullet and spat out, “Is he staying in the city alone?”

My mother dropped the oars out of her hands, and they fell into the lake.

“Damn it,” she cried.

“It’s okay. I’ll flag down one of the lifeguards,” I said, turning around to see if any were doing their usual patrol of the lake on Jet Skis. She started laughing hysterically. In my entire life, I’d never seen her come undone like that. “What’s so funny?” I asked, turning back around to face her.

“I’ve been avoiding this conversation for over twenty years, and now there’s no getting away from it. Literally.”

“We don’t have to talk about this,” I said.

She took my hands into her own. “Oh, yes, we do.”

One of the lake lifeguards came by on a Jet Ski and handed us back the oars, which had already floated pretty far from the boat. My mother thanked him, and then, after he sped off, she put them back in the water. She saw my puzzled look and said, “I might not be brave enough otherwise.” She pushed her oversized sunglasses onto her head so we were finally eye to eye. “No, Gigi, I’m sure he isn’t spending this weekend on his own. I’d venture to guess that one of his girlfriends will make sure of that.”

I tried not to let disappointment register on my face. “One of?”

“Yes, there’s more than one.”

“How long have you known about his…” I was going to say “cheating,” but in that moment, the word seemed too severe.

“Women my age usually say indiscretions,” she said, finishing my sentence. “Let’s see, I’ve known for about twenty years.”

Just then, the wake from the Jet Ski hit the rowboat. I put my arms to the side to steady it. I wasn’t sure if the revelation or wave was making me queasy. I closed my mouth and swallowed hard, hoping to suppress the feeling.

“I’m not sure I understand,” I said.

She moistened her lips, the remnants of her Chanel lipstick barely visible. “You know, your grandfather thought your father and I were out of our minds when we decided to name you Georgica, but we didn’t care. To us, the name represented a dream, a life we someday hoped to have.”

“I know all that,” I said.

“Did you know that while your father went to law school at night, I held two different jobs so we could afford having you plus his tuition? He watched you during the day and studied while I worked. There were days we only saw each other long enough for him to tell me what your nap schedule had been or what you’d eaten. We had nothing back then, but I was so in love with him I didn’t care,” she said.

This was all news to me. I’d always assumed their roles had been neatly defined and carved out from the very beginning. My father, uncompromisingly working toward his career, while my mother happily stayed home, dutifully cheering him on from the sidelines.

She continued, “We were a team back then. He graduated at the top of his class, clerked for a judge, and then became an associate. He climbed up the ladder pretty quickly after that, and we were living our supposed dream.”

I picked up on her sarcasm. “Supposed?”

“We had our fancy apartment in the city and our house on Georgica Pond, but funnily enough, I would have given anything to go back to our one-bedroom apartment in Astoria. I hadn’t realized how much I gave up in helping him pursue his dreams. The resentment came later. Without even realizing it, I pushed him away. The awful truth is I wasn’t all that surprised the first time I saw your father in a dark corner whispering with a young, attractive associate at the firm’s Christmas party.”

My head was swimming from her confessions. “I don’t understand. Then why did you stay with him all these years?”

A smile crept across her face. “Your father can be very persuasive, as you know. It’s why they pay him the big bucks.”

“Mom…”

She suddenly looked very serious. “I stay because, after thirty-five years of marriage, I don’t know how to be anything other than his wife. I stayed because I wasn’t a noun. And mostly, I stay because, despite all his flaws, or maybe even because of all his flaws, I love him,” she said, locking eyes with me.

A warm rush came over my body. It all made sense. Her constant badgering for me to pursue a career she thought would provide me with an independence and fulfillment she hadn’t found.

“So then, this is an arrangement the two of you have?” I imagined her and my father negotiating the terms over our kitchen table.

“I’ve made my life work, Gigi. I’m not unhappy. He fulfilled his end of our agreement and has given me everything I’ve ever asked for. I can’t blame him for the fact that it wasn’t quite enough. He doesn’t flaunt anything in my face. Our dynamic isn’t one I would choose for you, but when you’re in love with somebody, you do and accept things you’re are ashamed to admit to yourself, let alone to anyone else.”

My mind drifted back to that day she and I had lunch—when she pleaded with me to demand more from my relationships. Now, having heard her confession, I was ashamed to let her know just how alike she and I were.

I took a deep breath and said, “Mom, I carried on a relationship with Joshua while Alicia was doing that training program in London.” The words spilled out in a stream. “They weren’t together then, but still. I could never bring myself to tell her. She doesn’t know anything about it.”

My mother closed her eyes and shook her head, and I prepared myself for the scolding I knew I deserved. “God, you must hate me,” she said and I was certain I’d misheard her. “All those times I went on and on about how lucky Alicia was to have found a guy like him,” she continued. “So this summer, being here, it’s about more than just you being fired from your job then.” I noticed for the first time there was no disdain in her voice when she said job. Her eyes softened. “Is it over now?”

I stared down into the water. The small waves from the Jet Ski had subsided and the lake was still. “He’s not a bad guy. He never meant to hurt me. I don’t think he had any idea how long I’d been in love with him.”

“They never do,” she said, her voice breaking.

I looked up and at my mother’s face. Her skin was as luminescent as a teenager’s. Her big, dark eyes had only the smallest suggestion of crow’s-feet around them. Years of wearing big hats and even bigger sunglasses had preserved her youthful appearance. Her glossy hair, not pulled back into its usual chignon, framed her face in such a way that I could almost imagine that twenty-something girl confidently making her way in the world. I wished I could have known her, although I was grateful to have just discovered she ever existed at all.

I took her hands in mine. “Should we try to get the oars back, or do you want to sit here for a bit longer?”

“Let’s float a little bit longer,” she answered.