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Jordan was surprised when Kate told him Alex and Sylvie were coming over again. Much as he’d love to cut loose and chill out with friends, his weekends at home were mostly filled with work.
He could spare a few hours, and then catch up after dinner.
Kate was happy with the company. She planned to tackle a mountain of jam and pickle making, and Sylvie would love to help.
Alex flashed a cheeky grin when they arrived and waved a brightly coloured video-game box. “Lock and load. We’ve got a heavy day, shooting aliens.” He followed Jordan upstairs to his study, leaving Kate and Sylvie to chatter in the kitchen.
“I have to pause for a con-call at eleven, but it’s only for an hour,” Jordan said.
Alex raised his eyebrows, his surprise clear. “I thought you were having a long weekend.”
“We are, but I have some work to cover.”
“No rest for the wicked, huh?”
While Alex installed the game on the PC, Jordan went downstairs to fix some coffee. He found Sylvie sitting on the kitchen floor, playing with Poppy, while Kate extracted a tray of cookies from the oven.
“Yum,” said Jordan. “Chocolate chip. My favourite.” He tried to snag one from the cooling tray and received a tap on the back of his hand.
“Wait. You can take some on a plate for the two of you,” Kate said.
He leaned against the fridge while the coffee brewed, and took the opportunity to covertly look at Sylvie. She had shadows under her eyes, as though she wasn’t sleeping well, and her smile seemed brittle. Jordan crouched next to her and tickled Pops.
“Everything okay? You aren’t worried about the memorial service, are you?”
She glanced up and twisted her mouth. “I’ll be there. I mean, we’ll be there.” She looked away. “Will you let me have the details when you know them?”
Jordan nodded, and then spoke softly to her. “There’s no pressure. You can still change your mind.” He paused, lost in his memories for a moment. “Rico was my friend too, and it’s okay for you to feel sad about him. Alex will understand.”
Her dark eyes looked huge in her pale face. “I don’t want Alex to feel I love him any less. I loved Rico, but what we had... it was different.” She hesitated. “I’m scared of going back to the office.” This came out as a whisper.
She wasn’t the only one. Jordan had a recurring nightmare about the new building collapsing with him inside it, but he couldn’t think about that now. “I know.” He kept his voice as reassuring as he could. “I’m going to have to work there again, and I’ll be seeing it on a daily basis. It’s not gonna be easy.”
She nodded and gave him a tentative smile, then went back to playing with his daughter. The conversation was over.
Rico was the bravest man Jordan had ever known, but Sylvie’s courage was immense. It wouldn’t be easy for any of the survivors, but Jordan had to carry on. Everyone would be relying on him to take the lead, as usual. God. The responsibility exhausted him sometimes.
Jordan carried a tray of coffee and biscuits up to his study, to find a pensive-looking Alex gazing out of the window. Maybe today wasn’t a social call after all. “Raining again. Don’t you love the weather up here?” He placed the tray on a side table. “You’re supposed to look a little happier, for a guy on his honeymoon. You okay?”
“Yeah. I think so.” Alex paused. “I wondered if you could give me some advice?”
Jordan huffed a laugh. “Me? Sorry, but I find it amusing that the Rock God AJ is asking me for advice.”
“Funny. I’m serious. You’ve been happily married for... What? Five years?” Jordan nodded. “Syl and I have been together, as a couple, for seven months, and this is the longest relationship I’ve ever had.”
Talking about his feelings ranked high amongst Jordan’s list of hated activities. He wanted to stop Alex in his tracks and rewind the conversation, then push it in a different direction. Shame that wasn’t possible. He bought a few moments of thinking time by pouring coffee and biting into a cookie. “Kate is the longest relationship I’ve ever had, too; I was always too busy or moving around too much before her. So my experience is limited. What’s on your mind?”
Alex was hesitant. “I wonder if she thinks she made a mistake. You know—getting married. The band, and all that.” He shrugged, and then gazed out of the window some more.
“Why do you think that?”
There was a long pause. “She’s been... well... distant. I thought she was tired, and we’d be more normal when we got back home. But I don’t know. It’s as though she’s not telling me something.”
“Have you asked her?”
“Yeah. I thought we could talk about anything. Now, I’m not so sure.”
“A lot happened the past year. To both of you, but her life changed completely. The music biz is second nature to you. Maybe she’s finding the transition a little difficult? And we both know she’s worried about the memorial service.” Jordan paused, and then added gently. “She’s also worried you may feel hurt if she attends. Because of Rico.”
Alex looked up, astonishment clear in his eyes. “That’s crazy. I’ll always be grateful to Rico and you, for bringing her into my life. I’ve no reason to feel jealous of him. What gave her that idea?”
It was tempting to put Alex and Sylvie next to each other and knock their heads together, but Alex clearly needed to unload, and Jordan resigned himself to being supportive. “There’s something I’m gonna tell you in confidence. I know Kate doesn’t like it being common knowledge, but I think it might help.”
“Go on.”
This was something else Jordan didn’t like to talk about. “I pushed Kate into marrying me. We hadn’t known each other long, she was vulnerable, and I bullied her into getting married, though she didn’t want to.” He paused and rubbed at the ever-present ache in his temples. “I guess I was afraid she’d run out on me if we didn’t. And she did—run away, that is. We’d been married a week.”
Alex gaped. “Shit. So what happened? I mean, you fixed it, but how?”
“It took a while. The best part of a year. It was hard, but we started talking again. Really talking. And we fixed it. The rest, as they say, is history. What I didn’t realise then was that you can’t make Kate do something she doesn’t want. Underneath that soft exterior, she’s pure steel. She’s tougher than you think.”
Jordan paused and collected his thoughts. “You guys need to talk more. There you go. That’s the sole piece of advice I can offer. Works for me and Kate.”
When Alex first moved to the house next door, he was a mess. The difference in a year was staggering, and largely, because of Sylvie. It was clear to see how much they loved each other.
Alex nodded, took a slug of the coffee, and then flashed his usual grin. “Thanks, mate. Appreciate it.”
“Okay. We’ve got half an hour before my con-call. Wanna show me how this game works?”
****
Lara’s day flew by at work. It was a typical Monday, with the usual meetings and reports, but everything felt different. Nick’s parents were busy dropping hints about grandchildren all weekend, and Lara had watched Nick’s reaction. He smiled and nodded and said the usual things. Of course we want kids. Not yet, but one day.
Okay, so it was going to happen sooner than either of them planned, but that didn’t mean it was a bad thing. Tonight would be the perfect time to tell him. It was Nick’s regular squash night, which meant he’d be home by eight and starving. She’d grab a bottle of champagne to celebrate with, cook something extra nice for dinner, and they’d make a night of it.
Everything was fine, until she used the bathroom late afternoon and found a smear of blood in her knickers. Her heart lurched with a painful jolt. She gazed at the stain, scared to move. This couldn’t be a miscarriage. Not so soon. She’d barely wrapped her head around being pregnant.
She found an empty meeting room, where she could talk without being overheard, and called her GP surgery. The doctor could see her in a couple of hours. It was the earliest they could squeeze her in.
Lara packed up her things, explained she had a medical appointment, and hurried off. It didn’t matter that she’d be over an hour early; she’d rather wait there, in case she started bleeding badly. There wasn’t any more so far, but she was terrified.
By the time she sat in front of her doctor, she was a blubbering mess. Her GP was lovely. She mopped Lara’s tears, felt her stomach, examined the stain in her panties, and then despatched her to the local hospital, clutching a card for an emergency scan. Again she hung around and waited, drinking the water offered by the nursing staff. A full bladder made the scan image clearer.
The next half hour passed in a blur, but eventually she lay on the bed next to the equipment, with the operator pressing the ultrasound wand back and forth across her belly. It was a weird sensation. Was this how pastry felt when it was being rolled out? Then, the most miraculous thing happened.
The operator smiled. “I’ve found the heartbeat. Look at the screen. You can see it winking on and off, like a little flashing light.”
Lara stared at the grainy image. Sure enough, there was a little thing pulsing away—a blip, coming and going with a regular tempo. “That’s the heart?” Her voice was a whisper. “And it’s okay?”
“Everything looks fine.” The technician carried on with her routine.
Fine. Lara would call it something else. Incredible. And scary. That was a baby inside her. She saw it. And fell in love with it.
She didn’t take in much information over the rest of the appointment, other than the headlines. She was carrying a healthy foetus, approximately six weeks old. Her womb looked fine and healthy. A little bleeding was common enough to be almost normal in these very early stages. The advice was to go home and behave normally, report back to her doctor, and get registered for a midwife.
In the space of two days, Lara had learned she was pregnant, then thought she was having a miscarriage, and then discovered everything was normal. And she’d seen her baby. Well, it was only a blob, but with a heartbeat—a reassuringly steady heartbeat. Her baby.
She took a cab home and sat waiting for Nick. She had to share the wonderful news with him.