“Is your food good?”
“It’s delicious,” I say, poking around at the chicken on my plate.
My date, Craig, who has been nothing but sweet and attentive, stares at my dinner. “You’ve barely touched your meal. I can send it back and order you something different if you’d like.”
“I’m sorry,” I say, sitting my fork on the plate. “My mind is a little preoccupied, and that isn’t fair to you.”
It isn’t fair to me either, but all I’ve done since I left Edna’s apartment is think about Aiden.
Mr. Right? Mr. Right? I should’ve reminded Aiden that I’d once given him the chance to be Mr. Right, and he flat out-out rejected me. My heart still holds the scars from that night—something I had to learn to deal with in order to salvage our friendship. Things were rocky at first, but I refused to let my unrequited feelings ruin what we had. There are days I want to give in, offer myself to him once again in hopes that his feelings have evolved, until the vividly embarrassing moment flashes to the forefront of my mind.
It had been a cool fall night. I’d spent the evening at a frat house party with my sister, Aiden, and a few of our friends. We were drinking and having fun. My feelings for Aiden had been brewing for several months, and that night, as I watched him turn down girl after girl, I’d tried to come up with a way to tell him how I felt. Unfortunately, I waited too long, and the moment passed.
Aiden left with a few of his buddies, and Emily and I went back to our apartment. I lay in bed for hours, thinking about him—about us—and finally garnered enough courage. With a whole lot of hope, I popped out of bed, threw on the nearest coat, and trekked the three blocks to Aiden’s place.
He opened the door looking sleepy and disheveled, and maybe a little intoxicated, but I wasn’t going to let that stop me. I was nervous. More nervous than I could ever remember being, because for the first time in my life, I was about to put my heart and friendship on the line, and my only hope was that he felt the same way.
I hadn’t realized I’d been crying until I felt his thumb brush across my cheek. He pulled me into his apartment and even farther into his arms, and I knew that that was my moment.
I pushed onto my toes and kissed him. For one glorious moment, he’d kissed me back with warm, soft lips, a hand pressed to my lower back, holding me close, and then he’d jerked back. He shook his head in disbelief, blinked a few times, and rubbed his eyes before speaking. “That can’t happen again, not with you.”
Cue the tears.
I’d given it my best shot. I should’ve been proud. I wasn’t. I was humiliated and embarrassed and fearful of what I’d just done to our friendship. I refused to let him see me break down and ran out of there as fast as my legs would carry me.
To make matters worse, Aiden showed up at my apartment early the next morning, wanting to talk about what had happened the night before, but I’d refused to discuss it. It was easier to pretend that it never happened than relive the single worst night of my life.
He reluctantly agreed.
It took months and a hell of a lot of tears for our friendship to get back on track, and even then, things weren’t normal—that didn’t come for another few years. And now that we’re finally back to a good place, he wants to be Mr. Right?
I think not.
“Lizzie?”
“Sorry.” I swallow past the lump in my throat and reach for my fork. I’m done thinking about Aiden. “I’m okay. I promise.”
I plunge my fork into the bowl of homestyle green beans and take a bite. When my eyes roll back into my head, Craig laughs. Lorraine’s is a quaint diner in the neighboring town. I’ve heard of it, but this is my first time here.
And it won’t be my last.
Stabbing a chunk of chicken, I pop it into my mouth and moan.
“Good, isn’t it?”
I nod. “So good. I’d kill for the recipe for the sauce on this chicken.”
“Don’t commit homicide,” he says, laughing. “I can get you the recipe.”
I tilt my head to the side and swallow my bite. “How?”
“Well…” Craig leans back in his seat with a proud smile. “Because my parents own this place. My mother is Lorraine.”
“Are you serious?” I put my fork down and take a drink. “Craig, that’s awesome. How come you didn’t tell me sooner?”
“Most women get freaked out at the prospect of meeting my family on the first date.”
I must have a worried look because Craig holds up a hand. “Don’t worry, my parents promised to stay in the kitchen until we’re done. Unless, of course, you want to meet them.”
“Uh…” Do I? My eyes flit toward the back of the restaurant where the kitchen is located. A small, grey-haired couple is smiling at me from behind a counter.
I smile back, and the woman’s eyes widen. She waves, nudges the man beside her with her elbow, and before I know it, they’re walking toward us.
Oh, shit.
Craig follows my gaze across the room. “Oh, shit,” he murmurs, mimicking my thoughts. “I’m so sorry.”
“For what?”
“Just…” His eyes dance between me and the sweet-looking couple strutting our way. “Don’t judge me, okay?”
“Judge you? I don’t under—”
“You must be Lizzie.” I’m yanked from my seat into the arms of a woman who smells of grease and surprisingly enough, sugar. She pulls back but holds me at arm’s length. “Craig has told us so much about you.”
“He has?” I just met him last week on Mingle.
“Oh, yes, dear. And this is Craig’s dad, Teddy,” she says, nodding toward the man beside her.
“Hi?”
The man smiles and tips his hat at me.
“Mom, let Lizzie go.”
She swats Craig’s hand away when he reaches for me. “Hush now. You’ve had your moment, now it’s our turn. How do you feel about babies?” Lorraine asks.
“Babies?”
“Now you’ve gone and done it, Lorraine,” Teddy says. I look up into a pair of aged blue eyes that look so much like Craig’s. “You’ll have to forgive my wife, she’s excited because she’s about to be a grandma.”
“Wow. Congratulations.”
“So, you like babies?” she asks again.
“Who doesn’t?”
“Oh, Craig, you were right, she’s perfect.” Lorraine pulls me forward, smashing my face against her bosom. Not exactly how I pictured this going. With a grunt and possibly an elbow to the woman’s gut, I wiggle out of her arms.
“Right about what?” I straighten my top and look at Craig. “And why would you say I’m perfect? You don’t even know me.”
“Sweetheart, you don’t have to say that for our sake,” Lorraine says. “We might be old fashioned, but we understand that young folk these days have premarital relations.”
“Premarital what?” I sputter. “Craig and I haven’t—”
Craig’s dad slings an arm around my shoulders and pokes his son in the ribs. “Craig told us you two have been shacking up for a few weeks now. Nothing to be embarrassed about, darlin’.”
I narrow my eyes at Craig.
I’m sorry, he mouths.
“The way he talked about you, we just knew you’d be special and that you’d accept Karina into your life with open arms.”
“Who’s Karina?”
“Mom, don’t.” Craig shakes his head, but his mom has a one-track mind.
“I didn’t think your new girlfriend would want to meet Karina so soon—”
“Oh, I’m not his girlfriend.”
“—which is why I told her to stay in the back,” she continues, ignoring me. “But hell, if she’s ready, then so are we. Karina,” Lorraine yells across the restaurant. “The girlfriend wants to meet you.”
“I’m not his—”
My words are interrupted by a high-pitched squeal, and I take a step back when I see a pregnant woman running toward me with her arms wide open. Her belly bumps into me first followed by strong arms around my neck.
“Uh…” My arms dangle limply at my sides while I silently plead with Craig to do something. He jumps into action and pries the woman away from me.
“I’m sorry, I’m just a little emotional,” Karina says, rubbing her swollen belly. She looks lovingly at Craig and then back at me.
“It’s okay. You’re…wow, like a million months pregnant.”
Karina laughs and looks down at her belly. “Tell me about it. I haven’t seen my feet in three months.” She wiggles said feet and looks at me. “I just hope they’re still there.”
“They are.”
“Good.”
Lorraine wraps an arm around me and another around Karina and holds us close. “I love that you two get along. Family is so important, and this baby will need all the support he can get.”
“I take it you’re Craig’s sister?”
Karina’s eyes widen. She shakes her head. “Oh, no, sweetie, I’m his ex-wife.”
Okay, this is officially weird. It’s bad enough meeting the mom and dad on the first date, but the ex-wife? This is where I draw the line. I pull away from Lorraine and look at Craig.
“Mom, Dad, Karina…could you give us a second?” he asks, keeping his eyes on mine.
“You didn’t tell her?” Karina whispers. “Oh, Craig, please tell me you told her.”
“Tell me what?”
“I’m so sorry, Lizzie, I thought…we thought…” Lorraine’s words turn into a sympathetic frown.
Tossing my hands into the air, I sit down. “I’m lost.”
Karina grabs Craig’s hand and puts it on her belly. “The baby is Craig’s.”
My lips part. Words fly through my head, but nothing comes out.
Craig pulls away from Karina and sits in a chair beside me. He tries to take my hand in his, but I resist.
“Karina and I were married right out of high school,” he explains. “A year ago, we split up. A few months after that, we tried to reconcile, but we couldn’t make it work. It wasn’t until the divorce papers were signed that we found out Karina was pregnant.”
Sounds legit, and I can’t even be mad because Karina is so darn cute, and Craig’s about to be a daddy. “Why did you tell your parents we’ve been together for a few weeks? I just met him tonight,” I tell his parents.
Lorraine inhales and covers her mouth.
Craig sighs. “Karina started dating this guy named James, and all she does is talk about him and spend time with him. I was jealous and a little sad, so I told them I have a girlfriend.”
Karina inserts herself between Craig and me. “You’re jealous?”
“Hell yes, I’m jealous. I love you, Karina. You and that baby are mine. Always have been, always will be. I never should’ve signed those divorce papers.”
A collective gasp fills the room, and that’s when I notice everyone in the restaurant staring at us. Can’t say I blame them.
Karina throws herself at Craig. “I love you, too.”
“You do?”
She nods. The two ex-lovebirds kiss, and it’s the sweetest thing. This is what I want—minus the pregnant part or the divorce part. I want someone to look at me the way Karina and Craig look at each other.
“Marry me?” Craig asks, and of course, Karina says, “Yes!”
Lorraine claps, Teddy lets out a loud whoop, and I can’t help it, I start laughing. I’m laughing because I’m happy for this crazy couple and this family, and that baby and also maybe because Aiden was right.
God, I hate it when he’s right.
The more I think about my stupid love life, the more I laugh, only I’m no longer laughing, I’m sobbing.
I’m a sobbing, single mess.
Craig and Karina pull me into a hug. Awkward, I know, but right now, I really need a hug, and I can’t go to Aiden for one because the only thing worse than knowing he’s right is admitting it.
“She needs pie. Get her pie,” Lorraine tells Teddy.
“On it.”
A second later, Teddy slides an oversized slice of warm apple pie in front of me along with a fork and a glass of milk. “This should do the trick.”
“Thank you.” I sniff, wipe a tear, and take a bite. “This is delicious. And you two are going to make wonderful parents,” I say, waving my fork between Craig and Karina.
“Thank you.” Craig sits down and tugs Karina onto his lap. “I’m sorry about all of this.”
I shrug a shoulder. “Don’t be. Surprisingly enough, this has been one of the better dates I’ve been on.”
“That’s sad,” Karina says.
“Tell me about it. Do you guys mind if I have a moment to myself?” I ask Craig, his family, and all of the patrons who are still nosing their way into our business.
“Not at all.” Craig pats my back. Karina smiles, and Lorraine hangs back until her family is out of sight. She rests a hand on my shoulder. “You’ll find the right man.”
“Who needs a man when I have pie?”
“Amen, sister.”
Two hours later, I walk into my apartment building. I peek around the corner to make sure Aiden is nowhere to be seen and run for my door, shove my key into the lock, and slip inside. I press my back against the door and close my eyes.
I hate this. I hate the way tonight ended, and I hate fighting with Aiden. Worse, I hate that I couldn’t go over there like I wanted to do. Yes, I could’ve, but he was an asshole today, so he can come to me. Happy with that decision, I nod and push away from the door. After watering my one and only plant, I change into my pajamas, grab my laptop and blanket, and plop onto the couch.
It’s been a week since my last blog post, and I’m itching to get my fingers on the keyboard. I open my laptop, log in to the blog, and lose myself in the words.
The Boyfriend Blog
July 19, 2019
Another One Bites the Dust
Bad date number 9,330,821. Okay, not quite, but that’s what it feels like. Tonight was a total bust. I’d tell you all the sordid details, but you wouldn’t believe me even if I did. Let’s just say that on our first and last date, I met his parents, ex-wife, and unborn baby.
I’m going to let that sink in for a second…
I met his parents, pregnant ex-wife, and unborn child!
Who does that? Who brings their date to the same location as his parents and pregnant ex-wife? Don’t get me wrong, they’re all as sweet as pie, but no. Just no.
Afterward, I wanted nothing more than to head to my best friend’s house so he could feed me ice cream and tell me I’m pretty. But the insensitive jerk made me mad earlier when he told me that my date would end badly. And, yes, it did in fact end poorly, but I refuse to give him the satisfaction of knowing he’s right. So, I did what any respectable young woman would do; I ate an entire slice of apple pie. I didn’t need the calories because my jeans are already too tight, but I deserved it, damn it, and I can always buy new jeans!
And now I’m going to curl up on the couch with a cozy blanket and watch a sappy Hallmark movie to take my mind off of my inability to find a decent man.
Let’s get real for a minute. I knew that finding a boyfriend would be hard, but never in a million years did I think it would be this hard. If you’ve been following the blog, you know that I’ve been documenting my dating life for four years, and due to lack of, well, dates, I’ve started using dating apps.
And because I know you’re dying to know my opinion on said apps, I’ll tell you that Mingle has been my favorite so far. Hooked is a close second, and Love Potion Online is a hard no (unless all you’re looking for is sex, in which case, I would say give it a try).
But I’m not looking for just sex. I’m looking for someone who makes me laugh and gives me butterflies and doesn’t expect to get laid within the first hour of our date. Oh, and I’d prefer a man who isn’t about to become a baby daddy. I’ll gladly take a single father, but not one who’s ex-wife is still very pregnant.
I used to think there was someone out there like that just for me. Now, I’m not so sure.
I’m trying not to get discouraged, but it’s hard. It’s so hard. I haven’t had a date that’s turned into a second date in three months. I want a second date!
At this point, I’ll just take a good first date.
Okay, enough of my whining, I’m going to hop off here and salvage what’s left of my evening.
Happy dating!
XOXO,
Liz
COMMENTS
I’m new to your blog. It’s refreshing to know there’s someone out there struggling as much as I am in the dating world. Thank you for sharing. –Daniella
Girl, eat the pie. Dating sucks. –Suzanne
If your best friend feeds you and tells you you’re pretty, you should probably date him. –Tarryn
- I’m mad at him right now, which means I refuse to entertain that idea. —Liz
I had a guy bring his dad on a date once. Needless to say, I ended up connecting with the dad, and now I’m a stepmom to someone who’s a year older than me. Oops. *giggles* --Leslie
Go on a date with me. I’ll give you a first date, a second date, and if you’re lucky, forever. Send me a picture. I’d love to know what you look like. –Jordan
Have you tried Slap? –Christy
- Christy, I haven’t. Is that a new dating site? I’ll check into it. –Liz
Not new, but something you should consider if you like kink. –Christy
- Good to know. –Liz
I’m replying to the final comment when there’s a knock on my door. I set my laptop to the side and move to look through the peephole.
Damn.
It’s Aiden, looking a little tired and a lot impatient. I remain still in indecision until he arches a brow at the wood.
I fling the door open and cross my arms, the universal sign for a pissed off woman, BEWARE. “Did you come here to collect my laundry?”
“No, I came to talk to you.” Aiden offers me a smile. I return it with a glare, and he sighs. “I brought you a peace offering,” he says, holding out a carton of my favorite ice cream.
“I’m not hungry. I had apple pie at the end of my date.” He doesn’t need to know that while I was eating the pie, my date was in the back room planning a wedding with his ex-wife.
“Apple pie sounds good.”
“Delicious.”
“Can I come in?”
“Nope.”
“Is your date here?” He tries to look around me, but I lean over, blocking his view.
“That’s none of your business.”
Aiden’s jaw twitches, but he stands tall and looks at me. “I’m sorry about what I said to you earlier. It was mean and insensitive, and I don’t know why I said it.” He pauses. “That’s a lie, I do know why, but now isn’t the time to discuss it, you’re not ready. So, I’ll apologize again. I’m sorry.”
It’s impossible to stay mad at him when he gives me those big puppy dog eyes. “You really hurt my feelings.”
“I know. I’m sorry.”
“Does the reason you said it have anything to do with you thinking you could be Mr. Right?”
“I don’t think, I know. And it does.”
“You’re right, I’m not ready to talk about it. I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready to talk about it.”
“You will, and I’ll wait.”
I blow out a breath and open the door so he can come in. “You might be waiting for a long damn time.”
“I’m a patient man.” Aiden walks into my apartment and nods toward my laptop. “What’re you working on?”
Shit. I dart across the small room and slap my laptop shut before he has a chance to look at my screen. “Nothing.”
He lifts a brow, clearly not buying my blatant lie. “Please don’t tell me it’s another dating app. I wish you’d just—”
I poke him in the chest. “Don’t you dare say that I should give them up and go out with you.”
“Fine.” He holds up his hands. “But at least I know you’re thinking it.”
“I’m not thinking it.”
Aiden sinks to the couch and pulls me down beside him. Our legs are pressed together. The heat from his body radiates to mine, and his thigh is so hard. When did his thigh get so hard? Has he been working out?
“Lizzie?”
“Hmm?”
Aiden leans forward. The faint scent of his cologne surrounds me. My gosh, he smells good. Too good. I take a breath and turn my head. Bad decision because now our mouths are an inch apart. My eyes drop to his full lips. All I’d have to do is tilt my head a tiny bit and—
Aiden growls, and my eyes snap to his. The heated look in his eyes has me squeezing my thighs together. He brushes his thumb beneath my lower lip and holds it there for a beat, ratcheting up the anticipation within me so tight that I have to fist my hands in my lap to keep from reaching for him.
Oh, God, is he going to kiss me?
Do I want him to kiss me?
Will I kiss him back, or will I push him away?
I didn’t realize I’d been biting my lower lip until he uses his thumb to pop it out from between my teeth.
He lowers his head. Warm breath tickles my neck. “Stop looking at me like that.”
“Like what?”
“Like you want me to be Mr. Right.”
“That would be foolish because we both know you’re not. That’s not who you are,” I breathe, casting my eyes to the side.
“People change.”
I nod. “You’re right.”
He doesn’t reply until I look at him. “I’ve changed.”
Has he? I flip back over the last few months in my mind and then back more than a few months. The last woman I remember him going on a date with was that redhead he met while we were playing darts. Wait…that can’t be right. That was over a year ago, which means—
“Lizzie?”
I blink. Aiden brushes a strand of hair out of my face. His fingers linger on my skin, and this is it, he’s going to kiss me. I close my eyes, still trying to decide what I’m going to do while waiting for his sweet lips to touch mine.
“Can you hand me the remote?”
Those aren’t the words I’m expecting. My eyes fly open. Aiden is grinning. Bastard!
“You’re sitting on it,” he says, nodding to the other side of me.
I grab the remote—which I am sitting on—and throw it in his lap.
Aiden laughs and wraps an arm around my shoulders. “You’re so thinking about it.”
“I’m not thinking about it.”
“Yes, you are.”
“No, I’m not.”
“You’re either pondering the possibility of me being Mr. Right, or you’re thinking about me kissing you. For the record, I won’t kiss you until you ask me to.”
“I won’t ask.”
He grins. “Oh, you’ll ask.”
The memory of him rejecting me all those years ago pops into my head. I press a hand to my chest because the wounds his words caused are still raw and hurt more than I expected them to after all this time. That can’t happen again, not with you.
“Why are you doing this?” I ask softly.
Aiden’s smile fades. He looks at me for a long time, his eyes shining with emotion that isn’t all that hard to read and makes my heart squeeze painfully.
“Because you’re the one for me, Lizzie. I’ve known it for a while now, and I think I’m the one for you, too. I just need you to give me a chance to prove it to you.”