––––––––
I opened the door that separated the lobby from the long hallway leading to the stage. Parents and friends filled the cavernous room, some with flowers and teddy bears, others with balloons, and some with just proud smiles.
There was no one waiting for me, though. I hadn’t told Daddy about the talent show. Just that I had to stay after school to finish something up and that I would be home around six o’clock. Honestly, I hadn’t even thought that I would make it on to the stage. If it wasn’t for Cole, I wouldn’t have. Now, as I pushed through the bodies in the lobby, I wished that I would have told my dad. I wished that someone was waiting for me, too.
“Nice job.”
Some man I didn’t know clapped me on the back. I gave him an awkward smile and kept walking.
“You have an excellent voice, dear.” This came from Mrs. Jonas, the assistant principal. She was waiting for her daughter, Alexa, who had done a jazz dance routine.
“Thanks,” I replied.
“You sounded like an angel,” a tall, thin woman with glasses said. She clasped her hands in front of her as she said it, her face serene as if I had really just stepped down from heaven.
“Thank you,” I replied.
“You sounded great, Bella!” Mrs. Smalls called out. She stood to my right, a buff man with dark black hair and a five o’clock shadow standing next to her. A small child, hers also, I presumed, turned to her mother.
“Mommy, can I get her autograph?”
Mrs. Smalls smiled and shook her head. “I’ll bring it home to you next time I see her,” she said.
I nodded at her. “Sure thing.”
I continued to squeeze through the crowd, trying to make my way home. Exhaustion pulled at me. It’d been such a long day. My bed would feel heavenly right now.
A flash of red caught my eye, but it was gone just as suddenly. For a brief moment, I pretended that Ariel and Jasmine were here, rooting me on. I envisioned them walking next to me, our friendship strong and unbroken. But they were gone, not returning any of my calls or text for forgiveness. I considered writing them a letter. It’s harder to ignore letters. Especially hand-written ones. If they ignored the letter, then I’d just have to storm the door to their apartments. Ariel and Jasmine had been my best friends for years, and I was not just going to let that slip away. I would do whatever I had to do to win them back. To have them forgive me.
Everything except lie, of course.
I promised myself that no matter how long it took, or how much groveling I had to do, we would be friends again. It was a promise that I intended to keep.
I was stopped five more times with accolades. Finally, I burst through the front door and spilled in to the outside. A few people were scattered about, smoking cigarettes and talking, but not many. It was freezing and starting to snow. I tugged my jacket closer and began my walk to the subway station.
“Need a lift?”
Cole’s voice was a sweet serenade to my ears.
I turned. He was leaning against a blue Honda Civic, a grin on his face. His long body was dressed in all black except for the fur around his neck. His blue eyes seemed to glow in the darkness.
He’d disappeared after my song. I assumed that he’d gone home. I was glad he didn’t. Just seeing him now warmed my entire body.
“I thought you left,” I said, walking toward him.
He shrugged. “I was going to, but there was this girl that I knew would need a ride home so...” He gave me one of his teasing smile. God. I loved his smiles.
“I guess I’d better leave before you find her, then. Wouldn’t want her to get jealous.”
“I wouldn’t worry about that.”
A soft wind blew, and I crossed my arms in front of me, trying to keep the heat in. Yet, I didn’t want to get in the car yet. There was so much unsaid between Cole and I. I feared that, if I got in his car and he took me home, that I’d never get to say any of it. I needed to tell him the truth about how I felt. He deserved that much.
“Cole, I need to tell you something,” I said.
He nodded. “Okay.”
The breath left my lungs in a long sigh, and I dug the toe of my sneaker in to the snow on the ground.
“Thank you,” I said finally. “For being there for me tonight. And in the locker room. And when I needed you for the English project, and when I needed tutoring, and on the beach, and every other time. Just...” A lump formed in my throat, and I swallowed it. Why did this feel so final? Why did this feel like goodbye?
“Just thank you,” I said. I swallowed again. It didn’t help. The lump bobbed back in place.
Cole shifted his weight against his car.
“You’re welcome.”
“And I’m sorry about what happened to your brother and sister, and about your mom. I’m sorry that I pushed you away when you told me how you felt. I was confused and scared and just...” I let out a foggy breath and shook my head. Hot tears welled up behind my eyes. Why was this so hard? “I’m sorry, okay? For everything that I did that hurt you.” A single tear fell down my cheek, and I quickly wiped it away. I felt it’s watery trail freeze on my cheek. “I was stupid and dumb and naïve. I hope that, one day, you can forgive me.”
He nodded, and broke eye contact with me, looking off to his right.
The lump in my throat got bigger, and I looked down at the ground. He didn’t forgive me. Whatever Cole and I had, was now over. Officially.
I nodded and turned from him, walking in the direction of the train station, hoping that I could make it to the gate without completely falling apart.
“I didn’t call you a ninja turtle.”
I turned around, frowning.
“What?”
Cole walked toward me, his boots crunching over the snow.
“That day in the hallway when I called you Michelangelo, I wasn’t calling you a ninja turtle. I was trying to be witty and tell you that you looked like a work of art, but it came out wrong. Every time I tried to say something nice to you, it came out as some stupid joke, and I’m sorry for that. I should have told you that I loved you the first day I saw you, but I was scared and stupid.”
I looked in to his eyes, so blue and warm despite the cold.
“You loved me?”
“From the first time I saw you.”
He brushed his thumb over my cheek, smoothing away the icy tears. I leaned in to his touch, and closed my eyes. Could it be? Could there still be a chance for us?
I opened my eyes and gazed at Cole. He was so beautiful, inside and out. No other boy lit a spark in my soul like Cole did. I knew in that moment that no boy ever would. Cole had loved me once. It was time to stop being afraid. It was time to finally take the one thing that I wanted.
“I love you, too, Cole.”
My chest tightened, and my body flushed.
Cole looked taken aback, and fluttered his eyes.
“Can you, uh, say that again?” he asked.
I took a deep breath, saying it louder this time.
“I love you, Cole. Even if you don’t feel the same, I want you to know it.”
And there it was. My heart was laid out in the snow, ready for him to receive or stomp on it. I had never been so vulnerable, so open, in my life. It was terrifying, but, at the same time, freeing.
He closed his eyes, and leaned his head back. A little hum escaped his throat. Then, his eyes opened and he looked at me with such emotion that it made my heart race.
“I have been waiting so long for you to say that. I just had to hear it twice. I love you, too, Bella. I’ve never stopped loving you.”
And then, his lips swooped in to cover mine, stealing what little breath I had in my lungs. My entire body glowed with happiness. With the joy that came from being loved and loving in return.
He kissed me until our toes froze in the snow. Then we climbed in his car, and he kissed me some more. Each press of his lips was like pure light. A dream that I never wanted to awake from.
He held my hand and kissed me at every red light and stop sign. I was so happy that I thought I’d burst!
When we pulled up to the front of my apartment, he unhooked his seatbelt, pulled me toward him, and kissed me some more.
“We have a lot of time to make up for,” he whispered against my lips. “Two and a half years of missed kisses.”
“How much time did we put in tonight?” I asked, my smile wide.
“Not even a day.” I closed my eyes and fell in love with him a little more. Cole’s kisses were quickly becoming my new favorite thing.
“But there’s something that I have to ask you first,” he said.
“What?”
“Will you be my girlfriend?”
I chuckled against his lips.
“It’s a little late for that, isn’t it?”
“I just wanted to hear you say it.”
“Okay. I’ll be your girlfriend, Cole. Forever and ever.”
He stilled.
“Say it again.”
My smile widened.
“I, Bella French, take you, Cole Winsted, to be my boyfriend.”
He smiled against my lips. “I love it when you say it twice.”
I laughed out loud and pushed him. He dramatically fell backwards though he was so strong I knew it wasn’t because of my push. Then, he climbed out of the car and walked around to open my door, and, to my surprise, walked me in to my lobby.
“Are you going to be valiant and walk me to my door?”
He shook his head. “Nope. I’m going to go upstairs and meet your dad. He’ll need to know who his daughter’s new boyfriend is.”
I snorted. “Seriously?”
He squeezed my hand. “Seriously.”
I smiled. I was bringing home my first boyfriend. It was a little nerve wrecking, but I had learned an important lesson. With Cole by my side, nothing really bad could happen. He made everything better.
We stepped off the elevator and walked toward my door.