Nineteen

Haisley

The moment we arrived back at his house, I went to my room to call Jamaica. She burst into tears when she answered the phone. Jamaica didn’t have to be pregnant to be emotional. She was always the one I worried about the most. Her demons went deep, and she was so fragile.

“Don’t cry,” I told her, choking up myself.

“I can’t help it. I miss you so much.”

“I miss you too. Tell me how you are. How things are at home.”

She sniffled, and I could picture her wiping away the tears on her face. “The same, except I have a newfound respect for all you did for us, growing up. Your shoes are really hard to fill. I don’t do as good of a job.”

“I’m sure you do a wonderful job. You’re much nicer than me.”

She laughed. “Not so much these days. DJ called me a bitch when I made him clean up their room, and Vulcan said he misses your cooking, that mine sucks.”

“They are all assholes. I love them, but they’re still assholes. Don’t let the boys get to you. How is Silver? I’m going to call her next.”

Jamaica sighed. “She’s been difficult. She’s angry with Mom. In a bad way. She hates her for sending you away. She rarely speaks to her, and she stays out late. She’s seeing this older guy, who I know is in a gang. I wish AJ would come back and help with her.”

I rubbed my temple. Silver was always the wild one. I had worried about this.

“I’ll talk to her. Maybe I can do something.”

“I’d ask how you are, but seeing as how Mr. Hot and Sexy Saxon Houston showed up at the trailer, giving us phones, I’d say you’re doing good. When did that happen? Last we heard, you were living in Gainesville in an apartment with some strangers. DJ yelled at Mom about it. He swore if something happened to you, she was going to pay.”

I winced. DJ was trying to be the head of the house with AJ gone. I should have guessed that.

“I’m doing good. Saxon found out about the pregnancy and moved me into his place. He got me better medical insurance and a really good OB-GYN. We heard the baby’s heartbeat.”

“Ohmigod! You did?! I wish I could have heard it. I’m so glad you are safe and being taken care of. It will be easier to sleep at night.”

A door slammed in the background, and I heard Vulcan and Thorn yelling at each other. Smiling, I lay back on the bed. I missed the assholes.

“You got a fucking phone?!” Vulcan shouted. “How?”

“Haisley’s baby daddy gave it to me. This is her on the phone. Want to talk to her?”

There was noise, then a, “Hayes!” Vulcan’s voice was changing.

I squeezed the phone tighter.

“How’s my favorite oldest twin brother?” I asked him, smiling.

“Missing your grilled cheeses. Jamaica can’t cook anything but noodles.”

“She’s learning. Don’t be so hard on her.”

“Your baby daddy is bringing phones to us now? What’s up with that? He taking care of you?”

I glanced at the closed door. “Yeah, he is.”

“Good. One last person’s ass I gotta kick.”

I laughed, shaking my head. This was exactly what my heart needed.

Saxon didn’t say much when I stepped out of the bedroom, dressed for the party. His eyes said a lot, but that was all I had to go on. I worried on our walk to the house that my hair wasn’t what he wanted. I’d curled it and then twisted it up so that it was off my shoulders and neck. Maybe he liked it down better. But then I hadn’t said anything about how he looked in a tuxedo either. My words had left me, and my mouth had gone dry.

The house was all lit up as guests arrived in expensive cars. Once we reached the house, people called out to him, and he greeted them. He clearly knew how to live in this world. Me, on the other hand? I was clueless. I managed to smile and say something when I was spoken to, but it wasn’t much.

Saxon’s hand on my lower back as he led me up the stairs was my only source of comfort. The front doors were wide open with music and the smell of Christmas spilling out. It was even more decorated than it had been earlier this week.

Saxon’s mother saw us, and she put on a bright smile as she walked our way, wearing an emerald-green dress that did in fact show a lot more skin than mine did. She also looked amazing in it.

“Saxon,” she said, fake kissing his cheeks. Then turning to me. “Hello, Haisley. You look lovely.”

“Thank you,” I replied. “So do you.”

She held her bright smile, but I could see the disapproval in her eyes. I wasn’t good enough for Saxon. I never would be.

“Please go mingle,” she said before moving past us to greet someone who had just arrived.

“This is what she loves,” he whispered, leaning down to me.

“She’s very good at it,” I told him.

He didn’t seem impressed. He just nodded his head in agreement.

We walked into the large living room, where we’d had our meeting, and it had been transformed into something straight out of a magazine.

“I’m going to get a drink. You want a water? Club soda? I can send someone to get milk from the kitchen if you prefer.”

I shook my head. “No. I’m fine.” I was afraid I’d spill anything I had on my dress.

He stepped away, then over to the bar, and I was alone. In the midst of a crowd of strangers. I hoped he hurried.

“We meet again,” a deep voice said beside me, and I turned to look up at who I thought was Kye.

Tensing, I shifted away. I didn’t want him to close.

He chuckled. “You wound me, beautiful. I don’t normally elicit that response from women.”

I tensed. “Just the ones you gag and hold a gun against their back?” I asked.

He laughed. I didn’t.

“Come on now. That was just business. You were safe.”

I didn’t find the humor in it. I never would.

He leaned down close to me. “I don’t like that you’re scared of me. Let’s be friends. I’m a great friend,” he said, his voice lowering, as if he meant something else.

“Kye,” Saxon said, coming up beside me.

I was right about his name.

Relieved, I backed up until my back was touching him. His hand slipped around my waist.

“Don’t let him scare you. He’s full of shit,” Saxon said to me.

“Looks like you two are cozy again,” Kye said, grinning as he took a drink from his glass. “It’s always good when the parents can get along.”

“Did you not bring a date?” Saxon asked him.

Kye shrugged. “Wasn’t in the mood for the drama. Plus, I have to step out early. Genesis needs me.”

The best friend that everyone thought was more than that, but she was engaged.

“Wedding plans?” Saxon asked.

“Something like that,” Kye replied, and his demeanor took a complete one-eighty.

The easygoing flirt that hinted at the danger underneath now looked damaged and unsettled. Maybe they were onto something with this best friend of his. I just hoped he didn’t end up killing the guy she was engaged to.

“Saxon.” Declan’s voice made my stomach knot up. “Your mother said she saw you come this way. I’m sorry I’m late.”

Her eyes went to Saxon’s hand on my stomach, and they widened. Then, she glared at me.

“Where’s the popcorn when you need it?” Kye drawled.

“Saxon, we need to talk. Alone,” Declan told him, shifting her hateful glare from me to him.

“We did that already. You know everything. What more do we need to talk about?” Saxon asked, his hand dropping from me. It was as if he’d slapped me in the face.

“Yes, we did. But what you told me and what I am seeing are two different things. If she’s some girl you accidentally knocked up and are having to take care of because she’s poor, then why are you touching her like you’re here with her when I’m your date tonight? Our seats at the table are together.”

I was going to either be sick or cry. Probably both. I needed air. My gaze swung around for an exit, but outside was full of people too.

“Excuse me,” I said, stepping past Declan and heading in a direction where there were no people.

I didn’t stop until I made it to an empty hallway. Then, I looked around, opening doors until I found some stairs, and decided to take them. I would mess up my makeup if I cried. I just needed a moment. I could get myself under control. I was tough. I could do this. I would be fine.

At the top of the stairs was a wider hallway with doors scattered down each side. I stood there, taking several deep breaths, not sure if I should open doors, looking for a bathroom, or just stand here until I was okay to return downstairs.

I had told myself that he was just being friendly. Making the best of a bad situation. He wanted to get along with me for our child’s sake. He did not want me.

Sure, he thought I was attractive. We had dated. But he didn’t feel anything more for me. Declan, however, had some kind of hold on him. His mom liked her. He let her come in his house and demand he talk to her. She thought they were dating. She had called me poor and made me sound like a charity case.

Had he said those things to her? Was that why he’d bought the phones?

I placed my hand over my heart. Oh God, this hurt so bad. Was this a heart breaking? I’d thought it already had when I had to push him away, but this was worse. It was physically hurting me.

Two hands grabbed my waist from behind and began pushing me forward. I gasped and looked back to see Saxon behind me. His face hard. His jaw clenched. He pushed me, forcing me to walk to a door that he opened. He shoved me into the room before slamming the door and locking it behind him. I spun around and stared at him.

He stalked over to me. “Don’t fucking leave me again.” His hand reached out as he grabbed my chin and looked down at me. “She’s a bitch. A jealous, lying bitch. I was going to handle her. You don’t walk away. She thinks she wins if you do. She hasn’t won shit.”

I pulled my face out of his hold and crossed my hands over my stomach. “She called me poor. Am I a charity case to you, Saxon? Is that what this is? Are you being nice to me because you got some poor loser?”

His hand shot out, and he grabbed my neck. “Don’t you ever call yourself a loser. Or a fucking charity case. That’s not what you are, and you damn well know it.”

I glared up at him. “Then, what am I, Saxon? Are we friends now? Is that what we are doing? Because let me tell you that I am so confused by you right now.”

He squeezed my neck and lowered his face to mine. “Is that what you want? Do you want to be friends? You want me to pretend like I don’t think about how fucking sweet you taste? That I don’t jerk off in the shower, remembering how you look when you orgasm?”

I was breathing fast. “No.”

“Then, tell me, Haisley what you want from me.”

“I want you touch me,” I whispered.

“I’m touching you right now. You’re gonna need to be more specific.”

Licking my lips, I stared up at him. His eyes dropped to my mouth.

“If I kiss you right now, we won’t leave this room, and my mom will find us. This will be the first place she looks.”

The hunger in his gaze made me ache.

“Maybe not.” My words sounded desperate.

I inhaled deep and long, and his hand on my neck eased its grip. I wanted to grab it and hold it there. Beg him not to stop. To go with what he was feeling.

“This is my room, Haisley. If she hasn’t realized we’re missing yet, she’ll notice soon and be at that door.”

His hand dropped away, and I let out a shaky breath. My eyes took in the space we were in, and I realized it was a huge bedroom with trophies, footballs, jerseys, a massive flat screen, a sofa, and a king-size bed. This was what he’d grown up with as a bedroom. I wasn’t jealous or envious. I liked knowing he’d had this.

He took my hand and threaded his fingers through mine. “Let’s go.” His voice was deep and clearly affected by this. By us.

Would he still feel the same when we got back to the house tonight? God, I hoped so.

We walked out of the room, but he took me in a different direction than I had come. Instead, we passed a couple of other doors, then came out the top of the entryway. The chandelier hung just ahead with red berries intertwined throughout it. I wondered who had gotten on a ladder that tall to decorate it. When we reached the stairs, Saxon continued to hold my hand as he led me down the wide, curvy staircase. People were no longer arriving, and the few who still stood around, talking with glasses of champagne, shifted their gazes up to us. It dawned on me that they would assume we had been together in his former bedroom.

My cheeks warmed, and I dropped my gaze to watch my feet as we covered the last few steps. I was already pregnant. I didn’t want everyone here to think I was the girl from the wrong side of town who couldn’t keep her legs together. Who trapped rich guys. I had heard the gossip at school when people talked about my mom and all my siblings. I knew what they thought of me when they saw me.

“Saxon,” a man greeted him as we walked onto the marble floor.

“Tidewell,” Saxon replied. “It’s good to see you.”

“I hear you’re stepping up too. It seems the ranks are all getting a new generation, starting with Blaise,” he said with a bright smile on his face, as if he wanted Saxon’s approval.

Saxon nodded. “It was inevitable.” Then, he turned his attention to me. “Haisley, this is Bartmore Tidewell. He runs one of the casinos in Vegas for the family.” He shifted his gaze back to the man. “Tidewell, this is Haisley Slate.”

The man glanced at our linked hands, and he chuckled. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Haisley. Hang on to this one. They don’t get much finer than him. He’s a good guy.”

I wanted to tell him I would hang on as tightly as I could, but I wasn’t sure my grip had much hold. Instead, I returned his smile and said, “I’ll do my best.”

His laugh was full and belly deep. “I doubt it will be difficult. He seems rather taken with you.” His eyes shifted back to Saxon. “I look forward to working with all of you.”

Saxon simply gave him a polite smile. “Yes. I’m sure I’ll see you soon enough. Enjoy the evening, and happy holidays.”

As we walked back into the living room, Saxon leaned down close to my ear. “There are more people I’d like you to meet, but first, I need to go handle the seating for dinner. You will be seated beside me. Not fucking Declan.”

The way his hand tightened as he held mine before releasing it gave me hope.