Growing up, my brothers and I never had rooms of our own. Ours was an open house, with family members and friends always staying over. My mother’s parents lived with us and my father’s mother visited often, so we slept on mattresses spread on the floor of our parents’ or grandparents’ bedroom. It never felt like an imposition because we didn’t know any other life and ours was a very happy one.
Mummy truly is the backbone of our family, and even as adults, all three of us remain very close to her. The house comes alive when she is up and about every morning – all the grandchildren stream into her room, her sons and daughters-in-law count on her to help them out, and if I am in Delhi, I am nearly always by her side. My daughter, Rhea, who studies in Delhi lives with my family. All of this as she plans menus, supervises the cooks and gets the house in order for the inevitable party that evening.
Even before she had staff to help her as she does now, Mummy managed everything with great cheer. My father worked long hours and was often travelling, but no matter how early he left the house each morning or how late he returned at night, he would always give us hugs and kisses, even if we were asleep. My mother raised us, ran the house and cooked these huge feasts nearly every day, so it was part of our routine too.
Nihal, Sahil and I would come home from school and go straight to the kitchen. I would help my mother, while the boys hung around to chat. I don’t think any of us ever went out with friends or had plans of our own – we were always together, usually in the kitchen, preparing for a dinner party! That’s how we were brought up, so it is an indelible part of our lives but I do wonder, even today, how my mother managed to make it such a seamless part of her life given that she grew up in a home that was very regimented, very quiet and completely different from the one she entered as a young bride. She had to learn how to cook, and then to host parties that might have intimidated even a professional chef.
You never knew how many people would be coming to dinner and which of them might be a celebrity, a politician, a head of state or a famous musician or sports-person. If my father said thirty people, it almost always meant fifty, and this is still true. With very little help in the kitchen, Mummy would make her signature dishes calmly, laughing and talking with the three of us and any other family members who were around. I usually helped set the table, fill the house with flowers and candles or diyas. We used to host a legendary Christmas lunch for nearly 200 people, for which Mummy and I would cook for a day and a half while also getting the house ready for so many guests, making sure we had enough plates and cutlery, etc. And whether it was five people coming to dinner or 200, Mummy would insist on looking her best and greeting each guest with a genuine smile. I think, speaking for myself, it has been the biggest lesson I have learnt from her.
At our home, every single family member is a part of every single party. Whether we had examinations or we didn’t feel like it, there was no excuse. I was in Class 12, it was the night before my final examinations and we had people over; my father insisted I come downstairs and say hello. It’s still how things are at my parents’ home – everyone is expected to be at a party. And there is no fawning allowed. Even if a world-famous cricketer was at our table, eating biryani, we were not encouraged to take pictures with him or ask him for his autograph! My father has always maintained that when someone steps into our home, they are a friend, and so they must feel that this is a safe space to be themselves in.
We were never told to score high marks, and our parents never lectured us about exams. We were expected to study and do our best, of course. If one of us woke up feeling too tired to go to school, it was not seen as the end of the world. Instead, they would say, ‘Okay, darling, go back to sleep.’ Occasionally a teacher would summon my mother to school to complain about one of us and it was never pleasant, but when she would tell my father about it, he would say, ‘Don’t worry. They will all do well in life.’
Looking back now, we realize the value of what they taught us – to hold our own in a group of people, to be able to have interesting conversations about a range of topics, and to understand the value of maintaining relationships.
Anisha
Many years ago, I had a rare free day – Peter had not made his usual call to let me know how many people were coming home for dinner – and I decided to visit an exhibition to do some shopping. When I got there, Peter called and said he had just invited twenty or thirty people over; because he knew I was out, he had sent someone to buy the meat and bring it home for me to cook. I suppose I could have got irritated but it was what it was. So, I quickly wrapped up my shopping and rushed home to make biryani for our guests. And this is the story of my life, which has been repeated countless times.
I wish I had a magic formula to give people when they ask me how I manage to cook for large parties, and host them without having a breakdown, but I don’t. It has been over four decades now and has thus become second nature to me. I promise you that I have learnt by trial and error. It helps that I am not someone who loses my composure under pressure, and that I do enjoy cooking for people and welcoming them into our home. To me, there’s very little difference between cooking for four people and cooking for forty because the intention is the same – to make sure that each person feels welcome, eats a delicious meal and leaves our home happy.
Hosting people is such an integral aspect of our life and home, and the whole family is involved. As Anisha has written, she and her brothers were always a part of planning and hosting, even when they were little. Today, our grandchildren are encouraged to come say hello to the guests and the little ones love toasting people with their glasses of juice, which never fails to delight everyone. Anisha always helped me in the kitchen and if she is visiting Delhi, will still do it; my sons handle the bar and the décor, with help from my daughters-in-law. We all bounce ideas off one another and together, get everything done. We’ve never hired caterers, or ordered food in, as a matter of principle. There’s always a home-cooked meal on the table.
The most important piece of advice that I can share about hosting a party is to make it easy for yourself by being organized, playing to your strengths and keeping it simple. For example, in our home, the food we serve is primarily Hyderabadi and the dish that I am best known for is biryani. I have lost count of how many kilograms of biryani I have cooked over these decades, and boxes of it have been carted across the world on request from friends and family. I started out serving Hyderabadi food simply because it’s what I learnt to cook and I found that everyone enjoyed it very much. Over the years, I’ve tried and perfected heirloom recipes and experimented enough to create my own, so I don’t deviate from my repertoire. I also enjoy serving Goan dishes, though the lack of good seafood in Delhi does not allow for it often.
By now, I could possibly draw up a menu if I was asked to in my sleep, but it took me a while to make the right combinations. (I have offered a list of my trusted menus at the end of this chapter, to get you started.) I prefer serving time-honoured pairings such as Mirchi ka Saalan with a biryani, and Tamatar ka Kut with Khubooli, for example, to form the heart of the meal, and then I choose dishes that complement them, even if they are not always traditionally paired together. There is always enough vegetarian food on the table because I would never want a guest to go home hungry and, I need to eat too at the end of the evening!
As someone who used to cook all the meals herself, I very much appreciate the help I have now in the kitchen from my trusted cooks and staff. That said, what has not changed is that I am very involved in the making of the meal. The most important thing to do is to prepare ahead of time. Decide on your menu a day or two in advance at least. It will give you enough time to shop for what you need. Check to see what can be prepared ahead of time – you can roast or grind masalas and store them and chop vegetables too. If the recipe requires it, you must marinate the meat well in advance. Make sure you don’t choose to serve too many dishes that need frying or grilling at the last minute, which might need you to be in the kitchen instead of being with your guests.
Now that I have staff members to help me, I make sure I let them know what to do so I don’t have to worry about things but I do pop into the kitchen before we serve dinner, just to make sure everything is on schedule, and there are no mishaps. Earlier, I would do everything myself, with help from Anisha and maybe one more person, but we would make sure there was a system in place and we worked as per it. For instance, I always serve dinner at 10 p.m. sharp, unless there is a compelling reason to delay it.
If something does go wrong, please don’t have a meltdown. Just smile and get through the evening – if you don’t tell anyone that there’s been a disaster, no one will know but learn from your mistakes. At a couple of our Christmas lunches many years ago, I had a dosa station set up in the garden – we lived in Hauz Khas and our home had a lovely outdoor space. While everyone enjoyed eating hot, crisp dosas in the winter, it was difficult to organize and manage. We used to invite nearly 200 people, which meant there was a rush at the counter all afternoon. Things got chaotic and I abandoned the idea after trying it out a couple of times.
And then there have been other moments, which my children love to recall. A favourite anecdote of theirs is one about a guest who came quite late to a dinner; everyone else had eaten by then, and moved on to dessert. The children, who were quite young at the time, were eating at the table, when he went to serve himself biryani. Next to it were a bowl of raita and a bowl of ice-cream, which had melted by then. He ended up helping himself to a generous portion of ice-cream, and the kids did nothing to stop him because they wanted to see what would happen. He praised me endlessly for serving such a sweet raita with the spicy biryani, and went back for a second helping. Of course, my children thought it was priceless and they still laugh about it.
When it comes to décor, we like using fresh flowers and candles to dress the house up but never do anything too dramatic because it is our home and not a hotel. In the summer, we scatter fresh jasmine flowers on the dining table and fill bowls of water with them, which we place around the room. Sometimes, I like to combine jasmine with rose petals, which creates a beautiful blend of fragrances and the colours are quite striking. The possibilities of decorating with flowers are endless and you cannot go wrong – bunches of chrysanthemums in mason jars or diyas and lotuses floating in urlis or just simple combinations of seasonal local flowers placed in a large vase on the centre table. In the winter, I rely on candles, which I like to place in unusual jars, or bunch together on large platters. They add warmth and bring a calming energy to the room.
Don’t do anything that will stress you out. If you have fun at your own party, your guests will too. That’s a cardinal rule. I like getting things done well in time to catch my breath, get dressed and greet the guests as they come into our home. Before Anisha got married and moved away, she and I had a lot of fun planning our outfits and doing one another’s nails after we finished cooking and before the guests started streaming in. No matter how busy my day has been and even if it is my fourth dinner in a week, I like spending time choosing what to wear and getting into the right frame of mind for the evening. No-one likes being greeted by tired hosts, and it is your responsibility to set the tone for the party.
Peter and I spend time on guest lists because it is essential to invite the right mix of people, and to make sure that no-one will feel out of place. Some evenings, our guests are a combination of business magnates, politicians, ministers, bureaucrats and journalists and some evenings, it’s a small group of close friends. If we are inviting someone for the first time, we do our best to ensure that they will have some like-minded company. I like to pay attention to notice if a guest appreciated a certain dish and try to make sure a dish they enjoyed in the past is on the menu.
I have made so many wonderful friends, and had countless interesting conversations with people over the years – I would have missed out on so much if I had been annoyed or distracted. At the end of the day, I think the secret to being a good host or hostess is to plan the kind of party that you would like to go to. And don’t do anything that makes you uncomfortable. People always tell us that whether it was their first time at our home or they have been coming over for decades, they feel like a part of our family. I always feel very happy whenever I hear it because I know that if that’s how they feel, we’ve played our part well.
ONE
NARGISI KABABS
DUM KA MURGH
HALEEM
MIRCHI KA SAALAN
DAHI KI KADHI
TAMATAR KA KUT
DUM KI MACHLI
KACHCHI BIRYANI
PHIRNEE
TWO
DUM KA KHEEMA
MURGH MUSSALAM
GOSHT KI KADHI
DAHI KI KADHI
BAGHARE BAINGAN
TAMATAR KA KUT
TAMATAR KI CHUTNEY
SAFED CHAWAL
KHUBOOLI
MUTTON PULAO
DOUBLE KA MEETHA
THREE
TALA HUA GOSHT
KALEJI GURDA
DUM KI MACHLI
MURGH METHI
MIRCHI KA SAALAN
TAMATAR ALOO
KADDU KA DALCHA
SAFED CHAWAL
FOUR
MUTTON CHAAP
IMLI MURGH
MACHLI MAHI QALIYA
TAMATAR JHINGA
KADDU KA DALCHA
NARANGI DHAL
NIMBU ZAFRANI PULAO
This is one of my favourite menus, and I was inspired to create it when I heard this story. Before I recount it, however, you should know that there were two classic ways of table-setting in traditional Hyderabadi homes. Prior to the 1950s, the most popular one was the dastarkhan; a tablecloth was spread on the carpeted floor, and dishes were arranged on the cloth. Diners sat cross-legged too, and ate with their plates on the cloth.
In the early 1950s, the Paigah nobles, an aristocratic family in Hyderabad, found the dastarkhan too cumbersome. They wanted to eat dinner, especially, outdoors, dressed in flowing robes and they created the chowki form of service and dining. They would spread carpets outdoors, and cover them with white cloths called channis. Four tables, called chowkis, were placed on each carpet and covered in white tablecloths, offset by runners in red or a similarly contrasting colour. Coloured grains of rice, silver powder and rose petals were scattered around each chowki, which was set for eight people. And the meal was served.
The story that enchanted me was of a certain nawab – unfortunately, I don’t know his name – who loved to serve chowki dinners on full moon nights. All the dishes served, from the khormas to pulaos to desserts, were white in colour. And the chowkis would be decorated with white jasmine flowers. Guests ate off silver plates, and the dishes were also served in silverware. My White Menu has been inspired by this anonymous nawab and his unique aesthetic. I serve this dinner on silverware too, and use white seasonal flowers in the décor.
MUTTON ISTEW
RAAN KA SAALAN
MURGHH KA SAFED PULAO
SHAHI MURGH
SAFED KHORMA
PYAZ PATHA AUR JHINGA
SAFED MIRCHI KA SAALAN
MAASH KI DHAL
RESHMI PARATHA
PHIRNEE
BADAAM KA HALWA
It’s rare that one hears of an idea for a piece of work and thinks how perfectly it fits the person who’s creating it. But in the case of Doreen Aunty and this book of stories and recipes, this is exactly what I feel. For over fifteen years, I’ve been going to dinners at her home, and the company, hospitality and food have always been exquisite. I was introduced to the treasures of Hyderabadi food through evenings at her home and have been known to be shameless when piling my plate! But beyond that, Doreen Aunty has always been able to create a certain atmosphere. I was very young – still a teenager – when she, Peter Uncle and my parents became friends. At their home, I could partake in wonderful conversations with interesting people from around the world, and find my feet in a safe and stimulating adult environment. I was always made to feel at home. I have a great love for both Doreen Aunty and Peter Uncle, and I can’t wait to have this book on my shelf in my own home!
Anoushka Shankar
When I think of Hyderabad, I think of food, when I think of food, I think of Peter and Doreen Hassan’s dastarkhan. Because Doreen’s dastarkhan is not just about the food. It is about the warmth and grace of how it is presented and served. In this case it is both in equal measure. Difficult to draw a line. It is not just about menus and recipes but about relationships and traditions which later turn to memories and nostalgia.
Hyderabadi cuisine in the hands of Doreen comes alive. Her biryanis and pulaos retain the freshness of a breath which has acquired almost an ethereal feel. And even those who claim to have given up desserts are seen digging into her Badaam ki Jali and Khubani ka Meetha. Meera, my wife, for one.
Food is a blessing which is given as a host and received as guest. And you can feel this sacred exchange invariably happen at Doreen’s table.
Muzaffar Ali
Peter and Doreen have been wonderful friends to me and my family; we first met two decades ago in Washington. We thank God for giving us their friendship, which is richly remembered for so many things, including their stories of life in India. Over the years, we have appreciated their good nature and their many acts of kindness.
H.E. Mr S.R. Nathan
(President of Singapore 1999-2011)
As a foreign envoy to India, I learnt with a seasoned and highly respected Russian colleague that India is the land ofkarma bhoomi (work),gyana (pure knowledge) andprem–maitri (love and friendship). These fundamentals of the Indian way of life came alive for Guadalupe, my wife, and me on our very first day of work in India during a lovely family dinner at Doreen and Peter’s house. The sole fact of receiving an invitation for an exclusive gathering at an Indian residence at the very beginning of our tenure seemed to us quite extraordinary. Love and friendship came along with an outstanding Hyderabadi biryani, where we could savour the mix of the right amount of many ingredients. It was not a simple bouquet of senses, it was a whole spice market turned into a work of art. Khubani ka Meetha for dessert just added a sense of ethereal gustative pleasure that only Doreen’s hard work and talent could have produced.
We then understood that India is the land of spices (masala bhoomi), but it takes a master to orchestrate the various flavours into something that translates into a beautiful music. Doreen is capable of that with charm and grace and a great degree of humbleness. One problem remains, however: how can one taste such good Indian cuisine outside Doreen’s home? Maybe her recipes could help. Just maybe.
Guadalupe & H.E. Tovar da Silva Nunes
Ambassador of Brazil in India
Few cuisines have impressed me as much as the Hyderabadi, for its uniqueness, creativity, taste, spices, aroma and variety. And I have had the pleasure of enjoying Hyderabadi cuisine largely due to the warmth, affection and hospitality of Doreen Hassan. This book, which is a lucid, open-hearted, first-person account accompanied by brilliant photographs, is a must-read.
Amitabh Kant
Peter bhai and Doreen love having people over and when someone is genuinely joyful about your presence in their home, it shows. It shows in the smiling eyes as stories and conversations abound, and especially in the loving care with which Doreen prepares her splendid food in a home that exudes so much love and warmth.
Anita Dongre
There is a small percentage of people who look beyond their defined area and see opportunities beyond the ordinary. Doreen and Peter Hassan are two such individuals. Beyond their business and family they have reached out from New Delhi to people from many parts of the world and have made and maintained lasting friendships. It is therefore a great delight to add from New Zealand from my wife Susan and I, very best wishes on the publication of this book, in which some of this special chemistry will doubtless be exhibited.
Rt. Hon. Sir Anand Stayanand & Lady Susan
Governor General of New Zealand 2006–11
I call Doreen’s house ‘home’, because of which I have been blessed with love, care and great soirées around the table. In the Hassan home, everything is cared for: from the way they invite you over, to how they receive you, the drinks they share with you and, most of all the food they so lavishly present to you. Love enters through the eyes and presentation and beauty is the first thing you’ll remember about a meal in that household, not to mention the aromas – inviting, wholesome and warm.
H.E. Melba Pria
Ambassador of Mexico in India
We’ve always enjoyed the exquisite cuisine at Doreen’s table. It was only earlier this year that she cooked in our kitchen in London and I was amazed at how she keeps it simple and produces the most exquisite flavours. We wish her every success with the book that she’s put together with so much love.
Girija & H.E. Yash Sinha
High Commissioner of India to the United Kingdom
At Doreen and Peter’s Delhi home, the delectable Hyderabadi cuisine served with generous Hyderabadi warmth is always the greatest attraction and this combination makes the table at their home among the finest in the city.
C. Raja Mohan
Doreen and Peter Hassan are known for their hospitality and the lavish and delicious spread of Hyderabadi dishes served at their well-attended parties. Having been to several banquets in their warm home, I also know that our smiling and lovely hostess is always the master chef of each superb meal. This delightful book offers those traditional recipes to everyone.
Begum Bilkis I. Latif
Doreen Hassan is the perfect hostess who believes that every occasion is a celebration and unique. As simple as she is, so are her recipes and her food introduces the rich and traditional cuisine of Hyderabad to the entire world.
Drs Radha & Raja Reddy
Doreen is legendary for her table and evenings at Peter and Doreen’s are always a pleasure! Apart from the interesting conversations, it is Doreen’s table laden with delicacies and treasured family recipes that are a highlight.
Priya Paul
At the risk of being stoned by Patthar ka Gosht, I am convinced that the best Hyderabadi food is not available in Hyderabad. It is in New Delhi in Doreen Hassan’s home. I can vouch for this as a fairly regular visitor to her place for the last thirty-five years. Given the authentic, high quality of Hyderabadi food that she has been dishing out for more than three decades in Delhi, Doreen’s book promises to be the last word in cuisine from that part of India.
Sona & Ashok Jha
This is the story of a young Goan girl who barely knew how to brew a cup of tea when she got married to a man from Hyderabad and who has transformed herself into a connoisseur of the most delicate and flavourful Hyderabadi cuisine. The thing about the Hassans, as I’ve seen first-hand over the years, is that the fine line between intimacy and otherness is bridged by Doreen’s food.
Jyoti Malhotra
I feel very proud to say that I have always shared a very special relationship with Peter Toghrille Hassan. In my mind, the Hassan family symbolizes the unique cradle of cosmopolitan culture which was the hallmark of the Hyderabad of yesteryears. I have known many distinguished members of his family for nearly eight decades, or to be precise, since 1940.
I have known Peter, as also Doreen, on very intimate terms from their childhood days. Both of them hail from well-known Hyderabadi families. In their marriage, one saw the coming together of two of Hyderabad’s prominent, highly erudite families of that memorable era, which remains etched in one’s mind as a golden epoch in the annals of the state.
Nawab Shah Alam Khan
My husband’s ties with the Hassans go back many years, and we have long been friends with Peter and Doreen - our children have grown up together. I love seeing her, eating the delicious meals she makes and spending time with her. Doreen’s food is really the best of Hyderabadi cuisine.
Leela Khan
Dining at the Hassans’ is always an unalloyed pleasure. The Hassan home is always an open house where even an impromptu meal is no less than an elaborate feast. Doreen’s delectable food is doubtlessly the centrepiece of the famed Hassan hospitality. But equally exceptional is the warmth and spontaneity with which they indulge their guests, making each one feel special and wanted.
Ameeta & Rajiv Kapoor
The Hassans’ hospitality is legendary and the food is to die for. I always feel so welcome the minute I step into their beautiful home. May the contents of this book inspire all everyone – be it by honing their cooking skills or just understanding the true meaning behind the saying ‘united we stand, divided we fall’.
Aruna De Souza
Peter and Doreen moved from Hyderabad to Delhi where with their own brand of charm and hospitality, they quickly became the toast of the town. Whether it is in Hyderabad, Delhi, or Goa, the doors of this gracious couple’s home are always thrown wide open in a warm welcome to family and friends. It is my privilege and honor to be so closely associated with the Hassans and their children.
Joyce & Felix Campos
Striking a beautiful balance of elegance, style, graciousness and warmth, Doreen and Peter have generously hosted and welcomed the world into their home on many an occasion, always turning an evening into a beautiful and memorable occasion with Peter’s charisma and engaging wit and Doreen’s charming and bountiful hospitality. A meal at the Hassan home is indeed a culinary and a cultural privilege.
Cleta & Rommel Valles
As aristocrats from Hyderabad, and the city from which the Nizam once ruled, Doreen and her family epitomize grace and warmth. She has an extraordinary passion for cooking in the authentic Nizami way and this book is like no other, just like the author.
Rosalita Lawrence
Doreen Fernes Hassan, with her collection of life experiences and her devotion to home and husband’s personal and professional considerations, has evolved into a culinary expert in her own right, a gracious hostess and it is always a pleasure to spend time and dine with the Hassans at their homes in Delhi or in Hyderabad.
Marie & Eugene Campos