When supper was over, and the dishes were done, Sara volunteered to take the empty canning jar the green beans had been in down to the basement. Michelle still hadn’t returned, and Sara figured she’d probably stayed at Ezekiel’s parents’ house for supper.
Although Grandma’s meatloaf had tasted good, Sara hadn’t had much of an appetite. How could the day after Christmas turn so tragically wrong?
When Grandpa came inside after burying Rascal, he’d looked so sad it made Sara feel even worse. She’d never owned a pet, but was learning quickly how much they could be part of one’s family. Maybe I should have helped Grandpa when he buried Michelle’s dog. But Sara couldn’t bring herself to do so. How could she, when it was her fault? A few minutes alone in the basement might help, especially if she took down that old jar again and read some of the messages inside. It could even take her mind off the current situation and the guilt she felt.
Holding a flashlight in one hand, and the clean jar in the other, Sara made her way slowly down the basement stairs. When she reached the bottom, she found the battery-operated lantern and clicked it on. After putting the canning jar away, she reached up behind the antique jars and took down the one filled with notes. Taking a seat on a wooden stool, she poked her fingers in, pulled out a slip of paper, and read Matthew 7:1 silently: “Judge not, that ye be not judged.”
Sara flinched. Ever since she’d arrived at Grandma and Grandpa’s and found Michelle living here, she had been judge and jury. Michelle was guilty of impersonating her. She had openly admitted it and even apologized. But Sara had not forgiven her, and at every turn, she judged Michelle for every little thing she did.
Maybe I shouldn’t judge her. Michelle might not be the horrible person I’ve made her out to be. Sara tapped her foot. Even if she is up to no good, the Bible says I should not judge her.
Sara drew a deep breath and reached in for another piece of paper that quoted Matthew 5:44: “But I say unto you, Love your enemies.”
She swallowed hard as tears sprang to her eyes. I have seen Michelle as an enemy, but the Bible says I’m supposed to love her.
Sara squeezed her eyes shut. How am I supposed to do that? How can I love Michelle when she’s trying to take my grandparents from me?
She opened her eyes and was about to put the papers back in the jar, when she heard footsteps coming down the stairs. Hurriedly, she crammed the papers back in, but before she could make a move to return the jar to its shelf, someone spoke.
“Mary Ruth said I would find you down here.”
Sara jerked her head. Michelle stood not more than a foot away. Barely able to respond, she murmured, “I—I came down to put the empty bean jar away.”
Michelle pointed to the antique jar in Sara’s hand. “I see you found one of the mysterious prayer jars.”
Sara’s mouth opened slightly. “Y–you know about this?”
“Yes, and there’s another one on a shelf in the barn.” Michelle offered Sara a weak smile. “Some of the notes I found inside those jars helped me a lot. They made me realize what I was doing was wrong.”
Sara sat quietly, unsure of what to say. Finally, she asked another question. “Do you know who wrote the notes, or why they are in this jar?”
Michelle shook her head. “I’ve wondered if Mary Ruth might have written them, but I was hesitant to ask. Thought if she is the author, it might be too personal or she wouldn’t want to talk about it.”
Sara nodded slowly.
Michelle moved closer and touched Sara’s shoulder. “I want you to know that I forgive you. After talking about it with Ezekiel, and thinking things through, I realized it wasn’t your fault. I’m also to blame for not paying attention to my dog. Rascal shouldn’t have been chasing your car, and the snow and ice only made things worse. Will you forgive me for not accepting your apology before?”
Tears welled in Sara’s eyes. She was overwhelmed with relief. “There’s nothing to forgive on my end, but I appreciate knowing you don’t hold me responsible.”
Michelle pulled Sara into a hug, and Sara did not resist. It was the first time since she and Michelle had been living here that Sara had good feelings toward Michelle, and a great load was beginning to lift.
“I got a job today,” Michelle announced as she sat in the living room that evening with Willis, Mary Ruth, and Sara. The mood had been somber up until now.
Mary Ruth’s eyes brightened as she set her knitting needles aside. “That’s wunderbaar!”
“Jah, congratulations,” Willis said with a twinkle in his eyes.
Sara nodded as well. “Where will you be working, and what will you be doing?”
“It’s at Dienners Country Restaurant in Ronks, and I’ll be waitressing.” Michelle pulled her fingers along the top of the black apron she wore over her plain dress. “From what I hear, it’s a favorite restaurant with Amish as well as English people. And the best news of all is that I’ll be starting tomorrow.” She looked over at Willis. “I can still help you with chores before and after I get off work and also on my days off.”
He smiled. “We’ll see how it goes.”
“What are your days off?” Mary Ruth questioned.
“Sundays, Mondays, and some Saturdays—same as Sara. Of course, I would never work on Sunday, even if the restaurant was open that day.” Michelle quickly added.
“How will you get to work each day?” Mary Ruth picked up her knitting needles again. “You could drive the horse and buggy to Ronks, because there’s a hitching rail outside the restaurant, but it wouldn’t be good to leave the horse there all day.”
“You’re right,” Michelle agreed. “I’ll have to hire a driver to take me to work in the mornings. Once the spring weather takes over I can walk home from there. The three-and-a-half-mile jaunt might do me some good.” Michelle patted her stomach and giggled. “Your good cooking is catching up with me.”
“There’s no need for that.” Sara shook her head. “I’ll drop you off at the restaurant before going to work at the flower shop. Then I can pick you up again when I get off in the afternoon. Ronks isn’t that far from the flower shop.”
“It’s nice of you to offer, but my hours might not coincide with yours.”
Sara shrugged. “It doesn’t matter. If you end up working a later shift, I can always come back here after I leave work and then go to Dienners and pick you up when your afternoon shift ends.” She gave Michelle a reassuring smile. “It’s not that far away, and it won’t take long by car. Maybe ten minutes, if that. We can work something out, so don’t worry about a thing.”
Alone in their room that night, Mary Ruth sat down on the bed beside her husband. “Things are looking up, don’t you think?”
Closing the book from the page he’d been reading, Willis pushed his glasses back in place. “What’d you say?”
“I said, ‘Things are looking up.’”
He squinted at her. “In what way?”
“For one thing, after many weeks of searching, Michelle has finally found a job.”
Willis tugged his left ear. “Jah, that’s a good thing.”
She nudged his arm. “And could you believe how well Sara and Michelle got along this evening? There were no curt remarks on either side, and what a surprise when Sara offered to give Michelle a ride to and from work.”
He moved his head slowly up and down. “It was unexpected—that’s for sure. I wonder what brought on the change.”
Mary Ruth turned her hands palms up. “I have no idea, but it’s an answer to prayer. It’s sad what happened to poor Rascal today, but maybe this tragedy turned into something positive.”
“Jah, even poor Sadie seems lost right now, so she’ll need some extra attention for a spell.”
“I’m sure she misses her puppy as much as Michelle does.” Mary Ruth looked toward the window. “Do you think we should have brought Sadie inside and let her sleep in Michelle’s room tonight, or even here in ours?”
“Sadie is in the barn where she’s used to being. She might be lonely, but she’ll be okay.”
“I hope things keep going like they are between the girls. I enjoy their company so much, and to see them getting along better is such a blessing.” Mary Ruth placed both hands on her chest.
He patted her arm. “We need to pray that what happened between Sara and Michelle tonight will continue on in the days ahead.”
“I wholeheartedly agree.” Mary Ruth removed her head covering and prepared for bed. Michelle had gone up to her room early this evening, leaving them alone with Sara in the living room. Mary Ruth had been tempted to ask about her granddaughter’s change of heart but had decided it was better to hold back. If either Sara or Michelle wanted to talk with her about it, she felt sure they would. In the meantime, she’d keep praying and showing them love.
After coming upstairs, Sara stood in front of the mirror on her bedroom wall, holding one of her mother’s old heart-shaped head coverings by its ribbon-strings. She’d found it, along with several other items in the cedar chest at the foot of her bed.
I wonder how I would look wearing this. She pulled her hair back into a bun and pinned it in place, then set the kapp on her head. With the exception of the jeans and rose-colored top she wore, Sara almost looked Amish. Could I be happy wearing plain clothes all the time? she wondered. Michelle seems to be, and she has no Amish heritage.
Leaving the kapp on, Sara moved away from the mirror and took a seat on the bench near the window. She bent down to remove her shoes and socks. Wiggling her bare toes, she closed her eyes and tried to picture what her mother must have looked like when she lived here as a teenager. Was Mama unhappy being Amish, or did she run away from home only because she felt guilty and couldn’t face her parents with the truth about being pregnant?
Sara had so many unanswered questions she wished she could ask her mother right now. And of course the biggest question of all was, Who is my father?
Her eyes snapped open. Will I ever find out, and if I were to meet him, would he welcome me as his daughter? How would I react if I did find him? He’d be a stranger to me. Sara inhaled and blew out a shallow breath. Maybe it would be best if I never find the answer. I should probably forget about trying to find my father.