EVIE
Even though I have no idea what they are singing, I get it. I can feel the love and despair transcend through the music and drama. My first opera. I didn’t think I would like it, but I was wrong. As the last note rings out in the theatre, I am captivated and cannot take my eyes off the stage.
‘Thank goodness Judith and Lorna told us about this place,’ Mam is breathless and her eyes all shiny.
‘My ears hurt,’ Jamie complains, pulling a face. ‘She sure took a long time to die.’
I can’t help myself, I giggle. I mean, she did drag that bit out, in fairness. Ten minutes on the ground, singing that last death song.
‘Can we go now? I’m hungry,’ Jamie is pulling at Mam and Dad’s arms, dragging them towards the exit.
‘I take back all my moaning about queuing for tickets. It was worth the wait. Pretty incredible, in fact. And Jamie, well done, buddy, on keeping quiet,’ Dad says.
‘Where else can you watch a world-class opera for less that ten euros?’ Mam remarks. ‘The hairs were standing on the back of my neck, it was so electrifying!’
‘It was kinda cool to watch it from the back. Didn’t feel like the cheap seats at all,’ I add.
‘Can I have a treat because I was so quiet?’ Jamie asks, never missing a trick.
‘How about we find a café and some Viennese cake to put a smile back on your face?’ Dad says to him.
We find one opposite the theatre and get a table within minutes. ‘I just want to check in with Ann and Luke, okay?’ I say, hooking up to the free Wi-Fi in the café. I peek through my fringe to see if Mam and Dad are making faces at each other. Yep, there they go again, throwing their eyes up to the heavens.
I wouldn’t mind, but I’m hardly ever getting to chat to Ann or Luke any more. I haven’t had a chance yet all day because we’ve done so much sightseeing. I’m banjoed with all the walking. Wrecked. We walked the major tourist attractions along the outer ring road. It’s all right for Jamie, he gets to go on Dad’s shoulders when he gets tired.
I take a picture of the sweet pastries and cakes that arrive to the table. They look amazing and I ping the picture over to Ann.
AnnMurphy: You’ve been so quiet!
EvieGuinness: Soz. Been crazy busy, no Wi-Fi!
AnnMurphy: Where are you now? I can’t keep up any more.
EvieGuinness: In Vienna. Went to the opera. Pretty cool. Any news?
AnnMurphy: Dropped Mam’s phone and it managed to break into a million pieces. She went crae crae. Awkward! And speaking of crae crae, did you see Deirdre’s Facebook post?
EvieGuinness: No? I’m not friends any more, remember?
AnnMurphy: She’s off her head, that one. I only stay as friends for the comedy element. She posted – wait for it – ‘all I want this summer is to find a Romeo and Juliet relationship. Is that too much to ask for? #Sigh.’
EvieGuinness: Not sure she has seen that movie! Who wants to be Juliet? Sure she’s dead by the end of it!
AnnMurphy: With a dead boyfriend. Nevermind #sigh, #gobshite more like!
EvieGuinness: For sure! Soz, I’ve gotta go. Mam is giving me the evils. Will try chat later.
AnnMurphy: Hugz
EvieGuinness: Hugz
‘What are you smiling about?’ Mam asks.
‘Ann,’ I say.
‘What did she say?’
‘Nothing.’
‘Well, I’m glad that nothing makes you so happy. Eat up while you do that, though,’ Mam nags.
I take a big bite just to keep her quiet. It’s gorgeous, so I stuff the lot into my mouth quickly so I can get back to writing a message to Luke. He’s not online, but there’s a message from him earlier.
LukeKavanagh: I’ve been looking at Google maps, trying to follow your journey through Austria. Looks really cool. Wish I was there with you. Still crap here. I’m going to stay with Mam for a few days, she’s settled into her new house now. Dad is still moping. He’s not shaved for nearly two weeks and is beginning to look like Colm McGregor’s dad. Are you having fun? I miss you.
I can’t imagine what it’s like for him. He’s being passed back and forwards between his parents every couple of days. It’s not fair. It’s also my worst nightmare. I look up at my parents, who are at this moment feeding bits of their cake to each other. And while it’s gross to look at, I can’t stop smiling. They’ve not had a row for ages. No more whisper-fighting.
EvieGuinness: I miss you Luke. So much. But I can’t believe I’m saying this, yes, I am having a great time. I hate Nomad and I love Nomad all at once, which I know sounds bonkers. Miss having my own room so bad. Jamie is driving me nuts. But earlier today we saw this guy stop in the middle of the street, open up his suitcase and strip down to his boxers, then change his clothes in front of the world. Not a bother on him. So funny, Dad kept shouting at us to look away and Jamie was shouting that he could see yer man’s willy. We’re going dancing now. Shoot me now!
‘Say goodbye,’ Mam says. ‘Time to get to Pallavicini Palace for our dance class.’
As we walk along, I keep checking my phone to see if he’s back online, but there’s no sign of him. I daydream about him surprising me and turning up at the palace and dancing with me, like we’re a real prince and princess. And even though I know it’s not going to happen, I still feel a little bit disappointed not to see him sitting on the steps when we arrive.
Dad turns to me with a big serious head on him. What have I done now? I stuff my phone in my jeans pocket quickly, before he starts lecturing me.
‘Don’t take this for granted, Evie. You’re about to have a Viennese waltz lesson, in Vienna, in an actual palace. Do you have any idea how lucky we are?’
‘I know, Dad,’ I say and he looks like he’s about to say something else. But Mam gives him one of her looks and he shuts up. Jeez, relax already. He’s so uptight sometimes.
When we enter the lobby, Mam opens her backpack and pulls out two folded shirts, giving them to Dad. ‘I bought these for you and Jamie. We are in a palace, after all! See you back here in ten minutes. Come on, Evie, time to beautify ourselves.’
Then she grabs me by my hand and pulls me into the ladies. She’s off her head if she thinks I’m taking off my jeans and Converse trainers.
‘I don’t do dresses, Mam, you know that,’ I say, when she hands me a bag.
‘You don’t have to do dresses every day. But sometimes you have to dress for an occasion. And this is one of them. Remember for one moment what it felt like when you were a little girl, reading your Disney princess books. You wished you could be Cinderella and go to the ball,’ Mam is insistent.
I shrug. I suppose she’s right. The odd time I did wish I was Cinderella.
‘Well, today, we get the chance to learn something new. In a palace. Just like Cinders. So whether you like it or not, we’re wearing a dress. And Evie, honest to goodness, would you just enjoy the moment? You might surprise yourself and have a good time.’
‘Okay already.’ I take the bag and go into one of the cubicles. I’m nearly afraid to look at the monstrosity she’s bought me. If it’s a pink dress, I’ll scream. But it’s actually nice – pale blue with tiny grey and white butterflies all over it. I shrug off my jeans and t-shirt and pull it on.
‘It fits!’ Mam sighs when I walk out. ‘You have to take off your Converse. Put the kitten heels on. Please. For me …’
This has to be the lamest thing I’ll ever do, but I figure I better do it. And, despite myself, I want to see what it all looks like in the end. Mam is wearing a bright-yellow dress, similar in style to mine. And she’s got her heels on. She looks really pretty.
‘Right, let’s sort our hair out and then we are good to go,’ Mam comes over and, before I have a chance to complain, she’s pulled my hair out of its ponytail and let it fall loose over my shoulders. She grabs a couple of pins and clips back parts of it, leaving some soft tendrils at the side.
When she turns me around to face the mirror, I don’t recognise the person staring back at me. I don’t look like me. I look … pretty.
‘Beautiful. I knew that colour would just suit you so much,’ Mam says and dabs some lipgloss on. ‘You are so lucky, you’ve got the most beautiful skin. It tans a lovely shade of golden brown. Not a single blemish, either. When I was your age, I was covered in spots!’
‘Can I try some of that?’ I ask, wondering what it would feel like to wear lipgloss.
And Mam laughs out loud, clearly delighted with that question, pushing her makeup bag towards me. ‘There’s a lovely coral gloss in there, try that one.’
‘It’s a bit like lip balm. Just stickier,’ I say. But I like it and I feel already a more glamorous version of myself.
A few minutes later I follow Mam out. She’s showing off and does a big twirl for Dad and Jamie. The fifties skirt of her dress whips around her legs as she does.
‘Very Grace Kelly,’ Dad says and I say a quick prayer that he doesn’t grab her and start kissing her again.
‘Wait till you see our daughter,’ Mam replies, then she grabs me and shoves me in front of Dad and Jamie.
I’m mortified and refuse to look up.
‘Hey, you look beautiful, darling,’ Dad says. ‘When did you get so tall?’
He looks all weird and then they both start staring at me. I’m scarlet.
‘I don’t know if I can walk in these shoes,’ I say.
‘You don’t need to walk, Evie, just dance,’ Dad replies, grinning. ‘And at a guess, even with those on, you’ll do better than your old man. Two left feet me.’
Jamie walks over to me then, and says, ‘Are you my date? Dad made me wear this. I can’t breathe,’ he tugs at his buttoned collar.
I giggle, he’s so overdramatic. ‘Yes, I think I am. You look handsome, little bro.’
‘You look like a Barbie doll,’ Jamie tells me and I giggle again because I think if you’d told me this morning that anyone would ever compare me to one of those, I would have said, yeah right, pigs, flying right now.
‘You have to save a dance for me,’ Dad says. ‘I don’t know, one minute you’re a little girl climbing on my shoulders looking for a carry and now here you are, standing before me, on the brink of becoming a woman.’
Mam takes out her phone and snaps some pics of us all.
‘Wow. Come here Evie, look at this photograph of you and Jamie.’
I’m looking down at Jamie and we’re both laughing. Is that really me? I look alright. Pretty, even.
‘That right there is your new profile pic,’ Mam declares. ‘Shall we?’ She holds out her hand to Jamie and Dad offers his arm to me. I look around to make sure no one is watching. I mean, it’s just mortifying. But at the same time, I kinda like it too. Maybe Mam is right, I need to smile a bit more. I’ve been spending so long expecting things to be horrible, I’ve forgotten what it’s like to just enjoy the moment.
Plus, it’s probably safer if I let him help me walk in. Seriously, how does Mam walk in heels every day in work? I feel like a new-born Bambi standing for the first time on ice.
Madame Stella, our tutor, is a tiny woman, wearing a long black skirt and tight black polo jumper. She holds a cane in her hand and even though it’s unlikely, I’m kind of terrified she’s going to rap it off the back of my legs.
‘I hope she’s not planning on using that on us!’ I whisper to Dad.
‘Good afternoon. Welcome,’ she says. Oh, she’s English. I wasn’t expecting that. And then she smiles and she doesn’t look so scary any more.
‘Hello,’ we all chorus.
‘Don’t look so scared. We are going to have some fun, I promise you!’ She turns to Jamie. ‘First of all, let me tell you a little background. It’s over two hundred years since the Viennese Waltz came to international fame. At that time, Strauss melodies filled ballrooms all over Austria and the city danced the night away.’
Madame walks over to me then, ‘The city was like a Fred and Ginger movie, with ballgowns and black-tie suits.’
‘What’s a Fred and Ginger?’ Jamie asks.
‘I think it’s a brand of ice-cream,’ I tell him. I’m confused, but I’ll look it up later tonight to find out what she meant.
‘Sshh,’ Mam hisses.
‘And today, we will learn the basic pattern of steps,’ Madame tells us. ‘Come, come.’
We soon learn what the cane is for, as she uses it to stomp the beat on the floor.
1-2-3. Step-side-close. 1-2-3. Step-side-close. 1-2-3. Step-side-close. 1-2-3. Step-side-close. Step-side-close. 1-2-3.
We all swirl round and round, trying to look like we know what we’re doing. Jamie proves to have natural rhythm and follows the beat with ease. How does he do that? It takes the rest of us a little bit longer to master the moves to the three-quarter time.
I get the three basic steps quick enough, but fecking hell, putting them together with speed is the tricky part. I keep standing on Dad’s toes but he doesn’t seem to mind.
‘I feel like I’m in a Jane Austen novel,’ Mam whispers to us when we stop for a break. Her face is flushed from exertion.
‘I’m not sure Mr Darcy was sweating buckets like I am,’ Dad jokes.
Then Dad starts to dance with Mam and I’m with Jamie. And we’re all moving around the floor, by the end of the hour, with some level of fluidity.
I also realise that I’m enjoying myself because when Madame declares the lesson over, I’m a little disappointed. But then she tells us of the annual formal balls and Dad whispers to me, ‘I’m going to surprise your mother and bring her back here for a weekend one day. So she can experience her full Jane Austen experience and go to an actual ball.’
I reach up and give him a hug.
‘What’s that for?’ he asks, clearly bemused. I suppose I don’t do that much any more.
‘I don’t want you and Mam to split up and live in different places, like Luke’s parents. So I’m glad you want to take Mam away for a holiday. She’ll like that, Dad. And I can take care of Jamie.’
Dad looks at me and places his hands on my shoulders. ‘Do you trust me?’
I nod.
‘Well, trust me when I tell you this. I’ve no intention of ever leaving your mam. I promise.’
I’ve never felt more relieved in my life. Hearing him confirm what I’ve been hoping for makes me want to run back inside the ballroom and skip around the floor.
We all head back to the campsite and Dad starts to fire up the barbecue.
‘Can I go see if Lulu is around?’ I ask. ‘I told her yesterday I’d show her some of my Guinness Book of Records albums.’ I’ve started to check out the records for each place we visit. And there are some seriously cool ones.
‘Tell you what, why don’t you ask them if they want to join us for a burger?’ Mam says. ‘We’ve loads of food in. Plenty to go around.’
‘Are you sure?’ Judith asks, walking over to Nomad with me. ‘Wow, don’t you all look fancy!’
‘We’ve been dancing,’ Dad says. ‘Just call me Fred.’
‘And of course we are sure,’ Mam says. ‘The more the merrier! We leave here tomorrow; we’d love to spend our last night with you all.’
‘Awesome. I’ll make some salads,’ Lorna tells us. ‘And we’ve got wine!’
‘Great! I’m about to open a bottle here. Hate drinking alone, don’t we, Olly?’ Mam smiles as she places glasses on the table.
I think about that barbecue in Ireland a year ago, just before everything went wrong. I was so scared that I’d have to cling onto that memory as the last happy Guinness family moment. But I was wrong. We’ve had lots of fun moments since then, but right now I think this is my favourite.
Mam and Dad, standing side by side at the barbecue. He’s laughing at something she said and he puts his arm around her shoulder. Jamie is playing with a robot and is running around Nomad in circles. And then Judith, Lorna and Lulu arrive and I realise how lucky I am that I’m here. In Austria. Making new friends. In a camper van with my crazy family, who I love and who love me.
And I realise that the feeling in my head, that buzzing, that tightness, like I was about to explode, has been gone for a while now.