It wasn’t quite the roar of a lion, and it wasn’t exactly the rasp of an electric saw, and you wouldn’t have mistaken it for the slobbering of a huge dog, but there was a bit of all three in the terrible noise that was coming along the corridor.

Something heavy was being dragged along. Something that didn’t like being dragged along and was going to make sure that everyone had got that loud and clear.

The Codcakers all knew that this must be The Beast. They didn’t know what kind of beast it was, but they were all sure that they were going to find out far, far too soon, and that when they did they would wish they hadn’t.

Four guards staggered into the hall, grunting and sweating as they hauled an iron cage on wheels behind them.

The creature inside the cage was nowhere near as small as a lion. Its teeth were far less blunt than an electric saw. Its drooling jaws were not as dry as a slobbering dog. And as for its appearance…it wasn’t just the mean look in its bloodshot yellow eyes, the greasy green fur that hung in matted clumps like a filthy rug, the black tongue that lolled out of its slack slavering jaws, the torn and dirty claws sticking out of its huge front paws, or the crust of snot around its scaly snout. No, it was the way that all of these combined that made it so hideous.

That, and the farting.

The Beast, whatever it was, was a thing that only its own mother could love. And even she would have needed to be half-blind and to have lost her sense of smell.

A waft of old cabbage and bad eggs spread through the room.

“And he said we smelled bad,” said Eddy.

“Behold!” the Emperor shouted. “The mighty Beast! Has it been fed?”

A man in a zookeeper’s uniform with a black hood over his head stepped out from behind the cage.

“Not since yesterday, Majesty.”

“Excellent – hang on, are you the zookeeper or the executioner?”

“Both, Majesty. You fired the previous pair.”

“Oh, yes. They were useless,” said the Emperor. “So it must be hungry.”

“It’s very rude to talk about me like I’m not here,” said the Beast, in a sulky voice. “I can speak for myself.”

“From both ends, unfortunately,” said the Emperor. “Beast, are you hungry?”

“Might be,” said the Beast. “Depends.”

“On what?”

“Don’t know.”

“Is something wrong with it, Keepercutioner? I mean, Exezootioner?” said the Emperor. “It seems very moody.”

“It’s at a difficult age,” said the Exezootioner.

“You’re doing it again,” grumped the Beast.

“Put the cage in position,” the Emperor commanded.

The guards pushed the Beast’s cage up to the Codcakers’ cell, with their doors in line.

“Vive la Résistance!” squeaked the Chevalier. “You may kill our bodies, but you will never kill our spirit!”

“The bodies are quite enough for me, thank you,” replied the Emperor. “Guards – release the Beast!”

The guards raised the door on the Beast’s cage. All that stood between the Codcakers and the terrible jaws of the farting Beast was the door of their own cell. And the guards were already lifting the catch that held it in place.

Eddy could feel his heart thumping as if it was trying to break out of his chest.

“Goodbye, Captain,” said the Crew. “It has been an honour to serve with you. I’d like to say it has been a pleasure as well, but in the circumstances that would be idiotic.”

“I’m sorry,” said the Captain quietly. “Our story wasn’t meant to end like this.”

The prisoners huddled together as the cell door slid aside. The Beast lifted its broad bottom, let out an enormous blast of wind, and shambled towards them. They could smell its hot breath, as fragrant as a roasted dustbin. The Beast loomed over them, its jaws dripping.

Eddy pressed himself tight against the Captain. He felt a hand grasp his and squeeze it hard. His body was jangling with energy, yelling at him to run away. But he was caught in the cell, with nowhere to go.

It was all wrong. He shouldn’t be here. He should be on holiday with his parents. His stupid parents who were always too busy. He thought of his dad and that way he always hogged the TV remote. And his mum, who still pulled his socks up like he was a toddler. His mum. She would never even know what had happened to him.

“Mum,” he said quietly.

Eddy closed his eyes and waited for the snap of jaws. The chomp of teeth. He hoped it would all be over quickly. Please let it be over quickly.