“WE HAVE NO FEARS”: VIRGINIA, NOVEMBER 1863

Walter H. Taylor to Bettie Saunders

In the last week of September two corps from the Army of the Potomac were sent west to reinforce Rosecrans, leaving Meade with about 75,000 men camped around Culpeper, Virginia. Although the detachment of Longstreet and his two divisions had left him with only 45,000 men, Lee decided to take the offensive. Starting on October 9, Lee’s army marched west and then north, turning Meade’s right flank and causing him to withdraw along the Orange & Alexandria railroad to Centreville, forty miles to the north of Culpeper. On October 14 A. P. Hill lost more than 1,300 men killed, wounded, or captured in a battle with the Union rear guard at Bristoe Station, ending Confederate hopes of cutting off the Union retreat. Unable to supply his army near Centreville, Lee turned south on October 18 and withdrew behind the Rappahannock. On November 7 a Union night attack overran the Confederate bridgehead at Rappahannock Station, capturing 1,600 prisoners. Lee then retreated across the Rapidan, and by November 10 the two armies had returned to their previous positions. Major Walter H. Taylor, Lee’s adjutant, wrote to his fiancée after the campaign ended.

Camp near Orange CHo

15 November 1863

For the first time I think since the commencement of the war Sunday has come upon me unawares. I had persuaded myself that it was to come on the 16th of the month and all day yesterday and this morning I have imagined that this was Saturday & contemplated writing you a letter tonight as usual. When George Peterkin came in just now and asked me if there was any objection to his going to attend service in Orange, I was highly entertained at his having, as I thought, gained a day. How I made such a mistake I cannot tell. As the roar of artillery is again heard this morning, I hasten whilst time is left me to acknowledge the receipt of yours of last Sunday and to thank you my dear Bettie, for all that it contains. I cannot tell you how anxiously I watch the mails when the time arrives when I think I may reasonably expect a letter. When there is none, I bear my disappointment like a Trojan and patiently await another day. And when the earnestly longed for favor makes its appearance I almost tremble with delight. Oh Bettie, my precious one, your letters are very dear to me. When I read them, I am almost transported with joy to see that you are my own truly my own. My happiness is almost too great when I perceive that you too look forward to our future with anticipations of a happy life together. When we shall be all in all to each other. When I shall study and labor, oh! so earnestly and faithfully to secure your comfort and happiness. Hitherto, dear Bettie, my devotion for you has struggled alone under most adverse circumstances, it could not develop itself because it was unrequited: ’twas not encouraged; but now that it meets with reciprocal sentiment on your part, now that I can properly remove the restraint which I always imposed upon it, it assumes mammoth proportions, it absorbs my whole being. Did I not feel very secure, yes, did I not recognize the kind hand of Providence in bringing us thus together finally after my many hopes, fears and prayers, I should tremble indeed when I realize how entirely dependent I am upon you; when I have to confess that you are all to me, light, life, everything. . . .

But little of importance has occurred in the army since my letter or note of last Saturday. From the papers, you have no doubt learned of our movement to the south side of the Rapidan. Contrary to my expectations the enemy was very tardy in pushing his advantage, after our misfortune at Rappanhannock Station. Soon after my note to you was dispatched, we struck tents, packed the wagons and sent them to the rear—only moving ourselves about twelve o’clock. Before leaving our camp we built the most immense fires in all our new chimneys, to show how nicely they would draw; and wrapped in my overcoat, I stretched out in front of mine upon a pile of straw and soon lost consciousness in a sweet sleep. I was presently awakened by an exclamation from the General addressed to those around to the effect that Major Taylor was a happy fellow, meaning that I could sleep, whether circumstances were propitious or the reverse, at any time. After the chimneys themselves, as well as the wood in the fire places, were consumed, for we were determined the Yankees should not reap the profits of our industry and skill, we commenced our march for the point where it had been arranged HdQtrs should be established for the anticipated engagement. So soon as we arrived there, it being yet some hours before day, the “happy fellow” again composed himself to sleep and awoke about day with a thought of his absent dear one and ready for Meade or “the newest fashions”—(Pray excuse the slang).

But the Yankees were apparently satisfied; at all events evinced no desire to bring on a general engagement and permitted us to remain in line of battle all day Sunday without any serious molestation. Sunday night, in pursuance of the original design of the General, we resumed our march for the Rapidan and encamped on the south side of that river that night. A day or two afterwards we changed camp to our present location—one much nearer Orange CHo. more central to the army and more convenient to all parties. It is a camp of my selection and I am pleased to see it gives general satisfaction. I hope we may have as nice a one for the winter, if we do not remain where we are.

When the thundering of the artillery commenced this morning, a message was received that the enemy was attempting a passage of the river at one of the lower fords; the whole army was at once signaled to be under arms and ready for battle and the General, with all the Staff save me, started for the front. I was left to attend to whatever should arrive in the General’s absence, and was to follow when convinced there was really to be a battle and when there was no longer any necessity for my remaining at HeadQtrs. So I have had a nice quiet time to write and what is the best part of it, I have been relieved of all anxiety about the threatened battle, by the receipt of a signal message informing Genl. Lee that the movement was only a cavalry demonstration. So there will be no fight today. When it does come we have no fears as to the result. Don’t you mind what you hear in Richmond, wait for my letters, I will always, when it is possible, keep you promptly advised of what is transpiring here. It is needless for me to admonish you as I did Mother yesterday, not to follow and put faith in Dame Rumor, and to deviate from the fashion in the capital, always wear a cheerful, hopeful countenance. Above all, don’t wound our pride by feeling any apprehension on our account. Don’t imagine that the enemy are to have it all their own way. Our confidence in God and our own strong arms is by no means impaired, and it is not flattering to see our good people doubtful of our ability to manage our old enemy, so often fairly beaten by this army. You ask if there is any prospect of our falling back to Richmond. I see none now. The enemy, I trust, will never force us back so far. I cannot say what we may be compelled to do through a want of forage for our animals; this depends on the departments in Richmond. Personally I would be gratified to be so near you; but with you I think of the country which would be laid open to the enemy and the people who would be exposed to their tyranny and I pray we may never relinquish again so much of the Old Commonwealth. I only wish the General had good Lieutenants. We miss Jackson & Longstreet terribly. Poor Ewell—a cripple—is now laid up and not able to be in the field. . . .

I was very sorry to hear of Mayhew Hobson’s death. Poor Mrs. H.—she looked so comfortable and happy when I saw her at home. When I thought how happily fixed the three brothers were, with their beautiful homes, I little dreamed how soon one would be taken away. I received a letter for Mr. John H. a few days ago, enclosed to my care from Pemberton. It was post marked 9th & reached here on the 12th. I presumed it was about his brother and sent it over by a special courier. Mr. Hobson had just been to Stuart’s HdQ. to try and get a leave of absence and there learned of his brother’s death. I am sorry that he cannot go home now, but Genl. Stuart tells me there is but one Lieut. with his Co. Apart from this, which would preclude any merriment at the Neck so soon as Christmas, I very much fear that my chances for a leave so recently after my last are quite poor. But I can ride to Goochland in a day and when you go there, I shall certainly do likewise if practicable, and if my stay must be limited to one day. Our Staff is very small now and is growing smaller. Two of them, I know, will expect to visit their families next month. This leaves but one other besides me. I expect to lose my tent mate Venable. He is the only congenial spirit I have here, and I shall miss him very much. He is a great friend of Col Preston’s and the latter wished him to take a place with increased rank in the Conscription Bureau. I think he will take it. He has a wife and two children & has seen 3 years field service. He consulted me and I advised him to go. The truth is Genl. Lee doesn’t make our time pleasant here & when promotion is offered his staff elsewhere, it is not to be wondered at if they accept the offer. Don’t say anything of this as Venable has told no one else. As for my promotion, please don’t expect it; for I shall feel badly if you think I should advance and I do not. I only care for it on your account but Genl. Lee will not push us up tho every body else goes. I have given over all expectation of being more than a Major—certainly as long as his say governs the matter.

I heard from Frank Huger a few days since. He had just received a letter from Fanny Kerr. Said she was well but not in good spirits. I don’t wonder at it, she must have written about the time of Dr. Wright’s execution. He tells me Fanny wishes to know if certain rumors regarding you and me are true. He seconded her in her request for information. I think my reply should have satisfied you. Tell Mrs. Jack Preston (that is if you choose) that when her husband applies for leave of absence I will be faithful to my promise & help him. His application the other day was to join Genl. Hampton under orders—that is on duty, & as Genl. H. was then en route to the army, it was not proper that the Major should go. My love to all at the Neck; to Pattie & Maria & Mrs Petty. Are my letters too long? Goodbye. God bless you. All is quiet now. Your W. I am glad to say there has been a change of opinion, as regards the person most responsible for the Bristoe Station misfortune. Genl. Heth is not so much blamed. I intended mentioning this before.

Walter