Two

The street is somehow more crowded than two hours earlier, though it must be close to eleven. Jenny and I hook arms as we weave in and around standstill traffic. The address Jaewoo sent is for a restaurant down the street. A glance at the menu behind the window shows that it serves mainly hansik, traditional Korean food.

Two blocks down, a large crowd of people gather outside another restaurant, though they don’t appear to be waiting to go inside. Then I spot the van parked at the curb. XOXO’s crew and backup dancers must be eating at that restaurant to divert attention away from the actual location of the members.

A few fans look over, passing over Jenny and lingering on me. I pull my coat tighter around me.

“Jaewoo says there’s a side entrance to the restaurant,” Jenny says. We round the building into a short alley with a single dumpster. There’s a mildly distressing streak across the wall that could be either old paint or blood.

“As far as New York City alleys go, this isn’t that bad,” Jenny says.

“Well, as long as we’re murdered in a ‘not that bad’ alley.” I raise my bag in front of me, the clasp facing out.

“I hope this is the right door.” It doesn’t budge when Jenny tries the handle. Stepping back, she brings her phone to her ear. “I’m outside,” she says.

From inside there comes the sound of rushing steps, then the door bursts open.

“Jenny!” Jaewoo says, breathless. His hair is longer for this comeback and it slips rakishly over his eyes. He slowly lowers his phone from his ear, his gaze never leaving Jenny.

I wait for her to rush forward, but she remains unmoving. A glance at her face shows she’s . . . blushing. Is she being shy? How annoying. I shove her from behind and she stumbles into Jaewoo’s arms.

While they’re canoodling, I check the alley to make sure we haven’t been followed, then step through the door, shutting it behind me.

We’re in a service stairwell, with crates stacked against the wall to the right. On the left, concrete stairs lead upward. I catch sight of Ji Seok at the top. He nods to me before turning his face away, respectful of the couple’s privacy. I sigh. What have I become that I relate most to XOXO’s manager?

“Min Sori, it’s been a while.” Jaewoo holds out an arm and I step into his embrace. It seems not that long ago we were the same height, and now he’s tall enough to rest his head briefly on the top of mine before releasing me.

“Tonight was supposed to be my night with Jenny,” I say, stepping back. “I’ll never forgive you.” I’m only half joking.

He matches my serious tone. “I owe you a life debt.” Then he breaks into that boyish grin that has set aflutter the hearts of fans the world over. “Are you two hungry? Let’s go to the room.” He herds us up the stairs, where Ji Seok bows to Jenny and me.

“Look at what Sori got me,” Jenny says, showing Jaewoo the contents of the shopping bag.

“I’m surprised she didn’t get you a stuffed animal.” He laughs.

“I knew you were in New York City,” Ji Seok says from where he walks beside me, “but I didn’t think we’d see you.”

Though the XOXO members and I are contracted to the same company, there’s no reason for our schedules to overlap. Our lives are entirely separate. I wonder, briefly, if he’ll tell my mother about this meeting but quickly dismiss the thought—Ji Seok might be employed by Joah, but his loyalty is to the members.

Through a side door, we enter a long hallway lined on either side with private rooms. As we approach the largest one at the end, my palms start to sweat. I bury them deep into the pockets of my coat.

Because of the tour, and the time I spent in Singapore, it’s been the longest I’ve gone without seeing Nathaniel since we graduated from the academy. The months immediately following the breakup had been . . . difficult. We’d started dating in secret when we were both sixteen, before Nathaniel had debuted. But soon after, a photo of us was leaked to the public, leading to a scandal that almost ruined the boys’ careers. With the insistence of the higher ups, my mother included, we mutually decided to break it off.

It was clearly the right decision. XOXO went on to become one of the biggest idol groups in the world, and even if I’m not quite at that level, I have a future in the industry, should I choose to pursue one, which wouldn’t have been the case had Nathaniel and I stayed together.

As we approach the door to the room, I take a deep breath. Though those first few months after the breakup were hard, we did manage to graduate high school as friends. After all, we were friends before we got together.

There’s no reason to be nervous now. Nerves suggest there are still feelings there and that can’t be possible. Because if I’m still in love with Nathaniel Lee of XOXO, then breaking up with him might possibly have been the worst decision of my life.

Jaewoo slides the door open. I register a room with a wooden dining table inset with charcoal grills. It’s bordered by upholstered chairs on one side and a booth on the other.

“Min Sori?” The deep voice draws my attention to the corner of the booth where Sun, XOXO’s leader, leans casually against the wall. “This is unexpected.”

He’s dressed in a loose shirt, his long hair pulled back from his striking face. Jenny says Sun looks like a supervillain in a video game, but I always thought he looked more like someone who should have been a prince during the Joseon dynasty.

“Sun-oppa,” I say. While Jaewoo, Nathaniel, and I trained together at Joah, I’ve known Sun the longest. As the grandson of the president of TK Group, we’ve been thrown together at enough banquets to last a lifetime. “I was having dinner with Jenny when Jaewoo called.”

“I see,” he says. I feel more at ease after this short interaction with Sun. I’ve known all of the members since we were in middle school. Yes, we’re all older now, but there’s no reason to treat any of them differently.

Sun’s gaze shifts to someone behind me, and the back of my neck prickles, like a spark of electricity against my skin.

“Sori.” His voice. “Why does it take crossing the whole world to see you?”

I school my features before turning around.

When I lift my eyes to meet Nathaniel’s dark-eyed gaze, my stomach flutters.

I know that it’s close to midnight and he’s coming off two nights of concerts in New York City, but he looks indecent, as if he’d just stumbled out of bed. His hair is dyed a dark blue for this cycle of promotions, and strands of it fall across his brow.

“You can see me any time,” I say, tucking my hair behind one ear. It’s a nervous tic of mine, but I need to do something with my hands. “We live in the same city.”

His eyes move from my ear—where he’d followed the movement—before returning to my face, an odd expression flitting over his features.

It’s gone in a flash as his attention shifts to Jenny, who’s finished greeting Sun. “Yo, Jenny Go.” His whole demeanor changes, that famous dimple of his deepening. “Have you no shame? Crashing our dinner outing.”

“Of all the cuisines to choose from in New York City, you go to a Korean restaurant.” She matches his teasing tone. “Aren’t you flying back to Seoul in a few days?”

“What can I say?” He lifts his hands in a helpless gesture. “Koreans will always find a Korean restaurant, no matter what country we’re in.”

“I like the hair.”

“The concept was classy gangster. An oxymoron, don’t you think?”

“Not if you’re Won Bin,” she says, referencing Ajeossi, her favorite film of all time.

“His character wasn’t a gangster, Jenny,” Nathaniel drawls. “He was ex–special forces.”

“Same thing.” Jenny shrugs.

“No, it’s not!”

My head has been whipping back and forth between them as they’ve been speaking in rapid-fire English, my chest tightening with every second that goes by.

Jaewoo inserts his body between them, grabbing Jenny’s hand. “Let’s not remind Jenny of her celebrity crushes.”

She slides into the booth next to Jaewoo, while Nathaniel falls easily into the seat opposite her. “Do you count?” he quips.

Ji Seok sits across from Sun, which leaves me the middle seat, beside Nathaniel.

“Where’s Choi Youngmin?” I switch the conversation back to Korean. Jenny had said all the members would be here, and yet there’s no sign of XOXO’s maknae.

“He has schoolwork, so he went back to the hotel,” Jaewoo answers. I’d forgotten that XOXO’s youngest member was still in high school.

“That’ll be you soon,” Sun says, picking up the glass of beer in front of him. I’m surprised to see him drinking, since we’re in the United States, before I remember that he recently turned twenty-one. Then I realize who he’s speaking to.

I turn toward Nathaniel. “You’re taking a class?”

“You sound surprised.”

I always thought that if any of the XOXO members pursued a higher education, it would be Jaewoo, who had the best grades in high school.

“It’s unexpected,” I say. Nathaniel—who’d been reaching his hand out toward his water glass—goes still. I realize, too late, how this must sound, that my expectations of him are so low, I’d find it completely shocking that he’d take university courses. “You never liked studying,” I finish softly.

He continues forward and picks up the glass. “People change.” Bringing it to his lips, he takes a long drink of water.

I’ve upset him. I know I have, without him having to say it, his shoulders hunched slightly forward. I want to ask him what he’s studying but I feel like I lost the right. With my chopsticks, I pick up a single black bean, plopping it into my mouth.

“So you’re here for fashion week?” Ji Seok asks, oblivious to the awkwardness between Nathaniel and me. “Have you explored the city at all? It’s your first time here, right?”

At this, Jaewoo lifts his head, glancing at me from across the table. Ji Seok became the boys’ manager after that summer I spent in New York with Jaewoo and Nathaniel.

“I’ve been busy with shows. I haven’t had time to do anything else,” I say, answering his first two questions.

“Sori’s not impulsive,” Nathaniel says. “Not like Jenny.”

My cheeks, which were already warm from the previous interaction, grow even hotter. What is that supposed to mean?

Jenny frowns. “How am I impulsive?”

“You moved to Korea to chase after Jaewoo.”

“Wow,” Jenny says dryly, “I can’t even begin to wrap my head around how untrue that statement is.”

A knock at the door interrupts them. A woman I’ve never seen before walks into the room.

Ji Seok transforms into manager mode, standing up from his chair to block the woman. “Can I help you?”

She moves to peer around him. “I was in the VIP box earlier. My name is Jeon Sojin. I’m the daughter of CEO Jeon of Hankook Electric.” She doesn’t have to explain herself further. Hankook Electric is a major shareholder of Joah Entertainment.

Ji Seok hesitates—and in that short second, it’s like I can see a half dozen thoughts flit through his head—then he bows. Sun’s gaze meets mine, both of us registering an irrefutable truth. XOXO can’t afford to offend CEO Jeon’s daughter.

Rising to his feet, Sun bows to her. “Please, won’t you join us?”

The other members of XOXO take their cues from their leader, standing to bow as well. Jenny frowns, probably confused as to why we’re indulging this rude woman who’d interrupted our dinner. But situations like this happen all the time in our industry. We have to please people with power, whose influence could benefit the company, or, if they take offense, prove catastrophic.

Sojin gestures for a server to pull up a chair beside Nathaniel, then accepts a bottle of soju and two shot glasses from another, having apparently ordered the alcohol beforehand. “You’re a hard one to get a hold of. I sent gifts to your company, expensive gifts, and you’ve never worn them or replied with a message.” It’s clear she’s not a fan of XOXO so much as inappropriately interested in Nathaniel. “Don’t I merit a bit of gratitude?”

“Thanks,” Nathaniel deadpans. Beside me, Ji Seok winces at his tone, which isn’t exactly friendly. Nathaniel also never received those gifts—it’s against company policy to accept anything other than letters from fans.

Sojin’s lips purse. However she imagined this scenario playing out, it probably wasn’t like this, with Nathaniel coldly rejecting her advances.

“Jihyuk-ssi.” Sojin rallies, sliding the bottle and one of the glasses toward Nathaniel. “Let’s share a drink.”

“He’s not old enough,” Ji Seok protests.

“Oh, shush.” She clicks her tongue. “He’s old enough in Korea.”

There’s a loud snort of derision. Everyone freezes, and then all our gazes land on Jenny.

“How dare—?” Sojin bristles, then cuts off.

I realize immediately what Sojin has noticed. Jenny’s sitting close enough to Jaewoo that their shoulders touch. She quickly moves away, but it’s too late. Sojin’s lips peel back in a smirk.

“You go to the Manhattan School of Music?” she asks. It’s an easy deduction to make—the school’s name is emblazoned across the front of Jenny’s hoodie.

“Yes,” Jenny says quietly, her voice unsure. It’s so unlike Jenny that I feel my pulse jump.

“What instrument do you play?” Sojin pries. “I feel like I’ve seen you before. What’s your name?”

Jenny pulls her ball cap lower, hunching her shoulders. Jaewoo’s hand curls into a fist on the table, his eyes narrowing, and I know he’s about to say something he shouldn’t.

“What brings you to New York City?” Nathaniel attempts to draw Sojin’s attention back to him, but she’s zeroed in on Jenny, clearly enjoying how uncomfortable she’s making her.

“You know,” she sneers, “girls like you shouldn’t act so brazen, flaunting yourselves. It’s shameless.”

Something snaps within me, like a firecracker popping off. Jeon Sojin, you want to see shameless?

Shifting straight in my chair, I remove my coat, something I’ve avoided doing until this moment so as not to draw too much attention. That’s not the case now. Sojin’s eyes lock on me, or more specifically, on my bodysuit, which clings to my shoulders and chest. Slowly, I glide my hand across the back of Nathaniel’s chair, letting the very edge of my fingers touch his back. As he turns, his eyes widen slightly.

“You haven’t paid any attention to me all night.” I pout, letting more breath into my voice. Though I never studied seriously to be an actor, I did take acting classes as a trainee. I lower my eyelashes before raising my eyes to meet his. “It’s like I’m not even here.”

Nathaniel, for his part, recovers quickly, taking my cue. His dark eyes never break contact with mine as he says, “I could never forget that you’re here.”

My heart stutters, and I almost lose focus. He’s good at this.

I try to concentrate, hoping that I’ve read Sojin correctly and that her own insecurities, and jealousy, will flare up with how uncomfortable I’m making her feel.

“I’ve missed you,” I whisper, moving my other hand toward his on the table. He doesn’t hesitate, shifting his palm so that it’s facing up. When I place mine over it, he closes his fingers around me, and I feel the warmth of his hand down to my stomach.

I’m glad that it’s him. Here, with me. There’s no one I trust more to pull this off, no one I’d even feel safe enough to try this with. No matter what we are to each other now, we still make a great team.

“I’ve missed you too,” Nathaniel says, but he’s no longer looking at me.

Abruptly, Sojin stands, knocking over the soju bottle. Nathaniel releases my hand to catch it before it spills over the side of the table. “I forgot I have an important business meeting in the morning.” She won’t meet anyone’s eyes. “I’ll excuse myself first.” Before the others can stand to bow, she’s out the door.

I remove my arm the moment she’s gone, slumping in my chair with relief.

“Did you really just intimidate her into leaving?” Jenny says, her voice filled with awe. “Gi Taek would be so proud.”

I laugh. Our classmate from Seoul Arts Academy, Hong Gi Taek, would support my pettier side.

“Very cool, Min Sori,” Jaewoo says, and Sun gives me a thumbs up from the corner.

I’m startled by a sliding sound as Nathaniel pushes back his chair. “I think some of that soju got on me,” he says.

No one seems to notice him leaving, Sun and Jaewoo wondering how Jeon Sojin had found them at the restaurant, and Ji Seok apologizing profusely to Jenny.

When Nathaniel returns, the night continues as if we were never interrupted. Afterward, we exit through the back alley in pairs, with Sun and Ji Seok ahead of Jenny and me, and Jaewoo and Nathaniel bringing up the rear. They’re all decked out in large coats, hats, and masks that would be comical if it wasn’t snowing outside.

I’m hugging Jenny goodbye—I don’t know the next time I’ll see her—when I hear Nathaniel call my name from the street. “Sori.”

He’s flagged down a taxi, holding open the back door. I hurry over. There’s black ice on the curb and I take his outstretched hand. I have the brief impression of his fingers lightly squeezing mine and his voice close to my ear—“Text Jenny when you get to the hotel”—before the door’s shutting and there’s a loud thunk as he hits the top of the taxi. As it moves away from the curb, I turn around in my seat to watch him through the blurry window until he’s swallowed by the lights.