Chapter 6
Winner Takes All, And
I Was Born A Winner
“So where are we headed?” Carl asks as we enter the car. He has been so cold these days. I wonder if he’s finally fed up with the head games that I have been playing all these years or if the wound goes deeper. I have in my possession the only two other things besides myself that Carl would kill for. I do not keep them away from him out of spite or hate. I keep them from him because that is how it has to be. Besides, I’m not even sure if they really belong to him. So, why wake the sleeping monster when life is peaceful while he hibernates?
“Well, since I just got my hair done, maybe you should take me out to lunch.”
He just nods his head and says okay. Days change, but some things will always stay the same.
“So what was that all about?” Tay asked as we headed back home from the restaurant. He had left his car at the restaurant so he could ride with me. His bodyguards would retrieve it later.
“That bitch Shamika had it coming. You saw how she was looking at me. She hated me from the minute I walked into La’ Tre’s. I can’t help that she came in there looking a hot mess.”
Tay’von laughed as if his sides hurt.
I went on. “What in the hell is he doing with her, anyways? Did you see all the things she had on at one time? I hope he knows that he can’t take her anywhere serious.”
As the words came out of my mouth, I started to really think about it. There Black was, a man who could be Common’s twin, and he was with a low-class Keyshia Cole–looking chick.
“I asked him the same thing in the bathroom, and he told me that she has been with him since back in the day. You know, on some street shit,” Tay’von replied.
“Have you ever seen her before?”
“Yeah, but it’s always been in passing,” Tay answered.
“Well, I don’t give a fuck that she was down with him or for how long. That bitch needs a stylist.”
That one sent Tay into a deeper laughing fit. But I wasn’t joking. What was she thinking when she left the house, looking like that?
“Aw, come on, Tangie. Play nice. She didn’t look that bad. Her clothes are crazy, but she has a cute face and a nice body. She just needs help with her presentation. Oh, and by the way, Black asked me to ask you to help her out with that.”
“Help her out with what? That bitch is rude as hell! Plus, she’s a grown-ass woman and should be able to help herself.”
“Come on, baby. Just do it for me. You do know that since you’re going to be out on tour with us, she will be everywhere you are. Do you really want to be seen with her if she’s dressed like that?”
Tay thought that he was so slick, but what he said did have some truth to it.
“Fine. I’ll help her out, but if that bitch says anything nasty to me, I am going to fuck her up.”
Tay’von knew that I meant what I said, so he then said he prayed that Shamika stayed cool. He didn’t want me to put my foot up her ass, which would create tension on an easygoing tour.
* * *
After Tay and I got home, Carl and Tony went back to the restaurant for Tay’s car. I took a nap before the maid came up and helped me pack. By eight the next morning, we were dressed and ready to go out on tour together.
The first stop was Maryland. That was one of my favorite states. It had a vibe to it like no other. I could never get enough of that place. Once in Silver Spring, we checked into the best hotel the city had to offer. As soon as we got settled, the tour manager called the suite and reminded Tay that he had a sound check at six that evening. I sure as hell was not going to any sound check, so I told Tay that I would meet him at the concert. Plus, I had to get my shit together. There were always major players at those things, and you never knew. Maybe I could trade in a used man for a new and better one.
It was around eleven o’clock in the morning, so I called the front desk and asked an attendant to set up an appointment for me at the best spa in town. About five minutes later the attendant called back and told me that the spa that I wanted was booked solid. I asked her for the spa’s number and called it myself. It was the only spa in town that really knew how to take care of black people, and I wasn’t taking no for an answer.
“Hello. Body and Soul. How may I help you?”
I told the woman about the hotel calling for me, said that I needed an appointment for that day, and explained that I just couldn’t wait for them to fit me in.
“Well, we’re sorry, miss. We cannot fit anyone else in today. How about Monday?” Monday? Monday is two days away. That just won’t do.
“Well, how about I let you speak with my boyfriend? I’m sure you will have some room then.”
I took the phone over to Tay, and he knew what was up. I had used him before to get what I wanted. That was the upside of fame. People would kick their own parents out of anywhere just to get you in. All I had to do was put him on the phone. He gave the woman his name and told her to call the hotel back to verify that he was telling her the truth. Once people in service realized that it was really Mr. Too Fine, they always changed their tone. And if they didn’t, he would threaten to tell his celebrity friends how unaccommodating they were. This always worked, as it did that day. By the time he hung up, I had an appointment for a full treatment that day at no cost.
I decided to take a nap before my appointment, so that I would feel my best later on. An hour later, as Tony shook me awake, I heard Tay whisper to him to tell me that he was going out with Carl. By the way Tay said this and then ran out the door, I knew that something was up. But I wasn’t going to say anything. A promise was a promise, so I had to keep my mouth shut. I got up to go to the bathroom and get ready for the spa, but before I took a step, Tony grabbed my arm gently and turned me around.
“Tangie, there’s something that I need to talk to you about.”
Okay, I had to think for a minute. There I was, just waking up, and Tony wanted to talk to me? He hardly ever spoke to me. I wanted to hear this, so I sat down on the bed, with no expression on my face.
“So talk,” I told him, halfway annoyed.
“Nah, you go ahead and get ready. Tay would kill me if you were late tonight just because I wanted to talk to you.”
I didn’t even look at him. I just got up and got ready. I wasn’t going to rush him.
By two o’clock, we were in the car, heading to the spa, and since I didn’t want to seem like I was pressing him, we just drove quietly for ten minutes. It seemed like he was having trouble saying what he wanted to say, so I waited some more.
Finally, he spoke. “Look, I’m not trying to get all up in your business, but are you with Tay ’cause you really like him, or are you just along for the ride?”
“Now, why would you ask me that, Tony?” I asked. I had got caught off guard by his question.
“Well, let me ask you what I really want to ask. Now, just sit back and don’t get mad. Just tell me straight up.”
I kept quiet and smoked my weed, waiting for his question.
“What is going on between you and Carl?”
We were at a stop sign, and I could see him looking at me through the rearview mirror. Tony trying to catch my reaction made me not give him one.
“Carl just watches over me while Tay is gone, and that’s all. Why are you asking me this?”
“Well, that’s the question of the day, isn’t it? Why do I ask? Well, maybe it’s because of that night in Vegas. I saw you mouthing words to Carl—”
I cut him off. “No, you saw me mouthing words to Tay. I was talking shit to my man while fucking him, that’s it. You do remember who my man is, right? You know, the one who pays you?”
I was trying the same shit that I had always used on Carl, but Tony just laughed.
“Damn, baby girl, relax. I’m just telling you what I saw. I have been working with Carl ever since Tay blew up, so I know him as well as I know the back of my hand. I know when something is up.”
“Well, if you really do know him that well, then you wouldn’t be sitting in this car, asking me these questions. You would already know the answers.”
“Well, how do you know that I didn’t ask Carl and that he didn’t tell me the truth about you two? Maybe I am just asking you as the icing on the cake.”
“Look, Tony, I am with Tay, not with you or Carl. So let me just make it clear. My pussy belongs to me, and I can give it to whomever I please. So don’t ever ask me about who I am fucking again. If it’s not you, then it’s none of your business.”
“Did you ever stop to think that maybe that house has cameras? How do you know that everything you have done in that house isn’t on a tape somewhere?”
My heart skipped a beat, but I didn’t show it. “If there was a tape, then you wouldn’t be asking me this, because you would already know that there is nothing between Carl and me. So just shut the fuck up and drive.”
Tony just kept on laughing, and that was making my stomach do flips. I was going to end up feeling sick for the rest of the day. What would I do if there really were cameras in the house? Tay would leave me for sure. I would have to come up with a plan to find out the truth so I could take the right course of action to get rid of any evidence.
* * *
Two hours later I walk out of Body and Soul, feeling a little more relaxed than how I had felt walking in. I was just happy that Tony kept his mouth shut as we drove back to the hotel. Once we made it to the suite, I saw that Tay’von was still not back.
“Do you have any candy, Tony?” I asked as I lay back on the couch.
Tony shook his head yes as he pulled a ziplock bag of the drug out of his pocket. I took the bag from him and cut the drug into two thin lines on the coffee table. I asked Tony if he wanted to join me, but he said no. I sniffed up my two lines and pulled off my pants. I threw my legs up on the couch, and although I was wearing a gold thong, you could clearly see the shape of my phat pussy lips through it.
Tony smiled and said, “Is this how you got Carl?”
“Why? Is this how I can get you?”
“Hey, I see your angle. You’re young, sexy, and clearly dangerous. I’m not hating or anything, but just know that your moves are not on the same level as mines. Okay, so you take off your pants and sit with your legs spread.” He smiled and shook his head and continued. “Do you know how many girls I see while on the road with Tay who play the same games that you do? These games aren’t anything new, Tangie.”
I stood up and put my hands on my hips. “Well, if my game isn’t up to par, then where are all the other girls, Tony? Why is it that I am here and they are not?” I asked as I put one of my legs up on the arm of the chair that he was sitting in.
I pulled my thong to one side and got closer to his face. “Nigga, you haven’t even seen my game, so what do you know?”
I spread my pussy lips so that he could get a better look at my cave. “Take a good look, Tony. This hole doesn’t look like them other bitches’ shit that you are used to seeing. I do everything I can to keep my shit tight, so don’t put those other bitches’ game up against mine.”
Tony reached up and touched me. He played with my clit, then put his finger in me. I closed my eyes and enjoyed it. He slid a second finger in, then tried to put in a third. I held my pussy tight, and he couldn’t get it in.
“Yeah, okay, you got a tight little cat, I’ll give you that, but look at you.”
He kept on fingering me, then pushed my leg down and stood up. He then pulled the same leg up and held it while pulling me closer to him. He used his thumb to rub my clit as he used a finger to fuck me.
“Look at you, Tangie. You’re just like the rest of them. Here you are in your superstar boyfriend’s hotel room, and you have his bodyguard’s hand in your pussy. Is this what having a tight game is?”
He laughed but continued to finger fuck me until I came. It was feeling way too good for me to stop him and slap him, so I finished getting off before doing so. But he didn’t just take it. After I slapped the taste out of his mouth, he grabbed me close and slid the fingers that he had just had inside me into my mouth. This was turning me on, so I sucked them.
“Yeah, you’re a nice little ho. I know that Tay is fucking your ass good, and I also know that Carl is too.” He smiled like he knew all the answers to his own questions. “Who’s next?”
I made sure I licked his fingers clean, then told him the truth. “It’s not you, so don’t worry about it.”
He touched my breasts, then moved down to my ass. We stood there in what looked like a hugging position while he put his lips to my ear.
“Bitch, it’s just a matter of time before Tay’von sees you for who you really are. And when he’s no longer blinded by your fat ass and your tight little pussy, you’ll be out, just like the ones who were here before you. Then you’ll be here fucking me, hoping that I can hook you back up with Tay. But it will be too late, and I’ll just fuck you and move on. That’s how it always goes down, Tangie, and your story won’t be any different.”
“So do you really want to play this game with me, Tony?”
Again, he laughed. “Well, you know what they say, don’t you? Players are always going to play, right?”
“Well, game on, then, muthafucka. I sure hope that you’re ready to really get down, ’cause once you take a seat at my game table, there’s no second place. Winner takes all, and I was born a winner.”
And with my last warning, he left.
After what had just gone down with Tony, I needed to take a nap. He had just worked my last nerve, and I was not in a happy mood. I rested for about three hours, then woke up and took a hot shower. I couldn’t wait to see who was going to be at the show. I was sure that I was going to be one of the hottest bitches there, and I was ready to strut my stuff.
After my shower, I lotioned up and put on some of my Donna Karan Cashmere Mist perfume. It was soft and sweet and always made me feel like a true woman. That night I was wearing Gucci from head to toe. I put on tiny black shorts and very high heels. For my top, I put on a see-through black cupped shirt that had gold sparkles around the neck that dripped all the way down between my breasts. I added a gold Gucci belt and clutch as finishing touches. I looked at myself, and I was happy with how I looked, so I made my way down to the waiting limo.
Pulling up to a concert was always crazy. You had your pure rap fans. You had your half-dressed ladies who were hoping to bag a star or at least to sleep with one, and then you had the people who came just to see the famous people. Tony took me past the waiting people, but before we could make it all the way into the stadium, this white guy took my hand and asked me if I was the girl from Tay’von’s video. I told him yes, and then he asked me to take a picture with him. After doing so, Tony took my hand and we went inside.
The walls were lined with reporters, women, and the rappers’ entourages. I got jealous looks, but I pushed my nose up in the air and walked with my head held high. There was this one fat girl that I noticed, and she was looking at me extra hard. She was tall, about five feet four, and weighed about 250 pounds. The more we looked at each other, the more I noticed how pretty she was. Whereas my skin had a light Indian tan look, she had a darker tan complexion. Our hair had almost the same texture, but she wore hers in big curls. Her makeup was flawless, and she was dressed to kill, even for her size. Even her strong presence matched mine.
I could feel her from a mile away. I felt like we were two bulls staring at each other, waiting for the right time to attack. She possessed as much arrogance as I did, and neither of us would be the first to look away. Who was that bitch? It was as if she had all the right in the world to be in there. Black walked up to me just then, and by the look on his face, I could tell what he was thinking about.
“Hey, Tangie. Looking good,” Black said to me as he gave me a hug.
I hugged him a little longer when I saw Shamika come out of his dressing room. She stopped and talked to the big girl while they both eyed me.
“I am always looking good, Black. Who is that girl Shamika’s talking to?”
He turned and looked at Shamika as if he wanted to kill her. He kind of got this funny look on his face but quickly tried to hide it.
“Oh, that’s just an old friend of hers. Why do you want to know?”
“I am just asking since she is the only one that looks almost as good as me.” I said this in a joking tone, but I really did mean it.
Shamika walked over to us and flashed a fake smile. I stood there and looked her over. This chick had on a bright pink halter dress that she had to keep pulling down to stop it from riding up and showing her ass. Her hair was jet-black, with hot pink highlights, and this time it was a wig. She was just a pure mess.
“How are you doing, Shamika? I must say that you are looking really nice tonight.”
I barely got that lie out without laughing. I pulled Tony’s hand and started to walk away so that I wouldn’t laugh in her face. I heard her thank me as I walked away. Everyone within earshot had got my joke except for her. When I walked into Tay’s dressing room, there were about ten people in there.
“Damn, baby. I’m surprised that you made it on time,” Tay joked.
“I’m sure you are,” I answered while giving all the women in the dressing room evil eyes.
Tay sat down in the chair that had his name on the back of it, then patted his lap, telling me to sit on it. As I walked by the men, they all let out a loud damn!
“Yah niggas better cut that shit out. This is my girl, Tangie, I was telling you all about.”
“It’s okay, Tay. Your friends are just letting you know that your girl is the shit,” I joked.
All his friends laughed and shook their heads in agreement.
Time was flying by, and it was almost time for Tay to hit the stage. We walked backstage and watched Black finish his set. He rocked the crowd and left them wanting more. This was what an opening act was supposed to do—get the crowd hyped and ready for the main act—although Black considered himself a headliner like Tay. The announcer let the crowd know that Tay’von “Too Fine to Be Rapping” was about to come out, and they went crazy. He kissed me, then ran out on the stage.
In the corner of my eye, I could see that fat bitch pitching a fit about something, but I ignored her. I watched Tay for about thirty minutes, before I turned around to head back to his dressing room. As I pivoted around, I bumped into someone. I had had no idea that anyone was standing behind me, so I was a little annoyed . . . until I saw him.
I said, “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know—”
He cut me off with a wave of his hand. “It’s okay. I have been waiting for you to turn around, so if it took you bumping into me for me to see your face, then so be it.”
I just smiled.
This man had a presence that was full of power. He was at a hip-hop concert, yet he was wearing a tailored designer suit. He had set off his suit with a nice arrangement of diamonds that sparkled just as bright as all of mine. He was as big as any well-built male model, just as tall, and just as fine. He had a nice milk chocolate complexion and nicely shaped up facial hair. His hair was cut short and flowed with waves. He looked like he was a sexy twenty-five-year-old, but he later told me his true age was really thirty-three. He extended his hand to me, and I shook it. He made my body quiver the same way Blair Underwood did in Set It Off. His face looked like a genetic copy of Blair’s, and it took me back to that sex scene he had with Jada, and I wanted to stay there.
“Hi. I’m Carmello. And you are?”
“I’m Tangie.”
After shaking my hand, he held it and spoke. “Where are you going in such a hurry, Tangie?”
I took my hand back from his reluctantly. “Oh, I just need a pick-me-up.”
He smiled as if he knew what I was talking about. “Are you here with anyone?”
“Yes. He’s out onstage,” I answered.
There was a brief look of shock on his face; then it went away when things clicked in his head.
“Do you mind if I join you?”
I smiled. “I go to parties. I don’t throw them. So unless you are giving out goodies, there is no need to even come.” I wanted to let him know that I was not going to share my drugs with him. Everything that I had was for me alone.
“Come on, baby. Do I look like a tagalong? You should be able to tell that I am the one who throws parties.”
I took his hand and walked toward Tay’s dressing room. I looked around to see if I saw Carl or Tony so that I could tell them where I would be, but they were nowhere in sight. The only one I saw was that big bitch, and she was watching my every step.
“Why don’t we go to my car instead of this dressing room?” Carmello asked once we reached Tay’s door, but I wasn’t that crazy.
I knew that Tay would be taking a five-minute break soon, and I didn’t want him to flip out if he couldn’t find me. So I walked into the dressing room and sat on the couch. Carmello got my hint and walked in after me.
“So what are you into, Miss Tangie?” Carmello asked, taking a seat on the couch.
“What do you have?”
It turned out that this man was a walking drugstore. He had everything any drug head could ever want, but I stuck to my weed and coke. We chilled for a while, and I got high as hell. He had some top-notch shit. I saw him reach into his pocket and pull out some pills.
“Are you into Ecstasy?” he asked.
“It’s okay. I just hate that it makes me grind my teeth.”
“Well, I have a trick for that, if you are willing to try it.”
We had done a lot of lines, and we had smoked a lot of weed, but I said, “Fuck it.”
He handed me the pills but told me to do another line of coke first before swallowing them. I did as he told me to, and thirty minutes later the pills kicked in. Damn, I was fucked up. My whole face was numb, but the rest of my body felt really good.
“So, how close are you to Tay’von?” he asked.
I looked at him like I did not understand what he was asking.
“I’m just asking because normally, a stranger can’t walk into a rapper’s dressing room while he’s not in it, so you have to know him pretty well,” he explained.
“Oh, well, I live with him, so you can think of me as his girlfriend, I guess.”
“You’re his girlfriend? Wow! You don’t find too many girlfriends on the road. They usually stay at home and shop,” Carmello joked.
I just smiled at him, and he continued to ask questions.
“You and Tay must be tight, then?”
“You can say that.”
“How are you dealing with his fame?”
“I’m dealing. He’s not the first famous guy that I have ever been with.”
“Oh really? Well, is he happy at his label?”
“Well, I haven’t really asked him that, but I don’t hear him complaining,” I replied.
“Oh, I see. Well, do you think that he will renew his contract with the same label—” He stopped talking.
Tay’von and Carl were standing in the doorway, and neither of them looked happy. Tay told Carl to go and tell the show conductor to prolong his five-minute break. Then Tay shut the door and looked at me, then at Carmello.
“What the fuck is going on in here?” he snarled.
“Aw, come on, Tay. I was just having a conversation with your lady here,” Carmello said.
“Man, don’t give me that. Why are you here? And don’t give me that bullshit about you and Tangie having a conversation, ’cause by the looks of it, there’s more drugging going on than talking.”
“Baby, he is just chillin’ in here with me. We didn’t do anything—”
Tay’von cut me off, refusing to listen to what I had to say. “How am I supposed to know that, Tangie? And you know what fucks with me? It’s the fact that you’re in my dressing room, getting high with some man that you don’t even know. And when I ask him what he is doing here, he can’t even answer me.”
“Look, man, I just wanted to come by and check out the show, and I was hoping that we could finish our conversation that you walked out on,” Carmello interjected.
“You’re checking out the show, yet you’re in here with Tangie. Come on, man. You and I both know why you are here, and I already told you that I want no part of it.”
“Damn, Tay, you’re making this shit way too hard on yourself. One day you are going to need me, and by then I won’t want to help you. You’ll see. They always come to me when they need help, and you will do the same,” Carmello said as he got off the couch. He stomped out of the dressing room.
“Yeah, whatever, nigga,” was all that Tay said as he shut the door behind Carmello.
Tay turned and stared at me. “What in the hell were you thinking, Tangie? You don’t even know that man. How are you going to bring him back here without even thinking about how I would feel about it?”
“Baby, we just came back here to smoke and do some lines. He seemed nice, and he talked as if you two were friends, so I thought that it would be okay.”
Tay just stood by the door, clenching his teeth. He finally said, “Did you even ask him his name, Tangie?”
“He told me that his name was Carmello. Why? Should I know anything else about him?”
Tay looked at me as if I was dumb. “Come on, Tangie. As much as you have been around the music biz, you should know who that is. That’s Carmello Green, from Green Note Records.”
My mouth dropped open. He was one of the biggest black record label owners in the business. I had heard about him but had never met him in person.
“So what’s your beef with him? He looks like he is getting paid,” I said.
Tay’von looked at me as if he wanted to hit me. “Why do you want to know? All you care about is getting high and how paid niggas are. Do me a favor and don’t bring any more strays back to my dressing room.”
With that, he left the dressing room. I smoked the rest of the blunt that I had put out, and then walked back out into the hallway. Carmello was still out there, leaning against the wall, looking just as fine as he had when I first bumped into him.
“He didn’t come down on you too hard, did he?” Carmello asked me with a devilish smile on his face.
“No, he didn’t, but you could have told me that he didn’t like your ass.”
“Would it have made a difference? We were just getting high, right?” he asked as he reached out and caught me as I stumbled a little to the right.
He went into his pocket with his other hand and pulled out a business card. “Look, Tangie, I’ve got to go, but take my card. Maybe you will need it one day.”
I took it from him and put it in my purse. He said goodbye and let me go. I watched him walk away, and for a moment I thought about how good he might be in bed. As I snapped out of my thoughts, I saw the big girl in the same spot, still looking at me. I wanted to tell her to fuck off, but if she was there with some other celebrity, then I didn’t want to get Tay in trouble. But who cared, anyway? She just wanted to be me. She just wanted to be in my shoes, so I let her stare. Maybe then she would know what a real bad bitch looked like. If she was in the next city, I would just work my shit and rub it in her fat face that she would never be me, that she could never be in my position.
“That’s right, bitch. Envy me, because I’m not thinking about you,” I said aloud in a low tone while wondering if I would ever see Carmello again.