Max

D

etective Ocon called and said they had the records. "I have assigned someone the task of tracing them, and as soon as I hear back, I will let you know." I could not wait. But meanwhile, I was worried about Max. She seems too lost in thought these days.

Do not get me wrong, she is not slacking off on her duty or anything, but she just seems more disturbed and on edge than usual. Nathan left this morning, so now I had the opportunity to talk to Max. I had no problem doing it while Nathan was around, but then I realized she might not take too kindly to that.

After all, he is a stranger to her, and it does not matter whether I trust him or not. "Hey, Max," I said as I sat down beside her. She was going through something on her laptop. "Hey, Victoria, everything alright?" "Yeah, of course, but that is what I wanted to ask of you. Is everything alright with you? You seem a lot more tense and on edge these days than usual. Did something happen?" At hearing this, she stopped looking at her laptop and instead set it aside. "What do you mean?" "Well, yesterday, you checked the locks on windows and doors three times even though I told you they were fine and you had already gone through them.

You also yelled at Nathan because you got surprised when he got up to get water in the middle of the night. Although, I do not blame you for that one. I would yell, too, if I sensed someone walking around the house in the middle of the night. Aside from all of this, you have also been really quiet since we got back.

So, let me ask again, is everything okay?" "You know, with those observation skills, you could have made it as a detective." I smiled at her statement but refused to back down. "Since that night, I am just a lot more nervous. Before it, I only had a record of things happening to you; nothing happened in front of me.

Because of that, I think everything just felt miles beyond me, and I thought that it would not touch you or me if I was around. But, that night, everything was very real for me. I realized that at any moment, anything could happen to you, and I might not be able to do much about it.

I guess that's why I am so on edge and double-checking everything. I am a lot more worried than I was before." Okay, that makes sense. "Well, I am not going to say that you should not be worried or something because I am worried too. But I will say, you have no reason to doubt yourself. You are an amazing cop and very good at your job. The only reason that happened was that I refused to listen to you, not because you did not do your job. So yes, it is alright if you are worried, but you should not doubt your skills." I could feel her thinking about what I had just said.

Finally, she nodded her head, and I sighed in relief. “There is one more thing.” Just as I was about to get up, I heard Max speak up. I looked at her, waiting for her to continue. “Have you thought about who it could have been?” I was dreading that question. I had been dreading it since Detective Ocon asked me to think about it. I knew it was vital to do so, but the thought that someone who was my own family or friend could have betrayed me was too much for me to bear.

I shook my head. "Victoria, I am not speaking as a cop here when I say this, but as your friend. I have a feeling that you already know who this is." I was too stunned to speak. "What do you mean by that, Max? If I knew who it was, then why would I continue to torture myself by not telling the police?"

Max shook her head as she said, in barely a whisper, "I am not saying you are purposefully withholding information or something. I think you already have thought, in the back of your mind, about who it can be. But I also think that your own mind is protecting you from the shock of it. I think you are in denial." I was getting angry at Max now. How can she think that I would withhold information that could save my life and countless others just because I cannot handle it? That was absurd. "Max, I respect you and look at you as a friend, but I feel like you are really crossing a line here. Why would I put everyone I love and myself in danger simply because of denial?" Max gave me a very small smile.

I knew she meant nothing by it, but it felt like that smile was mocking me as if telling me that I was too weak for my own good. "Please do not be mad at me, okay? All I am asking is, just think about it. Just give it a thought, and if I am wrong, I will apologize without any hesitation. Just.... think about it; that is all I ask for. It will help all of us and really move things along.”

With that, she took her laptop and went into the kitchen. “I am making lunch today, just so you know.” Her voice sounded muffled and repressed because of the distance. I could feel her words ringing in my ears. Was she right? Did I know already? It does feel like a real possibility because every time I try to think about who it can be, my brain shuts down the thought by guilt-tripping me about suspecting the people who love me and have supported me through thick and thin.

––––––––