25 Days Before

I’d slipped going down the trellis, falling back onto a prickly evergreen bush by the porch. It scraped my hands and face something awful, but I didn’t feel it. I only realized it when I saw the dried blood on my sheets the following day. My reflection in the mirror was that of someone who’d gotten into a fight with a cat—and lost.

Over the night, I’d cried myself dry of tears. I blamed only myself. I’d started this.

And I knew I needed to finish it.

Even then, I thought I could find a way to reverse what had happened, to put life back the way it had been before. No, we were forever altered, but I thought that maybe I could still make my relationship right with Declan.

That morning, a Saturday, I texted Kane: Can you come over?

I barely ever texted Kane these days; usually, it was part of a group text. And though he was the type of guy who slept in on weekends, he responded at once: What’s up?

I typed in: I need to see you asap. Just come over.

He didn’t respond, but five minutes later, he appeared on my front stoop, knocking. I nearly mowed down my father, who was walking at a leisurely pace to answer the door. “I got it,” I told him, nearly toppling him on the staircase in order to intercept Kane.

Kane was wearing an Eagles T-shirt, ball cap, and sweats despite the frigid weather and looked like he’d just woken up. I yanked him inside, afraid that Declan would see us. I’d already made enough of a mess with him thinking Kane and I had something going on. I didn’t want to make the situation worse. When we were inside, he studied me in the darkened foyer. “What the hell happened to you?”

I motioned for him to be quiet and led him up to my bedroom. There, I found the photo I’d snapped and handed it to him. I hadn’t actually looked at it as it developed, because I couldn’t bring myself to. He studied it, squinting. “Wow. This captures it so well. What the hell is it?”

I grabbed the photo. Shit. I’d gotten mostly blinds in the picture, and only a blurred sliver of what might have been Declan’s arm around Luisa’s waist. But it was enough to bring back the horror of what I’d seen last night. I started to sob again.

“Whoa.” Kane sat me down on the bed and waited for me to calm down.

I tried to explain, but my throat was choked with sobs. “I went to Declan’s room last night. And…and he was with…Luisa…”

He stiffened. “What?”

I nodded. “They were…”

He stood up. “You’re wrong. You have to be wrong.”

“I’m not. I know what I saw. And I…” I covered my face with my hands. “There was no mistake, Kane. They were on his bed.”

He ripped his phone out of his pocket and started to text.

“Wait, what are you doing?” I asked, alarmed.

“What do you think?” he snapped. “I’m going to ask her what she was doing last night. She told me she was still sick with that stomach bug, but I thought it was bullshit.”

I grabbed the phone from him. “Wait.” He tried to swipe it back, but I scooted off the bed. “Look. I don’t…I don’t want to confront him.”

“What? Why the hell not? If Declan…and my girlfriend… I sure as hell want to confront him. It’s got to be a mistake. Declan wouldn’t…”

“Why not? You slept with his girlfriend.”

Kane’s face was red. Few things made him angry, but this qualified. I could tell he was running the past through his brain, trying to make sense of it. “If he did…I want to be the first to kick his ass.”

“What about Luisa?”

“I wouldn’t put it past her. Tell me you didn’t see the way she looked at Declan. She was so jealous of you, it was practically coming out her ears. And after what we did…she saw her chance and she took it.”

I put my head in my hands. “This is so horrible, Kane. I want it to stop. I want us all to go back to the way we were.” Tears were still flowing from my eyes. “Please, Kane. I love Declan, more than anything. And I think he still loves me. There was something about Declan’s face. I think he realized what he did was a mistake, even as it was happening.”

“So?”

“So don’t you see? They came together because of what we did. They aren’t in love. It’s…getting even. Now we’re even. If we give them time, they’ll come back to us. Isn’t that what you want?”

He studied me. “Yeah. I guess.” I handed the phone to him, and he stared at it. “So what do I say to her? Nothing?”

I nodded. “Yes. As hard as it is, we ride this out. And that means…”

He looked at me and pressed his lips together. We’d agreed, after the shit hit the fan about New Year’s, that it was better if we lay low. Separated. It was hard, because our lives were so closely entwined, but we’d done our best. We still gravitated toward each other—without thinking, innocently ending up together—since he was the peanut butter to my jelly, the bacon to my eggs.

“I got it. I shouldn’t be here.” He pocketed his phone and strode to the window, looking across at his house. “What were they doing in there? Were they…” He threw up his hands. “You know, you’re right. I don’t want to know. My stepbrother.”

The images sifted through my mind again. I hadn’t thought Declan was the type to get revenge, but it was possible. Love and rage make people do all kinds of things. “Well, we—”

“We did that before we even knew him. What Declan did… It’s fucking worse. And you know it.” He clenched his fists.

Because I’d lied to Declan for so long, I didn’t quite see it that way. But I knew Kane couldn’t be trusted to ride this out. When he got riled, watch out.

And he was definitely riled.