CHAPTER TWENTY

Elliot’s scream was, not surprisingly, louder than usual. It was so piercing that the sasquatch let go of the professor’s leg and clapped its palms over its ears. The professor landed in a pile at the giant’s huge feet, and then he scrambled to get away. But the sasquatch put one big hairy foot on top of him, pinning him to the ground.

Raven grabbed Elliot and put her hand over his mouth.

“Quiet,” she whispered. “Don’t scream again. If you do, the professor might get stomped.”

The sasquatch lowered its hands from its ears. It scowled down at the humans.

“Don’t make eye contact,” Mack whispered. “Look toward the ground.”

“How can I do so?” the professor wheezed. “Its big foot . . . is on top of . . . my face.”

Uchenna said to Mack, “We have to save him!”

“Shhh,” said Mack. He raised his left hand slowly, and then pressed his palm over his heart.

The sasquatch watched Mack’s sign. Its face softened. It began to lift its foot from the professor’s face.

But just then, a small creature came gliding out of the sky and landed on the hirsute primate’s long arm.

“Jersey!” Uchenna cried. The sasquatch’s weight shifted back onto its foot. The professor made a sound like his head was being crushed. Which it was. The sasquatch lifted its huge hand to flatten Jersey like a human would crush a mosquito.

“No!” Elliot cried.

But instead of crushing him, the sasquatch’s hand slowed, and then gently began to pet Jersey’s head. The scowl left the hairy giant’s face.

It lifted its foot off Fauna’s head.

“Huh. I think she likes Jersey,” murmured Raven.

“How do you know it’s a she?” Uchenna asked.

A sound came from the bushes to their right. Three more sasquatch came out—one a bit shorter than Elliot, one the same height as Uchenna, and one slightly taller than Raven.

“I think that’s their mom,” Raven whispered.

The sasquatch children looked shyly at the humans, and then up at their mother. She walked over to them and then sat down, heavily, on the ground. Jersey stayed perched on her shoulder.

The humans watched as the three sasquatch children crowded around Jersey, petting his head and stroking his wings. He purred and licked their faces.

And then, Jersey scrambled to the forest floor and over to Elliot. He scurried up Elliot’s pant leg and shirt, and perched on top of his head.

“Uh . . . ,” said Elliot. “What is he doing?”

No one answered him. The sasquatch children were gazing curiously at Jersey—and at Elliot. Slowly, they started to move toward him.

“Uh . . . guys?” Elliot said.

The three sasquatch kids moved into a circle around Elliot.

“Any advice?” Elliot asked. “Mr. gәqidәb? Raven? Anyone?”

The sasquatch kid standing right in front of Elliot motioned with a hand. Elliot stared. She motioned again. It looked like the sasquatch child was telling him to sit down.

“Uh, Mr. gәqidәb, what is going on?” asked Elliot.

“Sasquatch talk to one another with sign language,” Mack replied. “All apes do—and a lot of the signs are the same across the ape and human family. You were born understanding many of the same signs that they use.”

“So, what is she saying?” Elliot asked. He wasn’t sure why he thought this sasquatch kid was a she, but he did.

“What do you think she’s saying?” Mack asked. The sasquatch did the hand motion again.

“I think she’s telling me to sit down.”

“So do it, boyfriend,” Raven said.

Elliot sat down.

The circle of sasquatch children tightened around Elliot. He closed his eyes and tried to breathe calmly. Inside his head, he was thinking, What is happening? What are they going to do to me? Why is no one helping? Why is Jersey sitting on my head? Should I scream? Probably not. I want to scream. Maybe I will.

And then, the sasquatch girl lifted Jersey off Elliot’s head. She held the little Jersey Devil in her arms and stroked him like he was a cat. Elliot began to get up. But the sasquatch girl made a hand signal that looked like “don’t move.” So Elliot didn’t move.

A moment later, he felt delicate fingers touching his hair. His eyes went wide.

“What is happening?” he whispered.

Uchenna and Raven were watching, and started to giggle. Professor Fauna was still on the ground next to the sasquatch mother, but now they were sitting as if they’d been friends forever. Mack was crouching nearby, grinning.

“They’re doing your hair,” Uchenna said.

“WHAT?” Elliot cried.

This startled the sasquatch children. The sasquatch holding Jersey frowned and put her hand over her mouth. Elliot nodded. She nodded back. He nodded again. Then one of the sasquatch kids doing his hair grabbed his head to make him stop nodding and stay still.

Finally, the sasquatch mother stood up. The children stopped what they were doing. The girl holding Jersey kissed the top of his head—Uchenna’s heart just about melted—and then handed Jersey back to Elliot. Then they turned and headed into the forest.

In an instant, the sasquatch family had disappeared.

None of the humans moved.

Then they all exhaled.

“Whoa!” Uchenna exclaimed. “That. Was. Awesome.”

“Truly spectacular!” Fauna said, brushing himself off and picking pine needles from his beard. “How fine to see a family of them! All in such superb condition!”

“That was my friend,” said Mack. When Elliot and Uchenna looked at him quizzically, he added, “Who chased me with a stick.”

Uchenna said, “She’s all grown up!”

“We both are,” Mack agreed.

Professor Fauna turned to Elliot. “And the grooming they were doing! Elliot, you look magnífico!”

Long strands of pale green moss and twigs with tiny pinecone buds stuck every which way out of Elliot’s curly mop of hair. Raven and Uchenna broke up in a fit of giggling.

Elliot sighed. “I wish I could see myself right now.”

“No,” said Raven, “you don’t.”

She and Uchenna laughed harder.

And then they stopped.

Mack had tapped them on their shoulders. “Look,” he said.

An all-too-familiar blond woman was standing at the top of a nearby hill, waving her arms and shouting at her harassed-looking cameraman.

As the wind changed, her voice drifted down to them. “Randy, you idiot! What do you mean you missed the shot! You could have had a family of Bigfeet on camera and weren’t set up yet?”

Andy was muttering something about batteries dying and his name being Andy and how he once knew a guy named Randy in middle school who was a real jerk and maybe he should just make a name tag for himself. Sam Brounsnout was nowhere to be seen.

“We’ve gotta lose them,” Mack said. “Quick, follow me.”

He didn’t have to say it twice. Uchenna, Elliot, Raven, and the professor all ducked under the thick-needled branches onto a small trail that led into deep woods. They started to run. They ran and ran and ran, until Elliot’s lungs were burning and Uchenna’s feet felt like iron. Jersey glided from tree to tree above their heads.

Finally, Mack pulled up. “It’s okay. We can stop now. No way they’re going to catch up with us lugging that TV camera.”

“Or in stilettos,” Raven added, her shoulders rising and falling.

“Wait a minute,” Uchenna said. “Where’s Professor Fauna?”

Mack’s head swiveled in one direction and then another. “Mito!” he called. “Mito?”

“Professor Fauna?”

“Professor Fauna!!!”

There was no answer. The founder of the Unicorn Rescue Society was gone.